"Please Gracie, don't wake your brother"

I can hear Alex try and calm down our two month old baby girl with every will in his body in the hope that we'll have only one baby awake to take care of and, heaven help us, not two. When her wailing starts to go down I can see the hope for a calm and serene night on my husband's features. But it barely has time to start to grow into an actual calm and serene night when I hear a cry coming from the babies' room. Alex's face falls.

"Oh now that's just great" he mutters to Grace. He looks up at me with desperate eyes. I smile softly at him and open my arms. "Yeah right um... Here take Gracie" he hands me the now quiet baby and heads to the twins' room. "I'll go take care of Graham!"

I smile again and can't help but think that; even though we are both sleep deprived and haven't had time to ourselves for two months; I have never been this happy in my entire life. I have a husband I love and who loves me back; two beautiful, healthy, amazing children; a dog incredibly stupid but also incredibly sweet; a job I enjoy; and enough money to actually sustain all that. We have built something permanent, the family that we never had, and it feels so, so good.

When we learnt that we were expecting, it took about two weeks for Alex and I to come to terms with the fact that we hadn't have proper parents of our own, or just not any parents all together, and that now we had to raise a kid into this crazy world with not one bit of experience. After that the happiness of the pregnancy took over and it was just bliss... Until, at the first ultrasound, we found out there were two. I looked at Arizona, who had insisted on being the one to do it, and looked at her in shock.

"What."

"You're having twins Jo, and you'll be ok" she tried to reassure me. "And you'll be too" she said while turning to Alex who was just gone really. He was staring blankly at the floor.

I started to worry when we got home and he still hadn't said a word. I had been babbling about how there was plenty enough of room, and that it'll just double the happiness. But not a word left his mouth. We went inside and he stopped right in the hallway. He was looking to the ground and I saw something change on his face. I took his hands in mine and he looked up at me.

"Honey are you ok?" I asked.

Then the most beautiful thing happened: a huge smile cracked on his face, the biggest I had ever seen. He took me in his arms and swept me off the ground. His laugh, muffled on my shoulder, got me giggling too and we just stood there laughing like idiots, and then we moved to the couch (our very beloved one) and kept on laughing and smiling and laughing again. When the mood settled down we just stayed there, content.

"Alex?"

"Mmmh" he hummed in response.

"Earlier, when we were in the hallway, I saw your face change at some point" He smiled at that.

"And?"

"I was just wondering what went on in your mind"

He took a deep breath, looking in the distance, before he explained to me:

"Ever since the ultrasound I was just thinking about how everything was going to really, like really, change. It all became so real suddenly, plus with twins I thought... I thought every thing was going to be different. I was not freaking out, but close." We chuckled together. "When we got in here, I looked at this place and all I could see was a crazily epic household, with two toddlers running around and laughing, my beautiful wife laughing along and just being happy. And when I pictured myself in the middle of this agitation I pictured myself laughing next to you, being the happiest man on this planet." He looked down at me, I was looking up at him. "Everything's going to change, and it's gonna be the greatest adventure of our lives" he finished.

Even though I was totally tearing up, I couldn't help but answer

"Dude, you get so sentimental sometimes"

When six month later, on February 1st Grace (or Gracie as her father loves to call her "We got her a name, why change it?" I always tell him) and Graham were born; respectively at 1:01 and 1:13 a.m. (they really love to keep us up at night); only three weeks early, without complications, perfectly healthy and beautiful, we were still the happiest couple in the world.

When four days later we went home with them and put them to sleep in their cribs, and Graham got up at one in the morning and Grace at three, we were still the happiest couple in the world.

When we didn't have one full night of sleep in the two months that followed, we were still the happiest couple in the world.

"My beautiful baby girl"

I'm still holding Grace, softly rocking her, careful not to wake her. That would be a disaster. I touch her beautiful thin hair that'll probably; hopefully Alex says; grow to be like mine. Stroking the soft skin of her cheek my heart swells with happiness, and I put all my future in her, and her brother. I see her growing up, though I don't want her to yet, to become an amazing woman ("Just like her mom!" Alex would add).

As I imagine everything that my daughter could be, I hear a knock on the door. Graham is still crying and Alex probably didn't hear, I get up to answer it. I see it's almost ten p.m. already and I wonder who it could be at this hour. I think about Meredith first, obviously. But it's not her.

A fairly old lady; in her sixties, seventies maybe; is standing at the door. I open to her, she seems harmless enough.

"Good evening madam" I greet her with a slight smile "Can I help you?"

She looks at me with pain in her eyes.

"Are you alright?" I ask her, concerned.

"Jo Wilson?" Is her answer.

I just stare in shock for three seconds. Do I know this woman?

"That's me, yes"

I start to panic when I remember what Alex told me about that old man who had shot him after losing his wife at the hospital.

"You have a baby?" It's confusing, I see happiness and pain and sadness in her eyes, I can't understand why she's here. "What's her name?" she asks with a smile after a second.

When she takes a step forward I put a second protective hand around my daughter.

"Excuse me madam, but what do you want?" I ask dryly.

She tears her eyes from the baby and looks up at me. She's tearing up, on the verge of crying. It's funny, her eyes look just like mine. "Oh I'm so sorry" At that moment she bursts out crying and falls to the ground. I let my guard down and follow her, getting at her level. I search her face with concern.

"What is it madam?"

She looks into my eyes again, and somehow I know why she's here, the realization hits me, and I just know. "I'm so sorry, my baby girl"