1Disclaimer: Don't own... don't sue me.
Summary: Sirius comes to Lily for help. He has feelings for Remus and wants her help. She agrees but is secretly devastated. She is in love with Sirius but is willing to do anything to make him happy.
AN: This is dedicated to my friend who shall remain anonymous. The title is a song by Hellogoodbye.
Here In Your Arms
"Lily," Sirius whispered, gazing down at the auburn haired girl.
Lily looked up at the boy from her position on the armchair and smiled.
"What is it, Sirius?" she asked, placing her book in her lap.
"I need to talk to you," he said in a hushed voice.
"Why so secretive?" Lily asked, motioning to the empty common room. "No one is here."
"I just don't want this to get around. I can trust you, right?"
"You can trust me," Lily reassured the shaggy haired boy.
"Lily..."
"Yeah?"
"And I can talk to you, right?"
"Of course."
Sirius plopped down on the red cushioned sofa and threw his arm over his closed eyes.
"Well, you know that I like boys..."
"Yes."
"Well, I think..." Sirius started. He paused and put his hands behind his head, staring at the ceiling. His shirt lifted and exposed some of his toned stomach. A thin trail of dark hair ran from his belly button to the buckle on his jeans. Lily stared for a moment but quickly turned away, her heart beating fast.
"Sirius, you can tell me anything. You should know that."
"I think..." Sirius started again. "I think I like Remus."
"You... you do?" Lily asked, surprised. Sirius had always said that he liked boys but he'd only had relationships with girls. Lily knew of some random encounters with numerous boys from every house but nothing ever became of them.
"Dammit," Sirius swore. "He confuses me."
"What does he do?"
"Well, I asked him about it once. You know, joking... and he smiled coyly. Then he said that he'd consider experimenting. He laughed after that though. I didn't know if he was being serious or just messing around. I've been so bloody confused since."
"Truthfully, I could see him liking guys."
Sirius gazed at the ceiling and then suddenly rolled off of the couch. He fell onto the floor and mumbled into the carpet.
"What?" Lily questioned, tilting her head.
Sirius looked up and groaned.
"I just want him so badly. It's driving me bonkers."
"You know, I could talk to him if you'd like," Lily offered.
Sirius smiled hopefully and rushed over to Lily.
"Oh, do you think you could? I mean, don't mention me or anything. Just try to find something out."
"Sure Sirius," the redhead replied.
"You're such a good friend," Sirius exclaimed, pulling Lily into a tight hug. A sad smile spread over Lily's face as she hugged Sirius back. Her breath caught in her chest as his scent overwhelmed her. The smell was exclusively Sirius. She was suddenly aware of every place their bodies touched. It felt so good but she knew that it was completely innocent. He would never love her like she loved him. She loved him so much. That was why she had to help him. She wanted him to find love.
He pulled away and smiled happily.
"I better call it a night," he said, turning away. "And thanks Lily. You are really a good friend."
"Yeah," Lily whispered to herself as Sirius climbed the stairs to his dorm. "And that's all I'll ever be to you."