This is my first story ever. It's a song fic. I don't own any characters you recognize or the Bon Jovi song.
Ranger POV
I have more secrets than there are stars in the night sky. Most are because of my government work, but there are two that no one at Rangeman knows. No, it's not that I love Stephanie Plum. Most of the Rangeman employees love her. That isn't a secret. My secret has been a blessing and a curse. It's a blessing because it gives me peace and a curse because I don't share it with anyone. I've never mentioned this to anyone, but I play the piano and I can sing. The fact I can sing was a surprise as much to me as to everyone in the karaoke bar years ago. One night, before I joined the Military, I was drinking heavily with my choice of friends for the night. We stumbled into the bar on karaoke night and they dared me. At the time, a dare was not something you backed away from, no matter what. The next thing I know, I'm on stage with a microphone in my hand and the song starts playing. The first words pop up on the screen and I start singing. The bar gets very quiet and everyone is listening to me. I see an older woman who looks like she's about to cry, when she gave me small shy smile, but her eyes encouraged me to continue. When the song ended, the bar exploded in applause. I wasn't expecting that. I smiled at the woman and she gave me a subtle head nod. When I got back to the table, my friends looked at me and were stunned. They gave me grief about it, but I just turned it back to them and challenged them to sing in front of everyone. They didn't take the bait.
Years later, here I am in this little hole in the wall piano bar way outside of Trenton. I told Tank I was off line for the night. I have been visiting this bar often since I moved to Trenton. I sat behind the piano and started playing.
Playing piano is not a secret to my grandmother. She was the one who insisted I needed to do something more productive with my time as I was a bit of a wild child in my youth. I made a deal with her. I told her I would take the lessons and practice, but she wasn't allowed to tell anyone in the family or her friends. No one can know. Surprisingly she agreed. I guess she felt if it would keep me out of trouble, then it's a good deal.
Sometimes I would sing, other times I just played. This night I decided to sing. I happened to hear this song while walking by Lester's cubicle a few weeks ago. I was shocked to hear the words that described how I felt about Stephanie. I was more shocked to find out that Bon Jovi sang it. I never paid much attention to rock music, but after hearing this song, I started doing some research. I found some very interesting songs from the metal hair bands of the eighties and nineties.
So here I am, sitting behind the piano, without paying any attention to the bar patrons and I barely whisper, "This is for you, Babe. Always."
When I finished, the crowd clapped and whistled. I played a few more songs and waved to Tom, the bartender on my way out the door. I drove toward Rangeman, but ended up at Stephanie's apartment. When I looked up at her apartment window, I was shocked to see a light on and her shadow pacing in the living room. Usually she's with Morelli at night.
Stephanie's POV
"Cupcake, why don't we go to Atlantic City and elope this weekend?" Joe said.
"You can't be serious, Joe. My mother would be ironing for the entire Burg if we eloped. Besides, Grandma Bella would give me the eye and I'd end up bald or something."
"Steph, what's the real reason you don't want to get married." Joe asked.
I had been thinking about this for a while now. I think Joe knew that. After taking a few moments, I said, "I'm not ready. I haven't done everything I want to do yet. I still need to spread my wings and fly. I don't feel like I've grown up enough, done enough with my life to settle down yet".
Joe looked at me and sighed. He said, "I don't think I can wait anymore. I am ready for marriage and kids. I want them and I want them now. I am not trying to make you feel bad or hurt you in any way, but I need to let you go. I will always love you Stephanie, but I just can't wait for you anymore. I'm sorry."
"I get it. I'm not mad. I will always love you too, but right now we want different things. I really hope you find that special woman to give you all the things you want and need. I'm sorry I'm not her. I wish I was, but I'm not, at least not right now." Having said that, I went upstairs and started to pack my things. I didn't have much there, the usual laundry basket full of clothes, make-up and a few other personal items. As I came down the stairs, I saw Joe sitting on the couch. We looked at each and smiled. He started to get up to walk towards me, but I stopped him with my hand. "Don't, please. I'm holding it together, but I won't if you hug me." He nodded and opened the front door for me. I turned around, put my hand to his cheek and said "I'll see you around." As I walked away, I had to make myself not look back. I got in my POS car and drove away. I started towards my apartment, but decided I needed some down time. A couple of weeks ago, I found this small piano bar outside of Trenton. I needed to sit and evaluate my life where nobody knows my name. I had been was sitting in dark corner in the back for about 30 minutes, when I felt a familiar tingle. That can't be. Ranger would be here. Maybe he tracked me. The next thing I see is Ranger sitting at the piano playing like he's in his own world. I am sitting in the back with the speaker to the microphone at the piano is just above me. I hear the softest whisper "This is for you, Babe. Always." Then Ranger starts playing one of my favorite songs by Bon Jovi. When he starts singing, I start crying.
