If I Wanted To:
"It might have escaped your notice but you're the one with everything to lose." He pants, his breath warm against the cool January air, releasing in puffs of smoke. "So I suggest you give that some thought before you start with the attitude... Because I can make life very difficult for you. If I wanted to."
He studies me, his eyes not moving from mine, reluctant to walk away but not tempted to stay. He gives me a menacing nod, before scraping his foot roughly against the pavement and walking off in the opposite direction.
I watch him go, my eyes soaking in every inch of his figure; so full of loathing now, yet so full of passion a few days previous. I feel his grip on my arm, the cold, sharp wrath of his fingers. Had it been a threat? Something to remember him by? Some sort of symbol that he could get thorough enjoyment out of this, control me in any way possible?
I had learnt not to play with fire, but being the ice queen, the heat always burnt through me in the end.
I feel the chill through the thin leather of my jacket, the silky material clinging to my skin as I turn and begin to pace towards the Bistro. My legs were shaking, fear disguised by the cold.
'I can make life very difficult for you. If I wanted to'.
I stop outside the double doors of my fiancé's restaurant, guilt consuming me. I had walked in here many times, a smile plastered on my face. I had walked out many times, often just... Well plastered. But now I couldn't face it, I couldn't face walking in and seeing Nick, when a few minutes previously I had been talking to the man I slept with behind his back. Raw, dirty, meaningless sex that I could never remove from my mind. I had traded in all I had for nothing. Betrayed the man who offered me everything, who made me feel like the world.
With a wave of courage I push the Bistro door open, immediately being met with the sound of lighthearted chatter and happiness. Nick turns instantly and gives me a sympathetic look. I didn't need sympathy, I needed hatred, which was something that Nick would never give me no matter what I did to him.
"You ok?" He asks and I nod bluntly, he moves round to my side of the bar to lightly stroke my hair. "How's Kate?"
"Shocked, confused, upset." I shrug, my voice weaker than I anticipated. "But she's sat eating ice cream and watching cartoons at ours so."
"Ours?" He raises his eyebrows.
"Mine, yours, whatever." I manage a small smile and he kisses me softly. "I'm sorry about earlier."
"What happened earlier?" He frowns.
"In the cafe and then when I came back from seeing... Rob." I sigh. "I keep pushing and I need to learn not to."
"Don't worry about it." He takes my hand, guiding his thumb over my flesh. "You've got a lot on your plate."
"I do love you, you know." I look down at the floor and he lifts my chin with his finger, kissing me again.
"I love you too." He laughs leaning his forehead against mine. "Always will."