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An Offer of Friendship
By: ChoCedric
Cho thought it was an insult to cedric's memory that classes resumed as normal only a few days after his brutal death. How could she possibly put any effort into schoolwork? She walked around in a haze, missing Cedric's loving presence next to her. She hated all the looks people gave her, the looks of pity and sorrow. It felt like her mind had closed in upon itself; it had gone into a state of numbness and shock. Every time she turned around, she thought she smelled Cedric's cologne or felt the soft touch of his hand upon her shoulder. But whenever her heart soared with relief, it only shattered again in despair when she realized she'd only imagined it.
Anger and bitterness filled her as the next few days passed. Her friends continued to be there for her and to be supportive, but she desperately wanted them to leave her alone. The only person she wanted to see was gone forever from her. It just wasn't fair.
The reason she felt so angry and bitter was that no teacher had bothered to approach her to tell her what Cedric had been through in his final moments. The more days that went by, the more she wondered whether there was anything she could have done for him. She saw Dumbledore's eyes land on her during meals, but it was plain that the man did not want to tell her what had occurred.
The night of the leaving feast, Cho didn't want to go. She was told by her mother that in the time of the First War, whenever there was a major casualty, black banners would decorate the Great Hall at Hogwarts. Cho didn't need this as a further reminder that the boy she loved was gone forever. The finality of it still shocked her to the core. She continued to see Cedric's lifeless gray eyes everywhere she went; the image refused to leave her head.
"Come on, Cho, it'll be all right," Marietta tried to soothe her. "I'll hold your hand the whole time if you want. It'll be no use staying here by yourself."
Cho, sick of arguing, nodded sullenly. Marietta kept an arm around her as the group of friends travelled to the Great Hall. Fury swarmed inside her as her so-called friends Amanda and Meghan giggled about something. Their lives were moving along as usual; nothing seemed to bother them. They were happy-go-lucky as always.
As soon as they arrived in the Great Hall, Cho looked around and immediately saw the black banners in memory of Cedric. Waves of emotion hit her full-on, and she saw the Hufflepuffs, stricken without their leader. It was a horrible thing to witness. The hall, usually filled with the hustle and bustle of eating and talking, was totally subdued and silent. Cho glumly sat down at her table and began picking at her food.
"Cheer up, Cho," Meghan said from Cho's right side. "Cedric wouldn't want to see you like this."
Well, Cedric isn't here to reprimand me, Cho wanted to shoot back viciously. What did Meghan know, anyway? She'd even told Cho many times while she and Cedric were dating that it wouldn't last; the most popular boy in school wouldn't hang out with a logical nerd like her for long, she'd said teasingly. She'd told her not to get too attached to him, for boys like Cedric would probably break billions of hearts. Meghan had laughed and said, "Just know that when he calls it quits, there're plenty of other fish in the sea."
But Cho and Cedric's relationship hadn't just been a fling, and over the course of their courtship, Cho had grown to resent Amanda and Meghan a little. But she continued to hang out with them, for they'd been friends for years.
AT the end of the feast, Dumbledore stood up to speak. Cho's heart filled with dread; what was the Headmaster going to say? It was obvious he was going to mention Cedric and Harry. Speaking of the Boy-Who-Lived, Cho saw him sitting at the Gryffindor table with his faithful friends, Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger. There was a haunted, faraway look in Harry's eyes, and Cho saw him glance at her every now and then. She knew that he knew she had been Cedric's girlfriend. How was he feeling right now? she wondered. Part of her longed to lash out at him, to ask the questions she so desperately needed answered. But she was rooted to the spot, staring listlessly at the memorial banners for her deceased love.
"The end," Dumbledore said sadly, his eyes for once not twinkling, "of another year." His eyes lingered on the Hufflepuffs, Harry, and Cho for a moment as he surveyed the Great Hall. "There is much that I would like to say to you all tonight, but I must first acknowledge the loss of a very fine person, who should be sitting here," he gestured to the Hufflepuffs, "and enjoying our feast with us. I would like you all, please, to stand, and raise your glasses, to Cedric Diggory."
The treacherous tears began to fall again as Cho got to her feet. She almost collapsed, for her knees were shaking so badly, but Marietta and Meghan held her up. "Cedric Diggory," the entire hall murmured, and her boyfriend's empty eyes once again inhabited Cho's mind.
"Cedric was a person who exemplified many of the qualities that distinguish Hufflepuff house," Dumbledore continued somberly. "He was a good and loyal friend, a hard worker, he valued fair play. His death has affected us all, whether you knew him well or not. I think that you have the right, therefore, to know exactly how it came about."
Finally! thought Cho. Finally, I get to know what happened to him. Dumbledore was going to tell the whole school. But she felt, deep down, that she should've been the first to be told besides his parents. After all, she'd been in love with Cedric; he was a person she'd considered spending the rest of her life with. Hadn't she deserved to know how the light of life had been extinguished from his eyes?