This Romeo is bleedin'
But you can't see his blood
It's nothing but some feelings
That this old dog kicked up
It's been rainin' since you left me
Now I'm drowning in the flood
You see I've always been a fighter
But without you I'll give up
I can't sing a love song
Like the way it's meant to be
I guess I'm not that good anymore
But babe, that's just me
I will love you baby
Always
And I'll be there forever and a day
Always
I'll be there till the stars don't shine
Till the heavens burst and the words don't rhyme
And I know when I die you'll be on my mind
And I'll love you always
Now your pictures that you left behind
Are just memories of a different life
Some that made us laugh, some that made us cry
One that made you have to say goodbye
What I'd give to run my fingers through your hair
Touch your lips to hold you near
When you say your prayers try to understand
I've made mistakes I'm just a man
When he holds you close, when he pulls you near
When he says the words you've been needin' to hear
I wish I was him with these words of mine
To say to you till the end of time
That I will love you baby
Always
And I'll be there forever and a day
Always
If you told me to cry for you, I could
If you told me to die for you, I would
Take a look at my face
There's no price I won't pay
To say these words to you
I will love you baby
Always
And I'll be there forever and a day
Always
Well there ain't no love in these loaded dice
But baby if you give me just one more try
We can pack up our old dreams and our own lives
We'll find a place where the sun still shines
I will love you baby
Always
And I'll be there forever and a day
Always
I'll be there till the stars don't shine
Till the heavens burst and the words don't rhyme
And I know when I die you'll be on my mind
And I'll love you always
Always
I heard the last words of the song and quietly slipped out the door. Now I really needed to think.
I brought my stuff up to my apartment and started pacing in the living room. What did Ranger mean by that song? Who else knows he can play piano and sing? OMG he has an amazing voice. Jeez, if Rangeman had a singing competition, I would bet on Ranger. Why doesn't he say anything? Right, Stephanie. It's Ranger. His reputation would be in shreds if people found out. UGH. Now I know a secret and I can't tell anyone. Not one person, not even Ranger. He'd realize it was about him the second I said anything. What do I do? Does he love me? Yes, but in his own way. What does that mean? I started to think about Ranger and his life. I know he's not celibate, but he's never mentioned a long term girlfriend before. Not even Rachel was long term. It gave him Julie, but the marriage didn't last. So how else would Ranger love someone? The only way he knows how.
Common sense Stephanie says…Stephanie, Stephanie, Stephanie….you are dense sometimes. Ranger loves you. Think of all the things he has done for you. Think about what you want in a relationship. Doesn't he give that to you? He supports you. He may not show his emotions, but if look closely, you've seen them. Do you remember the look he gave you when he walked into your apartment when Scrog was holding you? Think about the look, his eyes. What were they saying to you?
Well, what about when he sent me back to Joe after our night together? What about that common sense Stephanie?
To that common sense Stephanie said, are you kidding me? Is he not allowed to make a mistake? He's human. Yes, he's your Batman, but if you think about everything else since the morning after, what kind of behavior do you see? He's given you cars when you needed it, let you hide in his building when you needed it, given you a job when you needed it. Who else has supported you in that way? Joe is not a bad guy, but he just doesn't understand you. Stephanie, you need to pull you head out of your…..
HEY, watch it common sense Stephanie. There is no need to be rude.
I went to my bedroom and was lying down in my thinking position when I heard the locks tumble on my front door. I heard the footsteps stop at the bedroom door. I glanced up and saw Ranger leaning against the frame with his arms crossed.
"Babe, are you ok?"
"Yes, Ranger, I'm fine"
"Looking a little crazed. Anything you want to talk about?"
Sheesh, now he wants to talk. I sat up, moved over and leaned against the head board. Ranger came over and sat facing me. I looked in his eyes, didn't say anything and really looked deep in his eyes. About a minute later I was thinking to myself, he loves me.
"Yeah, Babe, I love you."
Damn ESP. Ranger shook his head no. "Out loud?" I asked. Ranger nodded.
Ok, here it goes. "Ranger, what do you need in a relationship?"
I was expecting to hear, "my life doesn't lend itself to relationships", but instead, I heard
"Trust, Honesty, Fidelity. There are more, but…. What about you?"
"The same things actually. Um, so when you say you love me in your own way, what do you mean by that?"
"Babe, why aren't you at Morelli's?"
"We broke up."
"Why?" Ranger asked
"He asked me why I didn't want to get married, and I told him. It was a very civil break up. I'm not what he needs. So we called it quits, again. You never answered my question."
Ranger looked at me for a moment and said "I love you the only way I know how in my own way. I help you when you need or want it, I support you when you need or want it and I look out for you, not because you need or want me to, but because, if something were to happen to you, I would be lost without you." He paused, then said "There's a song I want you hear. Will you listen to it for me?"
"I know Ranger." He looked at me like I was crazy. "Where were you before you came here?" I asked.
"You were there, weren't you? You heard the song? I felt you there, but apparently I wasn't very aware of my surroundings."
"I listened to you sing, I saw you play the piano and I heard the whispered words before you started. I love you Ranger."
I love you too, Babe."
The End