Don't even tell me where we are going
Hands over my eyes, hands over my eyes
Don't even tell me where we are going
Just walk, just walk, just walk, just walk by my side
A Foreword on RODEO RIDE TOUR
I was confused at the title of "Rodeo Ride Tour," the phrase being untranslatable in terms of colloquial understanding to English. Was Sheena saying her life was as wild as a rodeo? With, like, cows runnin' around waiting to be caught? And then I realized her voice actress wasn't saying "rodeo" so much as she was saying "Rodeo." Roh-DAY-oh.
Like the way aesthetes pronounce the ballet by Copland and de Mille, which I studied a bit in college; wherein, and I shit you not, the main character is a tomboyish "Cowgirl" (Sheena) trying to get the affection of the "Head Wrangler" (main character Lloyd) but he's totally more into the "Rancher's Daughter" (subdued Colette). She makes a fool of herself trying to get his attention and does the opposite of what the Rancher's Daughter would do. The Cowgirl then finds herself partnerless at the dance until the "Champion Roper" (Um, hi, Zelos; especially in the part where he's trying to impress all the ladies and falls on his ass) approaches her and she realizes she's not quite as alone as she thought.
So, I'm adopting this American pop culture idea and applying it to what is otherwise a typical Japanese are-they-or-aren't-they romance. Much of the dialogue can stick around, but I've modified phrases to be more in line with the English script. I'm just gonna fill in a few holes to make the whole thing more… digestible. Sincerely. I love Japanese works, but they lack something when it comes to understanding why, exactly, these two are drawn to each other.
And it seriously doesn't help that in the '73 ABT version, the Wrangler and the Roper are both wearing red, and the Daughter's wearing white with blue accents. I think that costuming was my "aha" moment. It was the moment I knew I needed to make this work, no matter how long it would take me.
Where "Rodeo" is a bit of a stretch for a theme, Walk the Moon's "Fixin'" is less of a stretch for representing the voice of Zelos on this journey. There isn't a line I'd question in terms of whether it applied. The lyrics of this song guide me but not in such a limiting way as the outdated "songfic." At least, I hope. There is much to be said when a fanfic is supported by distinguished artistic media! (Can you tell I have a liberal arts education yet?) Aaaaaand now you have the lens with which to fully enjoy my speculations. Congratulations on our PS3 bundle, y'all!
1. A GLIMPSE
He'd been planning for some time to make his great escape. Trouble was, every time he was resolved to leave for good, it seemed like his little sister came down with a flu that nearly brought her to death's door. And so, he'd set out from his mansion in the dead of night to make a trip to the South East Abbey, stay with her until she was well, and leave before she realized how long he'd been there. This would have been about the seventh time.
The Exsphere just wasn't working for Seles. And on top of that, Lloyd was making a concentrated effort to punish anyone who owned an Exsphere, even going so far as to destroy them. The clear solution, then, was to hide the Cruxis Crystal with Seles and high-tail it back to Meltokio before anyone figured out he wasn't there. Would've been so much more convenient to just take her back with him, "but Zelos," she'd whine, "all my stuff is here!"
By some stroke of luck, being out of town to exchange his Cruxis Crystal allowed him to avoid the attack upon the Wilder Estate. Someone, some strange person leaving the moniker of "Bomb Wizard," threw bombs over the walls to the courtyard and obliterated a section of the wall as well as most of the greenery. Sebastian was quick to order Papal Knights to guard the wall, but the vandals had fled before anyone saw them under the cover of night.
"What the hell is this?!" Zelos wailed upon seeing the damage still charring.
"Master Zelos, there appears to be a bounty on your head. I thought Papal Knights would be the wisest solution, for the time being," Sebastian explained.
"We'd better find something more long-term. They're going to be busy at Carnivale tomorrow."
One of the Papal Knights turned his head to the side and a huff of air escaped from his gilded helmet. It was no secret that the Pope hadn't been the biggest fan of the Chosen. The Knights remained loyal to the crown and the Chosen for the sole purpose of preserving the religion under Cruxis. As it were, Zelos happened to know quite a few secrets about Cruxis that could destroy the Church and undermine the whole of Tethe'alla.
Not that Zelos would commit that sort of treason. Old Zelos might have. New Zelos was busy dealing with a few more pressing matters.
"Goddamn Carnivale," he muttered.
Zelos strode back into the mansion with Sebastian scuttling, as ever, not too far behind.
