I don't own Degrassi DUHH! Read & Enjoy!
Clare's POV
The whispers grew louder, and my feet moved faster. It was all catching up with me, every one knew now. Even him. I looked straight ahead, shoveling through the crowded hall and ignoring the laughs. I'm just "another Darcy". I'm no different. He knows that now. As I turned the corner, his eyes met mine. I tried to walk faster, but he grabbed my arm.
"So this is how you do huh Clare? And you can't even look at me, you just did your damage and leave?" Eli asked angrily. I stared up into his eyes and saw the visible pain hidden deep in them.
I snatched my arm way, "Eli, grow up. What's done is done, What I do doesn't concern you anymore ok?" Tears burned my eyes and I flinched at his next words.
"Clare Edwards, Saint Clare, My Clare?" He chuckled. "Come to find out, your just a common whore." He gave me one last look and walked off. His words ripped my heart into a thousand pieces, but this was what I chose. The school day passed quickly and after my last class, I began walking home. A car blasting loud music pulled up beside me, I looked over.
"Ohhh, here's my girlfriend now. I hear about you and goth boy. Broke up huh? Did he find out about our little secret meetings?" Fitz glared at me, threatening me as he spoke. "Get in". I shook my head and walked faster. I heard the car door open and seconds later Fitz stood next to me grabbing my arm. Fear trembled through my body as he pulled me to the car.
I saw Adam, a mutual friend of me and Eli's, walking up to me. "Clare, is everything okay?" Adam looked at Fitz, challenging him and Fitz just smiled. "Yea Adam, Clare is find so you should go find goth boy and leave her alone, she doesn't want to be seen with you losers, isn't that right Clare?" He asked, looking down at me. I nodded in agreement. Adam shook his head, shrugged his shoulders, and walked away. I wanted to scream and ask him to help me, but instead I just got in the car and rode away with Fitz.
Eli's POV
I hated it. I hated that I still loved her after everything she was doing to me. Just a few days earlier, we were okay, but once Fitz returned to Degrassi, she did the unthinkable. She slept with him. Seeing her hand, no purity ring. Kissing her, after another man jus had. It all sickened me. And what's worse? She cheated and then broke up with me, leaving me to find out from gossiping classmates. I sat in Morty all afternoon, soon it began to rain and I felt comfort for the first time this week. I laid back and thought to myself… "Julia, I miss you. I was dumb trying to replace you. You are irreplaceable. " and tears started streaming down my face.
Clare's POV
"Stop, Please!" I screamed, begging Fitz to get off of me, but he continued. Raping me, beating me, and the abandoned shack trapped my screams behind it's weak walls. Fitz smiled at me, slamming his fists into my chest every time I tried to move. I choked back tears and then he got up, releasing me. He pulled me close and held me around my waist. Uncomfortable and scared, I just held my breath waiting for him to let me leave. The shack was dirty and old, and we sat there in the middle of a wooden floor littered with trash and dirt. "Fitz" I managed to whisper.
"Yes Clare? He answered me innocently. Like he had done nothing wrong. I looked at him with begging eyes. "Please let me go. Why are you doing this?" Tears started to come but I forced them back. "I, I really love Eli. What if my parents hear the rumors? My mother would be hurt, I can't keep this a secret. What you're doing to me is wrong. "
He simply smiled down at me, "Oh no Clare, you can keep this a secret. Would you rather hurt your mom or I kill your mom?" The words left his lips coldly and I knew it was coming. His hand slammed against my face and he whispered in my ear. "Clare keep a secret Edwards, you may leave now, I'll see you the day after tomorrow. Afterschool." I grabbed my purse and ran out, never stopping , I raced down the sidewalk. I reached a corner an saw a familiar house, Eli's. I wanted to go knock on the door, tell him the truth, and let him know that I loved him. He would understand. But after what I said this morning, he would never believe me. He would never love me. Again. I continued to run and didn't stop until I was in my house, in my room, and in my bed.
Eli's POV
I heard someone running, and looked up to see a girl passing my house. She may have been jogging. I shrugged, I don't know, I looked at the clock. 7:34, I had been In Morty for hours, so I finally opened the door and slid out into the rain. I grabbed my bag and walked in the house. My mom looked down as I came in. "Eli, you do this everyday now. Come sit down and eat." she suggested. I shook my head and lied, "I already ate mom, and plus Morty is just a relaxing place to do homework." I walked up to my room and locked my door.
