Much time had passed since Amy got back together with Kif after Bender broke off their engagement. Kif thought that acting like a "bad boy" would aid Amy in coping from her break up with the robot. Amy relished Kif's new attitude, so much, in fact, that when Kif attempted to be his old self, Amy strived to get his bad side back out of him. This had been occurring for so long that Kif began to feel as if he couldn't be himself around Amy like he used to. He knew that had to get advice from someone. The only person he felt he could talk to was Zapp Brannigan. As pathetic as he was, the captain had his own share of experiences with women, knowing first hand on how to deal with them.
Kif entered Zapp's room rather nervously, slowly approaching him. "Um, sir?"
"Ah Kif!" Zapp exclaimed as he sat up in his seat, setting aside his glass of champagne. "What brings you here, my slimy, green friend?"
"Well, sir, it's about Amy..."
"Ah yes, the little chick from Mars. How's the whole 'bad boy' thing goin' for you? After all, it was I who helped you win her back."
"A-And I appreciate that, sir, but now I don't think things are working out between us. It seems that all she wants is for me to be bad. When I try to be myself, she doesn't enjoy it as much as when I act tough. I don't know what to do, sir. I love her, but I can't keep pretending to be someone I'm not."
Zapp sat in his chair, rubbing his chin. "Well, Kiffy, my boy, I think there's only one solution to your little dilemma."
"What's that, sir?"
"I say you dump her like yesterday's garbage."
"B-But, sir, I love Amy."
"Yes, but she only loves your bad side. I'm sure you'll find another, Kiffy. Maybe she'll be green like you are, or maybe even purple! The possibilities are endless!"
"I do love her," Kif said to himself, completely tuning out his captain's chattering. "If she only wants a bad boy, then I must let her go so she can be with one."
Kif sighed as he slunk out of the room. He knew what he had to do, and frankly, he knew he wasn't going to enjoy it. As Kif sat on the edge his bed, he held his phone and slowly dialed Amy's number. After two rings, he heard a voice.
"Hello?"
The lieutenant's heart jumped. "Amy?"
"Kiffy? Oh Kif, I'm so happy you're calling me!"
"Y-Yes, um, Amy, there's something I need to tell you."
"What is it?"
"Well...I...um...I don't think this is working."
"Your phone? Then get it fixed, silly! Shpluh!"
Kif took in a deep breath. "I don't mean my phone, Amy. I mean our relationship."
"What? What do you mean it isn't working?"
"You only love me when I act like a bad boy. When I try to be myself you either ignore me or flirt with someone else. I'm tired of it, Amy! I can't pretend to be someone I'm not any longer! Our relationship is over! For good this time!" Kif hung up before Amy could say anything more.
Countless emotions began to overflow inside the alien. Kif was crestfallen over the fact that he had to cease his relationship with his smizmar. He was also indignant over Amy appreciating only his tough side, and not who he truly was. Kif also felt guilt-ridden for raising his voice at Amy, but he knew he had to admit what he was feeling, even if it meant yelling at her. With all these thoughts in mind, Kif grabbed a nearby pillow and sobbed into it.
Amy stood by the phone, dumbfounded over what just happened. Her boyfriend had just broken up with her, after being with him for so long. Amy shook and fell to her knees. With her face buried in her hands, Amy started to wail.
Hearing Amy's bawling, Leela stormed in the room. "Amy, what happened?!" She shouted as she kneeled beside her, resting a hand on her friend's back.
"K-Kif b-broke up w-with me!" Amy hiccuped, her cries growing louder.
"Oh Amy, I'm so sorry," Leela spoke softly, hugging Amy tightly from behind. "You know you have me to talk to. I'll help you get through this."
Amy sniffled. "T-Thanks."
Leela helped Amy onto her feet, leading her over to the couch. "There's gotta be something I can do to help you get this off your mind. Wait a minute! Fry and I are going on a date tomorrow night. You should come along with us."
"That's really nice, Leela, but I don't want to be a third wheel."
"You don't have to be. It can be a double date. We can get a friend to go with you. All four of us can have fun together, and I know it'll get your mind off Kif."