"Master Zelos, are you still planning on attending the procession this evening?"
Zelos leaned against a polished counter in the kitchen. "Gotta appease my hunnies, don't I?"
Sebastian smirked. "I'll have the racing briefs picked up from the dry cleaner."
"Make sure you get some for those guys, too," Zelos gestured to the guards planted in the back courtyard. "I can't have them ruining my entourage."
Carnivale in Meltokio was campaigning to replace Martel's Day as a new worldwide celebration: a brightly-yet-minimally-clothed song and dance festival enjoyed by all. It was invented for the anniversary of the uniting of Tethe'alla and Sylvarant. You know the day; the one with the Tree. For Meltokio's particular celebration, the Church promoted a procession of the royal members down the grand steps of Meltokio as a sign of good will to all class levels within the city. Zelos's original plan had been stripping a layer of clothing upon landing on each level of the city until he was wearing just a skimpy bathing suit brief—drive the ladies wild. But now, he was thinking, all that wasn't seeming like such a good idea. It wasn't like they had practiced the procession or promised any individual protection against acts of violence.
Bombing the Wilder estate itself. In all the years he'd lived there, through all the difficulties with his mother's murder and his father's suicide, nobody had ever attacked the very property on which Zelos lived. Sebastian had been the only bodyguard he needed. You'd never guess it looking at him now, though. The years were unkind to the lines on Sebastian's face and the tone of his muscle.
It wasn't that Zelos needed a bodyguard, exactly. The Cruxis Crystal provided him with the strength and agility to subdue or evade nearly any foe. When he had it, that was. Now he was hiding his sister's Exsphere while she had the Cruxis Crystal to calm her recurrent respiratory distress. Using a plain Exsphere to bring out his abilities was like catching a whale with a cottonball. If he could, he'd just get rid of the damn Exsphere. Drop it in Lloyd's hand. Be done with it.
But Seles couldn't have the Cruxis Crystal all the time. As long as monsters still existed, he'd need it to fight them off. As long as mana still existed, actually. It was one of those theories Zelos had read about in a mathematical text. Just a little more time and he'd have explored it in detail. But it was too late. The evening of Carnivale would be upon them and no theory of math would keep another bomb from being lobbed into the right place.
"I do hope you have a backup plan in case this turns into a spectacle of martyrdom," Sebastian said, a tone of worry lining his words.
Zelos had to laugh. "You doubt me, Sebs. Already taken care of!" He waved a hand and slipped through the door frame into the study. Now, to arrange for Manuelo the gardener to make a surprise visit.
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
Orochi reread the words of the crumpled letter in his hands.
'Special enforcements will be... kinda fearing for my life a little bit... Do a guy a favor. After all, I did getcha the new job, didn't I?'
"Oh, my," Orochi muttered. He re-crumpled the letter and stared at the envelope in which it had arrived. Addressed to the Emissary of Peace, it was sealed with the Chosen's emblem and rather hastily scrawled. Since the Emissary of Peace had been busy being the Chief of Mizuho at the time, Orochi elected to open and read it.
"Chosen thinks he's got it all figured out," Orochi rationalized to no one in particular. The letter had been a request for some discreet backup during Carnivale so that the Chosen of Tethe'alla wouldn't fall victim to an attack similar to the one on his home.
Orochi was quick to use an instant-burning powder to vanish the letter into thin air.
It wasn't because he was feeling more spiteful than usual. Mizuho had been building a team of specialized intelligence officers for these new situations. After all, such a resource as an Emissary connecting Tethe'alla to Sylvarant could break into an untapped market for ensuring peace and safety of the residents of the United World. It would be the Tethe'alla Mizuho Information Network that would begin to use their stealth and magic to fill that position.
The special agents of T-MIN had already been planning measures to protect the city of Meltokio from a disaster of terrorism. That fact was inevitable. A man thinking he was a "Bomb Wizard" had sent out a threatening message to them, warning of a magnificent spectacle to exceed the light of the fireworks in the sky. In other words, a direct threat on the lives of the people attending Carnivale.
Orochi and the others were behind in hearing the news about the bombing at the Wilder estate; although, according to Sheena, "that stupid Chosen could have stopped it if he wanted to." Perhaps it was the Bomb Wizard's test to arouse the curiosity and heighten the awareness of the Chosen. Or, perhaps these events were unrelated. Regardless, Sheena didn't need to know about this compounded ignorance of the Chosen, especially since she tended to show him such disregard.
