A/N: First off, I have to say "sorry" to all the people who have been waiting patiently for a Peer to Peer and/or Kokoro no Hana update, but I just got this good idea that practically begged to be written. (Don't worry, I haven't forgotten about either of those stories!)
I'm experimenting with a lot of things in this story, including writing in the first person, writing for the couple NaruHina, and writing in chatroom style. For the time being, the odd chapters are written from Hinata's POV and the even chapters from Naruto's POV, although that could change later.
Also, just so you know, Naruto is going to be bisexual in this story (because I like my stories to be unique and different =), so there will probably be (nonexplicit) references to his prior relationship with Sasuke in future chapters.
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Chat 1
(Hinata)
I should have known it was a prank. She does this to me all the time, but, like an idiot, I always fall for it. I guess I'm too trusting for my own good.
My face was flushed, my heart fluttered, and my breath escaped in short, breathy pants as I stared at the blatant proposition scrawled across the screen in 12-point font, but I was not aroused.
I was upset and confused. I had never been addressed that way before, and I didn't know how to respond.
milkman: You are my dick puppet. I put on a little play.
01010101
I'd connected to the internet about half an hour ago to check my email. I had seventeen new messages. Most were virtual "thank you" notes and invitations to charity events from non-profit organizations I'd donated to in my professional capacity as Community Relations Director of Hyuuga Enterprises. A few were spam emails. I'd just checked the "delete" box next to an email advertisement for a miracle diet pill when a box popped up in my browser window that said:
partygrl69 has invited you to join Party Chat 1.
Underneath the message, there were two boxes to click that enabled me to either Accept or Reject the invitation. I thought it was weird that an unknown person was inviting me to join a random chat room, so I clicked Reject.
A second later, my cell phone rang.
I answered it on the second ring.
"Hello?"
"Hinataaaaaaa!" My little sister's voice blew up in my ear. "Why did you ignore my invite? I'm boooooored, and I want to talk to you!"
"I'm s-sorry, Hanabi," I stammered, flustered and repentant. "The invitation was from someone called 'party girl 69.' I didn't know who it was, so I declined."
"Fine, whatevs," Hanabi said, sounding annoyed. "Click 'accept' this time, okay?"
"Hanabi—" I began, but stopped once I realized the line was already dead.
She'd hung up before I could ask why we couldn't just talk over the phone.
I turned my attention back to the sleek, elegant screen of my new Macbook Pro, waiting for the message to pop up again.
partygrl69 has invited you to join Party Chat 1.
This time I clicked "Accept."
A new box popped up, prompting me to choose a screen name. I thought for a bit and then typed hinatahime. hinatahime at hyuugacorp dot net was my email address, so Hanabi was sure to know it was me.
I clicked "OK," and
hinatahime has entered Party Chat 1.
appeared in the chat log.
hinatahime: Hello.
The next message I saw was:
partygrl69 has left Party Chat 1.
I frowned. Why would Hanabi invite me to her stupid chat room if she was only going to leave without saying anything? I was about to leave as well when another message popped up on my screen.
ramenlvr has entered Party Chat 1.
ramenlvr: Hey baby ;-)
Since Hanabi had left already, I figured I might as well talk to ramenlvr. I had nothing better to do. Maybe Hanabi would laugh with her friends about how she'd tricked her gullible older sister into joining a chat group. It was the middle of the week, but that wouldn't stop Hanabi from sneaking out of her room and going barhopping with her fake ID.
hinatahime: Hello.
ramenlvr: shit, I gtg for a sec. brb.
milkman has entered Party Chat 1.
Apparently, even ramenlvr found me boring. Maybe milkman would want to talk to me.
milkman: Hi, I'm the new Milkman. Do you want it in the front or the back?
I stared at his message several times, but I couldn't make hide nor hair of it. It was like he wasn't even speaking Japanese.
hinatahime: What?
milkman: You are my dick puppet. I put on a little play.
My fingers trembled as I typed:
hinatahime: I have to go now.
milkman: Bitch.
ramenlvr: whats ur problem, milkman? leave her alone.
milkman: fuk off, u cocksucking piece of sht
ramenlvr: yea, that's real mature. *clicks report button.* bye, loser
I was hoping that would make the user called milkman go away, but no such luck. milkman continued to type obscene comments, but before I could close the window, another window popped up. It said:
ramenlvr has sent you a private message.
ramenlvr: that guy was a real creep. i hate trolls. wish i could ban him, but i don't have mod privileges.
hinatahime: Thank you.
ramenlvr: np =)
There was a companionable silence while I tried to think of something clever to say. But before long, I started to worry that the silence was stretching on too long and becoming awkward, so I typed:
hinatahime: How are you doing today?
Very clever, Hinata. ramenlvr replied:
ramenlvr: great! im always great when im talking to a hot girl. at least im hoping ur a girl. and hot. u could be a pedo or a bot for all i know, but I prefer 2 b optimistic =D.
I didn't know what to say, so I typed:
hinatahime: You were right. I am a girl.
ramenlvr: is hinata ur real name?
There were thousands of Hinatas in Japan, so I didn't see any harm in telling him the truth.
hinatahime: Yes.
But ramenlvr wanted to know even more about me.
ramenlvr: it's a really pretty name =). whats ur family name?
I wasn't stupid. I knew that there were internet stalkers who liked to masquerade as nice, normal people. Yet, if I was honest with myself, the true reason I didn't want to tell ramenlvr my surname had nothing to do with stalking.
