Savannah:

Hi! My name is Savannah! I'm a college graduate who has a degree in rocket science. Nice to meet you!

Today is the first day of my new job. I'm a stage crew assistant, tasked with assisting a crew in setting up for shows.

I know what you're thinking. What happened to my degree? Why am I doing this low-end, dead-end job?

Lol, right? I can't find a job. My degree is so useless… I've been trying to find a job for ages, but to no avail. And my student loan debts are stacking up… so I really need a job… Fuck my life.

Oh, it seems like my boss Craig is calling me. What does he have to say?

"Savannah! Can you get me an extra microphone please?"

"Sure!" I smile and respond. I look around. We're standing on a large stage in a massive auditorium, with thousands of seats facing toward the stage. It's almost as big as a football field. On the stage are numerous speakers and wires. Craig is standing in front of a mountain of audio equipment.

"Great! Make sure to bring it back here. We need it for the show in an hour," Craig responds, and promptly turns back to the equipment in his hands.

I nod and take a deep breath.

One thing I should say off the bat: I'm incredibly nervous. I've never done anything like this before. So don't blame me if something goes wrong!

Actually… You know what? I can do this. I'm smart! I didn't get a degree in freaking rocket science for nothing! This should be simple enough. I just have to get an extra microphone. Easy-peasy!

I turn around and survey the area. Behind me, there are a bunch of props that will be used during the show. I look around through the pile seeing if there are any microphones, but don't spot any.

No microphones…

I look past the piles of props and spot several hallway openings backstage. Deciding that the microphones are probably kept somewhere past one of those hallways, I walk further backstage to observe them closer.

Suddenly, something catches my eye. Next to one of the hallways is a sign on the wall that states: "Storage closet."

Jackpot! They should have extra microphones back there. I'm so smart. Looks like that degree wasn't for naught!

I speed walk down that hallway, and inadvertently start skipping. I'm so relieved that I actually have a clue where I'm going.

Maybe this isn't so bad after all. I just have to follow the signs! A big goofy grin spreads out on my face, and I skip faster.

Alright, alright… I should be getting close. Where is this storage closet?

I travel further and further down this hallway, scanning back and forth. Slowly, I come to an intersection, and on the wall, I see a piece of paper with a big bold arrow on it. It points towards the hallway on the right.

"Hehehe," I giggle. "I found it! Microphone, here I come!" I turn right and start skipping down that hallway.

I've skipped for a good minute when I come to another intersection. And guess what - there's another arrow! This time pointing to the left! Hahaha, this is too easy!

I go through several hallways in this fashion, cackling to myself along the way.

However, as I turn right, then left, then right, then… wait what?

Where the heck am I? I start to lose the smile on my face. The storage closet shouldn't be this far away, should it…?

Finally, I reach a hallway where the arrows end. I scan the area in front of me and spot a little closet.

YES! Found it! You're a genius, Savannah! Hahahahahaha! You were a genius all along!

I practically sprint for that closet and nearly crash into it. I then slowly open it… And then share in shock.

It's not a closet. It's a freaking office. I had mistaken the door.

I'm an idiot...

Alright. No worries. Time to continue searching.

I exit the office and look all around. Many different rooms lining the walls look like they might contain equipment…

I enter a room, still hopeful, but honestly… I'm a little worried now. Where's the storage closet?

I look all through the room and find nothing. I then check another room. Then another. Then another. Then another!

At this point, I'm panicking. What am I gonna do? I can't even complete a simple task!

I can't fail at this… I absolutely can't fail! Not on my first day! Where is this microphone!?

I step out back into the hallway and look around.

Wait...

...Wait a second. Where am I?

All of the walls look identical.

...oh no.

I try to detect anything that looks familiar. I see nothing.

No… no way… Calm down Savannah.

This can't be… I was just… I should know where I am…!

I look around once more, and I don't recognize anything. What the heck!?

I search for over ten minutes, walking down random hallways, looking for arrows, the office door, ANYTHING!

