Weeeell, this one is long overdue, wanted to have it finished a long week ago already, but then time threw me a monkey bar. Or rather my job...
The song that inspired me to this one was "Schmeck mich" from Blackeyed Blonde, a band from my state. It's not the lyrics, they actually don't fit, but the song itself and the way the singer sings it. Purrrfectly. I to istened it over and over again while writing this and it made me and the story float all the time.
So I hope this one worked out ;)
Anyway, it's done now and I hope you'll enjoy it.
This one-shot is dedicated to Estellexxable. Some of you might know her as theheadstrongprincess from tumblr (theheadstrongprincess dot tumblr dot com). If not, I highly suggest you check out her blog ;)
Thank you so much for your support, girl! XOXOXO
The world around us falls quiet and the darkness becomes thicker as I have you pinned against the wall, blocking your way with my body... grabbing your wrists in a hold tight enough to leave bruises. You look up to me with defiance in your eyes as you struggle against my hold, but underneath the defiance there is a depth and I can see this depth shift and it keeps me prisoner in this sea of fleeting emotions.
We've crossed the line, this invisible barrier we've set a long time ago and I knew it would happen sooner or later. We both knew. Just as be both know now that this shouldn't happen... but it is too late now, isn't it? We can't go back... and we both don't want to...
But you've been mine anyway, haven't you? From the very first day? Just as I have been yours. You put your mark on me, claim me with every touch... even tell the whole world that I'm yours. I mark you, too. I can't let someone else take you away from me. This burning jealousy I feel when someone touches you, the rage when they dare to hurt you... it's consuming. But I understand them, understand that they want you. How can they not? Everything about you is made to be wanted...
That first day... it were your eyes which drew me in. Still do. Those deep, vivid chocolate seas, sparkling with emotions so strong that I feel their current when you look at me and you don't have the slightest idea how much it has cost me all the time not to let go and give in to this current. But now I'm not holding back anymore. Never again.
I force your hands up to pin them above your head and you fight me. Yet not. I know you're stronger than that. It's a part of the little game you play with me tonight, huh? I wonder if you have planned all this or if it just happened because we're on this party and we've both had more drinks than it is safe.
You're a goddamn tease and you know it, play it... play me. You know it's not fair. There is a reason we set the line, agreed not to overstep it, because we need to function around each other, because we couldn't risk to ruin both our careers if we gave in and it wouldn't work. But maybe you couldn't go on like that? Over the past month I felt a pressure weigh down on me heavily, caused by what I feel for you. It grew ever since that first day, locked away deep within me and it has reached the point of being suffocating a long time ago. Maybe you felt that pressure, too? Maybe you couldn't bear it any longer? Just like me...
I keep holding your wrists with one hand only and once again I think that you could free yourself if you really wanted. You don't, stare at me instead, but the defiance fades slowly and I can't help but touch your face. Your eyes soften a little as I run a fingertip along the side of your face, your slightly closing eyes telling me that you like it. I for sure like the feeling your skin under my touch, the mere touch causing electricity to jolt up my arm. It's what you do to me... you... only you... pumping through my veins like liquid fire and I want more, I want it, you, to burn me from within...
With a hiss you arch against me in an attempt to push me away and for the briefest of moments I feel your wrists slip out of my hold, but I grab them harder, bury my free hand in your hair and move in closer, force you back against the wall, because I'm not willed to let you go and the small, oh so small smile that ghosts around your lips tells me that it is what you wanted.
Sassy little bastard.
You close your eyes for a moment and your nostrils flare as you take a deep breath and when you open your eyes again, there is a certain twinkle in them. I have you, it says. Oh yeah, you have me, just as I have you. It's what I will you to read in my eyes as I press close, closer, and I fucking want to slip right under your skin. You have squeezed yourself so deep into my very core, that it would only be fair if you let me in now.
I can feel your heart beat hard, fast against your chest, can feel mine fall into step with yours. A gasp gets stuck in your throat as I shift and press a thigh between your legs, very slowly... keeping my eyes locked with yours because I want to see you... and you part your legs a bit and I feel my blood rush south and heat pool between my legs, feel my cock come to life as a hardness presses into my thigh.
