Disclaimer: The idea is mine but aside from that nah, I own nothing.
Hey, thanks for dropping by. You won't be disappointed; it's jam packed with laughs. Just a quick, funny story I came up with. Read and review! Now, onto the story!
Boys Will Be Boys…
"What did you just ask me to do?" Rouge looked at Knuckles as if he had two heads.
"Come on Rouge, it'll just be for a couple of hours." He pleaded "But it'll only seem like a couple of minutes."
"Yeah, right." Rouge rolled her eyes "Sorry Knux; I don't do kids."
Knuckles and Rouge were taking a small walk through the park. They didn't usually do that and Rouge thought it was odd that Knuckles asked her. She presumed it was because he was going to ask her for a favor but he didn't say anything like that for a while. And just when it seemed like she was wrong he proved her right.
Rouge continued to walk down the path but Knuckles jumped in front in of her. "Please, please, please? Help me out."
"Knuckles, I'm not watching your little nephews."
"If you don't I'll ask someone else."
"Please do." Rouge said.
He mumbled something and then began to tug at his dreads. He was a few seconds from yelling and getting angry but he took a deep breath.
"Rouge…" he started but was cut off.
"You're wasting your breath. I'm not gonna do it." She shook her head "Sorry."
"Please? I never ask you for anything."
Rouge glared at him "That's a lie."
"True, but maybe that'll show you how desperate I am." He grabbed her arm "I'm willing to lie!"
Rouge snatched her arm back "My mind is made up. The last thing I need is some knuckle-headed brats running around my home."
She started to walk again and Knuckles slumped over and slowly followed her. Then he stopped and his frown changed into a grin. He quickly caught up to her.
"What if I pay you?"
Rouge started to say no but she stopped herself. Pay? That was a different story.
"How much we talking about?"
He grinned knowing he got her attention "It'll be worth your wild."
Rouge nodded as she thought about it some more. It wouldn't be that bad. The kids would sleep or read while she watched a movie or something. It would only be a few hours and then Knuckles would return and pay her. That wouldn't be so bad.
"Are they good kids?"
"Of course, they're related to me."
Rouge rolled her eyes "Then why can't you watch them?"
"That's just it, see, I would but I was invited to hang out with Sonic and the gang." He explained.
"Oh? Hang out where?"
"All over the place."
"Like where?"
"Like maybe Sonics house, or the paint ball area, or the basketball court, or maybe Fox's house or Sonics house or maybe the basketball court." He said quickly "But either way I shouldn't take long and besides they're really god kids. I love your purse, is that Gucci?"
Rouge frowned and crossed her arms "Fox's house? Whatcha wanna go to her house for?"
"Sonic said she was having a house party."
"So…I'm supposed to watch your nephews while you go to a wild party?" she asked.
"It's not that wild." He said softly.
"Come on now, I've been to Fox's parties before. They're almost too wild for me. Its gonna start off nice and calm but the next thing you know you're gonna be drunk off soda in the middle of a food fight while some chicks is tryna dance all over you. And knowing you, you'll gladly let them while you try to throw food too."
"Is that what you're worried about?" Knuckles put his arm around her "Seriously babe, you know I only got eyes for you."
She removed his arm "Cheesy."
"Look, I'll have Sonic with me."
She sucked her teeth "Is that supposed to make me feel better? Because it's doing the opposite." She said "Sonic is a party animal; that fool will be passed out in the middle of the floor before everyone's arrived."
"Come on, were not even gonna be there the whole time." He sighed "I promise nothings gonna happen. So do we have a deal?"
Rouge still didn't want him to go but in the end she really didn't care that much.
"Fine."
"Thank you!" he said louder than anticipated "I owe you one."
"Yeah, you do." She said.
Knuckles stopped walking "Well, its getting late. I probably should go home."
She stopped too "It's three-thirty."
Knuckles yawned "Really? It's later than I thought. Well, I'll see you tomorrow."
"Wait, is there anything else I need to know about your nephews?" she called out.
Still walking Knuckles replied "They're three little boys that will more than likely stress you out."
"I thought you said they were well behaved."
"They are but boys will be boys."
With that he left and Rouge did too after she mumbled a few words under her breath.
Rouge straightened up her place and made it nice and tidy. She also changed clothes into some gray and white Nike
shorts and a small gray shirt. By the time she was finished with everything there was a knock on the door. She expected to see Knuckles with three little kids behind him but she didn't. Instead there was an echidna with black white beater on and some baggy shorts. He had on shades, a small backpack and a hat and behind him were three echidnas that had facial hair (Not a lot but still) and mischievous looks on their face.
"Hey Rouge, thanks again."
He pushed his nephews a little and they shook hands with Rouge before heading in her house and snooping around.
"What are you wearing?" she asked him.
"Clothes." He smirked "Am I supposed to go naked?"
"You know what I mean. It's hot but not that hot."
"I got a jacket." He took a hoodie out of his backpack.
Rouge noticed the back of the hoodie said Single for the Night. She crossed her arms "Single for the night huh?"
"What? No…no. It's just…just…just referring to the song. You know…by-nevermind. I'm not single for the night, I'm not single period. I just grabbed a random jacket, I'm probably not even gonna use it." He insisted "Here, you keep it. I'm not gonna use it." He handed her the jacket.
Rouge took it "You know…maybe I should go with you."
"No, no, no, no, no! I mean, you have to watch my nephews remember?"
She looked him up and down "Yeah, I remember. I was supposed to watch your little nephews. They have facial hair."
"That's because they're thirteen."
"Thirteen? They can take care of themselves."
"You'd think that wouldn't you? I did too until they burned my house down. And that's when they were nine."