Finally, out of breath, I stop in my tracks. I look around at the unfamiliar landscape and then just close my eyes in frustration.

I'm lost...

Suddenly, the full realization dawns on me.

No… oh no… nonononononononononono! NOOOOOOO!

I'm lost. I'M LOST! I'M ACTUALLY LOST! ON MY FIRST DAY! I'm a failure as a human being! I can't do anything right!

"AHHHHHH!"

Unable to control myself, I start to run around in a circle screaming while flailing my arms.

Whyyyyyy? Why am I so stupid!? Why did those arrows lead to nothing? I have a degree in rocket science and I'm doing this stupid stage crew job, and I can't even get that right! I even got lost! I'm a failure!

"WAHHHHHHHH!" After flailing around for about a minute, I fall into the ground, curl into a ball, and start sobbing uncontrollably.

Stupid job! Stupid non-hiring rocketry industry! Stupid me! I should have gotten a job at McDonald's instead… Actually, I would probably fail that too! I'm a failure at life!

"Um… Are you alright?" A gentle British accented voice chimes out from behind me.

"Uh-ah-?" Startled, I turn my mess of a face around. The figure of a tall yet cute man with brown hair wearing a t-shirt and skinny jeans appears in my line of vision. Seeing that it's another human being, I'm so relieved that I start sobbing uncontrollably once again, and start to ramble in between sobs.

"I-I uh... *sniff* I'm... *hic* I'm lost… P-please help me... *hic* I'm a failure... *sniff* I shouldn't... *hic* even be living…"

"Hey… come on, don't say that," the kind voice responds. He extends his hand and pats my head. "What's your name? Where did you come from?"

"...uh… I'm Savannah..." I start.

However, realizing what I look like, I turn silent. I slowly stop crying, and my face goes bright red.

Slowly, I start to gain clarity of the situation.

Oh no. OH NO. This British man just witnessed me breaking down on the floor! He probably thinks I'm a loser! OH MY GOD! JUST KILL ME NOW!

Before I know it, I'm sobbing uncontrollably again.

"Hey, hey…! What's wrong?" The man kneels down, puts his hand on my shoulder, and stares at me with a concerned expression. "Don't cry… Everything's alright. Nobody is here to hurt you."

"Y-yes… Yes…" I continue to sob.

Nothing's alright! I'm terrible at everything! I wish I could disappear! You know what? I'm quitting this job. I'm leaving! I'm done with this! I'm a failure anyway!

"I… I have to go…" I stammer. "Th-thank you…!"

"Huh?"

Before he can react, I've already scrambled up from the floor and am running as fast as I can in the opposite direction, tears blurring my vision.

I'm never returning again! This is terrible! Screw my life! I'm never gonna do anything like this again!

Everything is a blur, and I can't see where I'm going.

"AH!" Before I know it! I crash into something head first. And then everything goes black.

Dan:

Hi. My name is Dan Howell. Nice to meet you…

I'm currently experiencing a unique… situation.

It had started out as just another normal day of the GREAT AMERICAN TOUR me and Phil are running. Phil and I drove for a few hours to our show destination, and then got ready to do our show.

However, then something strange happened.

About an hour before the start of the show, I decided to get away for a little bit and relax my nerves. Stepping away from the practice room, I walked out into the hallway.

And then, just as I was relaxing… I heard some faint sobs. At first, I thought I was imagining things. Why would somebody be sobbing? But as the sounds continued, I became more and more sure that someone was sobbing their soul out. I'd never heard such high-pitched, soulful sobs before.

I immediately ran in the direction of the sobs, traversing several hallways before finally turning a final hallway and seeing the source of the crying.

A small, beautiful young woman was curled up into a ball on the floor, her innocent-looking face looking devastated and stained with tears. She had lush, long brown hair, big, brown angel-like eyes, and a small slender body.

Expecting the worst, I quickly ran up to the girl and tried to console her.

"Um… are you alright?"