"Orochi!"
The man straightened at his desk and looked expectantly at the doorway. "Yes, Chief?"
Sheena, informal as ever, strode into the room. "I'm done with that paperwork. When are we leaving for the next operation again?"
Orochi took a deep breath. "Oh, sometime in the next few hours. It's really up to you," he said quickly.
"And no news since then?" She opened a filing cabinet labeled "outgoing" in the far corner and unceremoniously stashed a stack of papers inside it.
"None, indeed."
The birds chirped outside as though someone had forgotten the town still rested in the Forest of Death.
A ring of the doorbell brought Zelos down from making the final adjustments to his costume. By the time he'd made it down the two flights of stairs, Sebastian had already let the bedazzled guest in.
"Master Zelos!"
Before the Chosen could grasp exactly which one of his hangers-on was screaming his name, she was clinging to him with her face in his shoulder. Oh, the sobbing—that was definitely Elena. The girl was a Smithton from the line of Counts, and she'd been to the Wilder estate many a time in the past. Not so much recently, though. She looked up at him with bleary eyes.
"Dear Elena," Zelos managed, "What brings you here?" He flashed a panicked look at Sebastian, who was shaking his head and turning away.
"I heard! I heard about the accident! I can't believe you're okay," she gasped through her tears.
Quite okay, Zelos straightened up. "Cheer up, there. It was nothing more than a fluke."
When Elena stopped crying, Zelos could better see her costume. She was wearing an enormous hoop skirt that showed the boning on the outside. The fabric there was sheer and showed legs painted with stripes and curls. And bursting forth from this skirt at the top was a bird. Long fabric wings, a tiny waistlet, and way more cleavage than a flying creature ought to have. Even as he stood there, he saw tiny bits of feather being tossed around in the light. Sebastian would be picking feathers from the carpet for weeks.
"But... they said there was an explosion!" she yelped.
Zelos had to think quickly. This girl was nothing if not an insufferable gossip, and already it seemed the gossip cloud was moving quickly. If the papers got a hold of this, it would be the end of his freedom for good.
"An explosion of manliness, maybe," Zelos assuaged. He took her hands gently. "I was just practicing a spell that went wrong. And I know," holding a finger up to her lips, "that I don't often make mistakes, but even such a perfect specimen as I can miscalculate very intricate equations such as magic!"
"Oh," Elena giggled. "That math stuff. I guess it can be pretty complicated."
"Exactly, my parakeet. Say, isn't it getting a bit late for you to be hangin' around here if you want a good spot for the procession?"
Elena batted her eyes. "Brittania's maid is saving our spots at the front of the overhang. I'm not worried."
This, again. "Well, I'll be sure to wave. Give my regards to the Countess."
"Aww, Chosen One, can't you come have fun with me for once?"
"I'm..." Zelos trailed, again looking to Sebastian. "Sorry, I just need some time to complete my look and get to the palace."
"You're so mean, Master Zelos," Elena whined. "Promise you'll find me after?"
He stared at her. Her crooked teeth and her pushed-up breasts and her hooker-glitter eyes. That ridiculous caged bird dress, signifying nothing. He could have said yes, he could have had her so many times before. Somehow, it didn't seem worth it. Like she could tame a wild horse, anyway. The sheer mount of things Zelos had seen in the world, the number of places he'd been—could someone like her truly be able to keep up with that? "So mean," as though she were the only focus of her life. He wondered how she'd react if he'd let the curtain down and show her the true meaning of cruelty.
It wasn't worth it. And maybe this was what kept him from the real freedom.
"Sure enough."
"Do you like my costume, at least?" Elena prompted, giving a little twirl.
He pursed his lips together and raised an eyebrow. "Ah, I see... you're supposed to be...?"
"The legendary bird, Aska!"
Zelos all but cackled. "Aska? That's... fantastic, you do look like a shimmering bird!" Compared to the real Aska, this version was muddied and cheap. Actually, it looked nothing like Aska at all, and after a moment Zelos suspected that it was a leftover costume from All Saints' Day—from the looks of the seams—about eight years ago.
"And what are you supposed to be?"
Elena was inspecting him, but there was little to inspect. He was wearing regular clothing. In fact, the only thing missing was his signature salmon surcoat. The costume he'd been working on was a mask he'd designed a few years ago that would hide both his face and his hair. This year, though, he'd have a cape to go with it, and he'd be free to roam the streets without suspicion. Albeit, part of him was still a little sad he wasn't going through with the strip idea.
