I'm not Okay, I Promise
Authors Note: This is my first ever Hannah Montana fanfiction, and I really hope you like it. This story was inspired by the Degrassi episode "When Time Stands Still Part 2", the Hannah Montana fanfiction Code Red, the songs Ghost of You, and Helena by My Chemical Romance, also Just Like A Prayer by Madonna.
Disclaimer: I do not own Hannah Montana or My Chemical Romance.
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"Ever gets that feeling that you're never all alone?
And I remember now.
At the top of my heart in arms she dies
She dies…"
My Chemical Romance Ghost of You
Silent tears slid down Lilly's face, as she exited the car. Her black and white Etnies dragged mournfully across the parking lot. It was a cloudy day, that had been raining off and on. She looked up, and was instantly wrapped into a hug from her best friend Oliver.
"You okay, Lils?" he sniffed, pulling out of the embrace. At first the blond had nodded, but her breath hitched, and she shook her head.
"No. I'll probably never be fine again," She sobbed, her voice hoarse. "She was shot right in fucking front of me!"
His arms wrapped around her again, tears streaming continuously down his face. He rubbed her back comfortingly, as the rain began to sprinkle upon them. She squeezed him tighter as the thought of the water that pelted them gently being Miley's tears. She had remembered the day she faded away so perfectly.
Lilly had driven off campus, heading for the bank before Lilly treated Miley to a perfect lunch at her favorite Italian restaurant. Both girls were glad that today was a half day or else the brunette's deathly craving for Chicken Fettuccine Alfredo would have attacked the school. Despite her many protests, Miley reluctantly gave into letting Lilly buy them both Olive Garden. When they pulled up to the bank, Lilly waited in the car for Miley to go and get the money. For some reason, she loved the ATM machine, so the blond let her ditsy, but loveably brunette girlfriend get the money.
Miley had been taking longer than usual, and her girlfriend became worried when a rather suspicious man had walked around the corner to where the automated teller was located. Giving into her gut feeling, Lilly killed the engine of her Baja Bug, and exited the car. Almost immediately after she rounded the corner, a bang resounded, in Lilly's ears, echoing off of the brick walls surrounding them.
Suddenly, everything was crystal clear.
She heard her scream as Miley's body collapsed under the weight of the bullet. Blood instantaneously trickled down from the small wound that was inflicted.
"MILEY!" Lilly screamed, as she charged forward, collapsing onto her knees, next to her fallen lover.
Panic tore through her body, as she applied pressure to the wound on her stomach, her hand almost instantly becoming covered in her blood.
"Miley," Lilly whispered. When she didn't get a response, her right hand fumbled for her pulse point, faintly it pushed against her fingers but it was quickly fading.
"SOMEBODY HELP! HELP ME!" Lilly screamed in desperation, looking around in terror. She watched as a good Samaritan pulled out his cell phone, running into the crowded bank, screaming something about a doctor, as he dialed 911. Her gaze fell back to her girlfriend. "Come on Miley. Wake up. You have to wake up." Lilly whispered her voice cracking with emotion.
Lilly brushed her hair back and ran her hand across her cheek. She searched her face for any signs of consciousness. Tears began to fall when Miley did not move.
"Please Miley. Come on baby; just open those beautiful blue eyes so I can know you're alright. It can't end like this." Lilly cried as she looked down at her.
She felt for her pulse again. Lilly noticed it was much fainter than before. She looked around to see if the man had found help yet, but there was no sign of it other than the very faint scream of sirens. When she turned back she came face to face with Miley, her sapphire eyes looking into her electric blue.
Miley smiled up at her and whispered, "Lilly."
"Hey, hey don't talk. A man went to get help. Don't worry you're going to be fine," Lilly smiled back at Miley.
"I love you so much." Miley nuzzled her head as she leaned against the blond, her eyes still piercing Lilly's, swallowing had, as she fought for her breath. "Don't be afraid to move on."
"Don't you talk like that! Don't you dare talk like that, you hear me?! You're going to be alright, I promise!" The brunette began coughing and blood began to trickle down her mouth. She gave one final cough before she collapsed against Lilly.
"Miley!" Lilly yelled out, brushing away strands of hair.
She pressed her ear against her chest and listened for a heartbeat. When she couldn't hear any she began to scream even more desperately for help. "Miley, please, don't, don't do this to me! Miley!" she cried out as loud as she could willing her to come back. Lilly felt the tears sliding down her face, she had never really been a church going person, but at that moment she pleaded with every higher power that Miley would be alright. It took several moments before anyone rounded the corner, and the blond clung to the dead songstress, rocking her back and fourth.
