Eternal Summer Dwells

Whilst from off the waters fleet
thus I rest my printless feet....

Milton, Comus

the obligatory (short) author's note: Back in action. Battery recharged. Not much to say except that this takes place in the same universe as Une Danse Ronde et al. And that the title is nabbed from John Milton's Comus along with the epigraph. As always: not mine. never will be. money made from this = zero dollars.

* * *

He stole it. Of all th' things ta steal in the world, he stole it for us. A gift. Somethin' ta show he cared. Deeply an' violently in ways he'd never say out loud, could never say because some of us aren't verbal creatures. Not when it comes down ta th' people we love. An' what do ya say when your boyfriend's standin' there after work, with that drowned puppy look because even though it was wet outside that didn't mean people stopped needing their documents delivered? Wet shirt peekin' out just right, muddy calves from puddle splashes an' th' most amazin' eyes. He was drippin' on th' kitchen floor. Big, cloudy drops on th' yellow flowered linoleum.

Ah fingered the paper, slightly damp, even though he'd carried it inside his jacket. Ah'd say "next ta his heart" if Ah were a certain kind o' girl. My head might've been spinnin' a little, but then it's hard ta say about that. Hard day at work, which my feet reminded me about every other minute.

"What is this?" Ah managed.

He opened my hands gently. Ah'd crumpled th' things. "Tickets," he replied softly.

"Tickets?" Well, damn, wasn't Ah th' clever little echo?

"A vacation, cheré."

"For us."

He grinned at me, but there was enough uncertainty in it ta make it into a ghost of his usual expression. "Mais (well), had t' get some for John and Kitty." He rolled his eyes melodramatically an' Ah felt somethin' stir in my stomach that seemed like laughter. "Never hear de end o' dat one if I didn't."

Ah knew there'd be trouble before th' next words tumbled out. Ah knew there wasn't any way Ah couldn't ask. Even though Ah never wanted ta hear th' answer in th' first place. "How did ya afford this?"

At first, Ah could never tell Remy's lies from his truths. But that was a long time ago. Ah wasn't mad at him for lyin' then, back when we barely knew each other, even though Ah loved ta give him shit. Even though he'll swear up an' down that he never, would never. Because that's how he knew Ah wasn't like anyone else, so he says, because he couldn't lie ta me. Because he felt bad ta think about it. For him, there wasn't any way but ta tell th' truth. "Stole dem."

"Ah thought ya weren't good with computers." It was all th' protest Ah could think of. Especially since Ah couldn't stop lookin' at th' damn things. Runnin' my fingers over th' destination name. God. Hard ta concentrate when there's an infinity of white sand an' turquoise water openin' up inside your head.

"Jean-Luc didn't allow any of us t' be slouches." It's kind of defensive and Ah touch his forearm quickly, just ta make sure he realizes that Ah didn't mean anythin' by it.

"Ah don't know about this..."

"Not'ing t' do 'bout it now."

"No-o. But Ah wish we'd all had a say."

He shifts his weight. "I asked John."

That left me pretty damn flat. "What? When?"

"Been t'inking 'bout dis for a while. De opportunity didn't come up 'til today."

"Does Kitty know?" Amazin' how foolish Ah felt right then. Like everyone'd been in on this thing but me.

"Non. Wouldn't have asked John but it's just dat...didn't know how t' ask you. Dat's all."

That's everythin'. We'd been through so much up ta then, but it made me wonder. Like a deep hole opened up. Small at th' top. Ah wanted ta see th' bottom without fallin' in. Ah was done with fallin' in. Realized Ah was still tracin' patterns on th' tickets, like there was braille there Ah could read or somethin'. "Ah don't want ta make this a bigger deal than it has ta be. Not between us," Ah told him honestly. "Ah don't want ta make everything into such a fucking tragedy."

Ah cain't even say how relieved he looked right then. He scooped me up, liftin' me until only th' tips o' my toes were touchin' th' floor. Reflexively, Ah folded my powers inside. Even by then, with months o' practice, Ah could still feel 'em like some frantic bird inside a cage. Ah'd learned quick that if Ah kept 'em in too long it made me sick. Like th' world tilted. Like th' hangover from hell.