"Knuckles, you said little."
"Yeah, well I meant littler than me."
Rouge clenched her teeth and sighed heavily. She should've known better than to think this would be a stroll through the park; this was gonna be long day. Just before she spoke a car pulled up in front of her drive way. Inside was Silver (who was driving), Jet (who was arguing with Sonic), Sonic (obviously), Shadow (who looked like he didn't want to be there), Espio (who was asleep), and a crazy looking wolf (who was listening to music).
Sonic put down his window "Hey Knuckles, come on, they'll be plenty of time for flirting with girls when we get there."
Knuckles turned around and gave Sonic a sick look while Rouge gave Knuckles a dead one.
"Did I say girls? I mean they'll be plenty of time for flirting with guys when we get there."
This time Knuckles and Rouge (and everyone in the car) gave Sonic a weird look.
"I meant…flirting with-
"Yeah, Sonic, not helping." Silver whispered.
"Alright, I messed up. Can we just go?" he put his window back up.
Knuckles turned back around so that he could give Rouge a goodbye hug and or kiss but he was greeted with slammed door.
"Rouge?" he called out to her.
"Bye. Flirt with a bunch of girls for me."
Knuckles mumbled something and then got in the car and gave Sonic an earful. Rouge stood sourly by the door until she heard the car pull off. Then she realized the boys were gone.
"Hello? Knuckles' nephews?"
Suddenly the three boys appeared in front of her. One was white with a blue cap, the other was red with a black cap and the last was black with an orange cap.
"Alright, so it's nice to meet you." She started "I'm Rouge."
"We know." The black one with the orange cap said.
"Good, just making sure. Okay, now first, what are your names?"
"Didn't Uncle Knuckles tell you?"
"No, your Uncle can be…forgetful at times." She huffed "So what are they?"
The black one with the orange cap spoke up first "I'm Radio, try not to forget."
Rouge gave him a look "I'll try my best…and you?" She looked at blue cap.
"I'm Sacagawea." He said quickly.
"What?"
"My names Twitch."
She took a long look at him "Okay…Radio, Twitch, I think, and…"
The last one did not speak instead he just stared, mouth open, at her chest. Rouge caught on quickly and then turned around as she put on the hoodie Knuckles gave her.
"Single for the night? Is that appropriate? I mean were still minors." Radio smirked.
"This is your Uncles." She glared at him again.
"No need to lie; as long as you're not hitting on me I'm good. Don't get me wrong you're cute and all but I already gots me a woman. Her name's Brittany Spears, you may have heard a song by her once or twice."
Rouge gave him a strange look and then slowly turned her attention back to the red one with the black cap. "Alright, now, your name Mr. Gawk?"
"Uh, I'm Scope."
"Scope?"
"Yeah, you know like the kind he needs to use." Radio grinned. Twitch put his arm on his shoulder and laughed "You got played!" Scope burned up and pushed Radio hard. "Loser!"
"Don't get mad at me punk!" Radio got up and pushed him back.
"Slime ball!"
"Porch monkey!"
"Fart nap!"
"Funk pot!"
"Pig headed bumble nut!"
"What?"
"Grrrr!" Scope jumped on him and they began to fight.
"Stop! Why not watch a movie instead?" Rouge said trying to get them to stop.
"Kinda busy right now!" Radio said trying to put Scope in the headlock. Scope escaped his grasp and punched him.
Rouge was about to pull them apart but Twitch stopped her.
"No, no, no, let them fight. No real damage will be done. This is the perfect time for me to explain to you about us." He rested his arm on her shoulder "Now, first up Radio, probably the worst of us all. Not only is he extremely violent and has a bad attitude but he likes to insult people. When he insults you, note I said when and not if, try not to hurt him. I would encourage you to but Radio is sneaky, he might tell Uncle Knuckles you assaulted him or something. And we all know how gullible he is. Someone actually did jail time because Uncle Knuckles believed one of Radio's lie before. Anyway it might help for you to keep Radio entertained because if you don't he will entertain himself. Got it?"
Rouge stared at him unable to find the right words. She opened her mouth but no words came out. Twitch nodded her head for her.
"Good, next is Scope. He's not a problem like Radio but he is in a different sense. Scope is the type of boy that is girl crazy." He quickly analyzed Rouge "And since you're chesty I'm gonna bet he falls for you. Do a 360 please." He spun her around "Yeah, nice figure, little attitude and cute face; the perfect recipe for love sick Scope. Listen, Scope is sneaky too, probably the sneakiest of us all. He will try to kiss you, no doubt, and get close to you. You'll probably feel uncomfortable and or violated…there's nothing I can do for you. Try your best not to be stuck in the same room alone with him; not good. And it's important for you to guard your lips...and butt for that matter; he might try to slap it. Got it?"
Again Rouge couldn't find the correct words. She tried to speak but Twitch shushed her and, again, nodded her head for her.
"Good. Last but not least, me, Twitch. I'm not bad but I am a handful. I'm very hyper and that's because I just finished off a truck load of junk food. That's why I said my name was Sacagawea. Even without junk food I am a little bit bonkers. Don't think on it too much though; you'd go crazy. My teacher told me so and I quote 'Twitch if I tried to figure you out I'd go insane. You belong in an asylum.' Anyway, I'll probably do something crazy while I'm here. For instance sell or destroy one of your appliances. Sorry in advance. But no matter what it is I do, I'm very obedient, so I'll do what you tell me. I think it's because I'm part dog or something…whatever. Got it?"
Rouge found the right words but before she spoke them Twitch put his hand over her mouth.
"Remember what I told you because this conversation never happened."
After he removed his hand Twitch broke his brothers up. "Come on now, were older than that." He said helping them up.
