Hello, this is first timer to , the great and legendary Monkeybandit2...! Ok maybe soon-to-be great and legendary... The following is my first work of fiction, so please if you insist on murdering me for this, at least leave my face alone so my family has the opportunity to have a open casket funeral if they so wish.

Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Naruto, which has been written and illustrated by Masashi Kishimoto, and same applies to Army Men RTS by the company 3DO. The following is meant for entertainment purposes to the readers of . Hope you enjoy.

I would like to note this is not a crossover, if anything it mentions as mentioned game by 3DO.

Of life, war, and arguments

Ultimately he could understand how it came to this... Whatever this was anyway... It just seemed so, for the lack of a better word in his mind, troublesome.

All one Shikamaru Nara could do at the moment was recall how his current predicament came to be, which in itself was troublesome in its own right according to his thoughts at the time, yet it could at least in part give him a clue as to why he is staring back at his mother who had long since started to stare him down with two burning fireballs that were her eyes. Come to think of it, he usually is sweating by the pint at this point, why wasn't he? He ignored this question in favor of the allegedly troublesome quest down memory lane.

It all started earlier in the week when a new invention came into Konoha in packs, big clunky devices known as computers complete with things called monitors, speakers, mice (or more accurately a mouse yet there was the fact they were in the multitudes), and keyboards. Ultimately Shikamaru had little interest in these devices in favor of his more preferred past time of cloud watching, a proud Nara tradition if they could get a say into the subject; they were more busy avoiding the wrath of their respective spouses/persons-of-interest than talking however. However this did not halt the approach of the world of electronics in the form of his sensei in the ninja arts, Asuma Sarutobi bearing the what could later be called the gift of his demise... One package containing all the necessary components for a computer plus a game from a company he neither heard of nor took the time to look into.

The only reason Shikamaru had installed both computer and the game, known later as Army Men RTS, was because his sensei had managed to take the time and effort to find and use the proper wording to intrigue the Nara enough to break his character to actually do work, he ultimately presented said Nara with a challenge in the form of the A.I. of the game pitted against Shikamaru. Shikamaru himself could not help but be intrigued, and later could not help but suspect Asuma had a ulterior motive behind all this while under pressure, was this a confrontation his sensei planned on or was it something else? The Nara would have to learn the truth of the matter of it later... if he lived.

As to how the confrontation between him and his mother, and how Army Men RTS got involved, it was rather simple... supposedly. He was ordering a armor heavy assault on his enemy's base and the opposition was losing under the fire power as their numbers were dwindling down to some of their own armor and sparsely placed infantry unable to regroup under the barrage of Shikamaru's assaulting army, amongst the armor were medics in the field under his enemy's banner doing what can be done to keep their respective side alive to repel Shikamaru's assault. Now in his mind he knew that ideally no one, despite their allegiance to whatever village or country and all that comes with it (i.e. grudges or willingness to be spiteful), should be willing to slay, destroy, or otherwise prevent a medic or doctor of some kind provided that they know they are someone trained in the medical field, with the mild exclusion of combat medics on the grounds that they tend to try to kill their enemies too while performing the services their station demands of them.

However this didn't really give Shikamaru pause for four reasons; reason one, like it no one lives in a ideal world when it comes to a battle; reason two, if he allows them to perform their duties then the enemy could in direct relation to being healed fight longer and could cost him his impending victory; reason three, this was ultimately a game, no one was really getting hurt; and finally reason four, they made it clear his own medics were just as good targets as his troops... he did not like that. With a click of a mouse his infantry, tanks, and anything else with a weapon available took aim at the enemy medics, just in time for his mother, one Yoshino Nara.

Needless to say she spotted the carnage the medics were being subjected to and instantly voiced her opinion in a devastatingly booming voice of outright disbelieve and outrage, "You do know that it is considered taboo to deliberately engage and harm medical personal, don't you Shikamaru Nara?" Shikamaru to his credit kept calm under the intense stare/glare of his mother, and briefly thought he saw that both armies of the game give pause and look at his mother in startled shock before resuming their battle... he might need to do something else for a little while.

