Kono Do'aho
by Aki Midori
Rating: PG
Pairing: *grin*
Warnings: Madness, as usual, from yours truly ^__^
Genre: Humor
Author's Blahs:
Just trying my luck with this new crazy plot. *grin**grin* *gleam**gleam* Don't worry... I'll still continue writing Celibacy. I just want to add this.
DiScLaimErS: Standard disclaimers apply. Bwahahahaha!!!
----------------------
Kono Do'aho
Chapter One: Desperate
Desperate.
That's what I am right now.
I tried every possible thing there is to try, did every possible thing there is to do, said every possible word there is to say, but Rukawa Kaede still looked at me as if I'm a ghost. I wanted to cry out loud.
But then again... maybe I could just drown myself into a Double Decadence Chocolate Sundae with Triple Hot Fudge.
Which is what I'm doing now.
And Koshino... Hiro-kun... my perpetually scowling best friend was too busy ranting his head off about things which I don't give a damn about. My heart's too battered and broken to listen to him right now. I want to die.
*sniff*
"You. Are. So. Stupid!" Koshino nearly growled. I decided to ignore him. After all... I *am* stupid. But hey, is it my fault that I'm head-over-heels in love with Shohoku's ace, Rukawa Kaede? I mean, I didn't do anything wrong, right?
Right?
Oh well... it's not as if I wanted to wear a skirt and do the hoola in front of Shohoku's gym, but hey, I really, really, really, really wanted to get Kae-chan- okay, I'm getting too fancy here- Rukawa-kun's attention. I'm desperate, dammit! What's a guy to do?
I tried everything!
Oh... I said that already...right?
Yeah, I did.
I tried everything already, but Rukawa-kun still won't pay attention! He still won't look at me! He still won't love me!
*sniff* *sniff*
So I went over to Shohoku, wore a pink skirt and danced the hoola dance. Screw pride. Screw everything. At least I finally got his attention.
Lemme play the scene in my mind once again...
He was walking out of the gym along with his team mates. He was wearing his usual blue shirt and white shorts. His whole yummy body was glistening with sweat and I suddenly wanted to wipe it off for him. He was silent as usual, while his team mates were chatting casually. He was walking beside Sakuragi Hanamichi.
And then I turned the music on.
He looked at me.
And I shook my hips and danced.
Everyone laughed.
He stared.
And finally...
"Do'aho," he said.
He noticed me!
And I was sooooo happy!
Finally! He noticed me! It was just a simple word, yeah, but well, he still noticed me! I'm sooooo glad!
"Oi, baka, are you listening to me?" Hiro-kun practically growled. What was he saying, anyway?
I decided to ask him the same question... and earned a square hit in the face.
"You weren't listening, goddamn you!" Hiro-kun growled. Ouch, I'm telling you, ouch! This man could very well be a pro-wrestler or a boxer or something. It hurts, dammit!
"Come on, Hiro!" I whined. "Aren't you feeling sorry for me? I'm heartbroken!"
"Heartbroken, my ass," Hiro-kun snapped. "You deserve that. You honestly think that Rukawa would fall in love with a baka hentai like you? Give me a break, Akira! What the hell has gotten into you? Have you no... no... pride? Might I remind you that you are the ace of Ryonan. Everyone respects you! Everyone looks up to you! What the-"
Blah, blah, blah. Talk all you like, you overgrown meanie. It won't change a thing. What's done is done. Past is past. Ne?
*Sigh*
He never noticed me outside the court before this. Well, actually, he would never notice anyone unless this person is holding an orange ball. He'd only look at me whenever we're playing, or whenever he'd give me one of those 'I'd beat you' glares. I want much more than that. I want him to talk to me. I mean, *really* talk to me. I want him to look at me. I want him to smile at me.
I want to be his friend.
I want to be his everything.
But perhaps I'm asking for too much.
Ah hell... What a life.
"You're not listening!" Hiro-kun shouted again, interrupting my musings about the cruelties of life.
"Give me a break, Hiro-kun," I muttered.
"Give you a WHAT?!" Hiro-kun exclaimed. "Here I am, lecturing you about your manners and decorum as the ace of Ryonan, and you tell me to give you a goddamn break?! Sendoh Akira, what is your problem, anyway?"
"I am in love with Rukawa Kaede, that's what," I replied.
Hiro-kun blinked. "But WHY?!"
