Beforehand Explanation

This is not a big spoiler to those who are watching/reading the xxxholic series.

Watanuki is a high school boy with an easy temper who works part-time for Yuko; he can see as well as attract spirits.

Yuko is the owner of a wish shop that only humans with wishes and other mystical beings can enter.

As Mokona would say; "Mokona is a Mokona!" … He has black fur and a blue jewel in his forehead…. I'm afraid that is all we can say about this character. Those who do not know the series or Mokona, please just Google him! He is very hard to describe!!!

'Fallen Angel': for those who have not seen this episode, a fallen angel is a creature that feeds off of peoples will to be free, to say whatever they actually wanted to say, and act how they really want or be able to act. It destroys the victims self control. It is a spiritual parasite. Stuffs such as; " They aren't a person to do such a thing" and "It doesn't seem like them to do that" quotes you hear on the news all the time are mostly due to this creature. It's a pair of wings that grow as the person acts more and more like they would without any self control.

And as we go on please keep in mind:

"There is no such thing as coincidence, there is only Hitsuzen (Inevitability)." ~Yuko Ichihara

Change of Heart

You are such a fake! You smile at everything they say and act all cute! I don't see how I can live with you! You don't know how to handle the negative aspects of life. You have to seem all perfect. You act as though you've got a halo over your head, like your some innocent child. You don't look like me; you never do what I think you're going to. You seem to only see the best in people, and whenever people talk about their worst you simply dismiss it. Why can't you speak? Why can't you stop? Why can't you just be honest?

Why must I see you every time I look in a mirror…you're not me, you aren't and never will be… Why do you, a mask of sorts, control me? Who… am I?

"Yuko! Where are we even going!?" Kimihiro Watanuki shouted while dragging behind him a long and heavy leather rectangle.

"Don't let it drag Watanuki, I already told you that it's very expensive!" Yuko responded, completely ignoring her seemingly, always-ticked part-timer. "That case holds something I've been waiting a while to get my hands on!" Yuko exclaimed, happy as ever.

"Yeah, Watanuki! Don't let it drag!" Mokona said, popping out of Yuko's butterfly bag and landing on Watanuki's head.

"Hey! Get off there you stupid little fur ball!" Watanuki yelled. "But seriously Yuko, how much longer am I going to be carrying this for?"

"Oh, not for long; we're almost there." She mentioned in a darker tone.

"Almost there? But how can you tell? I can't see the end of this weird tunnel…. Yipes!"

A bursting light at the exit and they stood in the middle of a very wet and rainy town. The streets large, and water running down the hill, collecting in the middle of the road.

"How far have we gone? It was sunny just a minute ago!" Watanuki covered his head with the leather case.

"Just far enough, c'mon!" Yuko responded, pulling out a very fancy black and green lace umbrella. Walking down a few wide, dreary streets, Yuko stopped at a gate covered in ivy and surrounded by ferns. She pushed the black doorbell on a stone wall.

A bright-faced girl about thirteen years old opened the large front door and splashed out into the rain with rubber boots to greet them. As she got closer, Watanuki saw that she had bright green eyes and wavy brown hair. She looked at Yuko and asked, "Who are you?" in a surprisingly high-pitched voice, even for a little girl. Yuko merely stoops down a bit and says in a mysterious voice. "I am here to grant your wish."

"You can do that?" Her eyes shined with curiosity.

"With the proper compensation, I can grant almost any wish. I believe this is Cherry I am speaking to?"

The girl was shocked and whispered almost inaudibly, "I-I… how can you tell?"

"I am here to help."

"…C-come in please," She grabbed Yuko's hand and led her through the giant door and into a cream colored room. The couch, the walls, the carpet, even the shelves were all cream colored. Only a large vase holding long bamboo branches and a long coffee table were black.

"Are your parents home?" Yuko asked in a calm voice.

"N-no Dad's at work and Mom's at the store." she replied.

"Do you have any siblings? Any pets perhaps?"