Rouge decided it would be best if she forgot the incident and started over.
"Okay, Radio, Scope, Twitch lets move on and start over. What would you like to do?" she asked as she prayed they said sleep.
"Wrestle." Radio said flexing.
"Take off our jackets." Scope winked at her.
"Drink some red bulls." Twitch said doing a hand stand.
"Break each others ribs."
"Hug each other."
"Arson."
Yeah, arson."
Kiss each other…and then arson."
Rouge frowned "Can we do something…not physical…or dealing with burning my house down for money you won't even get?"
"Like?" Radio crossed his arms.
"I don't know…sleep?" she said more as a question than demand.
Twitch shook his head like a madman "No, no, no, no, no! No sleeping. I'm way to hyper to sleep."
"It depends," Scope started "Are we sleeping…together?"
"Okay...that was super inappropriate but I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear that."
"Okay, so sleeping's out." Radio said "Next option?"
"Watch a movie." Rouge said.
Radio threw his hands up in frustration "What is it with you and movies?"
Rouge was starting not to like his attitude but she kept it to herself. She took a seat on the couch and the nephews did the same. She then turned on her TV and pulled out her movie case.
"What shall we watch?"
"Something violent." Radio punched his hand.
"Something with love." Scope made his eyebrows go up and down.
"Something short." Twitch squirmed around.
"How about something G-rated?" she suggested.
"G-rated?" Radio repeated shocked "You have g-rated movies?"
Rouge flipped through her movie case but saw not one g rated movie.
"…no, but I could get some…like Nemo right?"
Radio shook his head and closed his eyes. He sighed heavily as he looked at her again. "Look old lady, this wont do. Were thirteen not six, you have to do better. We don't wanna watch a movie about some stupid fish getting lost. We wanna watch movies with guns and fighting and blood."
"…and love." Scope added.
"…and arson." Twitch added.
Rouge ignored Scope and Twitch and frowned at Radio who was starting to work her nerves.
"Uh, look little boy, your attitude wont do. I'm in charge and you're not, I give the commands and you obey them. If you just keep your smart mouth closed them we wont have any problems." She snapped "And I'm not old."
"Whatever." He rolled his eyes.
Twitch stood up and walked past Rouge into her kitchen. As he walked past her he whispered quickly "Here it comes."
Rouge looked at him like he was crazy but before she could follow him his prediction came true.
"Where did Uncle Knuckles find you?" Radio asked "On the corner?"
Rouge, not giving what Twitch said a second thought, grabbed Radio by his shirt and held him in the air.
"What?" she growled.
She took him to her room and threw him on her bed. She then proceeded to close the door as Radio sat up.
"You're pretty strong for an old lady." Radio smoothed out his shirt "Let me remind you that I am a minor."
"I'm not gonna have you insulting me the whole time you're here. I'd sooner kick you out. You better straighten up your act or else."
"Or else what old lady? You can't touch me." He challenged. "I got the law on my side."
"What the law gonna do for you when you six feet under?" she growled "Calm down Rouge, calm down." She sighed "Listen to me and listen well. I don't babysit often, in fact it's rare. But when I do, I don't give a care whose you belong to or anything like that." She pointed at him "But I do care about respect and if I don't get it willingly…I'll get it forcefully. You're lucky I didn't snap your neck and suck your blood."
He looked at her suspiciously "…you some kinda vampire bat?"
"Test me again and find out."
Radio mumbled something under his breath and then crossed his arms and turned his back to her. Rouge smiled glad she won the first battle of many.
"You can come back out when your sour attitude turns sweet."
"I guess I'm never leaving." He spat.
Rouge ignored him as she left the room and took a seat on the couch. Even though she came out of that situation victorious Rouge was still a little heated. So after she took a seat on the couch she forgot Twitch was gone. She didn't even notice Scope scooting closer and closer to her. It finally clicked to her when she noticed him yawning and putting his arm around her. She tried to ignore it but she couldn't any longer after he rested his head on her shoulder.
She pushed him "Alright, enough Scope. No more touching, no more gawking, no more nothing. I'm done."
Scope sat back and then cleared his throat.
"So that's it? It's over for us?"
Rouge narrowed her eyes "What us? I just met you."
"I can't believe you. After all we've been through…the storm and the rain!"
Rouge clenched her teeth "Little boy…"
He shushed her as he put his hand over her mouth "I won't let you go that easily." He then got up and escorted himself to the bathroom.
Rouge angrily started to follow him but she heard a knock. She went to her door and opened it but there was no one there. She heard the knock again and she quickly realized it wasn't coming from her door. She followed the knocking sounds all the way into the kitchen. She frowned when she realized it was coming from her oven.
"Hello?" she asked nervously.
She opened it and out jumped Twitch with her empty sugar jar. He was shaking and there was a wild look in his eyes.
"Twitch?" she asked "How did you...when were…what…who gave…why were you in my oven?"
He looked around suspiciously and whispered "The aliens."
"The what?"
He grabbed her ear and pulled it to his mouth.
"Hey, ouch!" she said.
"The aliens." He repeated still whispering.
"What are you talking about?" She moved away and rubbed her ear.
"You wouldn't understand, so I'll make it short for you." He paused "A long time ago I ran into some aliens and borrowed a dollar. I never paid them back and now they've come back to collect. I have to pay them back before I leave or else."
"Or else what?"
"I'm not trying to find out." He blinked several times.
"Okay…Twitch…I think your teacher might have been on to something…"
"Do you have a dollar?" he asked suddenly.
Rouge reached in her pocket but all she pulled out was a piece of gum, lint and three pennies.
"Sorry."
