Author's Note: This is a modern AU that's comprised of texts between Vincent Phantomhive and Diedrich, his old school friend and "loyal German hound". Their relationship is quite compelling to me, and I think it's one of the more interesting relationships in the Black Butler manga. It was undoubtedly complicated, but I firmly believe the two men meant a great deal to each other, and this is my interpretation of what their friendship might've been like.
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Monday
(6:12 PM) dee
(6:12 PM) dee r u there
(6:12 PM) dee plz respond
(6:13 PM) srsly mate where r u
(6:13 PM) DEE
(6:13 PM) DEE PLZ PLZ ANSWER
(6:13 PM) DEE THIS IS URGENT U NEED TO RESPOND NOW
(6:13 PM) WHAT R U DOING THATS SO IMPORTANT
(6:14 PM) U FEEL THE NEED TO IGNORE ME
(6:14 PM) Well, I /was/ doing homework.
(6:15 PM) Before you started bombarding my phone with messages.
(6:15 PM) oh
(6:15 PM) lol
(6:15 PM) sry
(6:16 PM) Well?
(6:16 PM) well what
(6:16 PM) What did you want to ask me?
(6:17 PM) Or tell me.
(6:17 PM) You didn't specify.
(6:17 PM) oh uh
(6:18 PM) what was the hw for prof laceys class
(6:18 PM) i fell asleep and didnt write it down lol
(6:18 PM) You really hate Latin, don't you?
(6:19 PM) its not so much the /class/ i hate
(6:19 PM) than it is prof lacey himself
(6:19 PM) hes got the personality and charm of a dry toe rag
(6:20 PM) Nice.
(6:20 PM) dont lie
(6:20 PM) u kno its true
(6:21 PM) I guess he is awfully monotonous.
(6:21 PM) I've caught myself dozing off in that class once or twice, now that I think about it.
(6:21 PM) y do u do that
(6:22 PM) Do what?
(6:22 PM) that
(6:22 PM) like
(6:22 PM) text so properly
(6:23 PM) ur english is better than mine tbh
(6:23 PM) u even add bloody punctuation for christs sake
(6:24 PM) Exactly.
(6:24 PM) English isn't my first language.
(6:25 PM) So I figure I might as well utilize any chance I get to work on it.
(6:25 PM) u could at least drop the punctuation
(6:25 PM) my god u text like an english prof
(6:26 PM) and not a cool one either
(6:26 PM) like
(6:26 PM) the ones that go mental on u if u forget a fucking period
(6:27 PM) thats what ur like
(6:27 PM) ur so weird dee lol
(6:28 PM) You're one to talk, Phantomhive.
(6:30 PM) By the way, you have to read an article in Latin on Prof. Lacey's website and then respond to questions about it on a separate sheet of paper.
(6:30 PM) what r u talking abt
(6:31 PM) The homework for Prof. Lacey.
(6:31 PM) That you were shitting yourself over a few minutes ago.
(6:31 PM) OHHHH
(6:31 PM) thnx dee
(6:32 PM) ur a real mate u kno that
(6:32 PM) :^)
(6:33 PM) Yeah, whatever.
(6:33 PM) i mean it
(6:33 PM) like
(6:33 PM) if i had a gun
(6:34 PM) and i was stuck in a room with u and my worst enemy
(6:34 PM) and there were no windows or doors
(6:34 PM) and the only way i could escape was by shooting one of u
(6:35 PM) i'd shoot u
(6:35 PM) because ur such a good mate and dont deserve to be stuck on this punishment orb we call earth
(6:36 PM) Is this supposed to be a compliment?
(6:36 PM) yes
(6:37 PM) And you have the audacity to call me weird.