"Cedric Diggory was murdered by Lord Voldemort," said Dumbledore.
Cho felt her heart drop into her stomach. So the rumors had merit, even Dumbledore believed what Harry said about You-Know-Who being back. Despair gripped at Cho as the tears continued to pour silently down her face. Voldemort. The monster under her bed, the name she'd always dreaded hearing, the hidden entity that caused death and destruction to everything, was back. She saw from the stony expression on Harry's face that he was trying to hide his own tears. But part of her still didn't want to believe it. But the sincerity in Harry's emerald eyes could not be denied.
Around the hall, though, she saw people shaking their heads. She knew that they were immediately saying no, it couldn't be true. Another surge of anger erupted in Cho. How could Voldemort do this to her life? How could a wizard that had been dead for thirteen years suddenly be back? The illogicality of it struck her like a ton of bricks. She'd heard, also from her mother, that Dumbledore said at the end of the First War that Voldemort was not completely dead. But Cho's family had rejoiced as though he was fully dead, but now, Cho wasn't sure what to think. But the look of Cedric's eyes staring blankly into nothingness made the assertion probable that he really was back. Nothing but a heartless murderer could take the look of life and love from those honest gray eyes.
Cho blocked out the rest of Dumbledore's speech, and her mind returned to a memory from a few months ago. She and Cedric had been discussing the recent articles in the Daily Prophet about Barty Crouch Senior's disappearance from the Ministry. They had been sitting on the grass on the Quidditch pitch, Cho leaning against the warm weight of his body.
FLASHBACK
"You know, with all this going on, and that Death Eater activity at the Quidditch World Cup last year, I have to wonder whether there'll be another war," Cho said softly.
"That's one of my concerns too," Cedric admitted. "And then that Bertha Jorkins woman vanished on top of it. She still hasn't been found."
"It's really weird," said Cho. "Professor Dumbledore did say at the end of the First War that You-Know-Who isn't really dead. What do you think?"
"Honestly, I don't know," replied Cedric. "But all that Dark Mark business at the cup really does make me wonder. The prospect of war scares you, doesn't it, love?" he said gently.
"Yeah," Cho whispered. "It makes me terrified."
"It probably won't happen, though," Cedric reassured her, squeezing her hand in comfort. "We're probably worrying over nothing. It's most likely just a bunch of isolated incidents."
"Yeah, You-Know-Who can't be coming back. No spell can reawaken the dead, Dumbledore's probably just paranoid," Cho said. "After all, he must have seen quite a few wars in his time. Remember, his chocolate frog card says he defeated Grindelwald in 1945."
"True, true," declared Cedric, pulling Cho in for an embrace and a tender kiss.
END FLASHBACK
They hadn't been worrying over nothing after all, and it was ironic that Cedric was the first casualty. Cho felt nausea grip her as Dumbledore's speech seemed to drone on and on.
Then, everyone was standing again, and Cho copied the action automatically. As she snapped back to the present, she heard everyone muttering Harry Potter's name in the same way they'd muttered Cedric's. Cho also did this on autopilot, sobs shaking her body as the name of the Boy-Who-Lived was choked out.
After Dumbledore stopped speaking, Cho made a quick getaway. Marietta wanted to follow her, but Amanda and Meghan told her to stay back. For once, the two girls were on the same wavelength of Cho, preferring to leave her alone in her time of misery.
She escaped to the Astronomy Tower, where she climbed up to the very top and sat down, burying her face in her hands. Oh, if only she could go back to the nights she and Cedric had spent here, snuggled up under the stars. Why, it had only been a week ago that the Hogwarts prom had taken place, and the Cedric lying in that hospital bed, motionless, had not been the Cedric that had so much energy and had danced with her all night, twirled and whirled her around, that went up to the dj and requested a slow love song for them to slow-dance to.
Cho spent many minutes sitting up there, wanting to feel him beside her. Then she got to thinking. Should she just jump down? It would be so easy, to just end it all and go and be with Cedric. She felt so apart from everyone now, even her parents. Cho had always been close with them, but ever since they'd started fighting all the time, she felt like they'd drifted away from each other. Meg and Jack were so focused on their own problems that it seemed like they'd forgotten her. It would be so easy to just go and be with the only person who understood her.
"You can't jump, Cho. There's a charm on the tower that stops people from doing just that."
Cho whipped her head around so fast that her neck cracked. Standing a few steps below her was none other than Luna Lovegood, a Ravenclaw who was two years below her. Oh, Merlin. She was the last person Cho wanted to see right about now. The comments she heard Marietta make about her ... she'd probably say some silly thing about some nonexistent creature, and Cho didn't want to hear it. "Go away, Luna," she whispered.