I blinked back. Is this man stupid or what? "You don't ask a person *why* he falls in love with someone," I replied.
He blinked again. "But WHY?!"
Poor guy. Probably lost. He has to fall in love. He has to get laid. I sighed. "You just love a person for who he or she is. No questions asked." Hey! That's a meaningful statement! Hooray for Sendoh Akira! Dr. Love! *That* would put Hiro-kun in his place!
"Sendoh, are you sick?" he asked.
Now what? I give him one of my most profound statements and he asks me if I'm sick? Now who's the bigger idiot? Now, now. I'll ignore this hotheaded friend of mine for a while.
I have to think of a way to make Kae-chan- er- Rukawa-kun fall in love with me. Okay... maybe that's too farfetched. He'll have to notice me first. Without a basketball, of course.
Think, think, think, Sendoh Akira!
"O-re-wa-ten-sa-i!"
Huh? What was the self-proclaimed tensai doing here?
"Sa-ku-ra-gi!"
People gave Sakuragi-kun a diry glare as he stomped down to an empty booth.
"Oi! Kitsune! Hurry up, will ya!" he hollered. My handsome ears perked. *HE'S* here?!
And in he strolled.
A god, that's what he is. He walked with perfect grace. He practically glowed. Oh, I love him!
I stood up and waved, but he didn't even look at me. My heart broke again. He just walked over to that hollering Sakuragi, bonked him on the head, uttered a small 'do'aho' and sat down.
He ignored me again.
"Did you see that, Hiro-kun?" I whined. "He ignored me again! Oh, how painful it is for me! The agony! Sweet torture!"
*Bonk!*
My bestfriend actually hit me again.
"Itai!"
"Quit being such a whiner, Sendoh," Hiro-kun snapped. "Stand up! Fight for what you believe in! Be a man!"
Be a... man?
*THAT* coming from this ever-complaining wimp?
Wow! Heaven must be in a good mood today!
"So, what am I gonna do, Hiro-kun?" I asked eagerly. He might have some useful suggestions.
"I don't know," he replied with a blank face.
I should have known.
I sighed again, for the umpteenth time. I looked over to Rukawa's table. He was busy uttering insults to the uncontrollable Sakuragi. And again I wonder... why is it that he's always with Sakuragi-kun, anyway? They're always together. Why is it that he pays too much attention to Sakuragi? Yeah, Sakuragi's cute, but I'm cuter! Yeah, he's good in basketball, but I'm better! Yeah, he's tall, but I'm taller! Yeah, he's muscular, but I am, too! Yeah, he's sexy, but I'm sexier! Yeah, he's loud and obnoxious, and a little dense, and off-beat and a do'aho but I'm-...
...
I'm not.
...
...
"That's it!" I exclaimed. Hiro-kun almost jumped out of the table. I gave him a triumphant smile and he gave me a suspicious glare.
"Don't involve me," he simply said. I laughed.
"Oh, Hiro-kun, I have a brilliant idea!" I said happily.
"The last time you said that, I was forced to witness the most horrendous hoola dance in the entire history of mankind," he said.
"Oh, come on, best friend, humor me for a while would you?" I asked. He raised an eyebrow, silently urging me to continue. "Okay... you know that Rukawa-kun never paid too much attention to me, right?"
"I can understand why."
I ignored that remark. "Okay... earlier, when I was doing the hoola, he noticed me, right?"
"It's inevitable."
Oh, Kami-sama, please give the the strength that I needed to bear with this man's dry sarcasm.
"Okay... look at Sakuragi."
"Why would I do a juvenile thing like that?"
"Just look at him!" I snapped. He sighed and looked at Sakuragi who was laughing his head off at his own lame joke. "Well... what do you notice about him?"
"He's a moron."
"Exactly! And who's with him?"
"Rukawa."
"Exactly!" I said happily.
Hiro-kun just gave me a blank stare. "And your point is...?"
This man is just too dense! "Hiro-kun... listen to me-"
"I'm trying to."
"Would you just drop the sarcastic remarks and listen to what I have to say?" I snapped. *That* got his attention.
"Fine. What do want to say?"
"I know how to get Rukawa's attention!"
"How?"