"It's a surprise, you see. You'll see me around, that's for sure! But if one little tweeting bird doesn't leave this cage, I can't make my transformation complete," he soothed. He threw in a wink for good measure.
Elena smiled and curtseyed politely. "Say no more. I'll leave you to it... Master Zelos," she crooned. He would have given her a swift, emphatic pat on the back as she left through the door, but too late he realized he'd already gotten glitter on his good gloves.
He watched from a packed stairwell. When he was wearing that mask, not a single person seemed to recognize him.
It happened after the minstrels and jesters and low court and high court. It was after the princess's ladies-in-waiting dressed in little more than bikinis. It was after the Pope and the royal party and the announcers. In the corner of the sky, instead of fireworks, two giant flares grew larger and the heat beamed down on an already sweating crowd.
One of the fireballs was bright red and misty around the edges, but the other was most definitely a highly explosive bomb blast. And standing on top of the wall, hundreds of meters below, was a woman in dark robes.
Among cheers and gasps of relief, some grimy-looking man shouted, "Nice legs!"
Oh, was he lucky that the woman hadn't heard him. Zelos knew from experience that Sheena wasn't awfully keen on catcalls. It was her, right? Who else would have been able to call upon that grumpy Summon Spirit? Which means she got his message...
There it was, still smoldering in the sky. That bomb was meant for him. There was no alternative. There was nobody else who would have caught it and saved every citizen aside from Sheena.
When he looked for her again, she had gone.
Damn. The one person he'd wanted to talk to about this whole affair. How was he going to reach her now? Letters screened by her second-in-command wouldn't suffice.
Zelos didn't stick around to see the reactions of the crowd. He'd seen it already. Where could he even start? Palmacosta. Heimdall. Luin. Sure, the relief of not becoming any of those cities would be foremost, but in the back of their minds, the people would be anticipating disaster. Much as he hated what that town stood for, Meltokio was a little fragile these days. Not even the Coliseum was bringing in enough revenue to keep up with the population's needs. Before too long, it was almost inevitable that Meltokio would be replaced by a younger, fresher, newly furbished Palmacosta as the capital of the world.
Behind his eyes, he saw a glimpse of what that future could be. Palmacosta and the whole of Sylvarant would flourish, and Lloyd would be mayor of everything. Sheena would single-handedly unite both empires. Maybe it would take the pressure off. Maybe Zelos could step down as the Chosen and live out the remainder of his days in the quiet corner Meltokio could provide, hanging out at the bar and telling old war stories.
But then, maybe the people of Tethe'alla wouldn't take too kindly to sharing. There might be revolts. There might be more acts of violence by the people toward each other. More misguided acts of terror aimed at one person but murdering so many. The prisons couldn't take it. Meltokio would overcrowd, overpopulate with impoverished citizens who would grow tired of their King. They'd behead their Chosen almost doubtlessly; and while sometimes Zelos still thought that wouldn't be so bad, it meant he wouldn't be able to protect his sister. He paled.
The streets were empty in the district of the nobles and he was able to amble to the mansion freely. But there were no Papal Knights around. Sebastian wasn't waiting for him at the door as usual.
"What, did he think he could get the night off if I'd died?" Zelos thought aloud, lingering in the foyer. He looked at the shadows cast by the wall sconces; the high, vaulted ceiling; the little chairs just upstairs; the bannister and its dark wood. Even though it wasn't built just for him, he loved this house. He thought again of the terrorist's bomb in the garden. What if it had gotten closer? This fortress would be gone. There was only so much hiding he could do before being dragged out one way or another. The way he saw it, there was only one factor that made this place and everywhere he went dangerous, and that was him.
He took to the stairs calmly, making sure to glide his hand up that sturdy bannister. He used to sit on it at the top and balance as he slid all the way down, much to the disdain of his caretakers. Bah, but there were no longer any caretakers. And Sebastian had to have been running an errand.
There was a hidden panel in the back of Zelos's walk-in closet, and that's just where he found the packed rucksack he was looking for. He'd done that months ago after he'd gotten settled in from the Regeneration journey. Hypocritical, yes. After all, that Derris Emblem incident would be hard to forget, but in this day and age, and with the sharing of technology between Sylvarant and Tethe'alla bringing news of the world to the masses more readily, he had to be prepared for anything. It wasn't running away in the face of difficulty.
