Veggie Burger

Authors Note: I do not own Hetalia. So I recently became religious and that lead towards me changing my life even more. I became a vegetarian for my health and for animal rights so I got to thinking, "What would America be like if he became one" so I decided to write this. God Bless and enjoy. P.S. This is not to offend anyone who is not a vegetarian, this is simply for entertainment.

Alfred bit into the greasy cheese burger, causing ketchup and mustard to drip down his face and onto the conference table. As Canada gave his speech on the obesity problem among the youth of the world, everyone couldn't help but stare at the American as he ate sloppily through his brothers speech.

"America... what you eat is your business but please try to eat it less... messy?" France suggested to the American from across the table.

America looked at the Frenchmen, curiosity gracing his features. "Hm? Is it bothering you France?"

"Oui mon ami, very much so. Must you eat so... disgustingly?"

America smiled. "It bothers you?"

"Oui, I believe I just said that."

"Then I must."

France scoffed as the American began chewing with his mouth open after the sassy come back he'd just given him. From next to the American, England couldn't help but laugh at the expression on France's face when America said 'Then I must' however there was a small problem gnawing at the pit of his stomach. America's eating habits. It wasn't just his impolite way of eating that bothered him like France, it was what he ate. That cheese burger was the American's breakfast from the looks of it, and he couldn't help but worry.

"Perhaps you should pay attention to Canada's speech America?" England suggested earning himself a look of confusion from America's baby blue eyes.

"Why? I eat burgers, they have vegetables in them! Look, there's lettuce and tomatoes" he said showing the burger to his former mentor.

The Brit looked away from the sandwich in disgust. "Y-yes it does have lettuce and tomatoes lad, but it also has greasy red meat in-"

"This meat isn't red, it's cooked all the way until it's brown! If I wanted red meat I'd order a steak rare Arthur!"

"Red meat is what they use in hamburgers you twit!"

America cocked his head. "But it's brown..."

"It doesn't matter, that's just what it's called." the Brit explained massaging his temples.

"Well whatever, red meat, brown meat, red fish, blue fish, it still tastes really good and meat has protein!"

"So do vegetables America..."

"No, veggies have that stuff that makes you poop."

The room fell silent until it broken by a very awkward Canada, "Um, I think it's time to show you what they do in the slaughter house's eh?"

"Slaughter houses? No, meat is made by animals, slaughter houses are in that movie "The Silence Of the Lambs", those aren't real Mattie!" America explained feeling smart.

Another awkward silence fell over the room, this time everyone staring at England wondering where the Brit went wrong. Feeling everyone's eyes on him the Brit tensed up. "What the bloody hell are all of you staring at? I raised America back in the days where if you wanted meat you went outside and shot it or killed it with a bloody rock! Everything after 1776 is his own fault!"

Canada sighed as he took out his laptop and typed in Google. "If anyone is faint of heart you shouldn't watch this."

After Italy tried to escape from the conference room only to be held down by Germany, Canada started the shocking video of what happens in slaughter houses. Some nations had cringed and looked away, others left the room. However Germany and China seemed unaffected by this much to the other nations horror.

England turned away early in the video, only to look at America's expression when he saw the animals butchered. Once America began to gag and flinch, he knew that the boy had seen enough. "Turn it off Canada, I think he gets the point..." After Canada had shut off the program, England stared at America, trying to analyze the green faced American's reaction. "America... Do not throw up-"

The Brits words were cut off by the American vomiting all over the Brits blue button up shirt after he looked at his burger once more. Ketchup, mustard, and chewed meat coated the Brits shirt and the American's chin as the two nations shook, both for different reasons. The former colony was shaking from the horrors of the video and from the projectile vomit he'd just spewed all over England. The Brit however was shaking from being covered in vomit.

Defensively holding his hands in front of his body, the Brit looked at his former colony. "A-America... What exactly was going through your mind when you decided to vomited on me?" the Brit asked in a dangerously calm tone.

America was speechless. "I-I-I... the meat..."

"I'm not mad America... that was just... unpleasant." England patted America's shoulder. "That was the first time in about 200 years that you've vomited on me, and you're not exactly a baby anymore... that was... unexpected."

"England I love you man..." America whispered, clearly in shock.

England gritted his teeth. "You better after that git."

The room full of nations had just been staring at vomit covered countries, they were in shock from America's explosive reaction to reaction to the video Canada had shown them all. They assumed that America's reaction came from the fact that he had been eating meat right before seeing the video but they were only half right.

Germany cleared his throat and stood from his seat. "America, England... perhaps you two should go to your hotels rooms and... clean yourselves up... Meeting adjured for the day."

France snarled. "Secre bleu! What about moi?! The vomit got on me too! Stupid American!" he yelled showing the stained white sleeve of his suit.

"Oh belt up France, like it's the first time you've been vomited on!" England scolded in America's defense.

"England, my throat burns..." America said looking at the older nation for guidance. "What should I do?"

"Why the hell are you asking me?"

"Because I don't really think I can handle being conscious right now!"

England sighed. "All right, we'll get us both a nice change of clothes and- America stop, not here!"

America had been stripping his clothes off in front of the entire room. "Why not? I'm not walking out of this room like this!"

"Who cares, everyone you know already saw you blow chunks!" China interjected.

Ignoring China, England looked at his former colony. "America, I'm covered in more vomit than you are, my only saving grace is that I don't know anyone in this hotel and probably will never see them again."
The nation sighed. "Fine dude just get me out of here!"

England led the American out of the room by his upper arm and down the hallway. They men got a few strange looks and more looks of sympathy. America gazed at England apologetically when they got to England's hotel room. He really did feel bad about vomiting on his former mentor, but when America was gagging, the only thing he could think of was turning to England for comfort. It was second nature, instinct. "England I'm sorry..."

"America, it was an accident... perhaps that video was too graphic for you and you were eating in the middle of it. The important thing is that you learned your lesson and you'll cut down on the meat correct lad?"

"No... No dude I wont cut down..."

England nearly choked. "What?! You bloody twit! You-"

"I'm never eating meat again! From now on Alfred F. Jones is a vegetarian!"

Thanks for reading, chapter two coming soon.