"Well, hear me out. While I was doing, uh, *civilized* things, he wasn't paying any attention. But earlier, when I made a fool of myself, he finally noticed me! And he actually talked to me! Yeah, well, it was a cold 'do'aho', but that's a start, right? And no, Hiro, don't say anything. Lemme do the talking. Yes, where am I? Oh right... the do'aho part. And yeah, look at him now. He's hanging out with Sakuragi Hanamichi. He *always* spends his time with Sakuragi. And Sakuragi is a what? A do'aho. And earlier, I am a what? A do'aho. So that's it, Hiro-kun! Rukawa-kun *likes* do'ahos!" I ranted.
And all the while, Hiro-kun's was giving me a look which says 'You are a moron', but I decided to ignore that, too.
"Don't you see?" I asked. "The only way to get Rukawa's attention is to act like a do'aho! I'm going to act like Sakuragi Hanamichi!"
Hiro-kun said nothing.
Oh, to hell with him! I finally found out how to make Rukawa-kun love me! Let's try it out, shall we?
"Ore wa tensai!" I hollered. "Nyahahahahaha!!!"
And I could actually see him turning around to look at me! He was giving me a strange look, but hey! He's *looking* at me! Hooray!
"Oi! Kitsune! What are you looking at?!" I demanded. "Are you oh-so-dazzled by this tensai?"
I wanted to laugh. Sakuragi's eyes could have popped out from its sockets. Rukawa, as usual, was expressionless, but he's noticing me.
"I am a genius!" I hollered again. "Basketball genius! Nyahahaha!"
Hiro-kun was practically hiding under the table.
"I do not know this person," he said whilst hiding his face from the public.
"Oi, substitute!" I called out, referring to Hiro-kun, of course. "Aren't you glad that your best friend is the greatest basketball genius of Kanagawa? Nyahahaha!"
"I said, I don't know you!" Hiro snapped. He stood up and left.
Oh well...
"I'll call you later, pal!" I shouted.
I looked at Rukawa once again.
He was still staring at me.
And then finally...
"Do'aho," he muttered.
And then I knew... that I have just thought of the best plan ever!
*********
tsu.zu.ku
*********
This is crazy...
But what do you expect from me?
BTW, Celibacy chapter five will come out some time next week. Monday or Tuesday, perhaps. But no later than Tuesday... I don't want to make you guys wait any longer.
Aki ^_~
by Aki Midori
Rating: PG
Pairing: *grin*
Warnings: Madness, as usual, from yours truly ^__^
Genre: Humor
Author's Blahs:
Just trying my luck with this new crazy plot. *grin**grin* *gleam**gleam* Don't worry... I'll still continue writing Celibacy. I just want to add this.
DiScLaimErS: Standard disclaimers apply. Bwahahahaha!!!
----------------------
Kono Do'aho
Chapter One: Desperate
Desperate.
That's what I am right now.
I tried every possible thing there is to try, did every possible thing there is to do, said every possible word there is to say, but Rukawa Kaede still looked at me as if I'm a ghost. I wanted to cry out loud.
But then again... maybe I could just drown myself into a Double Decadence Chocolate Sundae with Triple Hot Fudge.
Which is what I'm doing now.
And Koshino... Hiro-kun... my perpetually scowling best friend was too busy ranting his head off about things which I don't give a damn about. My heart's too battered and broken to listen to him right now. I want to die.
*sniff*
"You. Are. So. Stupid!" Koshino nearly growled. I decided to ignore him. After all... I *am* stupid. But hey, is it my fault that I'm head-over-heels in love with Shohoku's ace, Rukawa Kaede? I mean, I didn't do anything wrong, right?
Right?
Oh well... it's not as if I wanted to wear a skirt and do the hoola in front of Shohoku's gym, but hey, I really, really, really, really wanted to get Kae-chan- okay, I'm getting too fancy here- Rukawa-kun's attention. I'm desperate, dammit! What's a guy to do?
I tried everything!
Oh... I said that already...right?
Yeah, I did.
I tried everything already, but Rukawa-kun still won't pay attention! He still won't look at me! He still won't love me!
*sniff* *sniff*
So I went over to Shohoku, wore a pink skirt and danced the hoola dance. Screw pride. Screw everything. At least I finally got his attention.
Lemme play the scene in my mind once again...
He was walking out of the gym along with his team mates. He was wearing his usual blue shirt and white shorts. His whole yummy body was glistening with sweat and I suddenly wanted to wipe it off for him. He was silent as usual, while his team mates were chatting casually. He was walking beside Sakuragi Hanamichi.
