Imperial Guard Forsaken
And yet again they go mute
its inexplicable
happens every time
they can't understand my mind
how lonely I've been
am
maybe its time to end
It happens every time. All of them go mute. I don't know what it is about me that drives them away, but its only me they're silent to. At one time I thought I had friends, how wrong I was. No one sticks around, and if they do they're silent with only an exchange of five or six words to break it occassinally. I drive everyone away.
It's made me lonely since the day I was born. I've always been this way, lonely, but now that the wars are over it eats at me, and the fact yells at me that I'm an inadequate human.
They talk to Heero more then they do me, and he's more silent then me. He appreciates it, all the silent ones do, no matter how much people may annoy them, it makes them human, having friends. I'm the opposite, I don't have that personality that draws people to you like them, or Duo, and Relena. I have no friends, not even Zechs mind you, although he would disagree with me on that statement. I have no one, I am a human shell with a soul that cries out in pain constantly, and all in vain.
None of them know what its like to be so shunned and disliked. I'm the cast-away, the forgotten. No need for me. I'm just the clutter from the past that no one wants.
They say that nothing is everything. How wrong they are, and yet how right. I'm sick of this existence. If I hadn't found the part of me that needed attention everything would be fine, but its not.
Which way to go, and should I leave a note has been my only concern for so long I'd care not say. I've decided against the note. For some reason I doubt anyone would read it, or care why I decided to do it.
I'm doing it today to spite them, and the world all together, because I've finally decided which way to go. It's classic really, slitting my wrists on my birthday while I'm supposed to be at work. It'll make the tombstone easy to make, and the eulogy even simpler. I love to be ironic, its been my life. A bad joke.
Another odd thing to note, after I press the blade to my wrist this crystaline room won't remain this way, my blood shall ultimately taint it.
I start to press the blade in against my left wrist. It doesn't hurt. I had thought it would. The motion is mimicked on the opposite wrist as well.
I wonder how long it will take? Blood tastes like copper by the way, and it flows now, smoothly, an entrancing crimson waterfall.
I wonder if they'll find me, and if they'll know this peace, or like the pools I've created, find them entertaining? Blackness creeps upon me, and I care not to ponder any further, it holds no meaning, none of it at all.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Unwanted Solitudes End
And yet again they go mute
its inexplicable
happens every time
they can't understand my mind
how lonely I've been
am
maybe its time to end
~r.l.w.
A/N: I was thinking of a sequel to this, but let me know what you think, please.
And yet again they go mute
its inexplicable
happens every time
they can't understand my mind
how lonely I've been
am
maybe its time to end
It happens every time. All of them go mute. I don't know what it is about me that drives them away, but its only me they're silent to. At one time I thought I had friends, how wrong I was. No one sticks around, and if they do they're silent with only an exchange of five or six words to break it occassinally. I drive everyone away.
It's made me lonely since the day I was born. I've always been this way, lonely, but now that the wars are over it eats at me, and the fact yells at me that I'm an inadequate human.
They talk to Heero more then they do me, and he's more silent then me. He appreciates it, all the silent ones do, no matter how much people may annoy them, it makes them human, having friends. I'm the opposite, I don't have that personality that draws people to you like them, or Duo, and Relena. I have no friends, not even Zechs mind you, although he would disagree with me on that statement. I have no one, I am a human shell with a soul that cries out in pain constantly, and all in vain.
None of them know what its like to be so shunned and disliked. I'm the cast-away, the forgotten. No need for me. I'm just the clutter from the past that no one wants.
They say that nothing is everything. How wrong they are, and yet how right. I'm sick of this existence. If I hadn't found the part of me that needed attention everything would be fine, but its not.
Which way to go, and should I leave a note has been my only concern for so long I'd care not say. I've decided against the note. For some reason I doubt anyone would read it, or care why I decided to do it.
I'm doing it today to spite them, and the world all together, because I've finally decided which way to go. It's classic really, slitting my wrists on my birthday while I'm supposed to be at work. It'll make the tombstone easy to make, and the eulogy even simpler. I love to be ironic, its been my life. A bad joke.
Another odd thing to note, after I press the blade to my wrist this crystaline room won't remain this way, my blood shall ultimately taint it.
I start to press the blade in against my left wrist. It doesn't hurt. I had thought it would. The motion is mimicked on the opposite wrist as well.
I wonder how long it will take? Blood tastes like copper by the way, and it flows now, smoothly, an entrancing crimson waterfall.
I wonder if they'll find me, and if they'll know this peace, or like the pools I've created, find them entertaining? Blackness creeps upon me, and I care not to ponder any further, it holds no meaning, none of it at all.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Unwanted Solitudes End
And yet again they go mute
its inexplicable
happens every time
they can't understand my mind
how lonely I've been
am
maybe its time to end
~r.l.w.
A/N: I was thinking of a sequel to this, but let me know what you think, please.