I was the daughter of Hiashi Hyuuga, CEO and majority shareholder of the multibillion-dollar energy company Hyuuga Enterprises. Not only did I have the latest model computer, I had a wardrobe full of designer labels, and I traveled in a luxury limousine driven by my father's chauffeur, Matsuda. All my life, I'd had to ask myself if people only liked me for my money. More than anything I wanted to meet someone who liked me for me,and who better than someone who didn't know my full name or even what I looked like?
hinatahime: I can't tell you that. I don't know you that well.
ramenlvr: o haha sry. dont get all freaked out now, i promise im not a stalker xD. my name is Naruto btw.
Naruto? As in those little fishcake things? I wondered who in the world would name their son after an ingredient in ramen. If that even was his real name. He probably just picked something to go along with his screen name. I felt a little annoyed (after all, I had given him my real name), but I replied:
hinatahime: It's nice to meet you, Naruto.
ramenlvr: nice 2 meet u 2 hinata. y do u type like that?
hinatahime: Like what?
ramenlvr: w/ caps and stuff. like my grandmother. shit, r u 50 yrs old or something?
I wrinkled my nose. How rude.
hinatahime: It's not polite to ask a lady her age.
ramenlvr: sry, my bad. i'm 21, btw.
I thought for a second, and then typed:
hinatahime: So am I.
ramenlvr: awesome! What city do you live in?
hinatahime: Tokyo.
ramenlvr: me too! wow. maybe i have met u before and didn't know it.
I doubted it, unless he was the son of some rich CEO or worked for a nonprofit organization. In either case, he would have recognized me by my email address.
hinatahime: I don't think so. I've never heard of anyone named Naruto.
ramenlvr: have u heard of Jiraiya?
hinatahime: The famous erotic novelist, Jiraiya?
ramenlvr: yup =P. but he didn't start out writing porn. the first book he wrote was a children's book called Tales of a Gutsy Ninja, and the hero's name was Naruto. my parents were good friends of his, so they named me after the main character in his book.
I stared at the message on my screen. Either he was a very good liar, or his real name actually was Naruto.
Bsst bsst.
That was my cell phone again.
hinatahime: Be right back.
ramenlvr: ok.
I flipped it open and pressed the small green button.
"Hinata-san?" a calm, cool voice addressed me.
"Yes?"
"It's Hanako. I was wondering if you'd finished the seating arrangements for the Red Cross benefit. If you're too busy, I can take care of it for you."
"No, I can do it." To tell the truth, it'd completely slipped my mind. "I'll send it to you as soon as I'm done."
"Thank you. Have a nice night."
"You too."
I hung up on Hanako and pulled up the seating chart for the fancy restaurant we always rented for the banquet. I could keep it basically the same as last year, except the Nakamuras were going to be out of town, and the Iwas had divorced, so I could no longer put them at the same table.
I put "Iwa Sachiko" (now Takada Sachiko) at the Nakamura's table, along with her new husband and stepfamily, and I dragged "Iwa Makoto" to the Nara's table. I didn't think the Naras would mind sharing a table with Makoto, since he was Nara Shikaku's golf partner.
I left the rest of the people in the same seats they occupied last year, even though I knew Father wouldn't be happy that Hanabi was sitting next to Takashi again. Yasuda Takashi was the chairman's son, and he was a perfect match for Hanabi in every way- loud, crass, and arrogant. Father didn't approve of some of the things they did together (in public!), but I knew better than to stick Hanabi with another family again. The last time I'd tried that, she'd annoyed them so much they'd stopped attending the banquet altogether.
I emailed the pdf to Hanako when I was finished, then clicked the "Party Chat 1" window to find a new message from Naruto.
ramenlvr: hinata? r u still here?
hinatahime: Yes. I'm sorry about the wait.
ramenlvr: s'ok. wanna cyber?
hinatahime: What does that mean?
ramenlvr: it means "have cyber sex" =D.
That horrible pulse-pounding feeling came back. My heart twisted in my chest. I quickly typed:
hinatahime: I don't know how to do that.
hoping he would leave me alone.
ramenlvr: aww, ur a cyber virgin =P
hinatahime: You don't have to make fun of me.
ramenlvr: im not. sry. i think its cute =).
I blushed. No one had ever called me "cute" before.
hinatahime: Really? You think I'm cute?
ramenlvr: yeah. ur so cute, hinata-chan ^^. i pull u into my arms and kiss u gently on the lips.
hinatahime: I kiss back.
ramenlvr: see? ur good at this. ur lips are so soft.
I bit my lip and typed:
hinatahime: I don't know if I want to do this. I've never done anything like this before.
ramenlvr: u don't have 2 if u don't want 2… but it could be fun =D.
Oh, so he just wanted to have "fun" with me! He wanted to take advantage of a proper, trusting young woman who didn't know all the dirty slang men used to get women into bed with them.
hinatahime: I wasn't having "fun" before.
ramenlvr: that hurt =(. im nothing like that weirdo! i would nvr do anything 2 make u feel uncomfortable.
Looking back at the chat log, I realized I'd misinterpreted his meaning. He'd said "u don't have 2 if u don't want 2," which meant he was trying to be considerate. The "fun" he was talking about was the kind that would be fun for me too.
hinatahime: I'm sorry. I misread your message.
ramenlvr: np. so, how about it? i promise 2 take good care of u =P.
I was surprised to find that I was actually tempted by his offer. I'd gone on dates before with young men suggested by my father, but we'd never gone beyond a few awkward kisses. It felt strange to admit it to myself, but I was curious about sex. And what better place to experiment than in the safety of my own home, with an anonymous lover who probably lived miles away?
I took a deep breath and typed:
hinatahime: All right, I'll do it. I'll have cybersex with you.
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Edit: Milkman is NOT an actual Naruto character, just a random disgusting internet troll OC I made up to bother Hinata. I got his lines from a compendium of "creepy pickup lines"—if anyone used any of them on me, I'd run for my life.
Thanks for reading. Please review! Next chapter is from Naruto's POV.