Don't look at me like that, you stupid half of a piece of a golden spider.
Just to be sure, he lifted the top of the rucksack and recounted his goods. Dry provisions; matches; water, water bottle, purification tablets; a small notebook in which he'd handwritten every handy spell he knew in the Angelic language to keep them secret; a couple of potion bottles, zipped in a plastic bag at Seles's instruction, and don't ask why; gels stuffed in the bottom; whetting stone; a change of clothes; that mocking, four-legged spider thing. On top of it all, he kept a blanket rolled up inside a sleeping bag. It looked pretty similar to what he carried on the Regeneration journey, although stuffed with a few more life-saving items.
There. That was it. But for now, he was keeping his mask and his costume nearby, because he was fairly certain he'd need those, too.
He looked at himself in the mirror, preened. He let the adrenaline flow, then dissipate into radiating pain. Then, he practiced that world-famous grin. "Chin up, Chosen. This could be fun. It's the vacation you always wanted," he told himself. Then, he picked up the rucksack, headed down to the kitchen to write a quick note, and set out on his errand.
About a mile from the village of Mizuho, Zelos felt a fluttering down to his fingertips. He'd been walking all night just to get there in time, seeing as he couldn't fly without the support of the Cruxis Crystal (or the missing Rheiards) and needed too much anonymity to take the usual coaches. But the feeling came not from lack of sleep.
He was going to see Sheena in her village for the first time since he'd been at her emissary ceremony. This time, he was alone, unannounced, and unexpected. Would it surprise her? Just how pissed would her Grandpa be if he found out that Zelos was here for completely unofficial business? He was crawling out of his skin.
In no time, he approached the gate to the town and greeted by a group of young girls in traditional clothing.
"Halt! Who goes there?"
Still masked, Zelos decided to play up the mystery. After all, they looked to be younger than his sister. "One who wishes to speak with the Chief of Mizuho," he said. "I would have one of you go fetch her immediately."
The girls looked at each other before one spoke up. "I'll go. Interrogate him while I inform the Chief." She trotted along the dirt path far into the village.
"You all are getting formal around here," Zelos observed.
"Don't get cute with us," one girl sneered. She wore her hair in a tight bun at the top of her head, the kind of bun you'd see on stern grandmothers.
"I don't know, you might want me to!" Zelos retorted. Oh, they'd be putty in his hands.
Another girl raised her hand to her back, preparing a knife that was sheathed there. "Just who are you and what do you want with the Chief?"
"Why," he said, now removing his mask and hat, "I'm the Great Zelos Wilder!"
At once, their sneers turned to wide-open, squealing mouths. What little hope they had of appearing professional was obliterated, and he could only hope they were as young as they sounded.
"It's him!"
"It's really you!"
"HE'S ACTUALLY HERE IN MIZUHO!"
And, all at once, the siren, "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
Uh oh.
They lunged at him—not even wishing to embrace him so much as pet him with rough and terrifying force.
"To think that you'd deign to visit us in these back woods!" the bun-headed girl gasped. "Allow me to escort you wherever you need to go!"
Before he knew it, someone's elbow was in his face.
"Don't listen to her, Chosen. I'll gladly show you around!"
"No, Chosen, I will help you during your stay!"
"What do you mean? I called him first!" the second one shouted.
"No, I did!" Bun-headed one.
"I want him more!"
"Wasn't it me first, Chosen?"
He had to admit, it was nice to have this attention. All these young, nubile bodies clambering for acknowledgment. They all quieted as he opened his mouth. "It's tough being popular. But now, my hunnies, you've gotta stop fighting with each other! The Great Zelos Wilder doesn't love you any less whether there are three or three hundred of you!"
"But Chosen, I don't want to have to share you!" the second guard whined.
"Well, aren't you forward!" the third one shouted. And just then, Zelos could feel his ribcage again, and the girls backed off to wrestle with each other instead. In the distance, Zelos could see a figure in red approaching.
"... Oh, oh, my poor heart," he improvised, more loudly than he probably should have. He clasped over his chest sweepingly.
One of them noticed. "Chosen One!"
"Oh, my, Chosen One! Are you hurt?"
"Ah! Only when I see my darling hunnies fighting. You see, my fragile heart can't take it... do you hear it cracking at the thought of you getting hurt? We gotta do this peacefully, y'know?"
Just as the girls were about to launch themselves onto him once more, a voice stopped them in their tracks.
