(Update: Sorry, I was just fixing an error I found in here. It was really bothering me.)
He should know by now not to play with fire. No matter how careful he is or how much effort he puts into his presentations, he always gets burned in the end. It never fails. However, despite the odds, he tries. Again and again and again. He wants to – needs to – succeed. He can't bear to let things stay the way they are now. He's sick of being alone in a crowd of people. So, he reaches out, hoping for some kind soul to return the gesture, to notice him, but no one bothers to reach back.
He's practically invisible.
He makes attempts to stand out, but they don't go as planned. In fact, most of them backfire horrifically, which makes him more of a laughing stock than ever. It's almost impressive, he thinks, just how much of a mess he can make of things. At this point, it's virtually a talent. Before, he would try to laugh at the irony to make himself feel better. He would laugh now, too, if he didn't feel so hopeless. Any humor he ever found in the situation (meager and desperate as it was) is now long gone.
What frustrates him most is that those closest to him do not have the same problem. It's selfish, he admits, but true. While his entire family dances in flames, thrives in them even, he is the only one ever burned. He doesn't understand why. Watching them receive approval so readily hurts, enough to spark a fiercer, uglier, and much less pleasant blaze in his heart. But no one can know about it except him. He will not let anyone see this damaged side of him. To allow others to view his desolate soul would only spell disaster for his already tattered reputation. Ergo, he forbids anyone to peek through the falsely positive exterior.
It must be an excellent façade. No one, not even his own siblings, have seen through him thus far. Then again, these are also the very people who have witnessed his struggles, but not acknowledged them, nor done anything to assist him. He is always stuck watching from the ashes as they are embraced by the flames as naturally as they breathe. It's just so unfair.
But he loves his siblings. He really does. He could never hate them no matter how much they tease him or rub their popularity in his face. He knows they would never truly hurt him, not on purpose. There is only one thing in the entire universe that he honestly despises, and that is the burning sensation in his chest that he experiences whenever someone exceeds him in something, be it school or sports. Which happens often. He tries to suppress it, but it always returns, hot and all-encompassing and terrible. He abhors it, more than he ever thought possible.
But, deep down, he believes there might be some merit to it.
Truthfully, he's beginning to think that he will never truly be accepted. He is too awkward, too shy, too different. His peers aren't helping with the situation, calling him strange and a nerd (among other less savory things). But it wasn't like he was expecting help from anyone. Nope, not even a little bit.
One Saturday morning, he is sitting in his room with his brother next to him on the bed. His brother has a report card in his hands, and an open envelope lying on the floor (which doesn't bother his brother, but it does irritate him). The grades listed on the paper are pathetically low, as usual. They're practically zeroes.
"Just like your friends, Ravi!" Luke jokes. It's harsh, but he doesn't actually mean anything by it. He's just trying to make himself feel better since he knows he is going to be in trouble as soon as Jessie finds out about his report card. (Which Luke had smuggled from the mail earlier in order to delay punishment.) But still, Ravi weakly smiles back, ignoring how badly the comment stings.
Because it's true.
Wow, this could have turned out better. I was experimenting with a slightly different writing style and listening to angsty music at the same time, and this was the result. I guess I shouldn't do that again. Oh well, too late now. Anyway, if you actually like this, I would really appreciate it if you review! I'm so sorry that it's short, but it was mostly just an experiment to see if I could use symbolism and such. Whether or not I succeeded is debatable. (It probably doesn't help that I haven't written anything in forever.) Either way, thank you for reading! Bye!
P.S: In case my writing didn't make any sense, the fire in this was supposed to represent acceptance from peers. (Which it seems that Ravi has very little of in the show.) Would this count as a symbol or a metaphor? -_- *Goes to look it up*
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Jessie.
Oneshot word count (not including author's notes): A short 672 words!