"No problem; I'll just make a dollar some other way." He ran out the room quick.
Rouge was about to follow him but she heard a crash. It sounded like it came from her bedroom so she entered it. She was surprised to see her flat screen face down on the floor and her window open. She walked in, mouth open, and slowly but surely she felt her temper rising. But then she saw Radio wasn't in the room and she looked out the window. She didn't see him so she left her room and went to open her front door. Before she even stepped out she saw him sitting against the wall talking on his phone.
"Done and done Bunker." He grinned.
"You broke it that fast?"
"I'm a pro at this, you should know."
Rouge then stepped out and stared at him. At first he didn't notice but when he did a shocked look appeared on his face. The look went away quick though and a rebellious one took its place.
"Spare me the lecture." He walked back in the house.
"You owe me 700 bucks," she started.
She was about to follow him but she saw Twitch running towards her with a purse in his hand.
"Twitch?"
"Get down!"
He ran in and pulled her inside the house slamming the door behind him. He pulled her down just as four arrows hit the door and went halfway through. Then a large knife went halfway through the door as well
"What in the he-"
Twitch shushed her and waited for a minute. He then started digging through the purse. He wasn't shaking anymore but he still had a wild look in his eye.
"Sorry about your door. I didn't realize they were in archery class."
"Who? What are you talking about? And why are there arrows and knifes in my door?"
"I robbed an old lady." He said "She was in archery class…I'm not sure where the knife came from though."
"Twitch you can't go around robbing old people."
"Drastic times call for drastic measures." He said pulling out some mace.
"Listen to me," she grabbed his arms "Aliens aren't real…you don't owe them a dollar…and you have to return that."
A scared look appeared on his face "Please, no! The old lady told me if she ever saw me again she'd beat me with her walker."
"You should've thought about that before."
"At least let me wait until archery class is over?" he pleaded.
Rouge shot him a look.
"Alright, fine, I'll return it." He opened the door "But if something happens to me you're the one who's gonna owe the aliens instead of me."
With that Twitch ran out the door and Rouge shook her head. Before the day was over she probably was gonna have a heart attack and it was all because of Twitch, Radio and…Scope! She forgot about Scope. Rouge walked over to the bathroom and knocked on the door.
"Hello? Scope?" she said "Having a hard time?"
Suddenly the door opened but nobody was inside. Rouge went inside looked around but still saw nobody.
She put her hands on her hips "Scope?"
The door closed.
"Right here, my love."
Rouge turned around and saw Scope, who was hiding behind the door.
"Okay, uh, I was just checking up on you…and you're okay so I'm just gonna go now."
Scope leaned against the door and then locked it.
"Scope…were older than this." She backed up.
He laughed "I told you I wasn't gonna let you go that easily, did I not?"
"Okay, wait, I'm the one in charge remember?"
"Do you hear that?" he stopped.
"What?"
"That…that's the sound of no one caring." He grinned.
He started towards her and she looked around for something to hit him with. She ended up grabbed a bar of soap.
"This is your last chance." She warned.
He laughed again "Soap? What, are you gonna wash me?" he grinned devilishly "Save that for later."
Rouge frowned and threw the soap at him. It hit him on his head and he stopped and rubbed the spot where it hit him.
"Ouch." He frowned and then smiled "That's okay...I like 'em feisty."
Rouge rolled her eyes and took a deep breath. She was about to hurt him but suddenly he stopped. He turned around and headed for the door.
"What are you doing?"
"I'm letting you out, this is getting boring."
"Seriously?" she asked cautious.
"Nope!"
He turned back around and jumped on her causing them both to fall. He tried to kiss her and Rouge struggled for a few minutes but then she kicked him somewhere that made grown men cry. He rolled off of her in pain and hunched over. Tears welled up in his eyes and he bit his tongue.
Rouge picked him up and carried him out the bathroom and set him on the couch. She then remembered Radio and decided to pay him a visit. When she opened her bedroom door she regretted it. Her jaw was on the ground because of what she saw.
There was Radio, standing on her bed, dressed in her clothes (which were very tight on him so much so the clothes were beginning to rip) posing with his phone in his hand as if he was about to take a picture.
"I can explain." He started.
"No need…you're obviously cross dressing!"
"No…well, yeah but not because I wanted to. You see, my friend Bunker and I are playing truth or dare and I never choose truth."
"Get outta my clothes!"
"Wait, I have to take the picture to prove I did it."
"Now!" she yelled.
"Alright!" he said jumping off her bed and backing up "Your clothes are coming off."
He started trying to take the shirt off really slow. She closed the door and charged at him.
"You wanna go any faster Ms. Daisy?"
"Hey, if I go faster it might rip. Is that what you want?"
"No, I want you to finish taking off my clothes!"
"Don't rush me…this is a delicate process."
"Delicate my eye!" she started pulling the shirt off of him.
"Ouch! Take it slow! Hey, you're being too rough!" he yelled "Are you trying to kill me?"
As she struggled pulling the shirt off of him the door opened and Twitch popped his head in.
"What do you want?" Rouge growled.
"Nothing, I just wanted to see what was going on." He grinned "Because it doesn't sound too G rated from out there."
She was about to say something but she stopped when she saw his face. One of his eyes was swollen shut, a piece of his ear was gone, the side of his head was bleeding, a few of his teeth were missing, his fur was messed up and his clothes were dirty.
"What happened to you?" she asked forgetting about Radio.
"Long story." He then left and closed the door.
Rouge looked at Radio and hissed "I have to go but I want you outta my clothes. When you get them off wash them, iron them, fold them neatly…and then set them on fire!"
