Author's note: just thought this was a fun idea
Disclaimer: I don't own this song or Star Trek
In Jim's defense he honestly had no idea the affect chocolate had on Spock and even if he had, come on who could have seen that coming.
It was the day after valentines, Jim and Spock sat down for a game of chess in Jim's private quarters. Jim offered Spock one of the many, many chocolates he had received. At first Spock stiffened but soon relaxed and took a chocolate, soon one had turned into the whole box and out of nowhere Spock got up and started to dance and sing. If that's not enough on it's own it was what he was singing.
"When you got it, flaunt it
Step right up and start your stuff
People tell you modesty's a virtue
But in the theater modesty can hurt you."
At this point Jim didn't know if he should laugh or scream.
"When you got it, flaunt it
Show your asses, let them know you're proud
Your goodies you must push
Stick you'r chest out, shake your tush
When you got it, shout it out loud"
Definitely leaning towards scream, maybe he should call Bones.
"Now Spock dance"
Jim started slowly walking to his terminal in the corner of the room.
"When you got it, show it
Put your hidden treasures on display
Violinists love to play an E-string
But audiences really love a G-string"
Spock had his shirt off and Jim refuses to admit that he screamed like a little girl.
"When you got it, shout it
Let the whole world here what your about
Clothes may make the human
All a Vulcan needs is a tan
When you got it, let it hang out
Remember when Spock dance?"
"Yes" Jim squeaked.
"Spock dance again"
Almost to the terminal.
"When I was just a little boy on Vulcan
My thoughtful mother gave me this advice
If nature blesses you from top to bottom
Show this top to bottom don't think twice"
At this point Spock grabbed him and pulled him over to the sofa, Damn! So close, Spock sat on the table.
"Now Spock belt, don't think twice"
Jim was now terrified and plastered into the corner of the sofa.
"When you got it, share it
Let the public feast upon your charms
People say that being prim is proper
But every show girl knows that prim will stop her"
Jim will never admit that at this point he had curled up in a ball.
"When you got it, give it
Don't be selfish give it all away"
If anyone asked he would never admit that he was sobbing and begging for his fist officer back.
"Don't be shy, be bold 'n' cute
Show the boys your birthday suit
When you got it, if you got it
Once you got it, shout out, hooray"
At this point Spock collapsed into the chair and fell asleep.