"But, who would wanna go with me?"
Bender casually walked into the room, smoking a cigar and whistling a catchy tune. The robot paused for a moment when he noticed Amy's face was reddened and stained with tears. With a shrug, Bender went on his merry way out the door.
"I think I found your date," Leela grinned.
"Leela, no. He dumped me, remember? I'm not going with him."
"Oh c'mon, Amy. It'll be a good way to get you back to being friends. I mean, you guys have been giving each other the cold shoulder a lot lately."
Amy sighed. "What if he says no?"
"That's what this is for," Leela said as she pulled a magnet out of her pocket, smirking. She got up from the couch and placed a hand on Amy's shoulder. "Just try and cheer up, ok? Tomorrow night will be fun. I promise."
"Fine, I'll take your word for it," Amy sighed once more.
With an approving nod, Leela left the room in search for Bender. She found him leaning against a wall in the hangar, still smoking his cigar. "Bender, we need to talk."
"'Bout what, one eyed meatbag?"
"Kif broke up with Amy."
Bender rolled his eyes. "Oh, how tragic. Must be the end of the world for poor ol' Amy, huh?"
"Oh, cut the crap, Bender! She needs all the support she can get!" Leela sighed. "Look, Fry and I were gonna go on a date tomorrow night, alone, but seeing Amy so heartbroken made me change my mind. I told her she can come with us, y'know, for a double date. So I was hoping you could…."
"Go with Amy as her date?"
"Bingo."
"Leela, of course I'll go with her," Bender said in a sincere tone, smiling.
"You will? Really?" Leela asked, her eye lit up.
"NO! Bahahahaha!"
Leela glared at Bender as he laughed hysterically. She shoved her hand in her pocket, revealing the magnet she showed to Amy earlier.
"Ah! God damn it!" Bender screamed as the magnet was placed on his head. "I've been working on the railroad, all the livelong day! I've been working on the railroad just to pass the time away! Can't you hear the whistle blowing? Rise up so early in the morn! Can't you hear the captain shouting? Dinah, blow your horn! Dinah, won't you blow...I hate you Leela! Dinah, won't you blow...take this thing off me! Dinah, won't you blow your horn? Dinah, won't you blow...fine! Dinah, won't you blow...I'll be her date!"
Leela cheered, then promptly removed the magnet from the robot's head.
"Fine, I'll be her stupid date, ok?! And don't do that no more! Stupid folk songs..." Bender grumbled.
"Excellent choice, Bender."
The next evening, the time had come for the double date. Leela didn't inform Fry about Amy and Bender joining them just yet, but was planning on telling him when they arrived at the restaurant they intended to dine at. Outside the restaurant, Fry was patiently waiting for Leela, glancing at a watch he wore on his wrist. He grinned as Leela approached him, taking her hands into his.
"Wow Leela, you look gorgeous!"
"Thanks Fry. You don't look bad yourself," Leela replied, her eye hooded.
The couple strolled inside and sat at their table. Leela glanced at the clock above the entrance to the restaurant. It was 8:00 P.M.
"Where are they?" Leela mumbled.
"What was that, Leela?"
"Fry, I'm sorry, but we're not going to be eating alone tonight," she sighed.
"What do you mean?"
"I'm not sure if you know, but Kif broke up with Amy yesterday. I told her she could come with us tonight, only because I wanted to do something that might cheer her up. Bender's going as her date."
"Wow, I didn't... Wait, Bender? Didn't they break up a few months ago?"
"Yes, but they both know they're only going as friends. I hope they get here soon. I told them to be here for eight."
Fry shrugged. "Maybe they're killing each other."
Meanwhile, at Robot Arms Apts., Bender was preparing for the double date. He placed a bow tie around his neck and sprayed some cologne on himself. The robot glanced at the clock on the wall. "Ah crap! It's already 8:05! I still have to pick up Amy. Why did I even agree to this? Why couldn't she go with some other meatbag? Nooooo, she just had to go with me! I could be snoozin' right now, or drinking beer!" With that, Bender tromped out of his apartment, grumbling to himself.
