A Yawning Experiment
Both Minerva McGonagall and Severus Snape, along with Pomona Sprout and Filius Flitwick was exhausted and wanted to take advantage of the fact it was the weekend and most of the students and staff usually too an extra hour for to sleep in but that infernally cheerful Headmaster who seemed to be one of those who had the ability to stay up till ridiculously late hours and still be perky and wide awake come morning expected all four Head Of House to be up- bright eyed and ready to tackle anything that came up throughout the day.
But as per usual they were up and ready- at least mostly ready by 6:30 A.M. To meet up with each other and head for the Great Hall. Poppy the Medi-witch sometimes met up and joined them when there where no patients in the hospital ward. This was one of those rare days.
"Albus and his brainstorming ideas are going to be the death of me." moaned Pomona. "Why couldn't he just give us all a break and save his ideas for the daytime?"
"We have to set an example for the children." squeaked Filius as he kept watch for the Poltergeist known as Peeves who had lately been habitually bombarding the sleepy staff and students with water balloons as they made their way to their breakfasts.
"They don't stay up all hours of the night-" Pomona said in a very tired voice, "The fifth through seventh years might if they are studying but they don't roam outside of the common room after curfew."
"Speak only for your Badgers Pomona. Curfew means nothing to certain students." snarled Severus meaningfully as they dodged a series of water balloons gleefully dropped by Peeves who had been waiting for them. A few hit their marks and wands were automatically drawn and drying spells applied.
"I'm getting much too old for this staying up until all hours." muttered Minerva McGonagall ignoring the veiled barb as she wished she could take a quick cat nap- just a little one, "If only that old Coot would listen to reason."
"Lately he has been suffering from insomnia." Poppy explained, "He won't use any potions to help him sleep either."
"And he has to make sure the rest of us suffer along with him?" squeaked Filius Flitwick who was wishing he could just slip into unconsciousness for a week or so.
"I don't think he realises that the rest of us are not in his league when it comes to staying up for long lengths of time." answered Poppy.
"Last night-for once- Albus fell asleep before midnight... two minutes before but..." Minerva then turned and looked sternly at the Potions Master as she remembered seeing Severus sneaking and replacing his wand into its sheath inside the sleeve of his robe "Severus did you cast a sleeping spell upon him last night?"
"Had to...needed sleep... wanted bed.." was Severus' only response as he walked carefully beside her with occasional scowls at the few students bravely walking by them who had happened to also rise early for their breakfast.
"All I can say it was effective." commented Pomona as she mentally counted the steps from the Hufflepuff entrance to the Great hall. ."I just wish I knew of a way to make Albus go to sleep at a reasonable time."
"Did you know that yawning is Contagious? As is Laughing and emotional tears... So I hear." Severus commented with a scowl, ignoring the incredulous looks cast his way.
"Yawning contagious? Really Severus, I can't see that." responded Minerva automatically. "You usually become even more sullen when every one is laughing and scowl terribly when faced with tears."
"It is and I can prove it by a simple experiment." snapped Severus. "Bad enough we have to monitor the dunderheads throughout the day but to stay alert for hours after curfew just because of Albus' insomnia..."
"How?" asked Filius. His eyes narrowed. "You aren't suggesting that we find a way to lower the amount of oxygen in the castle... That could do more damage in the long run,- not only to our brains but that of the students!"
"Of course not. The dunderheads need all the oxygen they can get to keep their minds working" Snape responded snappishly. "Anyway the theory that yawning is because of lack of oxygen was proven t be false by some studies done by muggle behavioural researchers ."
"Now Severus, There is no need to be so insulting. " Pomona started to protest.
"I understand what Severus is saying. It is simply a case of allowing ourselves to give in to the impulse of yawning while we are at breakfast." Poppy spoke up a little more loudly as she realised she needed to keep the discussion from escalating out of control. "It is a known fact that people yawn more in response to other yawns... One could say it is a kind of primal form of shared experiences that promotes social bonding and empathy."
"Oh come on, your joking.. May as well try out pranking the Weasley twins while your at it."
"No She isn't joking and definitely I am not." answered Snape grumpily as they then continued to walk or rather drag themselves down the corridor to the Great Hall. "If you want, just think of it as an experiment in unconventional pranking... On Albus."
"Normally I wouldn't agree to such subterfuge but- " Minerva sighed, "I think we're all too tired anyway to argue the point."
Poppy nodded, "I do understand what you mean Severus— I don't think it will do any harm anyway."
"And if it works ... we can celebrate with drinks at the Three broomsticks" Minerva smirked with a catlike expression.
The Teachers paused before the doors of the Great Hall and silently agreed to the course of action as they then proceeded to walk down the isles up to the Head table.
After sitting down at the Head table and their breakfasts appeared before them the professors were greeted by the Headmaster who had been waiting for them to appear.
"What a great morning it is. I do hope everyone is anxious to start the day with a smile." The vibrantly coloured robes swished as Dumbledore stood up and greeted the staff and the few students who had arrived early for their first meal of the day.