Bzzz! My phone vibrated. I looked down and read my new message. "Eli! I'm sorry about this morning, I love you. You know that, just right now is not a good time for us. I'm going through a battle, and me being with you will only hurt you." I shook my head in disbelief at her. then I smiled and responded to her text, "Eli Goldsworthy no longer involves himself with dirty sluts, but by the way, screwing other men and then going around the school bragging isn't a good method to avoid hurting someone." I would teach her. To talk snappy in the halls and then text me and say she loves me. I dont want to even believe that she loved me, or that I still love her.
After washing back a few pills, I was soon asleep in my bed, free from her. Free from the pain.
Clare's POV
I looked at the text and tears fell harder. Eli hated me. Everything he saw in me that he loved is now fading away. I stripped out of my clothes and showered. The hot water washed away at the surface but inside, I felt grimey. I was disgusted with myself. I looked in the mirror, my lips busted, and my face swollen. My eyes that were once a bright blue were now a faded transparent color. I fell asleep that night holding an icepack to my face and praying to God that tomorrow I would be stronger.
My alarm woke me up and I groaned. I didn't want to wake up. Not now. Not ever. I pulled on some clothes and headed out for school. Walking down the street, I could feel eyes on me. Everywhere, people passing me looked at my bruised face. I looked down ashamed. While my mother pranced around the house looking at me, and I waited for her to ask. I wanted to tell her, I wanted to run to her and cry in her arms. But she never noticed. She never saw my black and blue face. My heart slowed down as I saw Eli's hearse passing me. I could see him glaring at me from the side mirrors. I shrugged and entered into the building. The hallway wasn't as loud, the whispers died down, so my pace was slower than the day before.
"Clare!" someone yelled. I turned around and saw Alli smiling at me. Adam was beside her with a nonchalant look on his face. "Hey Alli, hey Adam." He waved and she continued. "I was thinking and tomorrow is Friday, how about me and you go out. Like old times, no rumors, no nothing. Just us?" I smiled at the offer but then my face went blank as I remembered tomorrow I had to meet Fitz.
"Sorry Alli, I have plans." I answered. She look disappointed, but nodded. She smiled, then her and Adam walked away. I took a deep breath and saw him approaching me. His arm slithered around my waist and I squirmed.
"Hey baby, I enjoyed you last night." He said loudly. People stopped and stared and the whispers started up again. I look at him and whispered, "Why does everyone have to know that we had sex? Can't you keep a secret since I am?" He smiled at me, "Clare, that's the best part. You're a girl nobody has had but me. I think that should be put on display." He smirked and walked away. Rolling my eyes in disgust, I headed to class. Looking at the back of Eli's head made me remember him. Remember us. Why didn't I tell him before it got so out of hand? I could trust Eli right? He would protect me. But instead I sat here in English wishing everything was different and every day after the bell he bumped past me and reality stung me painfully. Today was different, he got up and looked at me trying to make eye contact like he was trying to understand me. My heart fluttered looking in his emerald eyes, but then I heard a cough.
"Clare, get your ass over here". I turned around and Fitz was at the door waiting for me. I rushed over and took once last glance at Eli before Fitz could drag me off.
Eli's POV
Something was wrong. I could tell. She wasn't herself. She wore a heavy layer of makeup that seemed to be hiding something. Her skin was a pale blue and she looked broken. I loved her, I knew it. I knew it by just seeing her. I walked out the classroom trying to clear my head just as Fitz was turning the corner. Now was my chance. I sped up and cut him off. "We need to talk" I demanded. He smiled at me and shook his head. "What goth boy?" he responded.
I tried to ignore his remark by slowly breathing and then continuing. "So you and Clare an item? Or is it just sex?"
"Wouldn't you like to know perv?" he shot at me. I was furious but I kept calm.
"No, it's just that Clare texted me last night and I know she loves me. She told me. So what is up with you two? Is it just sex?" I waited for his response watching anger flash across his face.
"She texted you huh? That whore. She texted me and told me she loved me too. Haha I guess Saint Clare thinks she is a player now. And no it's not all about sex. It's the best part but afterwards we cuddle and I let her cook for me sometimes. She loves that." He walked off smiling, pleased with what he had just said. I stood there a minute, maybe she isn't as sad as she looks. It's just a front. Those words replayed in my mind all day. "Afterwards we cuddle and I let her cook for me sometimes." I chuckled at the thought. And hate reappeared in my chest.
The school day ended but I had to stay over to finish makeup work.
