My heart is beating fast. I know he can hear it. I can even hear it, and I'm human. When his hand intertwined with mine, a surge of heat goes through me, despite his hand being ice cold. My heart is speeding up more, which I didn't think was possible. I smile and squeeze his hand, I keep tapping my foot, I can't help being nervous. Edward said he had a gift for me, and while I usually don't like gifts Edward asked me to give this present a try.

It went something like, "Bella, I know you don't like presents, but will you give this gift a chance love?"

I had no reason not to obey since his topaz eyes seemed to implore me to be patient and grateful about a present, just this once. If it means that much to him then it already meant something to me, I decided to not put up a fight. Plus, who could deny a man who liked to call them love?

The conditions I did not agree to but followed anyway, was the outfit I was wearing. Alice naturally felt the need to dress me up like her own personal doll, and I was all but too unamused when I saw that make up was involved. Alice guilted me into it, saying it was her Christmas present to me and that I had to accept it but I didn't have to like it. I couldn't argue with her, after all human strength isn't something you should test against a vampire.

I run my hand over the silk fabric of my dress, it's the color of pine tree needles; trust Alice to be in the Christmas spirit of things. I think Jasper was the only thing holding her back from coming with me and Edward on this little adventure.

I am wearing black kitten heels with a closed toe, Alice begged me to wear stilettos but there is a line you cannot cross when it comes to me and heels. I'm like Bambi in high heels, and I can only imagine the atrocities that would befall on me if I wear six inch heels.

I can feel Edward's eyes on me again; I wonder if it is because of the dress's plunging neck line. If so, I would for once have to thank Alice for her sense of fashion. I won't know unfortunately, since Edward tied his scarf gently around my eyes. He said it was all part of the surprise; I was going to mention that the word kinky came to mind with the whole blindfold thing but I figured he would have taken the joke badly. Edward is a gentleman, but sometimes he gets antsy when I even say the word sex.

I don't mean to mention sex as much as I do around him, and I don't
mean to kiss him longer than I should, it just happens. I feel completely out of control when we are kissing, I understand the word hormones quite clearly now. I feel like they control my hands that twist into his hair, or my lips when the kiss his neck. He always pulls away first, and every time he does pull away I feel completely rejected. I understand that he does it as a precaution. I realize it is out of love, but I do not always want to just kiss Edward.

The car which was going fast as per usual has now stopped. "We're here." Edward says. I can tell that he is smiling at me. I smile too as my hand moves to untie the scarf, but he stops me. I frown. "Please don't frown Bella. I want it to be a surprise." I bite my lip reflexively; Edward removes his hand from mine and touches my bottom lip. I turn towards his face and lean in to kiss him. It's a chaste kiss, not nearly lasting as long as I want it to. He pulls away and says, "Come on, let's go Bella." Before I can open my door he opens it for me, and helps me out of the car.

Edward buttons the buttons on the coat I'm wearing; I smile smugly because I left them unbuttoned specifically for that reason. I put my gloves on and my head looks up to the night sky that I cannot see. It's snowing, but the wind isn't blowing so it isn't that cold. With only a few days left till Christmas I was hoping there would be snow.

Edward wraps his arm around my waist and kisses my forehead. I trudge along, contemplating what my gift could be. As we walk I keep guessing what my present is. I ask Edward if we can play twenty questions.

"No Bella, you'll just have to wait, it's not too far."

"Please! I swear I just want a hint."

Edward growls but I can tell it's all in fun. "Bella, just wait, you'll see soon enough."

"Is it a puppy?"

He laughs. "No, it's not a puppy."

"Is it a car?"

"No, you have the truck."

"What is it then?!?!?!"

Edward stops; he faces me towards him and lightly presses his lips against mine. I can taste his sweet breath, and I can feel his hand touching the side of my face. I press against him; my arms are around his neck twisting into his beautiful hair. He sighs and unexpectedly holds me tighter, pressing me up against him. My breathing hitches, and as I drag my tongue against the bottom of his lip I know I'm going to be in trouble with him later. Edward astonishes me by doing the same to me, and slips his tongue into my mouth. I hold my breath as he massages my tongue with his. One of my hands slowly slides out of his hair and moves down his neck, past his arm, past his ribs, and down to the waist band of his jeans. I pull on the belt straps of his jeans and attempt to bring Edward closer to me; it doesn't work in my favor. Edward pulls away quickly. I can tell he's angry, frustrated to say the least.