Your hair slip through my fingers like the most wonderful satin as my hand travels down to your neck and over your chest, and I love the way your breath hitches, escaping through slightly parted lips which look much too delicious. And those abs... tempting as they jump under my fingers. Slowly I bring my face even closer to yours and your hot breath fans over my skin. The heavy scent of whiskey lies in it.
My finger curl into your shirt that rides up a bit and exposes a thin line of skin. You shiver as I touch you there and your eyes close at the touch, your head falls back against the wall and I follow, bring my face close to yours again. I breathe you... and your unique, addictive scent mingles into the scent of whiskey that still lingers in my nose and it's intoxicating...
A tiny sound falls from your lips... my name, like a plea... I feel you move against me, not to push me away again, but to bring me closer as you hook a leg behind mine as you arch into me... and I can't help but moan when you roll your hips and brush your cock hard against mine. My hand drops to your ass, squeezes the firm flesh to hold you tight against me as I grind against you, once, twice, forcefully and those breathy little sounds you breathe right into my ear cause the fire deep within me to flare.
You whisper to me, beg me to give your hands free, to allow you to touch me. I draw back a little and seek your eyes which are almost black now, the full blown pupils leaving only a thin ring of that rich brown, but it makes them deep, so very, endlessly deep... and I want to drown in them. In you. It's what I tell you and once more I feel you shiver.
Again you say my name, a breathy moan and a promise and I let go of your wrist, wanting nothing more than to rip your shirt off your body, because I need to touch the perfection which lies hidden underneath. But you're faster as you push me away just enough to slip out of the offending piece of fabric and the next thing I know is that my shirt follows yours, landing in some obscure corner. I feel your hands in my hair almost immediately and I'm being pulled against you roughly. And finally I can touch that skin which has peeked out under your shirt so goddamn tantalizingly. It's hot, soft and just too good and my hands roam, feeling every reachable inch, feeling you twitch and your muscles move underneath. There is a moan and I'm not sure who it has come from, but fuck, I don't care. All I want is more...
Your lips on my neck, eager... your tongue, exploring... little stings as you gently bite, kiss and lick your way further down, your hands following, travelling over my chest and my abs and my sides, mapping, caressing... setting me on fire with every touch and soon I feel fingertips trail over the black lines on my arm as you feel the barely traceable scars. And then your lips ghost over my shoulder, joining your fingers, causing my eyes to close against my will. The featherlight touch of your lips sends a wave of goosebumps all over my body, and another one as your tongue smoothes over my skin there as if you want to taste the black piece of art.
Faintly I hear a growl, barely there and it takes me a second to realize that it's you. Suddenly there is sharp, hot pain where only a heartbeat before your lips have hovered. I hiss as I bring a hand up to your hair, pulling your head back at it and I find a few droplets of blood on your lips and the goddamn hottest smirk I've ever seen. Once again you roll your hips against mine... and my answer is a harsh tug at your hair as I pull you in and finally claim your lips.
And I'm lost. My mind narrows on your lips moving against mine, your tongue as it battles with mine for dominance... and there is the faint taste of whiskey on my tongue and something that's uniquely you and into it mingles the metallic tang of blood. My blood. And you, so very much. And suddenly I feel your hands on my belt, my pants as you...
A groan, a growl maybe... I don't know what exactly passed my lips. I feel my mind shut down slowly and I don't even try to fight it. If I lose my mind now, it's the perfect moment. Your hands are busy on my pants while I ravish your mouth, holding your head in place while my free hand wanders all over that goddamn smooth skin of yours and you've stopped battling for dominance, follow my lead instead.
You surrender. My mind tries to wrap around this very fact. You surrender to me...
My strangled groan, ripped from my throat as your hand closes around my already achingly hard dick, gets lost between our sealed lips, but then you begin to move your hand in a tortouring slow rhythm and your lips, keeping me prisoner, steal my breath and you drink it down greedily. For the longest time all I can do is holding on to you, keep my lips pressed to yours and fuck your goddamn skilled hand. Heat floods me... runs along my spine...
It's my name on your lips then that brings me back eventually. Your hand stills. I don't like it and I show it to you, bringing my hand down to yours to make sure it stays right where it is, and with a low growl I buck my hips, hard. I can feel you grin against my lips... but it's gone the very second I push you back against the wall and press up against you, trapping our hands between us. There is a moan... maybe from you, maybe from me... probably from both of us. Again I grind against you and you join me, the tiny, breathy whimpers which drop from your lips setting a strange something deep within me free. I want to hear them forever... My tongue explores your sweet mouth, dances with your tongue that is as skilled as your hand and suddenly your hand on me isn't enough anymore. I want your mouth on my dick and I want to feel that tongue.
