Title: Strangers
Bemidia
Rating: K+
Disclaimer: I do not have any claim on the pretty boys… My imagination just likes to play with them.
Warning: Here there be light slash. Get over it.
A/N: The first line was a prompt… I'm not sure if I made it up or got it from somewhere… And this ficlet took a life of it's own about three paragraphs in.
Summary: Spike's more hurt about Buffy moving on than he's really letting on. Someone tries to help.
They were like two strangers who knew each other very well.
Passing in the hallways with hurried nods, and wary glances, neither sure how to deal with the situation, that last lie hanging between them.
He wasn't sure they could see it, but he could. The diamond sparkling on her hand, and the absolute pain in blue eyes whenever that twinkle brought his attention to it during meetings.
He wasn't the only one who saw it either. The tension in any room they were both in required scuba diving equipment just to be able to breathe. It was all-encompassing, it affected everyone.
The baby slayers scoffed behind her back.
"How could she? Isn't that against everything she's for?"
Once upon a time, that was how he felt too. How he still feels on some level.
But when pained blue eyes search out his in desperation, he understands.
"How could she not?"
He'd offered her everything she thought she wanted. Punishment and salvation wrapped up in one surprisingly fragile package, made even more delicate with the addition of 'the spark' as Dru still calls it sometimes.
It's enough to make a strong man want to reach out, and snap the last fragile tether between them, and drag the slim body and too brash attitude to him, selfish enough to want someone to want him like that.
He's never been a particularly strong man, and this is trying every good, moral thing he's ever thought about himself.
It's worse at night, when a hard, cool body slips into bed beside him. The tears silent down cheeks so pale from malnutrition they're translucent. Every night he swears he's going to force him to eat in the morning.
But he says nothing and just pulls the body to himself, wrapping himself around the sobs and shakes. He's so careful. So careful to just pet and comfort, so careful to not go further. Though sometimes the other man offers. He's forced to remind himself that he loves the other man too much to degrade the situation to that.
He knows if he gives in, the vampire will turn his entire attention to him. He'll stop looking at her like she's torn his unbeating heart out. But it won't be real. Not really. The blonde will just be pretending.
So, instead, every night he just licks the tears away, and kisses Spike so gently, tenderly, lovingly, trying to make him understand how he feels without the words. He always refuses to deepen it to anything else, always just tucks the blonde into his arms, and always reminds himself over and over again that he refuses to be Spike's punishment.
And prays in the morning he'll remember why.
A/N: I really couldn't make up my mind between Giles and Xander so I left it open. But I feel its more Xander. Have fun pretending it's whoever you want it to be, but please review.