With that she left and went to see about Twitch. When she walked out she noticed Scope was gone. She sighed heavily and rubbed her temples but then she frowned at what was in his place. There were seven babies on his couch and Twitch was standing beside the couch watching them. A turtle, a lion, a duck, a hedgehog, a bat, a puppy, and a raccoon. The babies were all different species.
"Why are these kids in my…" she then saw his appearance again "What happened to you?"
"I told you before, that old lady beat me with her walker. Who knew old people were so strong? I didn't even get a lick in. Especially after she shot me with those arrows. Speaking of which," he pulled one out of his leg "She even had enough strength to call her old lady friends who proceeded to beat the life out of me." He looked around suspiciously "But honestly, I think they were allies with the aliens."
Rouge lost interest when he spoke of the aliens "What are these kids doing in my house?"
"Isn't it obvious? I'm babysitting them for a dollar." He said happily.
Rouge growled "You can't babysit them, especially when you're being babysat! Where are the parents?"
"Its parent, drop the s, and she lives around the block."
"How can it be parent? All these babies are different species."
"You asked me as if I knew the answer." He said.
She sighed "Return them…now."
"Come on." he whined.
"All seven of them, now."
"Seven?" his ear twitched "I brought eight."
"What?"
Twitch quickly examined all the babies.
"Icy." He slammed his fist against the couch "I knew I shouldn't have blinked."
"What do you mean Icy?"
"That's the kangaroo, he must've ran, er, jumped away while I wasn't paying attention."
"Are you serious?"
"Unfortunately," he sighed "look, I'm sure he just ran upstairs. I'll bring him back…stay here."
Twitch quickly ran up her stairs and left her alone. Rouge looked at the babies who looked at her as well. They stared at each other for a minute until finally the babies broke the silence and started crying.
"What? No, don't cry…don't cry. Cheer up…please?"
They continued to cry and Rouge looked around the room for something that would end their cries. Instead when she looked around she saw a small kangaroo in a diaper sitting at the bottom of the steps watching her. Rouge started for him and he stood up.
"Wait, no, I'm the good guy. You can come here. It's okay."
She went closer but he started to back up. When she reached for him he started up the stairs. She quickly chased him down the small hall but lost him. When she turned around she saw him at the top of the stairs and he winked at her.
Rouge ran for him but Twitch suddenly walked out of a room and stepped in her way. She crashed into him causing them both to fall.
"Rouge?"
"Get up! I saw him, he was jumping and winking…and stairs." She scrambled to her feet.
"You left the kids?" Twitch asked alarmed.
"I saw Icy." She said out of breath.
"I could've caught him but since you left the other kids," Twitch ran down the stairs "they're all gone."
The couch was empty and when Rouge saw she was baffled.
"How could they be gone? I just left them."
Twitch sighed and put a hat on that looked just like Indiana Jones' and took out a rope.
"Looks like I'm going baby hunting."
Rouge frowned "Where'd you get that hat and rope?"
"I keep one near just in case of a situation like this."
He walked into the kitchen and Rouge followed him.
"That makes no sense…you thought you might lose eight babies while being babysat?"
He reached into her cabinet and pulled out a bag of sugar. Then he dumped it all into his mouth and swallowed it. The crazy look reappeared in his eyes and the shakes were worse than before.
"When you have aliens after you, you think outside the box." He patted her back "I'll be back with the kids…dead or alive."
He ran off and Rouge was getting hot so she decided to splash some water on her face. She went into the bathroom and found herself in the same predicament she was in before. When she walked in the door closed and Scope was behind it.
"De Ja Vu?"
"Kinda but the ending will be different this time." He pushed her down on the toilet seat "Sit."
Rouge was surprised he pushed her "Boy, I don't know what's gotten into you but you should think about how much you value your life before you do that again."
"I've heard worse threats from a child." He said "Now shut up!"
Rouge stared at him, in shock he just said that "Why are you talking to me like you lost all of your common sense?"
"Didn't I say be quiet? Do you want me to hit you?"
"Go ahead." She dared him "I won't regret a thing."
He put his hand over her mouth "Close your trap so I could explain."
Rouge slapped his hand off her face "Boy…"
"Do you ever shut up?" he sighed "I'm gonna fix that."
"Let me out of this bathroom before I do something illegal."
"I'll let you out when I'm good and ready…besides…I might do something illegal anyway." He smiled and then cleared his throat "Bad boys don't obey their woman…their woman obeys the bad boy."
"…number one, I'm not your woman and number two, who told you that you were a bad boy? They lied."
"You don't understand, I figured you out. You females are so difficult to explain with your moodiness and attitude and feelings but I figured you out." He grinned "You didn't like me when I was nice and a gentleman."
"Nice and a gentleman is trying to force me to kiss you in the bathroom?"
"Let me finish woman." He said "You didn't like me then so I figured you must like bad boys. But then I said to myself Uncle Knuckles isn't a bad boy so why are you dating him? And I came to the conclusion that you're using him because you really like Shadow."
"What?"
"Yeah, I know, I thought it was dumb at first too but then the signs clearly pointed to it. Just so you know I heard rumors about Shadow and some illegal things so you better watch your step. Anywho I said that you found your way into my heart so I would do what was best for you even if that meant changing into someone I'm not. So, here I am…bad boy Scope."
"Scope…that was the stupidest thing I ever heard in my life." She just stared at him "Seriously, I don't think I've ever heard anything dumber than what I just heard."
Scope leaned against the wall and smiled.
"Or are you just mad I figured you out?"
"No, I've honestly never heard something as foolish as what you just said." She shook her head "That was just really stupid."
Scope frowned "That's enough, don't insult me again or else."
"Or else what? What are you going to do Scope?"