Drawing back I seek your eyes, tell you that I want you to go down on your knees and put your mouth on my cock. If possible your eyes darken even more. Your breath hitches. And then you obey, slide down my body, our gazes staying locked as you do. Your hands smooth down my sides, tug my pants down and without a moment of hesitation you take me in your mouth. The sensation is so overwhelming that I have to brace my hands against the wall for support, so massive that I can't even breathe for a moment. The wet heat engulfing me, your tongue swirling around my member and I can't do nothing but shove my hips forward because I need to feel more. I hear you grunt quietly and feel your hands come up to my hips, but when I dip my head forward and look down on you, I think that I might lose it any second, seeing you deep-throating me...
You begin to bob your head, licking, sucking me with just the right rhythm and your grip on my hips tightens to hold me in place, fucking torturing me with it. I drop a hand to your head, my fingers once again diving into your hair to force you closer... and I can feel you smile.
One of your hands leave my body, sneaks down your own to open the fly of your jeans and you touch yourself, slowly pump your hand in the same rhythm you bob your head. Your muffled moans vibrate through me. Feeling this and seeing you suck me while touching yourself like this is almost too much and I already feel like I'm about to explode.
My fingers curl into your hair. I pull you up and your hiss tells me that it was a bit too forceful maybe, but it fits the moment, doesn't it, and I clash our lips together, bite down harshly on your bottom lip and the pained little moan you reward me with tastes wonderful. As wonderful as your seductively darkened eyes are as you look at me. That need in me, it spikes...
Fuck me, you whisper. The hair on my neck raise... my mind shuts down. The next thing I know is that I rip your jeans down while you stand bend forward with your hands braced against the wall and the half pained, half savoring gasp you give me when I shove my fingers into your unprepared ass makes my cock twitch in anticipation. You push back against my hand as I curl my fingers inside you, seeking for that very spot. The long, deep moan that falls from your lips, descending to a harsh breath tells me I have found it.
Again you push back against my fingers and grunt my name and I can't hold back any longer. I withdraw my fingers, spit on my hand and slick my cock up and grab your hips hard. With on swift thrust I shove my cock inside you until I'm buried to the hilt. I lean forward, bury my face between your shoulderblades to muffle the groan that escapes my mouth at the sensation of being in you, the silken feeling, the incredible heat, the way you're clenching around me... and I can't even find a word for what this is causing within me... all I know is that I've never felt anything like this before, that I want to feel this forever. My fingers on your hips tighten to keep you from moving, as I try to keep myself from cuming.
My heart beats heavily. My mind cries in victory. And my body demands to finally move. You're mine. You have always been. And now that I have claimed you, a hunger for you unfurls in me, one that has been ignore much too long and nothing and no one on this world is ever going to take you away from me again...
MINE.
Faintly I hear you breathing, fast and stuttering, and a voice in the back of my head makes itself know, tells me that you're probably in pain due to practically no preparation and lube and my bruising hold on you. Although I can barely hold back, I do, somehow, and ask you if you are alright, run my hands soothingly along your sides. There is a thin sheen of sweat covering your skin, making it even more feel like satin to my touch. After what feels like a little eternity, I feel a certain tension that I haven't even realized has been there drain out of you, feel you relax around me. And then there is a wordless nod from you.
I begin to move in you, slow in the beginning as I try to find your sweet spot again. There is a buzzing in my ears from holding back, but after a few thrusts I hear you moan and you arch your back as you push back hard. For the briefest of moments you look back over your shoulder and your eyes, black, deep and hooded, burning, are pure sex. And I let go. Thrusting my hips faster, I allow the lust and need in me to take control, fueled by your increasing breathy noises.
The world around me fades out, leaving only you behind. Your body that engulfes me with its burning heat. Your delicious moans and tiny mewls and whimpers. Your skin under my touch. Your wonderful scent, floating through my mind. Your addictive taste on my tongue.
You. Only you...
