Contest: Twilight of Craigslist AD Contest (Part I)

Title: Male Mattress Tester

Rating: K

Word Count (minus A/N and header): 343

Don't forget to read the other entries! www. fanfiction. net/u/ 3211840/ Also, follow us on twitter! twiCraigslist

Went to Forks HS & free tomorrow? I need you! Wanted: Male Bed Tester – Free food, too! (Forks, Port Angeles, La Push)
Date: 2011-09-27, 7:13PM PST
Reply to: EllaBella (at) gmail (dot) com

Okay, stop looking at this ad as a pick-up line. I really need someone to come with me when I go shopping for a new mattress. (Not like I don't have any friends or anything, cause I do, but they're all super busy and I need a new bed like yesterday.)

I have this weird quirk that I can't sleep in a bed unless someone, or something, is in it with me. I am not about to ask some skuzzy mattress salesman to hop in bed with me so I can determine if I like the mattress or not. (I like my dreams nightmare free, thank you very much.) Which is why I bring up Forks High; if you went there and graduated class of 2006, then chances are that I probably know you and that would make this whole thing a hell of a lot easier to accomplish. Believe me I do not want to be meeting up with a total stranger just to get into a bed with them. Yeah, no.

I would take one of my teddy bears, but I'll be embarrassed enough without having to walk into Sleep Country with Mr. Snuggles under my arm and worry about someone calling the local sanitarium to ask them if they've lost a mental patient recently.

We can meet for breakfast, MY TREAT, and we can talk it over. What I'd really like is a man to pretend to be my boyfriend, or lover, or… something. For some strange reason, salespeople tend to look at men more seriously and even lower prices for them more often than women. (Sexist much? But, whatever.)

Like I said, all of this will be discussed at breakfast, MY TREAT, and then we can go from there. Please help me out here! What's better than a free breakfast and spending an hour or two with me on a bed? Okay, even though you know I don't mean it that way, it does sound interesting, doesn't it?

I await your reply.

Oh, and did I mention FREE FOOD?

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Public voting begins Oct 25 and runs through Nov 6. Don't forget to check back to the contest profile page on Oct 25 to place your vote!