How far would you be willing to go for a friend? Would you leave everything in a second just to keep her alive?

After a case gone wrong closes, Dr. George Huang orders Detective Olivia Benson to take some time off. Using her saved up funds, along with some help from the rest of the department, Benson heads off for a week in Europe.

Her week ends but she doesn't return. A confused Detective Elliot Stabler, who was to pick her up at the airport, learns that she didn't board the flight coming home.

After a couple of days, Stabler can no longer ignore his gut. Benson was…is his best friend and he feels something is terribly wrong. Without notifying a soul, Stabler packs his bags and heads for Europe to search for his missing partner.

Unbeknownst to him, Detectives John Munch and Fin Tutuola are on his tail. Ordered by Captain Don Cragen to bring both detectives home, they begin a search as well.

This story will take you from New York City to the far reaches of the world and beyond. You'll meet people from all walks of life, some good, some evil. Questions will be answered and character will be tested. Will the find Detective Benson? If they do, will they want to find her? In just a short period of time everything will change and nothing will ever be the same again.

Author's Notes: This is my first SVU fanfic so please be gentle when reviewing. That said, I'm open to anything from being called a god to the fanfic world to being flamed.

This is my water testing chapter. The whole thing's written but I'm curious to see how it goes over. My sis is my beta and she's working on the other chapters.

Disclaimer: When I win the lottery, the SVU characters are the first thing I'm going to buy. But until then…

Now onto the Meat and Potatoes

- Lizzie

Beyond Hell's Gates

Reflections of an SVU Detective

"Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your Captain announcing that we have arrived at Heathrow Airport and the doors will be opening soon. It is two thirty in the afternoon with light showers expected throughout the day. We hope you have enjoyed your flight and all of us aboard American Airlines thank you for flying with us today."

Detective Elliot Stabler unbuckled his seat belt, despite the fact that the sign above was still lit. He wanted nothing more than to jump off the plane, even if it was still moving, and run into the city. He was exhausted but that wasn't anything knew. He'd scarcely slept for the past two days and he knew that he wouldn't sleep soundly again until he found her.

It wasn't like Olivia Benson to not show up for work. She was a hard working and devoted detective who called ahead if she was going to be thirty seconds late. This was why, despite everyone else telling him that she probably missed her flight and had to wait a few extra days, Stabler had packed his bags and headed for London. Benson would have called him. She wouldn't have left him stranded at the airport waiting for her.

"She might be sleeping in the airport, waiting for a stand by seat and not have a phone card."

The way ADA Casey Novak had stated this Stabler knew she didn't believe what she was staying. They both knew Benson well enough to know that she would fight tooth and nail to find a way to call home.

"Maybe she's shacked up with some guy? While that doesn't sound like Liv, you never know."

Detective Fin Tutuola's tone also wasn't convincing. Benson had never been one to be swept off her feet per se and she certainly would have called home. Benson wasn't one for girly gossip but she at least would have told Stabler not to wait for her.

"Maybe she…"

"Just shut up," Stabler had slammed his coffee mug on the table, sloshing himself with the cold dregs that remained. "I don't feel like hearing conspiracy theories about alien abductions or that maybe Benson was the figment of my imagination after the government stuck a chip in my head."

Detective John Munch didn't look offended by Stabler's harshness. Instead he gave a half smile. "I was only going to say that maybe she's sick and staying a few nights in the hospital…but the chip idea isn't a half bad guess."

Tutuola and Novak had given half smiles at this but Stabler wasn't in a joking mood. One of their own was missing and they were joking about possible conspiracies surrounding her disappearance. Why did everyone seem to think there was some logical explanation to why Benson hadn't returned? Ever since that night at the airport, Stabler had felt a knot form in his stomach as he watched person after person disembark from the airplane and come through the terminal.

When the door had closed behind the last person, Stabler had hurried forward to speak with the worker.

"You can't close up shop yet. There's someone still on board."

The stewardess had given Stabler her best smile and shook her head.

"That's not possible, sir. We check the airplane thoroughly before we close up."

Stabler felt his face growing hot with anger. His devoted partner was still on the airplane, probably about to kick down the door so she could exit. He didn't want to yell at the woman but she was being such a pain in the ass. He scanned her nametag, which read Janice Black.

"Ms. Black, trust me on this. There is someone still on board. A woman in her early forties with longer brown hair that she's probably pulled back in a pony tail."