Clare's POV
I finally had a free day. No Fitz. When the hallway cleared I started walking to my locker. Fitz stood there waiting. He looked angry so I tried to move quickly and get away. He snatched my arm and laughed, dragging me into a janitor's closet. His fist jabbed at my stomach forcefully.
"Haha, so you texted him behind my back huh? He told me. You tell him you love him, I thought you loved me?" he questioned.
"No Fitz, I don't lov-" his eyes shut me up immediately.
"You do love me Clare Edwards, you will love me or you will die. Make this the last time he hears from you. Understand?"
I nodded and he forced open the door and pushed me into the hall. Eli was turning the corner and he saw me staggering to keep from falling. His face looked concerned and he rushed over to help.
"Clare, are you okay?" he asked. I stared at him begging for help and he looked over and saw Fitz leaving the closet.
Fitz grabbed my waist an answered for me "yeah she is fine, Guess she couldn't wait to get home." He laughed and looked down at me. "Tell him back off, you just missed Fitz after 6 long class periods." He demanded.
Eli looked at me and said softly, "You don't have to be with him Clare, you don't have to obey him. He doesn't own you." I smiled a little but felt Fitz tighten up on my waist.
"Eli, realize we are done, I want Fitz. Now leave me alone! Please!" The words hurt leaving my mouth and Eli's eyes gave me a cold look. He walked off and in my mind, I was screaming for him to save me.
Eli's POV
Here I was again, trying to save her. What was I thinking? She doesn't want to be saved. She must be happy, because Clare would tell me. She would trust me and come to me if anything was wrong. She was my bestfriend of a year and my girlfriend of 7 months, now she just threw it all away and I was left.. lonely. I rode home, parked my car, and laid back in Morty wishing it would rain.
Clare's POV
My day off was ruined. Eli and his big mouth. How could I ever talk to him if he would only go tell Fitz what I said. Fitz sped down the highway and we turned into a driveway. I knew this place and I got out and led the way through the trees until we reached the shack. Fitz tried to kiss me, I pulled back. I could tell he got mad. He didn't speak a word, but as soon as we stepped inside the shack, he closed the door and glared at me. "This will teach you" he mumbled as his hand wrapped around my neck, choking me. His other hand was clenched into a fist, and he beat me viciously. I screamed and begged. It didn't stop.
I woke up and looked around me, he wasn't there. I could feel my body aching and I looked at my cell phone. It was 6:32. I had been out of it almost two hours. Grabbing my purse, I started on my way home, this time limping slowly. As I passed Eli's house, I looked through his room window and wondered what he was doing. I wanted to knock on the door but I didn't I kept walking. Then I heard a car door, I looked over and there was Eli standing in front of Morty.
Eli's POV
I saw someone passing by my house. It was Clare. It was the same time that the girl passed yesterday. I couldn't see clearly yesterday in the rain. She stopped and looked at me. Her makeup was rubbing off and I could see the bruises she tried to hide. Marks on her neck and tears in her eyes. My heart dropped. I knew at that moment what was happening. I ran to her and grabbed her body close as she groaned in pain. "Let me go!" she yelled. "Let me Go Eli!" this time she pushed me back, but I didn't care. I held on to her tight and gradually she leaned into my embrace. I helped her up the steps and into my room. She collapsed onto the bed and began to cry. I sat on the side of the bed and whispered to her softly, "You can trust me Clare, tell me the truth. I love you". She looked up and the tears stopped.
"Okay", she started, "But you can't tell anyone." I nodded at her requests and she continued, "Okay so there is a shack a few minutes away. So Last week when I left your house I walked past that shack to meet Alli at the dot. I never made it. Fitz came from behind the abandoned area and closed his hand around my mouth."
"Clare!" I shouted. "What the-" she cut me off. " "Eli! If I'm going to tell you, you have to listen I need to get this out." I nodded again and she started back talking. "He pulled me into that shack and he raped me. I screamed but no one could hear. After he was done he just kept kissing me and whispering to me. He told me if I ever told anyone that he would kill me, you, and my mother. I love you Eli! I love my mother! I couldn't take that risk. I went home and the next day he extended the deal. He told me that I had to break up with you and that in school we would be a couple. I didn't know he was going to tell everyone we had sex but when he did I knew I had no choice but to go along. I didn't want to hurt you. I didn't want to leave you! Believe me Eli! He raped me every day since then! He beat me! He kicked me! But Eli I didn't say anything because I love you. I never knew how you felt about Julia until I realized how I would feel if I was responsible for your death."
