Soul Partners

-Author's Comment-

Well. Here I am, a bit stressed with lots of writing to do with my other two stories… and yet oh look, here's another one! I should just stop doing this to myself now, oops.

But this story is… well, expect lots of crack fanfiction in here. It's actually a dream I had that one of my friends started begging me to write out and post, and I decided that having something easy and fun to write would be a great change to dabble at on top of my other stories.

I'm sorry to those of you who are waiting for the sequel to Shadows of Pride, I promise that I'll start that in very early October. So bear with me until then, okay? :)

So here this is. –laughs- Crack fanfiction alert, although it gets a bit more so later on in the story.

I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist, Hughes would still be alive if I did~

"You want to do what?!" I asked in shock, staring at the white figure in front of me.

The figure stood up, grinning. "I want to grant that silly wish of yours, girl. You said you wanted to go to Amestris, right? So I'm going to let you go."

I blinked at the creature that had popped up like some evil jack-in-the-box. "Wait… you're actually Truth? From Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood?"

"That's correct. I am also the-"

"-'Universe,' 'god,' 'world,' and 'me,' right?" I interrupted, listing them in random order and forgetting to let the creature do its own little speech and probably ticking it off. "Hold on, hold on, you still haven't explained how I even got here! Is this a dream? Or are you wearing a really good costume with some hidden voice changer or something?"

Truth frowned at me for a moment, then shrugged. "That's right, I am all of those things. And it doesn't matter how you got here; you're here now, and that's what matters. Now you have subconsciously knocked upon the doors of the Gate, foolish girl, so I will grant you entry."

"No! Wait! What about school? My friends and family?" Black tendrils suddenly burst out from this tall stone gate that was behind me, wrapping themselves snuggly around my limbs, torso, and head. I squealed in alarm and tried to wrench myself away as I was forcefully dragged backwards, the gates starting swing shut. I screamed again, reaching a shaking hand towards Truth.

The last thing I saw before the gates swung shut was its leering grin. Then it was a brief flash of darkness, and then… everything.

I was helpless to do anything but watch with wide, frightened eyes as knowledge flowed past, something that I could only imagine as a migraine started to throb in my head. "Hey…! Wait a minute, I know I'm a fan, but that was wishful thinking…! Come on, Truth! TRUTH! I was kidding! Kidding…" My voice died in my throat as more pain washed over me, and I suddenly knew that I knew Amestrian.

Now let's get this straight: I can't speak any other languages that English. I'm really, really bad at them, and yet suddenly I knew a completely new one, grammar and everything.

And that wasn't all… sciences I had never heard of, math I had never studied, information on a world other than my own all flowed into my head, and I started blacking out a little with the pain.

Something was coming up ahead; I could see white figures that looked familiar…

They were my family and friends.

I feebly stretched a hand out to reach for them, the pain making tears stream down my face. Just as I lunged the last few inches for a figure's hand, they suddenly vanished, my hand grasping at the air in front of me.

The pain was gone, but so were my family and friends.

A sense of loss came over me, and I staggered, leaning against the gate. I looked up, fighting back tears to watch as Truth grinned at me. "Well? Did you enjoy the truth?" It asked in amusement, and I shivered, glancing at the gate with wide eyes. Suddenly, in that instant before I had grasped the white figures, I had known the truth: if I had managed to grasp the figures, I would have known how to go home.

As it was, I was trapped all alone, about to pay the price for my silly wishes and daydreams about a show I had considered fictional and an impossible dream until today.

Well, dang it, this wish was certainly reality biting me in the butt.

"No, actually, I would have been just fine not being dragged into there against my will and just going home," I said, my voice shaking a little as a dug my fingernails into my skin to try and turn my tears off. "What is my payment? I don't want to lose a body part…" My voice pitifully tailed off, and I blanched as I realized that I could lose an entire arm or leg. Hell, I had never even fractured a bone before, so I couldn't imagine what that kind of pain would be like.

Truth giggled, a giggle that I would have sworn only an insane madman could have pulled off. "You don't? Well, how about I raise the price in exchange that it doesn't hurt?"

"What in the world does that mean?" I asked suspiciously. "But… no pain? Is it my memory? You can't have that, that's what makes me me!" I informed the being, crossing my arms tightly to try and comfort myself.

"No, no. How about your humanity?" Truth asked, grinning at me. "I know that you would agree with me that it's a very fair payment. You wouldn't mind, right?"

I stared at the white person for a long moment before my brain registered its words. "You want to turn me into a homunculus?" I tried not to let my eyes light up too much, but I was relieved beyond measure. Becoming a homunculus was a payment I would be more than willing to do; the homunculi were some of my favorite characters in Fullmetal Alchemist and becoming one would be an interesting adventure where I could heal myself without dying from all of the danger that hid in the dark corners of Fullmetal Alchemist. And if I was too truly be trapped in Amestris out of the blue like this and would have to give up something…"That sounds perfect!" I declared, lifting up my head.