"All right, all right! Aaaaand you're done, ladies. Yes?" Sheena struggled to tear them away both from Zelos and each other. "His idiocy is contagious, you know. Now scram! Get back to your duties like decent citizens!"
When the mess was all sorted and the girls moping back to their post, Zelos couldn't help but smile.
"Been a while," he greeted. When she didn't go crazy like the fanatics, he continued, "How 'bout that Carnivale? That was sure exciting. But for you to leave without saying hello—my fragile heart can't take it—" He imitated the scene he'd just created with the crowd of women.
"... And?" Sheena spat, not even looking him in the eye.
"... And what?"
"And what brings you here?"
"Oh, that!" Zelos laughed. Why was she being so cold...? "Well, y'see, this is the sort of thing that's best discussed over a glass of wine and some privacy..."
"Listen, if you don't have business, then I'm afraid you'll have to leave!" She crossed her arms and scowled.
"Geez, what's with you? Well, I—Actually, I just came to say hello, since you wouldn't do me the favor last night." When she didn't respond, he grasped for a reason. "… And maybe I need some advice."
There it was. "Advice?"
"Yeeeeah. It's one of those things that we should talk about out of earshot of those ones." He gestured to the girls from earlier, who had still been staring at him longingly.
Sheena's face softened. "I see. Well, let's get this over with, I guess. Follow me," she instructed. She began down the dirt path.
"We goin' to your place?"
"You should be so lucky, Zelos," she drawled. "But no, we're going to my office."
He followed her through the familiar scenery and they entered through the back to reach her new meeting room. It was an annex to the building he'd visited during the Regeneration and absent of Tiga or Sheena's grandfather. The room was Mizuho-style with special mats around the room and a thick air of seriousness. There was something strange about the door in the back, though—probably some sort of trap.
After he kicked off his shoes, Zelos stepped in. He shouldn't have been surprised to see Orochi sitting in the corner, seeing as he'd turned into some sort of bodyguard of hers. Yet there he was, legs crossed and brow furrowed. "Chosen One," he grumbled.
"Orochi. Good to see you," Zelos said through a forced grin. Meanwhile, Sheena sat in the middle of the floor.
"Well, let's talk, then!" she prompted.
Nervously, Zelos sat down. Just as he was about to protest her, his stomach did the talking. It rumbled loudly enough to fill the room. "Uhh... Sorry 'bout that. I really am hungry. Been traveling all night and all morning, you see," he explained.
Sheena looked at him, then at Orochi. "Fine. Orochi, go ahead and get this guy some of the leftovers from yesterday," she ordered.
"Yes, my Chief." Orochi rose to his feet and kept his eyes leering at Zelos until he was well out of the room.
They say tensely for a moment. Zelos was content just to gaze at her, try to figure out what was going on. Her eyes did seem a little more tired than usual—but who was he to judge? He probably needed that mask to look himself, although Meltokio might say differently. He was sure she was scrutinizing him the same way before she broke away and looked to the window.
"Well, you just looked like you weren't going to budge unless you had something," she muttered.
"What was that?" He almost hadn't caught it.
"N-nothing. If you don't want to get this over with, I'm going to get behind on my work..."
"You'll be fine," he assured.
They waited in silence for the remainder of the time it took Orochi to bring the soup, and even then, the only sound was Zelos's attempt at respectful slurping. Orochi looked a little pale returning to his corner in silence.
He stared down the last bits of the soup in its traditional bowl, then looked up at Sheena. "So, there's this trip."
"... A trip?" she repeated.
"Yep." He finished the soup with one unceremonious gulp, and set the bowl down in front of him. "Seconds?"
Sheena waved her hand in front of her face. "Forget about seconds! What do you mean, a trip? Were you thinking you were going on one?"
"What do you mean, 'what do you mean?' Nothing to mean. The trip's just a trip. Gotta make some good publicity, too," Zelos rambled. "I can see it now. Who's that guy in the papers? "The Great Chosen's Journey Across the Countries, by Friedrich Callon. A gleaming knight—no—The Chosen of Prosperity's coat of arms glitters in the sun—"
"What are you going to do about your duties?" Sheena asked, point-blank. She was sitting forward, more formally than ever.
"Duties?" he echoed. He could feel the stiff air enveloping him.
"I mean," Sheena clarified, "Even if the whole... Regeneration is over, aren't you considered to be a leader?"