Luna came a few steps closer; now she was standing a few paces away. "Don't worry," she said quietly. "You'll see him again, you know."
"Oh yeah?" snapped Cho. "Had a talk with him, did you?"
Where most people might have been offended by Cho's rude behavior, Luna just smiled serenely. "No," she said, "but I strongly believe that at the time of death, we are reunited with the loved ones we have lost."
"Well, how long am I going to have to wait?" Cho spat. "A hundred years?"
"It will get easier with time," Luna said sincerely. "I know that these are just empty words at a time like this, Cho, and I know I'm probably the last person you want to see right now, but I couldn't very well let you try to jump off the Astronomy Tower. Plus, you need people to be there for you in a time like this."
"No, I want to be alone," Cho protested, but her resolve was starting to weaken. Luna seemed to be unruffled by her annoyance, and it was making Cho think about her actions. Maybe she really did need a friend right now, no matter how much a part of her mind denied that fact.
"I lost my mother, you know," Luna said after a few minutes of silence.
"I'm sorry," Cho said at once. "how did she die, if you don't mind me asking?"
"No, I don't mind," said Luna, smiling softly at the older girl. "She was one of the best spell inventors in history. But one day, when I was nine, one of her spells went wrong, and it killed her."
Part of Cho wanted to scream, "Your mother wasn't murdered!" but she didn't. Their situations were different, yes, but perhaps they could bond over the experience.
Luna seemed to read Cho's mind. "I think we can," she whispered. "And I am aware of what your friends think of me. I am glad you are at least a bit more open-minded, though."
"I'm sorry," said Cho, embarrassment tingeing her words. "I ... uh ..."
"Oh, it's quite all right," said Luna placidly. "Most people like to deny that things exist just because they don't see them. Some people don't even believe that there is a life after death; they just believe that you fade from existence and are never heard or seen again. But I do not believe that, oh no. My dad told me that he's sad about my mum, but he believes he'll see her again too. So don't worry, you'll see your Cedric again someday."
"You really think so?" said Cho, still sounding a little unsure.
"Positive," said Luna, smiling. "I know you might not believe my words, and I respect that fact. And I'll warn you now, it's not going to get easier for a while yet, but there is hope. You're a strong girl, Cho, I know that you can make it through this; I'll help you if you're willing to be friends. I'll owl you this summer if you want."
Cho thought about it for a moment. It would be good to have another real friend she could talk to, not someone who was superficial like Amanda and Meghan.
"No, I am far from like them," said Luna. "But I can understand why they're like that, they are just in their teenage stage, like you were before you met your Cedric. He was a very nice person, you know. I can see why you liked him so much."
"I loved him," Cho said, another wave of sadness sweeping over her.
"I know you did," said Luna gently. "And he loved you too. I know he wouldn't want you to be sad for him."
"I know," Cho sighed. "And I'm sorry about your mother."
"Thank you," said Luna gratefully. "Now, when I think of her, I remember the good times. One day, you'll be able to do that with Cedric."
"I hope so," Cho said with heartache. "I really hope so."
"You will," Luna promised.
xxx
That night, Cho returned to the common room, Luna by her side. She couldn't help feeling resentful when she heard people snickering at who she had come back with.
When she went up to her dormitory, she was immediately surrounded by her dormmates.
"What on Earth possessed you to talk to Loony Lovegood?" Meghan demanded as she perched, uninvited, on the edge of Cho's bed.
"Don't be mean," Cho defended. "She was actually really nice to me."
Amanda snorted. "What, trying to comfort you with her jibberish about Crumple-Horned Whatyamacallits?"
"No," answered Cho, annoyed. "She told me about her mother's death."
Amanda and Meghan went quiet, ashamed.
"Well, I'm glad you have someone to talk to," said Marietta quietly.
"She said I'd see Cedric again someday," Cho said, still feeling unsure about the truth in her words. But the look on the girl's face had been so full of belief and sincerity.
As Cho got ready for bed, she thought about the journey ahead of her. She was dreading tomorrow; what kind of welcome would her dad give her? Would he give her a speech about how love always ended in heartbreak and oh, I told you so, I told you it wouldn't work out? Cho bit her lip, contemplating. She knew her mum would defend her, but Jack's wrath was scary at times.
She thought she'd sit with Luna on the train, and she would ask Marietta if she wished to join them. She felt like having a quiet ride, not a ride that was full of games of Exploding Snap while Amanda and Meghan whispered and giggled about boys, mirrors, and hairstyles. She thought she'd take advantage of having a new friend.
Cho climbed into bed and pulled the covers up to her chin. Before she drifted off to sleep, a few tears fell on to her pillow. Cedric, wherever you are now, I miss you so much, she thought as she lifted her gaze heavenward. I hope you're happy, safe, and loved. Out of everyone in the world, you deserve it the most.
