So I just decided to create these weird short stories for no reason, mainly because I was bored. I suppose these short stories would be for people like me, who don't have a very long attention span.
Note: these stories are not serious at all. Most of them were written in the space of 5 minutes. Anyways, there pretty random, (and slightly offensive) so you've been warned…..
Billy Blue Bird was strange. Not the amazing or unique kind of strange, like a dog that can walk on its hind legs, Or a cat that can play the piano.
Billy was just strange.
Some birds say he was an airhead, full of helium and always floating about (Which was basically a way of calling him a balloon.)
Some say he was a murderer, always trying to kill two birds with one stone….. (pun intended!)
Anyways, Billy wasn't a very bright Blue Bird, Because one day he challenged Eddie The Eagle to a flying contest.
The rules were simple: whoever could fly the highest in the air would win.
So up Billy and Eddie soared into the sky, flying as high as they could go. But like I said before, Billy wasn't a very bright Blue Bird, because he flew so high he burst through the earths atmosphere, and into Space…..
RIP Billy Blue Bird.
The other Birds probably wont miss you.
ツ 웃 유 Σ ⊗ Ω ۞ ۩ ∞ ™ ®
"I WANT A KITTY!" the young boy yelled at his mother.
"O-ok sweetheart, but cant you wait until later -"
" I WANT A KITTY AND I WANT IT NOW!" He yelled.
The mother sighed, knowing sooner of later she would have to buy him a kitty.
So she took him to the pet shop, and there he chose a white fluffy kitty that strangely resembled a newborn lamb.
"So what are you going to call him?" She asked her son on the way home.
The boy looked at his mother, and smiled that angelic smile of his that could fool anyone.
"His name" he stated, "Is Adolf Hitler, and he shall be my personal Nazi".
Heil Hitler.
ツ 웃 유 Σ ⊗ Ω ۞ ۩ ∞ ™ ®
Mr. Fishay was walking home at night, when suddenly a robber jumped out of nowhere, pointing a gun at his head. "DON'T MOVE OR I'LL SHOOT!" He screamed at Mr. Fishay.
" What do you want with me?" He asked the robber.
The robber smiled for a moment, deciding what do to.
"I want you" He snapped " to put your hands in the air."
Mr. Fishay put his hands up in the air.
"Now wave them around like you just don't care!" the robber laughed
Mr. Fishay waved his hands around, trying to make it seem like he just didn't care.
"YOU CARED A LITTLE BIT!"
"NO I DIDN'T! I SWEAR!"
"LIES!"
The robber shot Mr Fishay, killing him instantly.
Then a bomb came and killed the robber,
too.
And that was the end of that.
ツ 웃 유 Σ ⊗ Ω ۞ ۩ ∞ ™ ®