"Yeah, 'considered' to be..."
"So, there are things you've still gotta do, right? Ceremonies, peace treaties, dealing with internal government, being Tethe'alla's ambassador... stuff like that? Um... you know, fighting for... what am I thinking of?" She looked sidelong to Orochi.
The second-in-command was quick to jump in. "Justice?"
"Justice! That's it," Sheena finished. "Giving the people what they need."
Zelos shifted, uncomfortable sitting on his shins. "Uh, well, you know... I do do that, and all... But even someone as energetic as I am can get tired every once in a while," he explained. "And do you really think I've done a great job as an ambassador, Sheena? You know what I'm talking about, Orochi."
Orochi coughed. "Well, it, ah... it's as you say."
"Precisely! And with Tethe'alla and Sylvarant being all united and not in need for that little human sacrifice thing, the Chosen system will be phased out forever. Right? Might as well jump ship while I still can!"
"Completely irresponsible as ever, aren't you?" Sheena snorted.
"Heh. That might be it," Zelos hinted. If by "phased out," he meant "forcefully assassinated by uninformed terrorists who simultaneously kill everyone in Meltokio," that was right. Irresponsible. Was it irresponsible to remove himself from that situation? He took a deep breath. "I mean, a lot of things will might better this way, in the end."
He saw that she was staring at him intently. "So? What, you really did just swing by to say hello before heading out?"
Without missing a beat, Zelos shouted, "Yep!"
"... And?" Sheena continued to stare at him like he was a sewer rat with the head of a goat. Or something more provincial—he guessed they didn't have as many sewers out here.
"A...and?"
"The advice," Sheena said. "That's the other thing you wanted?"
"Ohhhhhh, that advice! The advice I advised you to advise me! That advice, riiight," Zelos searched. Well, with Orochi sitting there, he was only going to get so much leverage. It'd be two-against-one no matter what was said around here because she dared not disrespect her village. But he was sitting in the corner...
"Can you come a little closer?" he asked, leaning forward.
"Um—"
"I mean, it's not something I can say out loud," he announced, tossing a look Orochi's way. He lowered his voice, "Either send out your wrong-hand man over there, or give me your ear—you choose!"
Sheena almost looked at Orochi, but instead lurched forward and offered her left ear. "All right, go ahead."
He thought about saying something actually perverted to see how she'd react. Would she keep her cool? Would Orochi, if he knew what was being said? Perhaps it would be better to goof off a little, yes. "Oh, it's just," Zelos started. Then he blew the rest of the air in his lungs straight into her ear.
Sheena didn't slap him, but she did scream, fly across the room, and guard her ear with her hand, her face entirely red.
Zelos laughed so hard he could have puked. And when that ebbed and she was still fuming, he said, "Hah! Oh, man, from the look on your face, it looks like I've found an erogenous zone—!"
"Y—you jackass!" she howled. "You're going to pay for this!" She turned the meeting table sideways and pushed it to the wall to leer over him. Before he even knew it, she'd whipped out a seal—from where?!—and had begun to chant her ancient Mizuhoan spell. This was much worse than the foot-in-the-face he'd anticipated.
"Whoa—whoa—hey! Time out! Time out! I-won't-do-it-again-I-promise—SHEENA!" He fell to his side to curl up in a protective ball, still suppressing laughter. "Sorrysorrysorrysorry, I said I'm SORRY! I surrender!" At that point, the card was gone, but Sheena was still looming and poised to strike. Man, she was pretty when she was angry. And if she was that angry, did it mean there was a grain of truth, there? Only one way to find out.
"... wow, you really can't take a joke!" he muttered, sitting back up.
"GET. TO. THE POINT," she demanded.
Zelos looked at Orochi, who was sitting bemusedly. "Fine, fine, the point is... It's not really advice, more like company. Wanna join me?"
"J... join you."
"On the trip!"
"The... trip? That trip?"
"Won't you please join me in my travels?" he asked, bowing slightly. There was the adrenaline again. It wasn't often he asked for something, much less from Sheena. She had to have known how difficult it was for him to get that out, right?
Sheena slowly sat down and continued to look at the floor.
"Don't make that face," he rambled. "When I say 'trip' I don't mean something short and definite. We could head north, or go wherever the wind takes us. Doesn't even matter. We could find a nice spot to relax at the hot springs, or go eat the day's catch at the coast! Seriously, eat until we puke and drink the local potion 'til we die! Doesn't that sound like the best time of your life? We should just go have some fun, y'know?"
