6:00 p.m Iraq
"Hey man." Jimmy said to Lucas, patting him on the back. "Tough day?" Jimmy asked as Lucas mumbled and remained silent.
"Yeah." Lucas briefly answered. Avoiding eyes with his only true close freind on the grounds.
Jimmy was used to his lack of responses. Ever since that day, the whole group has remaind silent and distant. Chills ran through his back as he thought of those days events. So trying hard to put that aside, Jimmy sat down and put a basketball in front of Lucas. Knowing basketball was the only real cure for his bad moods.
"Come on man. I bet you I'll beat your ass this time. I mean..." Looking at his biceps. " have you seen these guns?"
Jimmy frowned as Lucas remained silent. Just as he was about to try again Jack showed up and slammed his tray on the table.
"Boy you know one day I'm going to beat that Sully's ass!" Jack shouted, while stuffing his face with chili. "Why does he have to be a hard ass all the fuckin time? I mean I was only joking."
"What did you say now?" Jimmy groaned. He knew how Sully never let things go, and how he bugged the shit out of him when he complained about Jack.
"Whellheshoew..."
"Stop. Swallow." After seeing Jack swallowing, "Go ahead."
"What I saying was that he was showing a picture of his family. And he pointed out his mom right, and all I said 'Damn, is that why your back is so fuckin messed up? Because you had to be hugged all your life by that pile of fat ass."
Jimmy hit him on the back of the head."Shit man you said that! Great now Sully is never going to forget that. Do you know how many times he bugs the shit out of me because of you?!"
"Well, I was just joking. There was no need to punish this beautiful face." Jack said while rubbing his black eye.
By this conversation, Lucas couldn't help but smile. He shook his head and said, "Come on Jim, lets see what those bicepes can handle."
Jimmy smiled brightly. "You're on scrawny ass. Come on Jack, you can be my witness when I beat this sp called basketball star"
Heading off to the basketball court... well actually the abandoned area behind the garbage cans, Luc and James played one on one basketball. Of course Lucas slaughtered him, just like he always does, but that doesn't stop them from having a good time. A time where they could not think of the day's events and just focus on screwing around. Its no lie that its hard to let go of what has happened in all of these soldier's time here. Its no lie that all of them stay up all night thinking if they can ever be themselves again. Well, maybe thats just how Lucas Scott's time has been here. All the violence hes witnessed, all the blood he has seen. You probaly thinking well this is what he signed up for. This is what he wanted to do with his life. And your right....he did have the choice. And he made it.
Of course every soldier says that they're doing this for their counrty. To protect the lives of their loved ones. But underneath all that... there is another reason. A reason to just leave... to forger... to runaway from their life back at home. Well maybe for not every soldier.. but for Lucas. People always talk about how Lucas Scott never seems to talk about his home. About the ones he left behind. People say maybe he is an orphan, or he is a runaway.
But the real reason is just he has nothing to say. His mom died 2 years ago. Karen Roe was her name. And she was the best mom anyone could have. Loving, genuine, an all around beautiful person inside and out. She died of breast cancer. Lucas remembers the night she died. It was a cool winter day, with the stars shining against the moonlight. He remembers how she said she was proud of him, proud of who he was. And to make promise that he would find his bliss in life. And he thought he did with a one of a kind Brooke Davis. Brooke. She was the complete opposite of Lucas Scott. Confident, beautiful, full of this certain energy. God knows why she was with him, but Lucas was eternaly grateful for her. She made him laugh, loosen up, live.
But she couldnt find a way to help Lucas after his mom died. She didnt realize that something in him died as well. He felt sad. Lonely. Angry. So he left. No note, no phone call, just his necklace laying on her doorstep. Of course he felt like shit for doing this. For giving up the only thing in his life that gave him meanig. But he felt like it was the right thing to do. To give her up, and let her be with someone who could give her everything. To find her bliss. And he knew he couldn't give that to her.
So as Luc and Jimmy play on the so called basketball court, everything drifts away. Not fully, not forever, just for a few hours. The stars shine, the wind whistles. Little did they know that tomorrow will be the worst day of their lives.
Luc and Jim finsh playing and start heading back to their tents. "Whatever, man you know I was taking it easy on you." Jimmy said while wiping the sweat off from his brow.
Lucas just smiled and nodded. They arrive at their tents and go to their bunks. Lucas takes off his shirt leaving his bruises and scars visible. Their not as bad as some other guys, but there not too good either. So Lucas takes out his favorite the novel Catcher in the Rye, which he's read about ten times.
"You know you've read that book like a hundred times already." Jimmy say laughing as he too craws into his bunk.
"Yeah... I know but its something to get my mind clear. "You know?"
Jimmy nodded, and drifted off to sleep. Lucas opens his book to the page where Brooke's picture lies. He looks over it for a minute. He always loved her smile, with her cute dimples. Even though he left, he never stopped thinking about her. About how she's doing, and what she's up to. He thought about writing a letter to her, to tell her that he drafted into the army. He always feels guilty about not telling her. Maybe he could write to Haley or Nathan so they could tell her.
He sighs. She probably doesn't want to hear from him anyway. She's probably moved on and forgot about him. But still he thinks she deserves to know about where he is. What he's doing. That maybe one day he wont get the chance to tell her hes sorry in person. Or that he loves her and forever will. But a voice in his head says she's better off not knowing. It will be easier that way.
He sighs again, and puts his book away knowing he wont be able to read tonight. He turns off his light and drifts off to a forced sleep. Bombs heard far away, footsteps of the late patrol sound. Wind gusting. For Lucas Scott all he wants is his life to make sense.
This situation's killing me I want my life to make more sense This road is crooked cracked and wrong You see I want my life to make more sense I want my life to make more sense So let me take you by the hand I want my life to make more sense
It's got me right under the thumb
I don't know where I want to be
This doesn't make no sense at all
You're quoting every single line
I spoke too much but I was old before my time, you told me
I want my life to make amends
I want my life to make more sense to me
They got the odds staked nice and high
I don't know how they get along
Me, I just internalize
You can imagine what they'd say
Given the choice if I could fight or walk away, I'm walking
I want my life to make amends
I want my life to make more sense to me
I want my life to make more sense to me
And lead you through this troubled mind
You said yourself we had a plan
To get us all back to the line
We talk about it everyday
But we keep forgetting what it was we came to say
Now don't we
I want my life to make amends
I want my life to make more sense to me
My life to make amends