Janice Black was obviously trying to keep the smile on her face and the conversation pleasant.

"Are you sure she isn't on another flight, Mr…"

"Detective Stabler, and yes I'm positive this is her flight. Will you please have them go over the plane again?"

Janice Black's smile grew wider in her attempt to not put Detective Stabler in his place. She gave a curt nod before picking up her cell phone.

"Of course, Detective Stabler. May I assume that your wife has the same last name as yourself?"

Stabler shook his head. "She isn't my wife. She's my partner and her name's Olivia Benson."

Janice hit a few numbers into her cell phone and turned away from Stabler.

"Yes, Jack, this is Janice. Sorry to bother you but I have a gentleman down here who claims that his partner Olivia Benson is still on board."

There was silence for a time and Stabler was sure this Jack wasn't a happy camper right now.

"Yes, I know you've checked the plane but please double check." There were a few more minutes of quiet before, "Olivia Benson. That's right. Thanks, Jack."

Janice had hung up and returned to Stabler.

"They're going over the plane once more and they're in the process of cleaning it so they should find her. If she was on it."

Stabler found a seat and waited. Twenty minutes later Janice's phone chirped.

"Hi, Jack. Yes. Thank you and I'll relay the news."

Stabler was on his feet in seconds and hurried over to the woman.

"Detective Stabler, there's no one else on the airplane. Jack and his crew went over it with a fine tooth comb and she's not there. I suggest calling her cell phone and, if that doesn't work, you can find another employee who can contact Heathrow and tell you if she was on the plane."

Stabler nodded and muttered a thank you before dialing Benson's number from memory. It rang several times before going directly to her voice mail.

"Liv, it's Elliot. I don't know what's going on but I think you gave me the wrong flight. I'll hang out for a while so when you get this, give me a call."

Stabler had closed and pocketed his phone before heading towards a ticket office. JFK was a busy airport most of the time and today was no exception. People were hustling about to and fro, trying to check luggage and get to flights on time.

Stabler had waited in the line at a help desk and finally made it to the front where a cheery looking woman with her bushy red hair pulled back in a pony tail smiled at him.

"Good afternoon, sir. How might I be of service today?"

Stabler felt the knot in his stomach tighten. Would they be able to help him? Focusing on the matter at hand, he plunged on.

"I was supposed to pick up my partner, Olivia Benson, today and she didn't exit her flight."

The woman nodded, the smile never leaving her face.

"Sir, have all the passengers disembarked yet?"

Stabler felt the knot loosen and he found himself getting angry. What kind of idiot did these people think he was? If there were people still exiting would he really come running here because Benson wasn't the first person off? No! Stabler wanted to rant and yell at this woman, who would have put the Cheshire Cat to shame, but knew that these were routine questions. Didn't potential suspects get angry when you asked them questions that should have been routine? He remembered how he always hated when they would explode on him. He was just doing his job after all. Focusing on the matter at hand Stabler plunged on.

"Yes, I even had them double check the plane. Janice Black sent me over to you."

The woman never failed to stop smiling.

"Have you tried to contact Ms. Benson? Is it possible that she simply missed her flight and is stranded at the airport?"

Damn! Stabler knew these questions were routine but they were still a pain in the ass.

"I called her cell phone but it went right to voice mail. Also, Detective Benson always calls if she's going to be delayed. Ms. Black said that it would be possible for you to look up the flights at Heathrow and see if Olivia Benson's ticket number went through the system."

The desk worker, still smiling her smile that was starting to grate on Stabler's nerves, nodded.

"That can be arranged. Do you have Detective Benson's flight time, gate and ticket number?"

Stabler felt his annoyance growing. If he had known Benson wouldn't turn up, he would have brought everything. However, he expected to be meeting Munch, Fin and Novak in a bar by this time with Benson regaling them with her adventures in Europe.

"Give me one moment."

He pulled out his cell phone and called Dr. George Huang. After all, he'd been the one to order Benson to take time off and get out of New York. He'd been the one to suggest Europe and he had been the one to purchase her ticket. Stabler hoped that Huang would have the information ready to go.

"Dr. Huang," came the reply from a man Stabler had hated in the beginning but had formed a friendship with the more cases they worked together. Right now however, Stabler couldn't help but blame him for this. Why not encourage Benson to stay in America but leave New York?