Truth flashed another one of those grins, and suddenly I realized something: Truth had been one of my favorite characters, but right now I wasn't exactly thrilled to meet him so abruptly. What about my other favorite characters? Let's see… I had liked a lot of them: Envy, Pride, Greed, Ling, Barry the Chopper, Edward, Riza, Alphonse…

Well uh oh. Aside from a few on that list, I really, really didn't want to meet those characters. And if I became a homunculus…

"Wait, no, I take that back!" I stammered, about to ask if I could have some time to think. But it was too late: in front of my wide eyes, Truth started becoming skin colored as my skin turned even paler than it had already been. I noticed that my bangs that had been hanging in front of my eye turned black, and I suddenly staggered as I grabbed at my chest in pain. "OW!" I shrieked, falling back against the gate with a loud bang. I rested my head against the gate for a moment before groaning and giving one of my glares at Truth, who was now skin-colored. It didn't make it any less creepy-looking. We stared at each other for a moment, and then I managed to miraculously speak again. "Shouldn't I be leaving now, then?"

"You'd get killed." Truth said in absolute amusement, tilting its creepy head back at me. "Even with your new Philosopher's Stone, might I add."

"Probably." I agreed, rubbing the back of my head sheepishly. "But I can get by… I think. I've read enough fanfiction to know what to do in these situations!" I announced, trying to smile again. "Since when the heck did you care about whether or not your… guests lived or not afterwards?"

I mused that Truth would probably roll its eyes if it could as it replied. "You aren't an alchemist. So I'm allowed to give you a bit of … extra help, for amusement if nothing else."

"Okaaaaay." I said. Now that I was no longer in pain and getting used to the fact that this wasn't some sick joke, I felt a bit better. Well, actually, I couldn't feel my heart anymore and that was a little creepy, but it was better than needing automail right about now.

"First," Truth said slyly, sitting back down in its strange position. "From now on, your name is Deceit, not Cynthia."

"…how did you know my name, you stalker?!" Truth turned its face towards me, and I shrugged. "Yeah, yeah, I know, you're 'me.'"

"Second," Truth continued, apparently ignoring my comment. "Because of the way the creatures like you are, you can't use the information from the gate you achieved. Instead, you have one power corresponding to your new name and personality."

"Personality?!"

"Third, I'm going to give you a guide." Truth continued, again, like it was completely ignoring the girl whose life it had just shredded into little bits and taped back together into a new shape. "Whoever you touch first in Amestris will have their souls linked to yours; you will be able to feel each others pain, and if one dies so does the other."

"Hey, wait, hold the flipping phone! I don't want that!" I declared, shaking my head and crossing my hands into an 'X' in front of me.

"This makes sure that your guide will keep you alive and healthy," Okay, that's it, the being was ignoring me now. Great, just great. I hadn't known that Truth could be even more stubborn than me! "You'll also be unable to go farther than thirty feet from each other."

"Whaaa…?" I managed to squeak in anger. "Hold on, I-" Suddenly the gate behind me creaked open, the doors shoving me forwards. As I tumbled onto my hands and knees, black hands wrapped around my ankles and yanked. "This conversation was very one-sided!" I managed to yell as I was yanked back into the gate, falling back into the darkness.

"Hey, are you ok?" A voice asked in Amestrian, and I moaned as I rolled over.

"Let me sleep… five more minutes." I promised in English, feeling strangely uncomfortable. Suddenly the events of the day replayed in my head, and I shot up into a sitting position. I turned and noticed a man peering down at me in surprise, with blonde hair and blue eyes, and he held out a hand for me to take to help myself up. Why did he look like he was straight out of an anime…?

Oh. Oh.

Whoever you touch first…

I managed a small forced smile at the man and stood up myself, brushing my jeans and hoodie clean. Somehow I had ended up in an alleyway on the floor, and the smell made me wince a little. Slowly, hesitantly, I managed to speak in stammering Amestrian. "Uh, thanks but… no thank you. I have to be going, mister."

"Hey, wait-" The man said in surprise as I dodged around him and darted out into the street.

A quick scan of my area made me wince a little; everything looked like it was from Fullmetal Alchemist, all right. I sighed, pushing my glasses up and studying the people; everything about this strange situation was like a wonderful dream and nightmare at once, and I scratched my neck as I thought.

