Nightmares

by cynical tsuki

It's just how Arima starts to remember his childhood and it starts once he begins to start a relationship with Yukino. Another poem note, I changed Arima into a girl in this poem because I feel that it'd have been easier for me to write as a girl.

Nightmares

It's a dream I can never wake up from

A neverending nightmare

Why did I start to remember

all those memories now?

Right when I began to climb the steps

up with him

I began remembering my childhood

I forgot I'd been adopted

My birth mother told me words

that I can't get out of my head

Harsh and cruel words,

words that tore my heart apart long ago

From my childhood,

there are only painful memories

And yet I can't get them out of my head

Why did I start remembering

all those memories right now?

Someone, please just free me

Let me be happy

Free me from all those memories

I can't seem to escape

It's in my heart, it's the other me,

It's in my shadow.

Oh why did I start remembering

all these painful memories now?

All those words that she said

I remember them

My cheek stings as I remember

slaps were often given to me

I had forgotten how much she'd always say

the words,

"I really wish you had never been born"

Echoing in my mind, louder and louder

each time it's repeated

Why can't I stop remembering?

Why did it just start?

Someone please, I'm trying my best

to reach up to someone

just to pull them back a little

to ask them to help me

Help me, free me from these memories

I'm falling even deeper in the bottomless

pit of my childhood memories

All the memories pull me down,

I'm afraid to sink further.

The nightmares keep coming

I'm scared to go to sleep

Scared to even live.

When will I wake up

From this nightmare?