"It's Detective Stabler and I don't have time for niceties now. I was supposed to pick Detective Benson up at the airport and she didn't arrive."

"Are people still exiting…"

"No!" Elliot had been willing to retell the story once and wasn't in the mood to do so again. "Everyone's off the plane, I've called her cell, I've had them recheck the plane and now I'm trying to find out if Liv was even on her flight out of London."

"What do you need to know, Elliot?" Huang's voice held nothing, no anger, no annoyance at been screamed at. Just calm.

"I need her ticket number, her flight time and gate number."

"One minute."

There was silence and Stabler could hear the psychiatrist going through papers looking for the information. Seconds later the shuffling stopped and Huang was back.

"Okay, Elliot, she was supposed to fly out of Heathrow at eight in the morning, putting her into New York at four o'clock London time and ten our time. Her gate was number fifty four and her seat number was 35G coach."

Stabler jotted all of this down on the back of his hand since he couldn't find a notepad.

"Thanks, George."

"Anything else, Elliot?"

Stabler wracked his brain and shook his head.

"I think that's all."

"Elliot, give me a call when you find out what's going on."

Stabler fought to keep himself from sighing. Huang was truly concerned about Benson and it wasn't his fault any of this had happened.

"You were one of the first on the list, George. I'll call back tonight. When's too late?"

"Whenever. I doubt I'll be able to sleep much until I hear what's wrong. Want me to call anyone else?"

Stabler thought about it and pressed on. "Call Cragen. You can either help him call the rest of the squad or you can pass it on to him. Maybe you should suggest that Cragen wait before passing on the news to too many people incase this is some stupid screw up."

"I'll do my best, Elliot."

Stabler hung up and returned to the desk worker. He read to her the information that Huang had just re-laid off the back of his hand.

Erin Schmidt, the name Stabler read off the Cheshire Cat like woman's name tag, went to work entering data into her computer and pursing her lips. At least that took the smile off her face for a bit. Finally, she sat back and Stabler could tell by her posture that he wasn't going to like the news.

"No one sat in seat 35G for the fight number you gave me."

The knot that had loosened a bit was back and with a vengeance.

"Are you positive?"

The woman gave him a nod. "I'm sorry, sir."

"Is there anything else you can do to help?"

Erin shook her head and Stabler couldn't even find the energy to yell, rant and rave. He simply nodded and slipped out of the line. He had never felt so far apart from Benson. Suddenly the distance between America and Europe was vast. He dialed her cell phone and it went to voice mail after four rings.

Stabler sat in that seat calling Benson's cell for the next hour. He was about to dial it again when it chirped. Stabler felt hope raise in his chest only to have it smashed as Munch's name came up on the screen. He considered ignoring it but finally gave in.

"Stabler."

"It's Munch. Fin, Novak and I have been waiting at the bar for a while. Liv's flight late?"

Stabler sighed. He didn't want to retell the story right now. He didn't want to be wasting time calling people without doing everything in his power to find his partner.

"Just go home…"

His voice trailed off as he heard another cell phone chirp in the background. He heard, "Tutuola" and then, "hi, Captain."

Stabler felt relieved. Cragen would explain everything.

"John, let Cragen get done with Fin and than call me back."

Stabler didn't wait for a reply before hanging up and going back to dialing Benson's number.

Thirty minutes later and still no luck, Stabler's phone chirped and it was Munch again.

"Elliot, we're gonna come and join you at the airport. Cragen and Huang are coming as well. Where are you?"

Stabler looked around and found a McDonald's and gate 44 behind him.

"Gate 44. There's a Micky Ds there as well."

"We'll be there shortly."

The phone went dead and Stabler went back to dialing Benson's number.

The man with the aisle seat stood up and Stabler followed suit. The eight hour flight had seemed much longer and he wanted to get started. It had been two days without a word from Benson. Stabler had started to fear the worst after one day and now all he hoped was to find was her body. He needed closure, to know that she was truly gone. He hadn't mentioned his departure to anyone. Not Fin, Munch, Cragen or even Kathy and his kids. He didn't want anyone on his tail. This was something he had to do alone. As Benson's partner it was his job to protect her and he had failed. He had protected her as many times as she had protected him and now, she took one step away for five seconds and she was gone. Stabler knew he would never forgive himself. The line started to move and Stabler could soon see the exit.

Where has the starlight gone? Dark is the day. How can I find my way home?

Elton John – Endless Night