The woman turned her head in surprise, and momentarily stopped crying. Then, a few seconds later, she promptly started sobbing again. "I-I uh... *sniff* I'm... *hic* I'm lost… P-please help me... *hic* ...I'm a failure... *sniff* I shouldn't... *hic* even be living…"

Seeing her cute face so devastated… I couldn't help but feel terrible and just want to hug this cute woman. However, I contained my feelings and continued to console her: "Hey… come on, don't say that. What's your name? Where did you come from?"

"...uh...I'm Savannah…"

She then suddenly stopped talking, and then bursted into tears again.

"Hey, hey…! What's wrong? Don't cry… Everything's alright. Nobody is here to hurt you."

"Y-yes… yes…"

She was silent for a moment, then suddenly said: "I… I have to go… Th-thank you…!" As she said that, she sprang up and ran haphazardly away.

"Huh?" I was momentarily bewildered, then watched as she ran straight into a wall, and then collapsed on the ground again.

And that's where I am right now. As you can see, it's a very unique situation.

"Oh my god! Are you okay?!" I hurriedly scramble to her limp body, and see that she has passed out.

"Geez… what the heck…" I can't help but scratch my head. That was really… strange.

"I should probably get her medical attention… Savannah, was it?" I bend down and pick up her body in a princess carry hold, and am shocked when I lift her easily. Her body is extremely small and light, even lighter than I had thought.

I look down at her face and can't help but blush. She truly is beautiful… and I'm carrying her in a princess hold… Anyone else who saw this would get the wrong impression. I'm not really one to ever hold someone in a princess hold…

Also, this might sound weird, but she smells really nice… kind of like flowers.

I start to walk down the hall and work my way back to the practice room. However, midway through, she suddenly squirms in my arms and mumbles: "...job… money… who cares… burgers… pizza… hungry…"

"Uh…" I look down at Savannah in bewilderment to find that she is still fast asleep, and had just been sleep talking. I let out a breath, and then keep walking.

However, just as I start to relax, she suddenly extends her arms and hugs them around my head, brings her petite mouth to my cheek, and mumbles: "...mashed potatoes…"

She then proceeds to slobber her tongue and lips all over my cheek.

"…!" I'm so taken aback that I almost drop Savannah on the floor.

"Hey! What are you…?!"

But Savannah merely continues to slobber all over my cheek, her eyes still closed, and her mouth opening and closing as if she was eating something.

Slowly, I calm down and begin to understand… This woman is dreaming that she is eating something! I can't help but feel strange… this unconscious woman is licking my cheek!

Not wanting to wake her up, I quicken my pace and bring her back to the practice room.

I walk into the room, where a couple people are sitting around, practicing routines, etc. The area has a white ceiling and walls, and a couple maintenance people are walking around as well. Phil is sitting directly across from me, and speaks up when he notices I have arrived.

"Hey Dan! We were looking for you…" As he is talking, Phil spots the woman in my arms who is licking my cheek, and furrows his brows. "Who… who is that?"

"I don't know… I heard someone crying in the hallways and went to check it out. When I got there, however, she ran into a wall and knocked herself out. She said her name is Savannah."

Phil laughs out loud before remarking: "And now she's licking your cheek? Are you sure it's not one of your rabid fans? Mr. Danisnotonfire?"

"Oh, shut up!" I bark back. I hate when people call me that… Even Phil. "She's not. She didn't even recognize me. I think she's dreaming about food or something..."

I move Savannah's head from my cheek and gently put her down on a nearby bench. "So… what do you want to do with her?"

"What do I want to do with her?!" Phil almost pounds his face down in laughter. "That sounds like we're planning to do something sexual to her or something."

"Phil…" I glower.

"Alright, alright!" Phil holds his hands up. He makes a straight face, and then sticks his hand into a bag by his side. "I should have an emergency medical kit in here…"

"There it is!" Phil take out a shiny white box with a red cross on it.

He opens it, rummages around, and then takes out a huge syringe. "Wow! Dan! Look at this! What a huge syringe."

"What are you doing?" I half laugh and half scold. "Get some ice and bandages!"

Before Phil can respond, Savannah suddenly stirs, and opens her eyes.