And then I turned the music on.
He looked at me.
And I shook my hips and danced.
Everyone laughed.
He stared.
And finally...
"Do'aho," he said.
He noticed me!
And I was sooooo happy!
Finally! He noticed me! It was just a simple word, yeah, but well, he still noticed me! I'm sooooo glad!
"Oi, baka, are you listening to me?" Hiro-kun practically growled. What was he saying, anyway?
I decided to ask him the same question... and earned a square hit in the face.
"You weren't listening, goddamn you!" Hiro-kun growled. Ouch, I'm telling you, ouch! This man could very well be a pro-wrestler or a boxer or something. It hurts, dammit!
"Come on, Hiro!" I whined. "Aren't you feeling sorry for me? I'm heartbroken!"
"Heartbroken, my ass," Hiro-kun snapped. "You deserve that. You honestly think that Rukawa would fall in love with a baka hentai like you? Give me a break, Akira! What the hell has gotten into you? Have you no... no... pride? Might I remind you that you are the ace of Ryonan. Everyone respects you! Everyone looks up to you! What the-"
Blah, blah, blah. Talk all you like, you overgrown meanie. It won't change a thing. What's done is done. Past is past. Ne?
*Sigh*
He never noticed me outside the court before this. Well, actually, he would never notice anyone unless this person is holding an orange ball. He'd only look at me whenever we're playing, or whenever he'd give me one of those 'I'd beat you' glares. I want much more than that. I want him to talk to me. I mean, *really* talk to me. I want him to look at me. I want him to smile at me.
I want to be his friend.
I want to be his everything.
But perhaps I'm asking for too much.
Ah hell... What a life.
"You're not listening!" Hiro-kun shouted again, interrupting my musings about the cruelties of life.
"Give me a break, Hiro-kun," I muttered.
"Give you a WHAT?!" Hiro-kun exclaimed. "Here I am, lecturing you about your manners and decorum as the ace of Ryonan, and you tell me to give you a goddamn break?! Sendoh Akira, what is your problem, anyway?"
"I am in love with Rukawa Kaede, that's what," I replied.
Hiro-kun blinked. "But WHY?!"
I blinked back. Is this man stupid or what? "You don't ask a person *why* he falls in love with someone," I replied.
He blinked again. "But WHY?!"
Poor guy. Probably lost. He has to fall in love. He has to get laid. I sighed. "You just love a person for who he or she is. No questions asked." Hey! That's a meaningful statement! Hooray for Sendoh Akira! Dr. Love! *That* would put Hiro-kun in his place!
"Sendoh, are you sick?" he asked.
Now what? I give him one of my most profound statements and he asks me if I'm sick? Now who's the bigger idiot? Now, now. I'll ignore this hotheaded friend of mine for a while.
I have to think of a way to make Kae-chan- er- Rukawa-kun fall in love with me. Okay... maybe that's too farfetched. He'll have to notice me first. Without a basketball, of course.
Think, think, think, Sendoh Akira!
"O-re-wa-ten-sa-i!"
Huh? What was the self-proclaimed tensai doing here?
"Sa-ku-ra-gi!"
People gave Sakuragi-kun a diry glare as he stomped down to an empty booth.
"Oi! Kitsune! Hurry up, will ya!" he hollered. My handsome ears perked. *HE'S* here?!
And in he strolled.
A god, that's what he is. He walked with perfect grace. He practically glowed. Oh, I love him!
I stood up and waved, but he didn't even look at me. My heart broke again. He just walked over to that hollering Sakuragi, bonked him on the head, uttered a small 'do'aho' and sat down.
He ignored me again.
"Did you see that, Hiro-kun?" I whined. "He ignored me again! Oh, how painful it is for me! The agony! Sweet torture!"
*Bonk!*
My bestfriend actually hit me again.
"Itai!"
"Quit being such a whiner, Sendoh," Hiro-kun snapped. "Stand up! Fight for what you believe in! Be a man!"
Be a... man?
*THAT* coming from this ever-complaining wimp?
Wow! Heaven must be in a good mood today!
"So, what am I gonna do, Hiro-kun?" I asked eagerly. He might have some useful suggestions.
"I don't know," he replied with a blank face.
I should have known.