Remy tickled my neck with his nose. His breath was hot behind my ear. Ah angled my head an' grazed th' top of his ear with my teeth. There aren't words for what happened next. Muddy. Damp. Back hard on th' floor. We're together an' it's like sensory confetti. His breath on my face an' he'd been suckin' on a tic tac. His breath on my thighs an' Ah forgot how ta make words into sentences.

Shake. Slick. Heat. Coiled. Flutter. Change. Fall.

Ah love the way he fits, just so, inside my hips. How my legs can go up around him an' hold him still as long as Ah want. Ah've wanted this, what Ah have now. Th' way everythin' goes together. Everythin' we can do together when th' bird's caught up inside my chest. Naked from th' waist down, th' linoleum was cold against my skin. Self-conscious, Ah half-raised an' tugged at his shirt, pullin' it up until it snarled with his nylon rain jacket. Frustrated, Ah let out a tiny growl an' ripped.

There are two hollows right below his hipbones, under his waistband. His skin tasted windblown and slightly dirty. He jumped under my tongue.

He stole it. A slice o' paradise for a week. For us. Ah kissed him hard, our teeth bumped. My hand wandered.

* * *

De first t'ing dat happened was dat Kitty got airsick.

Good t'ing de girl had de aisle seat because I'd never actually seen anyone turn quite dat shade of green before.

John rubbed her back in small circles.

"Don't touch me," she moaned miserably.

"Sorry. Sorry." He looked at me helplessly, but all I could do was shrug. Which was about de moment dat Rogue finished digging t'rough her carry-on bag, coming out wit' a box of Dramamine. Looked t' me like someone'd been chewing on de box by mistake, but de way Kitty looked at Rogue you'd t'ink she was Ed McMahon wit' de whole prize patrol behind her. "Here." John passed her de last of his water. "You're not suppose ta drink that lavatory rubbish."

Kitty popped de pills and chased dem wit' de water, sitting back into her seat and closing her eyes in a way dat showed she was determined t' fall asleep and not wake up for a long time.

Dat's how much our lives had shrunk. Dis was high drama. I sighed. Felt ungrateful t' look de gift horse in de mouth. Considering how many times I'd hoped for somet'ing like dis coming up. Stability. De pleasure of waking up on Sunday's wit' Rogue's hair tangled across my arm. She was wearing it longer. Spending de morning in bed, trading sections of de paper. John and Kitty arguing over pancake fillings in de kitchen. My favorite was banana, like Kitty, but John was partial t' apple, mango sometimes if he was feeling ambitious and de mango lady was around.

But...

Heard dat one coming a mile away, right? But. Not'ing else. Dere's a world behind dat word. Longing and imagination. Y' spend life waiting and training and doing t'ings one way and den, suddenly, y' have t' up and change into a private citizen. Enough t' make a man's head spin.

John tapped my temple. "Earth ta Captain LeBeau."

"Jerk."

"Dearest?" He laid his head on my shoulder. "I'm under strict orders not ta let you introspect yourself ta death on this trip. Have I thanked you properly?"

"Last night," I replied idly.

"Smashing."

"Whose orders?"

John jerked a thumb toward Rogue across de aisle. She was craning her neck t' see past her seatmate and out de window. Headphones on. Tinny leak of sound. Oblivious. Lately, dere was a twist of envy in John. Y' felt it like static electricity in de air. When he was around, I tried not t' touch Rogue since dat only seemed t' make it worse. He and Kitty...don't know what happened exactly. Mebbe it's only in de movies dat two people can disagree and love each other. Real life needs more harmony dan dat. But she still hung around.... Couldn't see de logic dere. Shook my head. Wasn't my mess t' sort out.

"Penny for 'em," John said, startling me. He chuckled. "Wouldn't take ya by surprise if ya'd keep your mind from wandering."

"Just t'inking."

"Ya do enough of that for an army of philosophers."

"Quantity and quality aren't de same t'ing."

"Right."

Of course it stood t' reason dat once t'ings were finally settling down wit' Rogue, t'ings wit' John would go off. At least wit' her dere was a discernible event. Wasn't John's character t' be so moody and withdrawn.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Just did." When he smiled, it seemed hollow.

"Another t'ing."

"Shoot."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"Bullshit."

"Swear. Nothing."

"What happened wit' Kitty?"

"That's two things."

"True."

Rogue, headphones still on, turned away from de window and gave us a small wave. At dat moment, felt like me and John were 'bout a million miles away from her. We waved back.

* * *