The paramedics ran over to Lilly and Miley and began to put Miley on a stretcher. The paramedics wheeled her away from the bank with Lilly trailing behind. They loaded her into the ambulance truck and climbed in.
She had been revived several times during the ride there, but when they had reached the E.R., Miley Ray Stewart was pronounced dead, and less than a half an hour later, the shooter, was pronounced dead after eating the barrel of his Colt 45.
Oliver and Lilly walked across the grass, the rain falling in thick sheets now, as they passed tombstone after grave. Her feet sloshed in the grass that had now turned into a large puddle. She took notice of nothing around her, not even the blood that began dripping from her hand as she clutched her roses. Tears continued to stream down her face, the great thing about rain was that no one could tell.
Lilly had taken her seat just as the Service had begun, before her laid a beautiful black steal coffin. Oliver was the one who had convinced her to come to the funeral; Lilly knew that she would be unable to face the Stewart family. As she looked across her, Jackson's bloodshot eyes met hers. Underneath his eyes were deep bags, clearly he hadn't slept in three days.
He hadn't slept since the shooting.
Robbie's hands were balled into fists, which were pressed painfully into his forehead. Both of them had constantly called to check up on her, and to thank her.
She looked up at the preacher, and anger boiled beneath her skin. Here he was talking about how great of a person Miley was, what she loved, and what she hated. What right did this guy have to talk about her? He had never met her in his life! He was just doing his job! His fucking job!
Her eyes were once again bombarded with tears, as she looked at the pictures that were sitting on a stand next to the casket. One was of her and Miley, holding onto one another, one of the three friends, and then finally one of her bother and dad. She barely registered the preacher asking those who had brought anything or would have liked to say anything before the burying of Miley to please step forward and pay there respects.
Both Robbie Ray and Jackson stepped up, and said something to there loved one. Both had placed seventeen roses into the casket, one for every year she had walked this beautiful earth. Lilly shut her eyes, willing the tears back as her mind flashed back to that afternoon. Oliver stood; walking to casket his best friend's father and brother had stood moments ago, and placed a white rose inside as well.
Swallowing hard, Lilly stood; she looked down at the sleeves of her favorite hoody, it had the words, Paramore, written across the front. She had received both the hoody and a white t-short from the band with all there signatures on it, as a gift from Miley about two and a half years ago, whom of which had know how much the skater loved there music.
The blond looked down at the one she had fallen so deeply for. Miley looked as if she were sleeping peacefully, like the so many times Lilly had woken up to that face. Gone was her white bloodstained shirt, in it's place, a blue shirt with splatters of red and both the Pepsi and Coca-Cola logo's, and the words "Meant to be" written on it. The silly shirt was her favorite due to the fact that it reminded Miley of her and Lilly, because the skater liked Pepsi, and the pop star, Coca-Cola. Her jeans were replaced with a pair Jackson had bought for her, and the bottle cap necklace Robbie had gotten, for her 16th birthday.
"Miley," she whispered, trying to keep the trembling out of her voice, ignoring the sea of black that surrounded her, speaking as if it were only the two of them in her room like so many times before. "I…I love you. So much that it kills me to know that you're gone." Her breath shook, as she summoned the courage to continue. "You told me to not be afraid of moving on. But... I can't do that. You mean more to me than life itself, and there's no one in this entire galaxy, who could possibly mean as much to me…who I could even share the same feelings for…as I had done with you." The broken teen whispered.
Lilly's sun kissed hair was pulled out of her face, by a small, cool breeze. She inhaled her lovers favorite scent of a pine forest, as her sorrow filled indigo eyes looked at the setting sun in the distance. She could feel a feather light touch against her cheek, wiping away the crystal tears. I love you, Miley's husky Tennessee voice blew against her ear in the softest of whispers.
"I love you too." It was the only thing that she could choke out. She placed two red roses, onto her stomach, one of them real, the other a fake. It had been the gift she had given her for there first anniversary, she had walked up behind Miley, and whispered. "I'll love you until the last rose wilts."
Lilly's hand covered her face as she placed a single white rose, beside a real diamond ring, concealed in a little black box. She had planned to propose the very day she had lost Miley.
The day she had become her Helena.
"What's the worst I can say?
Things are better if I stay.
So long and goodnight.
So long and goodnight."
My Chemical Romance Helena
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So, what do you think? I tried to portray a lot of emotions in this, and what it feels like to lose some one close to you, the Helena part is a reference to the song by My Chemical Romance. Review and let me know if you liked it, loved it or if you want me to delete it.