I sighed again, for the umpteenth time. I looked over to Rukawa's table. He was busy uttering insults to the uncontrollable Sakuragi. And again I wonder... why is it that he's always with Sakuragi-kun, anyway? They're always together. Why is it that he pays too much attention to Sakuragi? Yeah, Sakuragi's cute, but I'm cuter! Yeah, he's good in basketball, but I'm better! Yeah, he's tall, but I'm taller! Yeah, he's muscular, but I am, too! Yeah, he's sexy, but I'm sexier! Yeah, he's loud and obnoxious, and a little dense, and off-beat and a do'aho but I'm-...
...
I'm not.
...
...
"That's it!" I exclaimed. Hiro-kun almost jumped out of the table. I gave him a triumphant smile and he gave me a suspicious glare.
"Don't involve me," he simply said. I laughed.
"Oh, Hiro-kun, I have a brilliant idea!" I said happily.
"The last time you said that, I was forced to witness the most horrendous hoola dance in the entire history of mankind," he said.
"Oh, come on, best friend, humor me for a while would you?" I asked. He raised an eyebrow, silently urging me to continue. "Okay... you know that Rukawa-kun never paid too much attention to me, right?"
"I can understand why."
I ignored that remark. "Okay... earlier, when I was doing the hoola, he noticed me, right?"
"It's inevitable."
Oh, Kami-sama, please give the the strength that I needed to bear with this man's dry sarcasm.
"Okay... look at Sakuragi."
"Why would I do a juvenile thing like that?"
"Just look at him!" I snapped. He sighed and looked at Sakuragi who was laughing his head off at his own lame joke. "Well... what do you notice about him?"
"He's a moron."
"Exactly! And who's with him?"
"Rukawa."
"Exactly!" I said happily.
Hiro-kun just gave me a blank stare. "And your point is...?"
This man is just too dense! "Hiro-kun... listen to me-"
"I'm trying to."
"Would you just drop the sarcastic remarks and listen to what I have to say?" I snapped. *That* got his attention.
"Fine. What do want to say?"
"I know how to get Rukawa's attention!"
"How?"
"Well, hear me out. While I was doing, uh, *civilized* things, he wasn't paying any attention. But earlier, when I made a fool of myself, he finally noticed me! And he actually talked to me! Yeah, well, it was a cold 'do'aho', but that's a start, right? And no, Hiro, don't say anything. Lemme do the talking. Yes, where am I? Oh right... the do'aho part. And yeah, look at him now. He's hanging out with Sakuragi Hanamichi. He *always* spends his time with Sakuragi. And Sakuragi is a what? A do'aho. And earlier, I am a what? A do'aho. So that's it, Hiro-kun! Rukawa-kun *likes* do'ahos!" I ranted.
And all the while, Hiro-kun's was giving me a look which says 'You are a moron', but I decided to ignore that, too.
"Don't you see?" I asked. "The only way to get Rukawa's attention is to act like a do'aho! I'm going to act like Sakuragi Hanamichi!"
Hiro-kun said nothing.
Oh, to hell with him! I finally found out how to make Rukawa-kun love me! Let's try it out, shall we?
"Ore wa tensai!" I hollered. "Nyahahahahaha!!!"
And I could actually see him turning around to look at me! He was giving me a strange look, but hey! He's *looking* at me! Hooray!
"Oi! Kitsune! What are you looking at?!" I demanded. "Are you oh-so-dazzled by this tensai?"
I wanted to laugh. Sakuragi's eyes could have popped out from its sockets. Rukawa, as usual, was expressionless, but he's noticing me.
"I am a genius!" I hollered again. "Basketball genius! Nyahahaha!"
Hiro-kun was practically hiding under the table.
"I do not know this person," he said whilst hiding his face from the public.
"Oi, substitute!" I called out, referring to Hiro-kun, of course. "Aren't you glad that your best friend is the greatest basketball genius of Kanagawa? Nyahahaha!"
"I said, I don't know you!" Hiro snapped. He stood up and left.
Oh well...
"I'll call you later, pal!" I shouted.
I looked at Rukawa once again.
He was still staring at me.
And then finally...
"Do'aho," he muttered.
And then I knew... that I have just thought of the best plan ever!
*********
tsu.zu.ku
*********
This is crazy...
But what do you expect from me?
BTW, Celibacy chapter five will come out some time next week. Monday or Tuesday, perhaps. But no later than Tuesday... I don't want to make you guys wait any longer.
Aki ^_~