At Planet Express, Amy had just finished applying makeup. She sprayed on some perfume, a sweet aroma spreading throughout the room. Suddenly, a brick broke through the window, causing glass to shatter all over the place. Amy rushed to the window, spotting Bender below with his arms crossed, his left footcup tapping on the ground.
"Will you hurry up? Leela's probably throwing a hissy fit 'cause we're late."
"God, you didn't need to break the window, Bender! Why couldn't you have just come inside?!"
"That takes too much time and energy. Now, hurry up!"
Amy rolled her eyes and marched downstairs. "I knew going with him wasn't a great idea," she mumbled.
Bender's eyes widened as he watched Amy approach him. "Whoa Mama!"
"What?" Amy asked impatiently, crossing her arms.
"It's just...uh...y-your dress...uh...w-would look better on a sack of meat! Yeah! Take that, meatbag!"
"Ugh, I'm regretting this night already!" Amy shouted as she stomped ahead of him.
Bender and Amy started their trip to the restaurant. It was only a couple blocks away, so they knew they could get away with walking there. As they turned a corner, Amy tripped over a cranny on the pavement, but Bender was quick enough to catch her. As Amy fell into his arms, she gazed up at him, her eyes widened in surprise.
"You alright?"
"Um, yeah, heh, I'm fine."
"That's good. I mean...watch your step! You...you...klutz!"
Bender quickly walked away from Amy, causing her to fall onto her stomach. As she got back on her feet, Amy growled as she dusted off her dress, then followed Bender closely behind.
"There you are!" Leela exclaimed as Bender and Amy approached their table, rising from her seat. "I was starting to get worried."
"Nah, we're good," Bender replied.
"Some of us, anyway," Amy said, narrowing her eyes at him.
"Well, I guess we can order the food now," Fry said with a sheepish smile, sensing the tension between Bender and Amy.
The four friends sat down. When their waiter arrived, everyone ordered their meals. As they waited for their dinner, Fry tried to strike up a conversation. "Ain't this nice? All four of us here together, having a fun ol' time."
"Oh yeah, fun," Bender replied sarcastically, lighting up a cigar.
"Bender, put that out! You can't smoke in here!" Leela shouted.
"I don't see no sign."
"It's right over there, shpluh!" Amy said, pointing her to right.
"Oh, so you can read? Well, I guess that's one thing you're good at, meatbag."
"What the hell is your problem?!" Amy screamed, glaring at him. "You're treating me like crap, Bender, and I don't appreciate it!"
"Go cry to Kif, then. Oh wait! That's right! He dumped you!" Bender laughed.
Amy's lower lip quivered, her eyes quickly filling with tears.
"Don't make me kick that shiny metal ass of yours!" Leela exclaimed.
"What? It's not my fault she can't handle the truth," Bender commented, attempting to light his cigar once more.
"Guys, you're making a scene!" Fry whispered, glancing around nervously.
"I invited you two so we could have fun!" Leela shouted, slapping the cigar from Bender's hand. "Not to turn this into an insult fest!"
"That was miiiiine!" Bender whined.
"I-I need to be alone," Amy said as she rose from her feet, rushing to the bathroom.
"I'll take care of you later," Leela said as she too got up, following Amy.
As the girls left, Fry turned to his robot friend, biting his lip. "Are you ok?"
"Oh, I'm just dandy, Fry," Bender replied, picking up his cigar.
"Something's not right with you. You're ruder than you usually are. Just tell me, buddy. I'm all ears."
"It's nothing, Fry."
"Did something happen before you got here?"
"No!" Bender said, turning away from him.
"I know you, Bender. Something's eating at ya. Just spit it out."
Bender groaned. "Fine! I think I might be in love with Amy again, ok?!"
"W-What makes you say that?"
"I-I dunno! I can't stop thinking about her, Fry! Even with I'm with fembots, I'm always reminded of Amy!"
"Bender, you're gonna have to tell her."
"Hell no! I can't tell her I love her! I just can't!"
"What's holding you back?"
"I dumped her, remember?! She hates me because of it! I know it!"
"Well, she was pretty upset. She wouldn't stop crying for weeks."
"It don't matter now. I bet these stupid feelings will all go away, then I'll be back to scorin' me some fembot hotties."