He started towards her but she raised her leg as if she was going to kick him again.
He grinned "What? You're gonna kill our future kids again?"
She huffed "Let me out."
He was about to say something but then a movement behind the shower curtain caught his eye.
"Hey, what's that?" he asked her.
"I'm not falling for another one of your tricks."
"No, seriously."
He walked over and opened the curtain; he was surprised to see a baby bat crawling around in the tub.
"You got a kid?" he looked at her like she was crazy.
Rouge stood up "There's one, I hope Twitch found the others."
Twitch picked the kid up "Its got your wings."
Rouge glared at him "Shut up and give it here."
He handed her the baby and Rouge looked at the baby girl bat. She was adorable the way she was sucking on her thumb. Rouge smiled and so did the baby…but then the baby threw up on her.
"Oh my God!" she threw the baby, literally.
Luckily Twitch caught her "Hey, what's the matter with you? You cant throw a baby…you're a poor mother."
Rouge rushed out the bathroom and ran for her room. She saw Radio about to stick a paper clip in the outlet but she ignored him and ran into her room. Quickly she took her shirt off and threw it across the room. She then opened her closet and tried to find something else to wear.
"Ahhhhhhhhh!" Radio screamed.
Rouge rolled her eyes and continued looking. While searching the kangaroo busted in her room through the window. It started jumping on her bed and even though she was surprised Rouge ignored it and continued searching for another shirt. She'd worry about that when she was fully dressed. Unfortunately Twitch came through her window as well.
"Oh my God!" she cried again when she saw Twitch.
Twitch ignored her and jumped for Icy who dodged him.
"Twitch get out!"
"Why?" he asked still trying to catch the kangaroo.
"I'm changing my clothes!" she shouted.
Twitch looked at her momentarily "Oh, yeah, you are, aren't you? Nice abs." then he continued to reach for Icy.
Icy ran around the room and Twitch dove and dived for him but each time he missed. Finally Icy ran and jumped behind Rouge and Twitch stopped in front of her.
"Twitch get out!"
He looked at her again "Your biceps could use a little work; you're starting to get flabby."
Rouge kicked him in the same place she kicked Scope before but oddly Twitch didn't fall.
"Normally I would be in tears, rolling on the floor…but I'm so high on sugar I cant feel a thing…but by the way that kick looked I'm gonna feel it later."
"Get out!" she shouted again.
"Fine."
He sighed and walked to the door. Then he used his rope to grab Icy and pulled him to him. He laughed menacingly and ran out the room shutting the door behind him. Rouge shook her head and quickly finished changing her shirt. She was afraid to leave her room but she knew she had to. As soon as she opened the door a plate just missed her head and flew passed her breaking on the wall.
"Yes! I did it, bring it on Bunker!"
"Excuse me, you almost hit me."
"And?" Radio shrugged and walked away.
Rouge rolled her eyes and saw Scope talking to Twitch. Scope still had the baby in his hands. She walked over to them.
"Yeah Twitch, she just threw the baby as if it was an inanimate object."
"That sounds like her." He shook his head.
"I can't be with someone who abuses their children."
"Then it's a good thing that bat's not Rouges."
"What?"
"Twitch, please say you got all the kids." Rouge looked at him.
"Now that Scope found the bat, our mission is complete." He said.
Twitch snatched the bat from Scope.
"Uh…yeah, where are they?"
"Oh, I put them in the oven." He then threw the baby inside the oven quickly.
Rouge hesitated "Why?"
"So they don't escape again. The sugar rush is beginning to wear off and I don't have the energy to find them all again."
"So you put them in my oven…how'd you expect to return them?"
He patted Scope on the shoulder "Scope here is going to help me carry the oven around the block to the parent."
"I am?"
"Yes…yes you are."
Rouge sighed "I'm too exhausted to complain so hurry up."
Twitch grinned and then grabbed one side of the oven while Scope grabbed the other.
"Farewell my love." Scope called out as they began to carry it.
"Whatever." She said following them.
She watched them carry it out her back door and then down her driveway. Suddenly Twitch stopped and dropped the oven.
"Twitch?" Scope said.
His jaw dropped and he fell to the ground. He began rolling around in what looked like agony.
"Twitch?" Rouge called out suddenly alarmed.
"…sugar rush ended…so effects of…kick earlier…really hurts…need ice pack…" he whispered through the tears.
Rouge rolled her eyes and crossed her arms, remembering why she kicked him. She glanced at her broken window and then saw Radio. He was standing over a huge anthill with her hose in his hand. She walked over to him.
"I wouldn't advise it." He said in a sing song voice.
He huffed "I don't care what you advise. This is one of my final dares."
Rouge smiled and backed up a great distance "Can't say I didn't warn you."
"Old lady, please? I know what I'm doing, I'm a professional."
Rouge smiled as she knew what was coming next. Radio turned the hose on and put it in the anthill. After a few seconds a bunch of drowning floated to the top.
"What? I told you." He grinned triumphantly.
"Uh-huh." She took another step back "Did you see what color the ants were?"
He looked at the ants and frowned.
"Red." She whispered.
Radios eyes widened and before he could take off a bunch of red ants exploded into the air from the anthill. They jumped on Radio and he started running.
"Ah!" he yelled "It hurts like crazy!"
More ants crawled on him as he ran in a circle. Rouge laughed.
"Payback is a biscuit eating bulldog, eh?" she asked him.
After a few minutes of suffering, Rouge put him out of his misery by using the hose on him. The ant came off with the water and a bunch of red bumps were all over Radio. He looked at Rouge and then at his body…then he fainted from the pain.
