I don't own any Justice League fanfics getting sued and filed a 5,000 yard restraining order, blah blah blah
Restrained by a near Stroke
Chapter 1: That's It
"That… is… IT" Supergirl growled in anger, having been caught in a boobytrap by her longtime nemesis Deathstroke. For countless days the infamous assassin has hounded her days after days and, as usual, always ending in disaster. Even after Kara tossed him in the slammer, he always found a way to bust loose. Well, either way, Kara needed to be away from him, even if it meant putting an order of restraint on him.
Wait a second… order? Restrain? A-Ha! Kara had a permanent solution to her problem
"Deathstroke, as a member of the JLA and the United States Government, I am officially suing you for stalking, sexual assault, criminal negligence, assault and battery, drugging, constant pettiness, arrogance, bad cologne, old blood wounds, oh and impersonating Deadpool" Supergirl said, pinning a court order on the mercenary's head
"I'll see you in court" Kara said, blowing raspberries at her opponent as she flew off victorious. Before Deathstroke even had a plan of catching her, sirens rang out which probably means…
"alright Slade! your contract ride's over numbnuts!" Turpin barked, Deathstroke feeling the full brunt of the law as Sawyer bashed him into darkness by clobbering him on the head with her nightstick
…
This definitely wasn't one of his best days. First he'd been accused of so many outrageous accusations by a completely clueless and totally brainless 19-year-old alien Amazonian bombshell, then filed a restraining order saying that he cannot come within 5,000 yards of Kara or face life imprisonment should he ignore the order
"This is outrageous! I cant believe you sued my best mercenary!" Lex Luthor shouted angrily, as Kara sipped her chocolate shake
"keep yapping Baldy, I might sue YOU next" Kara warned, holding a list of compromising blackmail documents
"eep…" Lex squeaked as he knew Kara was the sole witness to Lex's womanizing habits with Circe, Dr. Light, Ursa and the other female criminals of the DC Universe. Kara also knew Mercy quit working for him because a) she's 100% gay and has zero interest in him because the way Jesse Eisenberg portrayed him was a total turn off for her. B) she enjoyed working for Talia since she's available because a curmudgeonly bat divorced her and got $3,000 in alimony and C) she hated how every object and painting was an exact model of his likeness
"so Lex… are you gonna back off and leave me be, or am I gonna have to give TMZ a call and let more than a few concerned Americans know just what kind of maniac they're letting run Metropolis?" Kara asked, her phone dialing the TMZ hotline
"Y'ello? TMZ? Yes, this is she. Ohhhh yes, I got all the files, all of 'em. Don't ask how, it came to me from a close friend of mine. Uh-huh, uh-huh. Oh yes, most definitely. Uh-huh. Mm-hmm. Okey-dokey then, we got a deal. Great, oh baby, the looks on everyone's faces, especially this putz I'm standing next to will be priceless! Yeah, alright, alright, alright. And buh-bye!" Kara said cheerfully, hanging up as Lex had fainted dead away, his skin now flushed white
"someone better call the ambulance… and while y'all are at it, get a defibrillator. I think this guy needs a reboot" Kara hollered
"you mean they're updating us again? Ohhhh god, why? Why, what's wrong with you people? Cant you ever take it out on some other guy?" Booster Gold whined
"Hey, Woody Allen wannabe! Do us all a favor and stuff them Booster Burritos into your big fat whiny piehole, will you? Oy gevalt" Two-Face yelled