With a sigh and a groan, Shikamaru rubs a hand through his hair in frustration before looking his mother in the eye as he replies, "Granted I'm not supposed to but there are factors into the reasoning of shooting them, such as the fact that if I don't then they'll just keep coming back to defeat me just as thoroughly as I am trying to defeat them." His mother narrowed her eyes as well as became slits with a gleam in her eye of controlled rage. Granted she didn't know as extensively about war as both her son and her husband, but she knew enough to call them out.

"You're still not supposed to," was her terse reply. All she got was an annoyed groan from her son, and his somewhat earned and proven rebuttal as his experience with the game has shown him, "Tell that to them," Shikamaru said as he pointed at the enemy base on the screen as he continued, "They're shooting mine down with as much ire as my own units." At this point he did start to sweat as he swore his mother grew in height and the fire in her eyes becoming literal as opposed to figurative.

Much to his relief, his mother just stormed out of the room, but he knew it wasn't over by a long shot.

His hearing, sharpened to a degree by his profession, picked up her foot steps into the living room not too far away from his own room. He also picked up her own rant to his father, Shikaku Nara, about him performing 'war crimes' as she had deemed it, and his two excuses in place of defending his reasoning. He actually smirked as he caught his father's response to his mother's demand to speak to him about the rules of engagement, "Well he is right, they are going to make it harder if they keep coming back." What he heard next was not surprising as it was painful to hear. "CLANG!"

So ended another day where cloud gazing was not to be preached by a member of the Nara clan.

He could not help but wince at his father's behalf as he heard something land on the floor with an audible thump and a groan of agony.

XVX

Elsewhere...

He couldn't believe his luck. These computers were probably the best thing to ever happen in his life, with a few exceptions of course on a give-or-take basis. Ino was now addicted to internet shopping over anything that so much as looked cute or pretty, Chogi was viewing, reviewing, and hunting down recipes to various recipes that changes daily, and Shikamaru was testing his wits against A.I. opponents, speaking of which he may have to consider gathering more games to ensure Shikamaru would be distracted for days to come. Overall Asuma Sarutobi was having a grand week by himself.

No one disturbed him, not his students, not the Hokage, and not his girlfriend whom he also managed to ensure in his electronic plans; it was just him, a cold drink in hand, and a beach with a blazing sun showing off its glory to all those that cared, save for Asuma who was more interested in the success of his plans to get everyone off his back. Oh and Kakashi was there to reveling in the success of his own version of Asuma's plan, minus the girlfriend of course, and replacing the cold drink with a book of a dubious nature, with guest appearance of the author of his favorite book(s) of choice, the one and only toad sannin himself, Jiraiya, how could Asuma forget? In any case he lacked the ability to care; this was a unofficial vacation and he was going to enjoy it! Ok there was the brief moment of curiosity as to why they were on the same part of the beach but he could care less.

His mind however did go over a brief list as to Kakashi's version of his plan played out; Naruto was almost copying Chogi only being ramen specific, Sakura was also a bit of a shopping alcoholic, much like Ino, only geared to earn the eternal love and devotion of Sasuke... HA! As for Sasuke... Asuma could not remember accurately, just that he hasn't left his home since he got a computer. He didn't know nor cared.

Neither cared about the happenings of the world and like-wise ignoring Jiraiya at the same time save for the occasional peaked interest from Kakashi; it was a unofficial vacation, and it was good.

XVX

Another Elsewhere...

It was a grand week for her and Anko, no interruptions, no students to worry about, and her boyfriend was off in his own little world believing himself to be a grand manipulator. Poor, poor Asuma... Ha! Kurenai couldn't help but smile to herself as she and Anko lounged about in Kurenai's apartment as they enjoyed a week to themselves.

It wasn't hard to get the idea into Kakashi's and Asuma's minds to essentially occupy their own students with the sudden introduction to the viral world. And neither lifted a finger to either encourage or prevent either Jonin in their belief that it was their plan, with respect of their own version of said plan, to escape Konoha for a week. Or how simple men can be at times.

A week to themselves without interruptions, and what a good week it was...

A/N: The second portion before the first "Elsewhere" was an actual 'argument' I had with my own mother years back when I was a kid. Thought it would be a good way to start things off, hope you enjoyed it, please review and please don't maul me! As to why Shikamaru instead of everyone's favorite blond, I thought he would fit better in the situation this was based on. The rest of it was just for fun.

Monkeybandit, taking off with your attention! No refunds.