Her words angered me. Tears streamed down my face and I hated myself. I called her a whore, I looked at her with eyes that could penetrate a steel wall. I hurt her when she was just protecting me. I was supposed to be there. I should've known. I am the protector and yet she was the one protecting me all along. I got on my knees and laid my head in her lap. "Clare, I'm so sorry. I love you. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Please. Just let me help you!" I begged.
Clare's POV
Eli's tears soaked my pants and he cried continuously. He was asking for my forgiveness, and funny thing was, I was never upset with him. I was keeping the secret. I was lying. I lifted his face with my hand. "Eli, I'm sorry. I was the one who caused this. I could've told you. I was just scared. Darcy never told me what this was like, she never warned me. She just kept it all in and now I just wish that she was with me.. So she could finally have someone to relate to. And my mom- She won't be able to handle this again. Eli, I was scared you would never love me again if you knew, you would think I was dirty and I could never kiss you again." I began to cry along with him, but then he looked up at me and kissed me. Everything froze and that perfect moment stood still until he pulled away to catch a breath. He sat up and pulled his arms around my body and held me tight, squeezing me. Tears continued to fall but I wasn't hurt anymore. Eli loved me. It was over. Wasn't it? Slowly me and Eli fell asleep.
Eli's POV
I woke up to my mom at the door with an angry expression on her face. I stood up motioning her to go in the hall. Clare was still asleep. I walked out pulling the door behind me and looked at me mom.
"Eli! Her mom called and asked where she was. What was I supposed to say? You hate her one day and then the next she is sneaking into your room spending the night?" Anger rattled in her voice.
I looked at her for a minute an decided, it was time to end this. "Mom, Clare has been raped. Repeatedly, this entire week. She came here last night beat up. She never cheated on me, she was threatened by a boy at school. I have to help her. I love her." tears came to my eyes and my mom's look softened.
"Eli! She has to get home and get help. Go ahead and take her and help her explain to her parents. I know you love her, but this will be the only way." She nudged me towards the door and turned leaving the hall.
Clare was still sleeping, I picked up her body carefully and carried her out to my car. Putting her into the front seat, I ran back inside to get my keys and bag. When I walked back outside I saw her awake staring out the window, and then I saw what she was looking at. Fitz stood there, anger flashing through his body and he began approaching Morty.
"Mom! Call the police!" I yelled inside the house. I ran out an beat Fitz to the car standing in front of Clare.
"Goth boy, you stole my girl, and now you are keeping her from me?" he said, coming closer to me.
I couldn't let him make the first move so I yelled for Clare to get out the car and run into the house as I wrestled Fitz down to the ground. I held him as long as I could until I saw Clare's body run into my mom's embrace. They stood at the door looking horrified. I let up punching him over and over again until I could see him slipping away. I didn't want to kill him so I fell back onto the ground and caught my breath. I saw his body move and his mouth opened. "I beat Clare better than that goth boy". He mumbled. The words angered me, picturing him beating Clare and I went back into a fit of rage. I didn't stop until I heard the sirens and the police officers grabbed me and pulled me up. They called an ambulance for Fitz. I ran back over to Clare when the ambulance arrived an carried her outside. They saw her body and began examining her. I watched as they carried Fitz in one ambulance and Clare in another. Before following the ambulance to the hospital, I called Clare's mom. She had panic in her voice and I explained the entire situation. I told her to meet me at the hospital before I hung up and me and my mom rushed off in Morty.
Clare's POV
I was bandaged up and sore, but I was alive. Here I was thinking I was protecting him, when all along, he was my protector. He promised me that he would never let anything or anybody hurt me, and he kept that promise. I looked up as my mom came rushing in. She grabbed my hand and cried. Then seconds later, Eli came running through the door. He embraced my mother and she cried on his shoulders. His mom came in and invited my mom down stairs for coffee in the gift shop. She agreed and there we were. Me and Eli, together, alone. No Fitz. No lies. No rumors. No nothing. And I loved it that way. He held my hand looking into my eyes. Although physically I was hurt, I was the happiest girl in the world with him standing there. My eyes glowed bright blue again and a smile came across my face. He kissed me. A busted lip, being kissed by Fitz, and all the hateful things I said. And he still kissed me. And our actions were confirmed by words.
"I love you" I whispered.
He pulled back my hair and smiled, "I love you too Clare."
R&&R Please, I'm a new writer and I want to know what you thought. Hope you enjoyed!