"I've got no money, no clue as to where I am at the moment, and if I bump into anyone by accident I'm doomed." I said to myself, walking forwards and trying to stay close to the walls of the buildings to avoid touching anyone. "Should I try to find Edward or Alphonse to touch first? No… they get beaten up waaaay too much. I don't want to deal with that." I groaned, looking down another alley way and noticing that it led to another street.

I spotted something that looked familiar, and started cautiously walking down the alley. When I reached the end, I squinted up at the surrounding buildings and recognized one in the far off distance; was that the military headquarters? I grinned, giving myself a mental gold star. "Lucky me~" I hummed, a song popping into my head as I realized that I could go ask Roy Mustang for help. He would help out a frightened kid like me, right?

I, despite my aversion to running, started jogging down the street. Everything was going pretty well, actually. All I had to do was-

A misplaced crate was my doom. My foot hit it rather hard, and I was wearing flipping flip flops. A yell tore from my throat, and I tumbled forwards…

Right into some poor soul that was now stuck with me.

DANG IT ALL!

"Ow! Oh, are you all right? Oh my gosh, I am so sorry, I-" I said, trying not to cry again. The pain faded quickly, though, and I relaxed until the person I had fallen on shoved me off of him. Jerk. I lifted my head to glare at him, and my mouth dropped open.

The man raised one eyebrow at me, and a slightly feminine voice reached my ears. "Watch where you're going, why don't you?" He snapped, placing a hand on his hip.

I just stared at him for a long moment, realizing with sinking stomach something bad: I. Had. Touched. Envy.

Ooooh dear.

I took a deep breath and stood up, facing him. His eyes flicked to my face, and he frowned slightly. Got to be cool about this…

"What are you doing here, Envy?" I asked nervously, shifting to my other foot.

That was the wrong thing to say. Envy immediately stiffened, and I was slammed to the wall by my throat. "How do you know my name?!" He hissed, his purple eyes narrowing. "Who are you?"

"Wait, wait, wait, DON'T KILL ME!" I yelled, thrashing weakly. He was much stronger than he looked, darn palm tree. I took back that he was one of my favorite characters as well, this was going to be terrible. "I'm a homunculus too! I- HEY!" Envy had lessened his grip, studying my face for a moment, before smirking and grabbing me around the waist, hoisting me over his shoulder so I awkwardly hung there like some corpse. A very uncomfortable corpse at that, sheesh. Why did this guy have such bony shoulders, again? "Come on, Envy, put me down! I didn't do anything!"

Envy muttered something under his breath, and I squirmed a bit more before glaring down at Envy's back and complaining. "Envy! Stop it! Hey!"

"Stay still, or I'll knock you out," the homunculus threatened, and I cringed, going limp. "I don't know if by some sad miracle a pathetic weakling like you is a homunculus or not, but we'll let Father be the judge of that. You look enough like one, anyways. I have yet to see a human with purple eyes."

Oh, shoot. I groaned unhappily, watching Envy turn down another alleyway and walking towards something. I heard a door creak open, and we entered a dank stairway before Envy shut the door behind us. I knew where this was, all right.

I was so dead, and Envy hasn't even found out about the entire 'guide' problem yet.

HE WAS GOING TO KILL ME.

Ok, ok, I told myself firmly, thinking. Maybe other homunculi didn't count as people to truth, so I'm not stuck with Envy! I'll have to test that theory somehow, though…

I considered different theories, but the only way I could think of was hurting myself and see if Envy noticed any pain. I wasn't very keen on that, though, not to mention I shouldn't try and aggravate the psychotic palm tree too much for now.

Growling interrupted my thoughts, and I looked up to see red eyes staring at me. The gatekeepers, right. I had almost forgotten about them… dang it. Now, if even I wasn't stuck with Envy, I was going to be trapped here. In fact, it would be better to be stuck with Envy, because then I wouldn't die.

Getting beaten up does not qualify as dying, unfortunately.

"Is it too late to take what I said back?" I asked weakly as Envy strolled forwards, his feet slapping the floor of the underground tunnels. I noticed several bones, and cringed a little before trying to ignore them. Envy, being the little ray of sunshine that he is, completely ignored me (what's with everyone ignoring my questions today, geez) we stepped into a larger, darker room. Even facing backwards, I knew exactly where we were.

"Envy? What is it?" A voice asked, and I cringed as I was suddenly dropped to the ground. I managed to twist and hand on my back without getting hurt, thankfully, but I wasn't exactly ecstatic about this entire scenario. Sitting up slowly, I examined the many cords running throughout the room, all connected to the chair in the middle of the room. A man sat there, someone whom I was officially nervous of. Father.

"I found a rat claiming to be a homunculus." Envy said coldly, eyeing me. "She has the basic characteristics, though, so I thought you would be interested in her."

