Author's Note: This story is a song fic I wrote while the second season of Roswell was on the air. All the songs are by Michelle Branch. This fic startsright after A Roswell Christmas Carol and takes off from there. This is all about Max and Tess. Total UC, so you've been warned. Looks at what happens when Tess leaves Roswell. How does her leaving affects those back home and what does she find when she's by herself.

Chapter 1: Everywhere

Turn it inside out so I can see
The part of you that's drifting over me
And when I wake you're never there
But when I sleep you're everywhere
You're everywhere

So some would say I'm obsessed with Max Evans … and they would be right. I really can't help it. He's beautiful and, he's who I was meant to be with. It's not just mental. It's like a chemical reaction. He's in my blood and I'm in his … he just doesn't realize it yet.

Just tell me how I got this far
Just tell me why you're here and who you are
'Cause every time I look
You're never there
And every time I sleep
You're always there

Do you realize how hard it is to live in Roswell? The only good thing is the Valentis. Kyle and Jim are my family and they support me. As much as I want to go back to Antar the hardest thing would be leaving the two of them behind. But sometimes I don't think I can take it here anymore. Max and I have started a kind of awkward friendship but he's so cautious around me it makes me want to scream. Like just the other day I was in the coffee shop

flash "Hey Tess". Tess turned around suddenly in her seat to see Max standing behind her.

"Oh hey Max", Tess said blushing slightly, "Wanna sit down?"

"You sure? You seemed pretty intent on what you were doing"

"I'm just writing some stuff down it's no big deal"

"Stuff?"

"Just some thoughts", Tess shrugged as Max sat down on the couch next to her. The two of them started talking and soon they were both laughing and having a good time until Max suddenly stiffened. Tess looked over her shoulder and saw Liz staring at them through the window of the store. Suddenly, she turned and walked away quickly.

"Liz!" Max called before grabbing his things and running after her.

'Cause you're everywhere to me
And when I close my eyes it's you I see
You're everything I know
That makes me believe
I'm not alone
I'm not alone

It feels like a knife in my heart every single time he runs after her and away from me. Does he even realize how much it hurts? I wish it didn't but when I'm with him it's the only time I feel like I'm home and the minute he runs away I know what it feels like to be an orphan again.

I recognize the way you make me feel
It's hard to think that
You might not be real
I sense it now, the water's getting deep
I try to wash the pain away from me
Away from me

I've taken to long showers everyday. Although it means listening to Kyle's mouth the minute I walk out the bathroom, it's worth it.

flash "You're an alien for God sakes!" Kyle yelled through the bathroom door "Can't you just wave your hand and stop using up all the hot water?!"

"Stuff it Kyle", Tess yelled back, "I'll be out in a sec". Tess emerged from the bathroom with her hair and clothes looking immaculate. The bathroom on the other hand looked like a disaster area.

"Aliens" Kyle muttered walking into the bathroom.

"You better hurry up school starts soon"

At lunch Tess looked around for a place to sit. Usually she ate with Kyle but he had a football meeting today and she was on her own. "Hey Isabel" Tess said walking over to a tree where Isabel sat alone. "Mind if I sit with you?"

"Actually, Tess, I'm having lunch with Alex and Maria and Michael today'

"And Max and Liz?"

"Well we have some things to discuss"

"Anything important?"

"We'll let you know when we need your help. Ok?"

"Sure, Isabel. No problem".

So I ate lunch by myself. And later on I went home and took a long shower.

'Cause you're everywhere to me
And when I close my eyes it's you I see
You're everything I know
That makes me believe
I'm not alone
I'm not alone
I'm not alone
Whoa, oh, ooh, oh

But it's not always bad and those are the times that give me hope. The times when we all get together at Michael's or the Evans' and we watch movies. Or when Isabel asks me to go shopping so she can find just the right outfit for her date with Alex. Or right after we fight some minor battle and for a brief second Max, Michael and Isabel realize what a good team we are.

And when I touch your hand
It's then I understand
The beauty that's within
It's now that we begin
You always light my way
I hope there never comes a day
No matter where I go
I always feel you so

And those times when Max and I are alone. When it's just the two of us and we're studying or laughing or when we're trying to remember where we came from. When he takes my hands in his …

flash "Clear your mind, Max"

"God this is so frustrating"

"'Cause you're letting it frustrate you. Just breathe deep and free your mind". Max reached across their laps and held Tess' hands as he listened to the sound of her voice.

"Remember the ballroom?" she said "The floor was solid and slippery. It reflected the purple sky. I see you walking across the room and you're talking to someone. The two of you seem very familiar with each other"

"Larek!" Max whispered excitedly.

"Yes I think it's him"

"We were talking about me… and the kingdom and then … I looked up and saw – and saw … you", Max said opening his eyes. Tess opened her eyes and saw Max staring at her in astonishment. "It was you"

'Cause you're everywhere to me
And when I close my eyes it's you I see
You're everything I know
That makes me believe
I'm not alone
'Cause you're everywhere to me
And when I catch my breath
It's you I breathe
You're everything I know
That makes me believe
I'm not alone

Tess closed the small hardcover book she was writing in and put it down. She looked around her and was surprised to see that it was so late. The sky was beginning to darken. She sat on "her" bench and watched the sun go down until the pinks turned to purples and finally dissolved into a deep blue. Then she picked up her bag and made her way back to the Valenti's house. Not knowing why she felt this desire to suddenly see Max so she detoured towards the Evans'. Slowly she made her way down the street taking in the sights and sounds of a nighttime Roswell until she reached the Evans' house. Tess walked around the back of the house to Max's window and when she looked in at her room her vision suddenly went blurry.

You're in everyone I see
So tell me
Do you see me?

Max and Liz didn't even look up from their lovemaking. They missed the opportunity to watch Tess' heart break in two.