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River of Dreams
Spirit Fantasy
Summary: Chihiro, a free-spirited girl, finds herself back in the Spirit World... But seems to be against her, considering that the first thing she sees is Haku, and his fiance... C x H
Disclaimer: Spirited Away belongs naught to me, and this poem, Time Does Not Bring Relief, belongs to Edna St. Vincent Millay.
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'The memories of dancing in the rain were long gone, as were those tender whispers…'
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p r o l o g u e : n o r e l i e f
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Anyone there? Too scared to think aloud, her single thought reverberated in her mind, an unsaid sound, reassuring in its own right. The whites of her hazel eyes were the only light to be found in the seemingly un-endless tunnel.
"Why did I go in here?" The young teen instinctively felt her right wrist, feeling the sparkly purple hair band, using it to tie up her thick auburn hair, a nervous habit. The purple band was soothing, when you looked closely at it, you could see it was handmade, but Chihiro had no clue who made, and couldn't remember getting it in the first place...
"Daddy, are we lost?" Snapping herself out of the trace-like state, Chihiro ignored the little girl's voice.
She had ignored that voice for five years.
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Time does not bring relief; you all have lied
Who told me time would ease my pain!
I miss him in the weeping of the rain;
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Trying to summon up the most soothing memory she could, Chihiro could only think of one thing... Dancing in the rain.
She could almost imagine the steady rhythm of the cool salt-water licking the contours of her face. The distant voices of concerned friends calling her to come back inside, but the pleas would always drown out with the silent chaotic din of those whispers. "Come back..." Water was soothing; it was her confidante, Chihiro never felt silly when she wanted the rain to come so she could just dance in it, never felt scared when thunder and lightning danced in the skies, illuminating her pale, ethereal face, the steady lightning danced with her becoming a rhythm that she couldn't escape.
On her own accord, Chihiro could feel her feet moving towards a small light. Stopping at the edge of the tunnel, she saw it, a thousand colored lights, almost spirit-like, hung around a beautiful ship, Chinese lanterns hung beautifully on it. The faces of the people couldn't be seen, as the ferry headed almost nowhere.
"...Come back, we miss you..."
And her distinctive eyes, who many people called her best feature, became hazy once more, and the teen's eyelids fluttered shut, grasping the gentle command, trying to etch it in the mind... Only to find it gone the next second, and the urge to keep moving greater...
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I want him at the shrinking of the tide;
The old snow melts from every mountain-side,
And last year's leaves are smoke in every lane...
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Moving closer, almost enchanted with the pretty light reflected on the small ripples in the water, Chihiro let her feet dangle in the water, let the soothing coldness numb away her fears and concerns.
"I'll only stay a minute," she whispered looking up at the moon hanging in the sky. Lighting up the night with a white light, so much brighter than anything Chihiro saw at home, so much more enchanting.
"The moon shines brighter here..."
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But last year's bitter lover must remain
Heaped on my heart, and all my old thoughts abide.
There are a hundred places where I fear...
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Out of the corner of Chihiro's eyes, the teen walked towards something, in the distance.
It's just two people making out... her mind chastised.
Out of line, Chihiro moved closer, willing her klutzy feet to be graceful for once so that the two didn't see her. Vaguely, she could make out black hair, almost green-like obscure the guy's face. The robe that the guy wore was loose, and immaculate, moving magically to match the wearer's movements, it gleamed in the moonlight. Chihiro had yet to find a cloth finer than the one the kimono was made out of.
Wanting to go closer for a better peak, her abundant hair suddenly came out of her ponytail, flailing around her face for a second before Chihiro fell to the soft ground.
She didn't notice the couple hastily break apart and look at her through wide eyes. She didn't notice the girl look at her through ruby red eyes, glaring.
"Chihiro?" The voice was soothing and strong, reminding her off the comforting whispers that the rain brought. The voice that she longed to hear during a boring school day, the sound that she wished the guy she was currently dating had.
Looking up, so that her hazel eyes, Chihiro practically melted in those emeralds.
Something was welling up in the throat, welcoming the sounds of a thousand shards - the pieces of her broken heart, each shard filled with scars, her eyes were filled with tears. "Haku?" It was barely a whisper, almost inaudible, but still the dragon heard it.
"...I promise we'll meet again..."
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To go, --- so with this memory they will brim.
And entering with relief some quiet place
Where never shone his foot and shone his face...
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Standing up on wobbling feet, Chihiro ran her auburn hair flying in the wind, and her purple hair tie glowing on her wrist. Please, let me be anywhere, anywhere but here. She felt like she was falling, about to be forgotten.
She knew at that moment that she would fall into oblivion, with no one to catch herm to smile and take away the tears. The soothing whispers were gone, the summers spent dancing in the rain, an angel in all her glory, were erased. And her mind was filled with memories of him and only him...
"Don't be afraid, I just wanna' help you..."
"My name is the Kohaku River..."
"I have known you since you were very small..."
"Thank you..."
And Chihiro wanted Fate to let her keep falling, to let her hair whip around her face, and let the tears flow like rivers down her pale cheeks. She had no one to catch her, and she didn't care. The pain was too much, and her heart would never be the same again.
Which was why she didn't fight when the memories of this world came hurdling fast, hitting her with everything.
And when she looked at the moon with tears shining on her face, and her heart untended, she smiled. She was going to be forgotten by her family, and friends, and the dark abyss, the scary oblivion looked welcoming.
She didn't dare fight the impending darkness.
The moon shines brighter here...
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I say, "There is no memory of him here!"
And so strand stricken, so remembering him...
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Note: I can't believe I did this in an hour's work after an extreme muse hit me! Anyways, I hope you like this. Just so you know, inspiration comes sporadically… so don't expect something so soon…