I glared back at the teenager, biting back a retort I knew I would regret, when Father stood up and walked over to where I was. I blinked up at him nervously, noticing his almost-white beard and hair. Yep, this was it, I was dead. Father motioned me to stand up, and I nervously did as he circled me. He considered me for a moment, and then spoke.

"Who made you?" He questioned, staring at me.

I blanched, suddenly interested in my feet. Lying seemed downright stupid, but I suddenly had the strange impulse to lie anyways so I decided to try and help my chances of survival with a mix of the two. "I… performed human transmutation, sir. My payment was apparently my humanity, and I'm really sorry about intruding on anything!" Was that strange impulse my deceit?

Both Envy and Father stared at me in surprise, and I laughed nervously before pushing my glasses up again. After a moment, Father gave me a nod before turning to Envy. "Envy. Care to prove she's telling the truth?" I barely had time to open my mouth before Envy suddenly grinned cruelly and attacked me, his hand shape shifting into a spear and stabbing through my body. I stared down at it, puzzled, and then the pain hit me and I started yelling as I saw black. I fell back to the ground as the spear vanished, clutching my chest as the black pressed in on me, red sparks the only thing I could see. After a moment, my vision returned, and I gasped in shock as I sat up and stared down at my perfectly fine and not skewered body. Had I… had I just died?

My predictions should stop being so darn right.

Envy was kneeling, his hand clutched to his chest and his eyes wide with surprise. "What was that?!" He yelled, his eyes narrowing at me threateningly. "How did you hurt me?"

I rubbed my face with one hand, wiping away a few tears, and winced as the pain started to vanish. "About that…" I swallowed, managing a shaky smile. "When I performed the human transmutation, I was transported to Amestris for some reason. My home is a really long way away, so Truth said I would get a guide for here by being mentally linked to whoever I touched first, able to share any pain with them and unable to go more than thirty feet away. And, um, if either of us dies, so does the other. Sorry, I really didn't mean to trip into you…" I nervously laughed, cringing as Envy stared at me.

"You have got to be joking." Envy looked like someone had just told him that he had gotten drunk and had married a palm tree by accident. I swallowed as he stood up abruptly and advanced towards me, and I scrambled away before he decided to kill me then and there.

"Envy." Father intervened, stopping the enraged homunculus. "Don't kill the girl. Actually, this works to our advantage since we have acquired another human sacrifice, and this one can't leave your side. Keep her healthy and out of sight for now."

Oh joy. I resisted the urge to bang my head against a wall, realizing that I had just been both saved and doomed at once. I was the one and only homunculus sacrifice, folks, what an absolute honor! NOT.

Envy paused and glowered at me for what felt like an hour, and then he sighed. "Fine, I'll take care of the weakling. Come on, then!" He snapped, and I scrambled after him out of Father's room.

Envy was fuming with anger as we walked down the corridor, and he suddenly stopped and told me to wait right there. In front of my confused eyes, he took off, running as fast as he could and turning a corner right up ahead. I waited, wondering what he was-

A jerk suddenly yanked me forwards, and I started being dragged across the floor against my will. Yelling curses, I grabbed a pipe to try and stop myself, but after a moment I was yanked off of it. After a brief moment, the sensation stopped, and then the wispy-haired sin stepped back into view. He seemed even madder then before, and I realized that he must have been testing the entire 'thirty feet' thing.

"If I figure out how to get of this, you're dead!" He snapped, and I sheepishly hurried up to him. "And I'm not going to make it painless, either, I'll start by ripping you apart and-"

"I'm Cyn- er, Deceit, by the way," I offered, and he shot me a glare which made me cringe. Well, it was better than having him go on about ways to kill me.

"Deceit? That's a stupid name," he scoffed, and I glared back at him.

"Hey, the seven sins are all taken, don't blame me!" Envy gave me a look, and I was silent for a moment before speaking again. "Oh, come on, it's not so bad. We're like, soul mates," I offered. This latest thing that had come out of my mouth without careful consideration made both of us freeze, and Envy slowly turned to face me. His face was a mix of 'You are so dead right now,' 'What is wrong with you,' and 'Say that ever again and you will die a painful death.'

I started coughing, my face turning pink. "Ah, uh, n-no, I didn't mean that! Oh, geez… you know what? Forget I said that." Envy raised one eyebrow at me before turning his back on me and starting to walk again when another idea popped into my head. "We're more like soul partners, anyways."

Sometimes, I wish I knew when to just shut up. And right now was one of those times.

Somehow, I knew I was in for a very long, painful week.

Am I the only one that likes Envy as a character but really wouldn't want to meet him? XD

Expect more insanity starting next chapter. –chuckles-

If you like it, please review… it makes the fanfiction world go around…. –nudgenudge-