Rouge rolled her eyes and brought him in the house. She set him on the couch and then dumped some water on his face. He woke up immediately and then glared at Rouge.
"The red ants must pay." He said softly.
He then got up and ran to the front door. He opened it and then dashed to the back yard again. Rouge wasn't going to follow him because something caught her eye. She stared out the front door. There in her yard was Scope and Twitch dancing. Scope was break dancing, or at least trying to, on her oven and Twitch was dancing beside the oven on the stop sign pole.
Rouge face palmed and wondered why she was even going to ask. As she got closer to the boys she saw they were beat up looking.
"Okay, I'll probably regret asking but why does it look like you two were in a fight?"
"Well, we were." Twitch sighed "It turns out the old lady from earlier was those kids grandma. She recognized me immediately and started beating me again. Then the mom joined in because she didn't like the idea of her eight kids in an oven."
Rouge nodded "Sadly, I believe you. Next, why are you dancing like you were born in the streets and why is Scope dancing like he was born on a pole? And on my oven at that?"
"You like my moves, yes?" Scope grinned "I can teach you the ways. Always remember…stripper up the pole and fireman down."
Rouge took a deep breath and faced Twitch again, wanting an answer.
"Oh, right. Well, the lady didn't pay me so I'm still in debt. So I decided to sell your oven for a buck." He nodded "Scope here was helping me advertise."
Rouge frowned "You can't sell my oven?"
"Why not?" Twitch asked.
"Hm. Maybe because it's mine!" she started to yell.
"Calm down baby, it's all good." Scope patted her back.
Rouge shot him a look "Touch me again…it's your funeral."
"Rouge?" Radio called from behind her.
She turned around and Radio greeted her with a kiss. She was confused and she let out a mean growl. Radio jumped back and then put his phone to his ear.
"Does this make you happy Bunker? Brittany's gonna be so mad."
He walked away but before Rouge could respond Scope pushed him.
"What the French toast is your problem?" Radio growled.
"Don't you kiss her! She's mine!"
"Shut up you worthless pile of filth." Radio huffed "You push me again and your dead meat."
"You kiss her again and your dead meat."
"Anybody who kisses me again is gonna take a trip to the hospital."
Neither of them paid any attention to her. They were staring each other down. Suddenly Radio looked away.
"I don't have time for this. The red ants must pay." He started to walk away.
"That's what I thought."
Radio turned back around and glared at his brother. Then he walked over and kissed Rouge again.
"That's it!" Scope punched him.
They began to fight and Rouge wanted to join in but she forgot about Twitch. She turned around and saw him waving to a truck driving off with an oven in the back.
"Bye Mr. Rank!" he called out.
"You didn't!" Rouge ran over to him.
"I did." Twitch grinned.
Rouge's eye twitched and she felt her blood pressure rising as well as her temper.
"But he doesn't get paid until next week so he told me he'll give me the dollar later."
Rouge took deep breaths "You sold my oven…for free?"
"You can't get mad; I apologized in advance, remember?"
Rouge then looked back at the two boys fighting and then back at Twitch. She then closed her eyes and fainted; the stress being a little too much for her.
When she awakened she was on the couch and she felt heat on her stomach. The heat felt as hot as fire so she jumped.
"Hey!" she looked around.
She saw Twitch standing next to her with an iron in his hand.
"What are you doing?" she asked.
Twitch sighed, relieved "Glad you're awake."
"Are you burning my stomach?" she asked, startled.
"Not necessarily; let me explain." He took a deep breath "You passed out so I brought you in the house. For a second I thought you died so we got scared. I had to tie my brothers up just in case they'd snitch. I cannot go to jail again."
"Again?"
"Long story. So then I remembered that when someone died, I saw on a doctor show, they use those zappy things on their heart to bring them back alive. You don't have zappy things so I used an iron instead and I put it on your stomach so you wouldn't be uncomfortable."
Rouge shook her head "I don't know what to say."
"A thank you would be nice."
"I mean I don't know what to say at your funeral!" she jumped at him.
Twitch easily dodged her and took a step back.
"Hey! What's your problem? I tied those two energetic hoboes up for you and I brought you back to life."
Rouge thought about it for a moment "Your right, I'm sorry. Thank you for bringing me back to life Twitch."
"No problem." He grinned.
"Now where's the rope you used to tie them up?"
"Right here." He pulled it out of nowhere.
Rouge nodded and took it "Great, now can you do a 360?" she spun him around and tied him up as well.
"Hey!"
"I've put up with way too much today." She finished tying him up and then put him in her bedroom with the other boys.
Then she laid down on the couch and went to sleep. She was exhausted and just hoped Knuckles was on his way.
When she woke up she was in her bedroom on the floor…and she was tied up.
"What the-" she looked around.
The room was empty except for her and Scope lying on her bed.
"About time you woke up." He sighed.
"How are you free and I'm not?"
"You must not have got your rope tying badge because Twitch got away and freed us."
She sighed "Awesome."
"I know…especially for me." He grinned "Now I can kiss you without the struggle."
Rouge squirmed, knowing he was right.
"Scope…" she started.
"Save it." He jumped off her bed.
He started for her until the door opened. In walked Radio and he closed the door behind him. He had a tazer in his hand.
"Release the beast." He demanded.
"Release?" Scope asked shocked.
"The beast?" Rouge growled.
"Yes, my final dare is to stick an electric eel in my pants and she doesn't have any." He looked at Rouge "Beast, you will drive me to the store and buy me eels."
"That's suicide man." Scope shook his head "You're taking this dare thing a bit too far."
"Am I? Release the beast Scope. I have a tazer."
"Stop calling me that!"
"Release the beast!"
Scope untied her and then darted out the door. It was just Radio and Rouge now. Rouge stood up and growled.