Jolts of electricity flood me, bright and entraining, causing me pound into you faster, harder, until your body quakes under my thrusts. My heart pounds so heavy against my chest that I can barely breathe and it pumps you through my veins like liquid fire, setting my whole body in flames. My eyes drink down the way you arch and meet me every time, the way you throw your head back, the way you claw at the wall... the way you fall apart because of me. My hand finds your abandonded cock, my fingers curling around it. With an almost whorish moan tearing from your throat as I begin to move my hand on your hard flesh in the rhythm of my thrusts, one of you hands joins mine, holding on to it as if your life depends on it.
The waves of hot pleasure which roll through me fuel the raging fire in me, the one between my legs even more. It crawls up my spine, curls up in my belly and my lungs. I'm so close, so damn close... and I feel that you're right there with me, feel your heat already becoming tighter around me. I pound into you hard, harder, and suddenly you tense up, before you spasm around my cock and explode in my hand and I follow you. The heat in my belly unfurls, flares in my body as I cum hard, so hard that I see black spots. My name is a hoarse cry on your lips, drowning in my guttural shout that carries your name, echoing through my mind... A full-body shudder rips through both of us and I bury myself as deep as I can in your heat, shoot my essence deep into you...
For a long moment we remain like this, frozen in time, while we both try to catch our breaths, but when I feel your knees give way under you, I wrap my arms around you and pull you back against my chest and you bring your hands up, holding on to them. You're trembling in my hold and I know I'm trembling, too, while waves of the aftermath roll through us both. I'm still buried in you and between all the whirling emotions, the mind-blowing feelings our moment has left unchained in me, emerges something innocent and precious. For the first time in ages, I feel... complete.
But eventually we have to move. The feeling of a loss is sharp for a long second when I slip out of you and you step away from me. Quietness lingers while we get dressed again and that quietness is thick, heavy and tense. I don't know why it is like this, all I know is that shouldn't be like that.
Just when you're about to throw your shirt back on, I trail my fingers along the ink on your spine in a tender caress, fulfilling myself a wish I have harbored for so long now. My fingertips tingle as they brush over the barely traceable scars. You shudder, then stiffen, but you keep silent. There is awkwardness filling up the small space between us. Gently I put a hand on your shoulder, turn you around to read your eyes and what I see there is uncertainty, maybe even a bit fear and it dawns on me that you're not sure if I think about this, us, as an one-time thing.
It is not and I tell you this. And I've been right. The awkwardness vanishes as fast as it has come and something shifts in your eyes. My heart trips. I gaze down on you in awe, because I see you, the man I've fallen in love with. Beautiful beyond words. Framing your face with my hand I take in a softness that wants to be touched lying in your features and your eyes, bright, sparkling and the perfection of warmth glowing in them. There is this cute little smile on your lips, one I need to taste...
I kiss you, cover your lips firmly with my own and brush my tongue over your bottom lip, before gently sucking, nibbling at it. With a sigh you wrap your arms around my wais and part your lips, drinking down my pleased hum. Your tongue meets mine, but there's no battle, only a graceful dance. There is a sweet ache growing in my chest... This kiss... it is so much different from the ones before. This kiss is a kiss. I can feel you, all of you in it. There is the flavor of trust in it, of a long harbored need. It is as sunny as your beautiful smile and as rich as your eyes. It's sweet, so unbelievably sweet and addictive, heavy with unrestraint affection. It's warm, just like your touch and full of joy and all of this makes my body hum and my heart sing. Huh, as cheesy as it sounds, it feels like an orchestra of angels is playing in my heart.
You have squeezed yourself into my very core and now I know I have done the same. I'm there with you. I can feel it. And I'm home.
When the kiss breaks evenutally, all I can do is gaze at you. The moment of pent up feelings being freed is over now and although I know there has never been a chance for our first time to be romantic, not after all this time of holding back, of being frustrated to a level that has been more than not healthy, I feel guilt and regret about how it has happened. Your eyes though tell me it's okay. I want to believe it, yet the next time I want to taste more of you. The next time I want to see your face, your eyes. The next time... we're gonna make love. It's what I swear to myself while your rich chocolate seas do what they always do, draw me in, keep me prisoner and the current in them is stronger than ever. I reach into that current, let myself being pulled away, pulled down and I willingly drown in them. From now on and forever. Because this, we… are perfect. This is the forever-kind of thing. Maybe I say it aloud or maybe you read it in my eyes. It doesn't matter, as long as you know it.
I love you.
A/N
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... and a review here? *winks*