Sheena's flabbergasted stare revealed thoughts between are you kidding me and didn't you get this out of your system in your party days.
"I could go by myself, but it just wouldn't be the same without my number one hunny. Imagine poor old me, far from home and all alone," he sang pitiably. "Come onnnnn, it isn't like you to be so quiet when I'm talking like –"
It wasn't Sheena, but Orochi who rose to his feet. "I've had enough. You must leave," the disciple ordered. Though his tone was even, his hands gripped his hips tensely. Zelos had to admit that he didn't remember anyone standing over him like this since his father was alive. Wasn't like anyone would hold him accountable.
"Chosen One," Orochi continued. "Immediately."
Zelos took his time to stand and meet Orochi eye-to-eye (although Zelos's eyes were undoubtedly a few inches higher up than the Mizuhoan's). "Well gee, what's got your panties in a bunch? Feelin' feisty today, are we?"
Sheena sat motionless atop the woven mats, not tearing her eyes away from the floor.
"Unlike some leaders I know, the Chief of Mizuho has a strong sense of responsibility," Orochi spat through bared teeth.
Zelos felt a spike of excitement. Orochi kind of resembled his brother when he got angry, didn't he? "Hah! Strong sense of responsibility," he implied. Some responsibility Kuchinawa had. "So what? It's not like I need you to tell me what Sheena's like. I know her from head to toe! And I really mean that, by the way." Zelos leaned forward and wrought his mouth into a contemptuous grin.
"I cannot allow you to disgrace Sheena that way!" Orochi shouted. From thin air, he drew two fists full of throwing knives.
Zelos popped his sword up from its hilt with his thumb, coolly as ever. "I can't wait until she sees your true colors, you—"
"ENOUGH!"
Sheena had slammed her fist to the ground and rattled the air with her voice. It was enough for Orochi to retreat his weapons momentarily.
"Zelos," she continued, "I get what you're trying to say."
"Oh, good! Glad to see we're done here," Zelos eagerly replied, freeing his hand from his sword and waving it in the air.
"But how can you call yourself a man?"
As Sheena's head lifted, Zelos connected a confused look. "Wh... what...?"
"I can't say I comprehend what it means to be the Chosen. You didn't choose the burdens that come with that title. But what I don't get," Sheena paused, "I don't get how you keep wanting to throw it away. When are you going to learn that the people of the world still need you, especially now?! How long is it going to take for you to do your duty?"
Boy, didn't she know how to hit below the belt. Zelos could feel his ears burning, but bless that red hair for keeping his secret. Coming from anyone else, that line would have meant nothing. But here he was, sitting in the very place of her business goings-on, feeling very small under the hostile eyes of Orochi. Had it come down to this already?
Being held accountable wasn't something Zelos had anticipated. Even Sebastian let him get away with near-murder and tossed it out with a joke and a knowing look. Perhaps some weight sat in what Lloyd had to say when it came to responsibility—especially considering how trusting Lloyd was able to be in the face of betrayal itself. But when Lloyd spouted justice and righteousness and loyalty and all the other stuff, it was just that: spouting. Not really from a place of analysis or experience. But Sheena...
And who the hell was she to talk? The one who ran away from Volt? Were we forgetting this, here? Zelos tried to clamber his way up the slippery slope of ill logic. It wouldn't make him feel strong within the confines of this city. There was that old tug.
"If you wanna call yourself a man, you'd better get your act together and take a hold of your future already!"
He stared past her head like a schoolboy.
Well, fine, then.
"My bad! Can't believe I'd fall for that. So uncool, right?" he laughed through his mask. He about-faced and headed for the too-low-for-foreigners door. "I'll be outta your hair. Maybe I'll bring you back a souvenir. Y'know, you should keep an eye out while you're on duty!"
He was almost gone when he heard a small, porcelain, "You think... a souvenir...?" So he looked back, really hoping he wouldn't see her expression.
"I just don't have the guts. Not cut out for it. So good luck to you; do your best."
Again with his back to her, he heard her continue: "I do my best without being told. I'm not like you."
Zelos paused and considered fighting it, but she was right. And if she wasn't going to help him get through this, then let her stay. He showed himself out, barely muttering a farewell; embarrassed, raw, exhausted.
But the great escape had to begin somewhere.
Special thanks, as always, to WingedDancer for the translation of Rodeo Ride Tour!