I Can Get By Without Her Help

Benny's POV

'Live your life how you want and not how anyone else wants you to live', those were her famous words that made me wonder about her, made me think that maybe she was right. But now she is gone and I'd never had the chance to say what I needed to, the words 'I love you'. I know that she wouldn't want me to be sad but she meant the world to me, nothing less.

I was hopeless before I met her, getting drunk and arrested from a young age, I was really troubled. But she was like an angel coming down from Heaven to steer me onto the right path. My friends disagreed with what she had said and told me that I was kidding myself and that everything she said was crap.

No, she helped me and I could never have thanked her for that. I tried to find every way to thank her but she kept saying in her sweet voice 'No, I really don't you to make it up to me' or 'I live to help people, it is what my destiny, my life's mission, is'. I can't help but smile at the thought, the one I loved, and the person people call 'the One', was so selfless that everyone couldn't help but smile.

Her name was Erica, though she may be gone now she won't ever leave me, even in death she won't because I know I'll see her as an angel, helping people as she loved to do.

I first met her at school, running into her on purpose and making her knock her books onto the floor. She was smart and nice, not that I really cared and I didn't notice it but she was actually really beautiful underneath her glasses and slightly flawed skin. I was a real jerk back then, I would do anything to be the one that guys wanted to be and the one that girls wanted to be with, though I rarely gave anyone, but my friends, a glance in their direction. Except for when I would be mean to a person, and a lot of the time, that person would be Erica.

"You should consider yourself lucky; at least you get to look at me more than most people do." I'd say to her in a mocking tone.

"Why would I want to look at someone who thinks of nothing but themselves?" She said to me, picking up her books in her arms before running off to her one friend, Sarah. We would all laugh as she ran off, as if nothing mattered to us because, at the time, nothing did matter to us.

Nothing mattered to me till one morning during my first class, anyway. I'd had a message come to me to go to the Principal's office at that moment; the teacher even had to walk along with me to make sure I got to the office. From the corner of my eye I saw Erica sitting down at a table, probably getting ready to tutor someone, shaking her head at me. I scoffed and kept walking. When I walked in the door I saw Principal Hicks standing in the doorway to his office. He and I walked in and I took a seat. I'll be honest; he was a very intimidating person when he wanted to be.

"Do you know why you are here?" He said leaning over his desk towards me. Great, he had to start off with that question. I shook my head no. I lied, I knew why I was there, but I was afraid my voice would betray me.

"You are here because of your grades, your attitude and the means to even think of hurting people which you have done many times." I shrank into my seat, I didn't know where he was going with this and I had a feeling that I could do without knowing it. "Your attitude at school calls for you to be expelled but I think you could improve if you had a tutor."

"A what?" I said to her in amazement and shock. I would have rather been expelled than have a tutor to make me feel like an idiot.

"A tutor, someone who helps with schoolwork. Must I be anymore clear than that?" He said, I stayed silent and waited to hear who was going to tutor me and when. "Your tutoring beings immediately. Go find Erica; she is your new tutor." I walked out with my bag slumped over one of my shoulders. I walked along till I found her and sat with, though seemingly far away from, Erica. Oh great, I thought; now I'm getting tutored by the one I try to make miserable every day.

But the weird thing is that no matter how much I had tried to make her miserable she still smiled at me as I sat down. Erica pulled out a Math textbook and opened it to the start of the chapter we were halfway through in class at the moment.

"The Principal said that you were having trouble with Math the most, right?" I nodded but I didn't speak, I couldn't let Erica know why I kept failing Math. She began to go through everything from the start slowly so I could understand what the rules were and symbols meant, I found it easier to concentrate when someone was actually telling me what the symbols meant and how to apply the rules instead of being yelled at for messing with people during class.

The bell sounded for lunch, I hadn't even realised that our second class bell had gone. Erica packed up her books quickly and rushed off; she knew I couldn't be seen with her. My best friend, aka my teammate on the football team, Ethan came up to me.

"Where were you in Biology? It was the funniest lesson ever." He said as he sat with me and pulled out a piece of cake from his bag. I looked around to make sure no one was listening.

"I had a tutoring with, um, Erica." Ethan's eyes widened in shock but then he began to tap his finger in the table, he looked like he was getting impatient.

"You didn't tell her about, you know?" He said to me in a confidential voice. I shook my head no and he breathed a sigh of relief. Ethan was the only person I could trust with my secrets and he knew not to tell anyone.

"So, what was it like having to spend all of that time with Erica?" Ethan, unfortunately, also knew what made me tick but for some odd reason, his question didn't make me want to throw up at the thought of Erica or curse myself for having to be tutored by her.

"It actually wasn't too bad, I mean, I could concentrate better and I'm starting to get the hang of the problems we're doing in Math." Ethan just nodded and smiled, he knew I was nice and he never made fun of me when I said something nice about someone. Then Sarah walked up to us.

"Um, Benny, Ethan, you two wouldn't have to know where Erica is, do you." She looked at the both of us.

"You have two eyes of your own, why don't you go find her yourself?" I said to Sarah who shrank back a little from the table.

"I think that she would probably be near her locker, you should try there but if she isn't there then have a look at the tables, and she might already be waiting for you at a seat." Ethan said politely to Sarah. Whoa, what happened there? Usually Ethan would have insulted Sarah worse than I would have but instead he decided to help her. Where did that come from? Sarah walked away and I just stared, wide eyed, at Ethan.

"I was just helping her out." Ethan said defensibly before our other teammates, I wouldn't call them friends, exactly, walked over to us. Somehow they had found out about the whole tutoring thing.

"I think we might just go say a quick thank you to Erica for doing this for you, buddy." He looked at the other guys and they nodded to one another. They all left and Ethan just looked at me worriedly.

"Don't worry; they wouldn't do anything to hurt Erica." I said to Ethan trying to convince not only him but myself as well. "They-they wouldn't do anything to hurt her would they?"

"Why would they want to? I mean it's not like they're going to hurt her so you get bad grades and get kicked off the team, right?" Ethan's panicking chuckle turned into a sort of sob, he was so nice to people when he talked to me and vice versa. I stood up at the same time as Ethan and we began to run. We searched all through the school grounds but we found no sign of Erica or even Sarah.

Now we were worried. Ethan suggested we check outside of the school grounds. The both of us ran out the front gate and ran down the street to the nearest alley. Then we saw Sarah. She was bloody and bruised. Ethan ran over to her and picked her up in his arms. He carried her over to me. We lean her against a wall but Ethan didn't leave her side.

"What happened, Sarah?"

"Where's Erica? Where did they take her?"

"I-I don't k-know. They took her somewhere after they beat me up." She sighed and lay down in Ethan's lap. I stood up and ran further down the alley.

There I found Erica, lying motionless on the ground. I ran to her and held her in my arms, trying to wake her up but I found a stab wound in her back. I pulled out my phone and dialled 911 then carried Erica back to Ethan and Sarah. I put her down on the ground and we barely had to wait for the ambulance to come and get Sarah and Erica.

A.N. I'm uploading this for the first time in a long time. I did this story ages ago but only got two chapters in so I'm hoping I'll get more inspiration with this. Enjoy, comment and fave. Also, see me if you want me to try and write a story. I'm open to doing that.