I stifle a laugh as I put both hands to my lips. "Sorry." I whisper.

"Bella, you will be the death of me I swear." He mutters under his breath.

I want to say something but I bite my tongue. I want to say that he's already dead, but I'm on thin ice as it is. I'm glad that he cannot read my mind, because all I can think about is that we are alone, and nothing is in our way of making love right here right now in the snow.

Edward takes my hand again and presses his lips to my glove.

I know that I have to control myself, at least for a little while. I know that Edward hasn't hunted in a week and I'm just making it harder on him.

"Alright, this is the spot." His hand unties the scarf which falls on my shoulders. I open my eyes in sheer curiosity, and smile like a complete loon as I recognize where we are. "The meadow…" I whisper. Edward moves behind me and encircles me in his arms.

"Yes, love. It's our favorite spot." He kisses the top of my head then my earlobe. I close my eyes, and rest my hands on his arms. "Do you want your present now?" I nod my head into his chest, my eyes are still closed.

Edward spins me around to face him, my eyes open immediately. He looks nervous, and I grow even more inquisitive as he places his hands in his pockets looking at the ground then at me. Is Edward Cullen blushing? Can vampires actually blush? I can't help but to giggle a little, Edward just smiles and licks his lips. I control myself to not move closer to him and kiss him again.

"Ever since the first day I saw you, I knew. I knew that there was something beyond just us. I knew that fate brought us here together, for whatever strange reason, and I knew that from then on that I would never forget you or want to hurt you." I smiled and grasped one of his hands and intertwined it with mine, he grasped my other hand so both of our hands were holding each other's. I looked down and tried to not blush, but I knew already it was a failed attempt. My eyes finally settled on his amber eyes, and this time neither of us looked away.

"I love you Bella Swan, and while I should tell you more often, I don't. I, never wanting to hurt you, but despite my efforts I did. I broke that promise, even though I knew that it was a promise that no person, human or not, could keep. I always think that you deserve something better, someone better."

I shake my head, I'm a little frustrated. "Please, just listen." He says and maintains eye contact with me.

"I left, and I left you doubting my love for you-as if I had never loved you at all." Tears start to form in my eyes, but I try to hold them back. "I never want you to ever doubt that ever again Bella; because there hasn't been a day that's gone by that I haven't loved you. Ever since that day in Biology, I have loved you. So has Mike Newton" I could tell it was an attempt to make me laugh a little, which I obliged, still holding back tears.

"When I thought you died Bella, I died again. I never thought I could feel more pain than the day Carlisle turned me into what I am now, but with your blood on my hands I felt the worst pain of all. I died again, body and soul, and all I wanted was to end my existence, so I could no longer know that you weren't in this world any longer." A tear escaped, without me wanting it to. One of Edward's hands left mine to wipe it away and caress my cheek, my hand moved to that arm as if willing it to stay. I knew there would be more tears if he kept talking this way. My bottom lip was quivering; I am trying to be strong.

"When I saw you again, I swore that heaven was coming for me already, as if I was doing something right by ending my life. I could no longer live in a world where you didn't exist, and I didn't care if that meant forever living in the pits of Hell, because I knew that's what I deserved. When you decided to love me again, despite me pushing you towards Jacob, I was relieved and so grateful. I know what I'm about to do right now is selfish, but I have never been able to be a selfless man. Even when it comes to you sometimes, I feel like I'm still being selfish." Another tear falls onto Edward's fingers; his thumb rubs my cheek and then my lips. I am anticipating what he's going to say next, but I am still clueless as to what is going to happen.

"I love you Isabella Swan." I think to myself, oh he used my full name; this has got to be serious. His hands unclasp mine and move to his jean pockets. He bends down on one knee and pulls out a pink colored box, he opens it and inside there's a ring. A wedding ring. I gasp, my hands fly to my mouth and I stare at the box with complete and utter shock. I couldn't be more stunned.

"Isabella Swan, will you do me the honor of being my wife?"