"You, sir, are about to get the beating of your life." She charged at him.
Radio jumped out the way and then raised the tazer up, threateningly. Rouge kicked it out of his hands and then took him down.
"Help!" Radio yelled.
"Where's the law now!" Rouge asked.
Then the door opened and Twitch stuck his head in.
"Radio I'm gonna need some help with plan Tra-" he stopped when he saw Rouge free. "Who freed her?"
"Radio ordered me to." Scope said from behind him.
"You…" Rouge stood up and started for Twitch.
Twitch slammed the door and ordered Scope to hold the knob so she couldn't escape.
"Let me out!" she demanded.
"No can do, love." Scope said.
Rouge gave up after a while and then Radio stood up. Rouge grabbed the tazer in case but Radio wasn't worried.
"Let me out Scope."
He hesitated "Sorry."
"Come on, seriously." He paused "If she gets out let her, she can't stop the plan. It's already in progress."
"But Twitch said-"
"But Twitch said…" he mocked his brother "Is Twitch your mama?"
After a few minutes of silence the door opened. Both Radio and Rouge got out. On the way out Scope slapped Rouge's bottom.
He shrugged "I can't help myself."
Rouge was too weak to do the damage she wished so she just tazed him instead. Then she threw the tazer down and followed Radio into the living room.
"Where is Twitch?"
"He's carrying out the plan." He rubbed his hands together devilishly.
"What plan?" she frowned.
"This doesn't concern you so you don't need to know."
Radio took a seat on the couch and Rouge glared at him. Scope walked slowly out there and then also took a seat on the couch.
"You know, that just wasn't nice love."
Rouge ignored him and then she walked into her kitchen. Everything was still in place…well, everything except the oven. She walked back out to see a smile on Radio's face.
"I told you, it doesn't concern you."
Rouge was about to get angry but then she heard a sound. It came from the bathroom. She grinned at Radio and then walked towards it. Radio jumped up and stood in front of the door.
"No. You mustn't enter until the plan is finished."
"Listen boy, I've been through hell and back today so you better get outta my way before I commit a crime."
He sighed "If you really wish to see the plan."
"What is this plan you keep talking about?"
"Plan tramp." He said which caused Rouge to stop.
"Plan tramp? I hope it doesn't have anything to do with how it sounds."
Radio smiled and then moved out of her way. She opened the door and her jaw immediately went to the floor. The tub was full of water and there was a bunch of red ants in it. Drowning red ants. And there was Twitch, standing over the water witch a toaster in his hands. A plugged in toaster.
"Plan tramp: The Red Ants Must Pay." Radio said softly from behind her.
Rouge's body was aching and she was exhausted from the whole day. Seeing that just made her feel even worse. Twitch stared at Rouge, still holding the toaster.
"I can't do it…I just can't do it." She sighed.
Rouge walked over and took the toaster from Twitch and then slammed it against his head. Twitch fell over onto the floor and Rouge started for Radio.
"Whoa old lady, you can't hit me."
"Screw the law." She slammed it against his head.
Then she hit unsuspecting Scope in the head. After that she tied the boys up extra hard and then put them in her bedroom. Then she proceeded to lay down on the couch again. And she didn't wake back up until she heard a knock on the door. Then she walked over and opened it. There stood Knuckles.
"Hey Rouge." He extended his arms.
Rouge glared at him.
"I love the greeting I just received; it made me feel welcome." He said sarcastically.
Rouge walked over to her bedroom door and then gestured for him to follow her. Knuckles raised his eyebrow and Rouge rolled her eyes.
"What are you suggesting?" he asked.
"I'm suggesting you get these three loons outta my house!"
Knuckles frowned and then Rouge went in and freed the awake boys. They walked back over to the door and Knuckles stopped.
"How were they?"
The three boys shot her a pleading look. Rouge thought about ratting them out but in the end she just didn't care.
"Fine."
"Just like I told you." He smiled "Give Aunt Rouge a hug."
Rouge grimaced and Radio gave her a quick hug.
"You're not half bad."
Rouge nodded and the Scope gave her a long hug.
"Yeah, that's enough hugging." Rouge pushed him a little.
Scope kissed her quick and then took off out the door behind Radio. Rouge growled at the fact that Knuckles wasn't paying attention. Then Twitch gave her a nice hug.
"We should do this again sometime."
Rouge couldn't say what she wanted to so she just nodded and said goodbye. Then Knuckles began to follow Twitch out but Rouge stopped him.
"Where do you think you're going?"
"Home?"
"Yeah, after I get my money."
"Is that all you care about?" he asked.
"Do you want me to be honest?"
Knuckles sighed and pulled out his wallet. He then pulled a white piece of paper out that said I O U.
"What is this?"
"An I owe you." He explained "Look Rouge, maybe you haven't heard but were in a recession-"
"A recession! So I did all of this for nothing?"
"No, when I get some money you'll be the…fifth person I pay back."
"Fifth?" Rouge took deep breaths "Where is your sister? If you're not paying me she is."
"Right…about that. She's not really my sister."
"What?" she fought to stay calm "You didn't check to make sure she was your sister?"
"She sounded convincing." He shrugged.
"Uh! Now you owe me double you gullible dummy! Get out of my house!" she yelled.
Knuckles was about to respond but she pushed him out and slammed the door.
"Geez." Knuckles mumbled walking back to the car.
Okay! Finished. Just a funny story I wrote. I know the characters aren't in their…character, if you know what I mean. Sorry about that; too lazy to fix it. When you review…and you will…please do me a favor and tell me the funniest part to you. I wanna see your comments. Thanks for reading.
-NightRider94