"Bender, I thought that what I felt for Leela would go away after her rejecting me, uh, lots of times, but it didn't. I told her I loved her and now look at us. We're dating, and we're happy as can be."
"Do you really think I can just go up to Amy and tell her I love her?!" Bender shouted as he got up from his chair. "It may have been easy for you, but it's not easy for everyone else, Fry!"
"I-It was far from easy, Bender," Fry said nervously, holding his hands up in front of him. "You just gotta gather up the courage to tell her, that's all."
"Then what? Have her reject me and tell me she'll never take me back?!"
"T-Take it easy, Bender. I'm only trying to help."
Leela and Amy were just emerging from the bathroom when they heard Bender yelling. Both girls stood and watched as the scene played out.
"She'll never take me back, Fry! So what if I love her?! That don't mean she'll take me back! Amy is better off with another meatbag anyway!" Bender was about to speak when he noticed Leela and Amy gaping at him in shock. Before anyone could say a word, the robot raced out of the building.
Fry screamed, "Bender! Come back!"
"Bender!" Amy shouted, bolting after him.
The alcoholic robot ran as fast as he could. He couldn't believe Amy heard him admit his feelings for her to Fry. You can say that he was beyond embarrassed. Bender was unsure of what he could do. Running seemed to be his only solution at the moment. As he rushed into an alley, Bender skidded to a stop. He was at a dead end.
"Bender?"
Bender turned to see Amy standing before him. With a groan, he faced away from her, crossing his arms.
"Please look at me, Bender." Her plea was ignored. "I heard what you said to Fry, and…."
"I know you did! Why do you think I ran out of there?!" Bender screamed.
"Don't yell at me! Please, just listen! I wanted to tell you that..."
"What?! That you won't take me back?! That you'd rather be with another meatbag?! That you hate my guts all because I was too scared to marry you?!"
Amy gasped. "Y-You were too scared to marry me? Is that why you left me?"
"Great, my reputation is just going down the drain tonight, ain't it?! Of course I was! I'm not exactly keen over commitment!"
"Bender, you have no idea how upset I was when you dumped me. Really upset, actually. Even though I ended up with Kif afterwards, I still missed you like hell. Something about you just makes you different from anyone else I've ever dated."
"Uh, maybe 'cause I'm a robot! You're a real smart one, aren't you?"
"Besides that! Look, I don't know what it is, but whatever it is...I love you for it."
Bender's glare softened. "You still love me after how much of a jackass I've been?"
"Probably more so than I did before."
"Amy..."
"Shhh," Amy whispered as she placed a finger over his mouth box. "I know. You don't need to tell me."
Before Bender could utter another word, Amy pressed her lips against his mouth box. Bender was shocked at first, but it didn't take long for him to give in. He wrapped his metal arms around Amy's waist, one of his hands tangled in her blackened hair, and held her close to him. God, he missed this. As the two parted shortly after, Bender smirked and whispered, "Wanna have some fun?"
Amy, fully understanding what the robot had in mind, grinned and grabbed his hand. The two practically skipped out of the alley, hand in hand, and were on their way to Robot Arms Apts. to participate in their own passionate kind of "fun".
Later that night, Fry returned to his apartment. After Bender and Amy left, he and Leela ate in silence. Their date turned from being pleasant to somber in a heartbeat. The red head never witnessed his friend feel so embarrassed. He hoped that Bender was home instead of out drinking so he could talk with him. Fry approached Bender's room and knocked lightly on the door.
"Bender? Buddy? You in there?"
After waiting a moment, Fry slowly cracked open the door. Two figures were seen lying on Bender's bed beneath a blanket. The figures, of course, were Bender and Amy. Amy was lying on top of Bender's chest with her eyes closed, a smile across her face. Her clothes were scattered across the room, so Fry had a good notion as to what they were doing before he arrived back. Bender had his right arm enveloped around Amy, his other resting behind his head. His eyes were shut and he was snoring softly.
Fry smiled to himself. He gently closed the door, leaving the couple to sleep at ease until tomorrow, when he planned to tease the living hell out of them.