Title: After
Rating: PG
Notes: Written all of five minutes after 'The Christmas Invasion', so obviously contains spoilers for that. Rose and the Doctor adjust an old routine.
Rose couldn't help but feel relieved when she finally managed to shut the TARDIS door on her mother and Mickey. She dropped her bag to the floor and leaned against the door for a long moment.
"Rose?"
The Doctor hovered nearby. He was still unsure of himself, and of her in relation to him. Things had changed so much, she knew.
"I'm alright," she said. "Just a bit tired. S'been a long couple of days."
A couple of days ago, she and the Doctor and Jack had been laughing together in the TARDIS. She didn't know where Jack was now, and the Doctor –
She turned to look at him, and couldn't help smiling slightly. The Doctor stood in his new clothes, in his new body, looking at her with the same vulnerable look as always.
"I do like the suit," she admitted. "You get it in the wardrobe room?"
"Yeah. You wouldn't believe the stuff I've got in there."
"I've seen it," she reminded him. She shoved her hands in her pockets, awkward suddenly. "I, um…I better put this stuff in my room."
"Right." The Doctor turned and fiddled with the console. "D'you want a hand?"
It was on the tip of her tongue to say no, but she said yes instead.
She sat on her bed, watching the Doctor prowl around her room as if he hadn't been there a thousand and one times before. As if he hadn't slept curled up in her bed with her most nights. As if –
He glanced at her, and she found herself caught. His eyes sparkled with mischief and adventure and she had to grin again.
"Alright?" he asked her, turning her teddy bear over in his hands. She nodded. "You sure?"
"Doctor," she said in exasperation. "How many times? Yes, I'm fine." He put the toy down and came to lie on the bed next to her. His shirt rode up, revealing a pale stomach. That much, Rose noted, hadn't changed. She was still attracted to him.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you," he said suddenly. "I didn't think it would happen so soon."
"Has it happened a lot?" Rose asked, startled.
"This is my tenth body." He put his hands behind his head. "I have to say, I do think this is an improvement."
"Yeah?"
"Well, I have more hair this time. And better teeth." He watched as she yawned. "Get some sleep, Rose," he said softly. "Big day tomorrow. Whole universe to explore."
Rose hesitated briefly, then shifted on the bed and lay so her cheek rested on his chest.
"I got really scared," she admitted. "I was totally useless out there."
"You weren't useless," he contradicted flatly. "You were confused and upset and you had the whole Time Vortex running through your head less than forty-eight hours before."
"I still don't get that. I mean, I remember what happened, but…"
"What, all of it?" He lifted his head slightly to look at her. She nodded, not looking at him. "Then…you remember what I had to do…"
"Don't say that," she said harshly. "Don't say it like it was some sort of a chore." She paused. "Unless it was."
"No, of course not." His vehement reply surprised them both. "Rose…you must know…"
"Know what?"
The Doctor privately thought that she was being rather unfair on him. "How I…feel about you," he managed.
There was a silence. Then:
"One of your hearts stopped," Rose said, seemingly out of nowhere. "Back at the flat, one of your hearts stopped, and I thought you were dying. And I couldn't stop crying. All I could think about was that you were leaving me again."
"I wouldn't."
"You were dying," Rose told him forcefully. "And I didn't know what to do. Because what would I do without you?" Her hand clutched at his waistcoat buttons. "Doctor…"
"I know, love." He shifted, and one of his hands moved to stroke her hair. "I'm here, though. Bit different, but it's still me."
"I know. I know that now." She closed her eyes and relaxed against him properly. "My Doctor," she murmured. "S'different though. I mean, you like my mum!"
"She's not so bad," the Doctor said softly. "Coped alright with me changing, and took care of me. Not that we'll be visiting often, or anything."
"No," Rose agreed fervently. "Could do without seeing Mum and Mickey for a while, to be honest."
"Yeah. Mickey." His fingers played idly with a lock of her hair. "Things alright with you and him?"
"I love him," Rose said after a moment. "But I'm not in love with him. I haven't been for a long time. Does that make me a bad person?"
"No, it just means you've grown as an individual."
"You're much less gloomy than you were before," Rose remarked. "It's going to be interesting."
"Yes, it is," the Doctor agreed. "Now go to sleep, love."
Rose loosened her grip on his clothes and pressed even closer to him. "Goodnight, Doctor."
"Goodnight, Rose."
Reviews are better for me than chocolate...