"I used to have a caterpillar… but right before we moved here my Mom let it out of the cage. It was making a chrysalis but when I got home from school that last day Mom said she had to let it out when it became a butterfly –but it's not like it's a big deal anymore!"

"Are you sure?" Yuko had lidded eyes and a doubtful expression.

"Yes!" she responded quickly.

"What do you say Alice?" Yuko asked the girl slyly

"But wasn't Cherry her name?" asked the confused Watanuki.

"It's one of the most devastating memories of times before we moved here..." The girl who had been all sweet and nice was all of a sudden almost gothic looking. Her eyes looked darker, her bangs seemed longer, her expression creepy. Most surprising of all was that her voice seemed to drop a few octaves; it was so much deeper and depressed sounding than before.

"Yuko… does she have a split personality?" Watanuki was even more confused.

"Not quite, split personalities are quite different; the person has many more mental instabilities. This girl's spirit and mental state are way too balanced for a split personality, if that were the case. "Alice" is this girl's name for what she really wants to say. She separated what she in a sense 'should' say to, and about others and what she really wants to say." Yuko explained.

"Wait, so… does she have a fallen angel attached to her?!" Watanuki scouted backwards.

"No, this isn't as extreme as that. This girl has simply been acting with such superb self-control that it's been built into her lifestyle. Some of the things you say will make her automatically respond in a way that she no longer controls. In the end she hates that her self-control is no longer controlled. It's a bit like an actor or actress becoming one with a character they were portraying, but never got out of that characters personality.
Alice or Cherry aren't either of her real names, they're separations she has made of most of her words and actions. We all have some sort of this, a rude answer that just seemed to slip out, or an impulse that cannot be held back. Those are usually 'Alice' parts of us. However some 'Cherry' parts can end up like that too, she has those impulses all the time with 'Cherry' so her self-control has been damaged in a sense. Rather than one or two rude remarks, she is constantly lying and being nice, though that is not what she even intends to do."

"How can you grant a wish like this? You don't even know me, unless your some kind of stalker creep." The girl asked Yuko, very menacingly.

"If I say a wish can be granted, then it can. Watanuki, hand me the case!" Yuko demanded.

"Here." He placed it on the black table.

As Yuko opened it everyone stared. Inside was a single ribbon, and it seemed to be clear and shining, almost as if it was made of ice or glass. She held it out for the girl.

"This will help you to balance what you are trying to do with what you will and what your really thinking to. In a sense it will create a middle ground, a middle name for you, your original core name, Nami."

The girl, now hopeful looking, looked at the ribbon and reached for it. Then her hand pulled back as if from some other force.

"What do I have to pay you however? This is too good to be true, not possible even!" her eyes were dark again and she was furious. Watanuki was genuinely scared, how can a sweet little girl turn into this kind of monster?

"Your price was those names you gave to those sides of you. Never deal with a person with those names, or be called by those names ever again. If you are, the ribbon will shatter and it will be very dangerous if it does." Yuko responded calmly, tying it around the girl's neck.

"Shatter? But it seems like a normal ribbon… just clear…. And why just those names?" her voice was normal, in a tone between her other two voices. Her face lost the gothic look but wasn't overly bright either.

"A name has more meaning than you would think; a weight of sorts. Once you tell it to a person, they can use it, in ways good or bad. These names of yours only have about a quarter of the weight of your real one, so they are not too much to ask at this point, also you shouldn't be needing them." Yuko explained.

As she and Watanuki prepared to leave Yuko looked back. "Oh yes, and try to avoid looking in mirrors for a while, you might see one or two of those named sides in there."

Out in the rainy street again Watanuki asked Yuko "Hey, will that really help her? I mean she changed so suddenly…"

"For now that is her problem, she will overcome her fake control if she really wants to."

She looks back at the house and the girl standing outside, waving, with one of the ribbons ends turning dark purple, and the other bright pink, ever so slowly.