"Not If I transfigure you into something breakable." Muttered Minerva as he talked enthusiastically about the wonders of taking an early morning walk while viewing the sun rising over the horizon and up into the sky.
"I am beginning to dread late nights and sunrises. "Severus Snape growled softly as he eyed the table and then leaned forward to rest his head on his folded arms —hoping to have a quick power nap before the Headmaster realised he wasn't listening to him drone on. His eyes started to close even as he had to cover his mouth even as a yawn threatened to erupt.
Filius Flitwick was fighting to stay awake but yawned in response to seeing Snape doing the same and his eyes where slowly closing.
"Filius stay awake. If the rest of us have to so do you." Minerva scolded as she reached out and grabbed the small Charms Professor who was nodding off by the neckline of his robes and pulled back as he was inches away from doing a faceplant into his breakfast.
"I cannot keep going on two hours sleep a night!" Muttered Severus as he stared at his plate of scrambled eggs, hash browns and sausage that appeared and sat innocently before him.
"I don't think any of us can." Pomona said quietly as she glowered at the Headmaster with her eyelids barely opened.
"YAWN!"
"Y-A-W-N!"
"Stop That. "Yawn"
"YAWN!"
"Good Grief!"
"YAWN!"
"It is morning not time to sleep!" protested the Headmaster as he watched the tendency to yawn was travelling swiftly down the line of Professors. He himself fought to keep from Yawning but also found that the tendency to Yawn was overpowering.
"YAWN!"
Hagrid couldn't help himself and raised his large hand as his Cavernous mouth opened wide and Yawned.
"Yawn." Minerva felt the muscles of her mouth stretching as she once again covered her mouth.
"Oh dear, Why do I feel so...?" asked Filius Flitwick as he fought the tendency to yawn but lost.
"Good grief it is infectious" Pomona Sprout felt the yawn developing and covered her mouth.
"YAWN!"
" I was looking forward to finishing up the potions for you Poppy but ..." The Potions Master yawned once more and was followed yet again by his fellow colleagues.
"I wouldn't advise it Severus, I do have enough supplies..." YAWN, "to hold over for another week at least."
Headmaster Dumbledore stood up suddenly and said, "It appears that someone has cursed us with a sleeping charm." even as he also yawned involuntarily. "Filius?... Your the Charms Master- Have you (Yawn) any ideas of what curse has befallen us?"
"The curse of little sleep." muttered the tiny professor who looked blearily at the Headmaster.
"I have never heard of of that one Filius." responded Albus with alarm as he once again involuntarily yawned.
"Madame Pomfrey, I believe we best get everyone to the Hospital wing to be checked out " The Headmaster yawned as he noticed that Hagrid was snoring loudly – He was sleeping with his head lying sideways in his massive plate of sausage,scrambled eggs and bacon- the fork that was still griped tightly in his hand was tipped slightly as it held some scrambled eggs. "It seems to be an epidemic.' He yawned and felt the tendrils of sleep stroking his mind. "Must. Keep. Awake... Madame. Pomfrey..."
"You want my recommendations Headmaster?" Poppy asked innocently, "I believe you can break this yawning curse simply by, going outside and taking a brisk walk in the fresh air."
"I could I suppose but I have already taken my early morning walk about the grounds." Albus yawned as he covered his mouth and glanced up at the enchanted ceiling. Thinking a moment he reluctantly said, "I suppose another two hour jaunt might help with this.." He then had a fair crackerjack of a yawn which made him feel like he was going to split his face in two.
"Then I suggest two or three hours sleep now and then having a few more hours of sleep than what you have had lately during the night."
"Will a nap be sufficient to ward off this curse? " Albus' asked anxiously as his arm raised and swept toward all the professors who were yawning and looking as if they were going to fall asleep right into their breakfasts like Hagrid had. He yawned again and swiftly covered his mouth. His baby blue eyes where looking fearfully at the mediwitch.
"Yes I believe so." answered Poppy, "But I can't be too sure for another..." She looked –To Albus, as if she was studying the 'cursed victims' and pondering her choices. " forty-eight hours or so. You should go lie down yourself for a few hours. It will do you a world of good."
Albus yawned again and nodded his acceptance of her declaration. "All right." he agreed like a chastised small boy and with apologetic looks at his staff he left the Great Hall.
"Now I believe there is a round of drinks waiting for us in Hogsmeade." Minerva reminded her colleagues.
"Yes I agree, A brisk walk in the fresh air will help wake us up," agreed Pomona.
"Fine by me." answered Filius.
" I think I can spare a few hours to celebrate a successfully completed social experiment." said Poppy.
"All right- I may as well come too."
There was dead silence as everyone turned and stared at the Potions Master.
He shrugged, "Poppy did say that yawning is a form of social bonding." Severus' onyx eyes glittered, "Anyway we could expand our research while enjoying a drink or two at the Three Broomsticks."
"You are evil Snape... Pure unadulterated Evil." Minerva commented with a shake of her head and a cat-like smirk.
"Why thank you. It is so nice to have my talents acknowledged by my peers."
Autors notes
Okay so It is a bit silly but I just had to write it as I got the idea from the grandkids constant attempts to make me yawn..ZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzz...