Authors Note: Alrighty now, this here is a short story based on Otto's chapter in 'You Have No Idea' The purpose of it was to give insight on his character in the chapter, why he hates the greasers and what they did to him. The majority of this is just flashback but I did the best I could to make it sound legit and interesting. Beware there is some angst and several scenes depicting attempted suicide in here, if you don't like then do yourself a favor and don't read! To everyone else please enjoy.
"I'm gonna right all the wrongs that have been done to me!"
Otto had proclaimed proudly that day; he recalled everything that had happened right up to the current moment. He remembered how he had made his way down the streets of the industrial park, a look of determination plastered on his face and a wooden baseball bat slung over his shoulder. Nothing had been carefully thought out; it had all been a spur of the moment thing. No one had done or said anything to tip him off either, it had just came to him recently, to exact his revenge and make everything that was wrong, right!
Who had wronged him one might ask? Well plenty of people! For starters there were those Greaser kids; Otto hated them with a white hot passion. The stuck up idiots! Always prancing around with their shiny, greasy ass hair and their stupid leather jackets!
Turning his head to look up at his window Otto waited for the orderlies to come and let him out of his padded room, it was almost visiting hour and he knew that Edgar would be returning today. He was slightly nervous about his leaders visit and he had good reason to be.
During Edgar's last visit he had made a proposal to both he and Clint who was also currently locked away in the asylum with him. Otto had been thrilled with the idea of revenge especially if that revenge was on a greaser and it was a plus being that the order came directly from Edgar.
Although Omar was Edgars best friend and right hand man, Edgar and Otto still had a special bond, a bond that stretched back to the days following Otto's decision to drop out of school. Those were days he remembered like they had all taken place yesterday…
He had been sitting alone behind an old abandon house after coming back home from the hospital earlier that morning, his mother had left for work and he found himself alone. He had attempted to go for a walk only wanting to ease his mind of all the recent trauma he had endured, only to have that attempt foiled by the appearance of a greaser.
Johnny Vincent
At the time the boy was still just a freshman, but being that he was a member of the greasers Otto had instantly turned on his heel bolting in the opposite direction, desperate to get away from him. Taking up refuge in his hiding place he sat there for hours on end too afraid to leave. The fear that coursed through him had started to drive him crazy and he found himself desperately wanting to get away from not just the pain he was feeling but from everything…
There was a broken bottle not too far from where he sat, he picked it up and without thinking was quick to slice his own wrist wide open. Blood came pouring out of the wound he had created and at first he hadn't cared, he had wanted all the blood to drain from his body, he had wanted to bleed out all of the pain that he felt. As he sat watching the life drain from his own body he had started to grow lightheaded and weak, when out of nowhere he had a change of heart about his decision. What would happen to him if he died, where would he go? What if when he died, things only got worse for him…
He had panicked and began to crawl out from behind the run down old house; he only made it a few yards before he collapsed, completely exhausted and unable to go any further. Tears streamed down his face as he made a futile attempt to call for help but he was too weak from all the blood loss to even speak.
That was when Edgar had appeared, Otto had only managed to catch a glimpse of the bi-racial boy before he slipped into unconsciousness, believing that he would never wake up.
To his surprise though he did wake up, in the hospital again as he had done several days prior to that, only this time he wasn't alone, this time there was somebody next to his bed watching over him.
Edgar…
Shaking the thought from his head Otto reclined back on his filthy bed and stared up at the ceiling. He was starting to grow bored of the same old routine there at the asylum, before he had been forced there he had been rather busy during the days leading up to his incarceration.
Revenge had been his motivation, revenge for all of the suffering he had endured, that was the reason behind all of his actions, behind all of the hell he tried to raise and all of the mischief he had caused.
He wasn't sorry for anything he had done; he had every right to do those things, and as far as those greasers went… Who cared if they got mad? He was owed what little satisfaction he had gotten from causing them trouble.
He had enjoyed every bit of it, the tags he had sprayed, and the car he had smashed, throwing eggs and hitting people with water balloons. Every bit of it was enjoyed… while he had been doing it.
The second his fun was over all of the negative emotions that were the driving force behind his behavior came rushing back to him. It had angered him, to realize that no matter what he did he may never truly be able to escape the pain of what happened to him, and there was nothing he could do to bring himself a sense of relief.
He told all of his friends about what he did, he bragged to them about how he single handedly sprayed all the tags around New Coventry bashing the greasers, and about how he had torn up the business owners car. He told them about the water balloons and about the eggs he had thrown at the Greasers. They all congratulated him on the havoc he had wreaked, and encouraged him to continue to cause the greasers trouble.
Not once did it ever cross his mind that his bragging about giving the greasers problems would backfire in his face…
It was late one night and he had been wandering around the entrance to the abandon slaughter house in the industrial park. It didn't bother him to be alone; he always hung out there by himself or with his friends if they decided to show up in that area. This particular night however he ended up wishing that at least one of them had been around.
He had just finished smoking a cigarette, tossing it to the ground and stepping on it, he turned to head home for the night only to stop dead in his tracks when he realized two Greasers were standing in front of him.
He stood there, paralyzed with fear as no words were exchanged for a few brief moments,
"You Otto?"
The one with auburn red hair and a light denim jacket asked in a rather crude manner before flicking a used cigarette at his feet. Otto felt the color drain from his face, he opened his mouth to say something but nothing came out.
"Well?"
The one with black hair and who also wore a denim jacket questioned him harshly when he said nothing. Otto took a step back as he looked back and forth at both greasers. Although he was petrified he didn't want it to show. Mustering up every ounce of strength he could he furrowed his brow and gave them an answer.
"What's it to you school boys?"
He had tried to sound confident and tough but knew he had failed in doing so. His smart remark had apparently served as confirmation to the two greasers the he was in fact who they were looking for.
"We got a bone to pick with you!"
The dark haired one responded after a moment.
"It's my understanding that you're the one behind all the tags around our part of town." He continued,
"We also hear that you were the one behind the incident with the eggs a few days ago!"
Otto felt like his heart was going to beat out of his chest, he thought back to how he had openly bragged to his friend about his involvement with what the greasers were currently interrogating him about. A wave of stupidity began to overtake him as he suddenly wished he had kept his mouth shut and let Jimmy take credit for everything being that he had asked the boy for help on a few occasions.
Not only that but this situation bared a striking resemblance to one he had found himself stuck in several years earlier. It too involved the greasers only it had been on the school campus and he hadn't done anything to entice their anger at that time. The situation left him badly beaten and broken; he ended up being hospitalized after being assaulted in one of the worst ways possible.
From that point on every night for him had been a hellish nightmare, one that every time he closed his eyes he was forced to relive over and over again in his dreams. That had ultimately been what prompted him to start causing the greasers any trouble at all, he wanted to get back at them for what had been done to him, he had wanted to right the wrong that had been done to him. Even if the current members of the greasers had nothing to do with what the previous ones had done he still wanted to make the clique in general pay for his pain and suffering.
Without thinking and refusing to play victim to another horrific event, Otto lunged at the auburn haired greaser. He knocked him to the ground and only managed to land one punch to his face before his comrade came to his rescue.
The dark haired greaser was quick to wrestle Otto off of his friend and pin his arms behind his back preventing him from going anywhere or defending himself.
Another unprecedented wave of fear overtook Otto as he realized that he was possibly in for more horrific abuse.
He watched panic stricken as the greaser he had knocked to the ground rose to his feet. A trickle of blood ran from his mouth down his chin, the boy wiped it away with the back of his hand before spitting out a wad of blood on the concrete.
Not waiting any longer he began to deliver a slew of painful blows to Otto's face, he struggled to get away but was unable to do so. He wanted to fight back to prove to himself that he was no longer the weak little kid he was so long ago and who had simply stood there and took the abuse he had been dealt, but he couldn't.
Each blow he received only seemed to serve as another painful reminder of what had happened to him and may very well happen to him again if he didn't do something quick. He blacked out for a split second only to come back too and realize that he was on the ground. For a short moment Otto thought that perhaps some of his friends had shown up to save him and that he would be able to fight back, but sadly that wasn't the case.
The greaser had simply released him so that he could get a few blows in as well. Otto curled up in the fetal position trying to protect himself. He felt like a coward as he laid there receiving kick after kick, he felt like the little kid that had been hurt, the kid that would grow up to be who he was today.
After quite some time the two greasers finally let up on their assault, Otto although bruised and battered was still very much conscious, but thanks to the beating he had just received his body had gone partially limp and he was barely able to keep his arms around his own head.
Getting up was pointless as he knew that if he did he would end up being beat right back down, but at the same time he also knew that if he did continue to lay there and not do anything then he may very well be in for something far worse than a beat down.
Opening his eyes he found that his sight was blurry, even though the two greasers were still standing over top of him he began to make a desperate attempt to get away from them.
The two of them were saying something, probably spewing more insults at him but he was so disoriented that he couldn't make out their words. He rolled over onto his stomach and began to try and crawl away. He couldn't allow himself to go through what he had gone through in the past.
Despite trying to get away, a part of him was still waiting for the greasers to stop him, he was waiting for them to once again restrain him and torture him in the awful manner that their predecessors had. Still trying to get away his body started to go numb with fear, making it even more difficult to move. Each time he moved he expected to be stopped, to be stomped on again and to be drug across the pavement. He knew, just knew that they were going to try and torture him again, but to his surprise and disbelief they didn't do that…
The last thing Otto heard from one of them were the hateful words,
"….Pathetic shit…"
Before the two of them turned to go, leaving him there to his own affairs.
He managed to make it home late that night, and decided that he would never leave his room again. After a few days several of his friends had stopped by to check on him being that he hadn't left his house for a while but he had refused to see them. His mother had tried her hardest to get him to come out of his room but he had refused to adhere to her request either.
He simply continued to sit there in his room and cry his head off like the world was ending and a part of him had wanted his own world to end. There was a razor blade he kept in his top drawer in case he needed it and at this time he felt like he truly did need it.
Holding one of his hands palm up, the same hand attached to the same wrist that bared the scar of his first suicide attempt, he roughly dug the blade into his skin and reopened the same wound. He watched through tearful eyes as the crimson liquid came spilling from his body as it had done in the past. He didn't care, he knew that there was a possibility that he could bleed to death but he didn't care, he didn't care about anything at the moment but the fact that he just wanted all of his pain to stop.
Out of nowhere he was startled by a rather loud knock at his door, he looked up through his blurry sight as he had now begun to grow light headed from all of his blood loss, he thought that it was going to be déjà vu all over again to an extent, and in a sense it was…
"Otto!"
He felt no type of emotion when he heard the familiar voice call his name; it was his clique leader, Edgar.
"Otto open the door!" Edgar called out to him; Otto could hear the worry in his voice as he was the only one in the clique to know that he had attempted suicide before.
Otto wanted to open his mouth and tell him and whoever else was at the door to go away but he found that he was too disoriented to even speak.
"Otto!" Edgar called out to him again, but as before the boy gave no response.
Suddenly and despite the fact that he was rapidly losing his sense of time and space, Otto heard a loud bang and his bedroom door flung open.
He looked up to find Edgar standing there as he had apparently kicked his door in. The mixed boy blanched at Otto as there was a tremendous amount of blood on his floor and his wrist was bleeding profusely.
The next few moments were a blur, he could barely recollect Edgar trying to approach him, he recalled the vague sounds of his mother crying hysterically in the background, and he almost couldn't remember the orderlies coming into his room to take him away.
Now there he sat, alone in his room at the asylum.
For a while everything had gone rather smoothly during his stay there, but after about a month things took a rather shocking turn. It had been in the middle of the day and he and many of the other inmates there had been out in the activity room. They had all been pulled from whatever they had been doing by the sound of a commotion making its way down the hall.
The two double doors leading in from the A wing flung open as a group of orderlies were struggling with an unruly new inmate, at first Otto had been amused by the scene but upon further inspection his amusement had turned to both fear and disbelief.
The new arrival wasn't just any old random person off of the street, it was a greaser, and not just any old greaser either! It was the clique's leader, Johnny Vincent!
Otto stared dumbfounded by what he was seeing; he rubbed his eyes to make sure that the medication that had been administered to him earlier that morning wasn't causing him to hallucinate. It wasn't, he was actually seeing Johnny Vincent being brought into the asylum!
He didn't sleep at all that night, he had been too afraid to even blink, it had angered him, the fact that he was stuck living with a greaser. To make matters even worse that greaser had been present when he had been tortured. He knew what had happened to him, he had been there to witness it!
Several days later Edgar had paid them a visit, Edgar knew that Johnny Vincent was there before they even told him. Evidently he had something to do with it. Otto and Clint had both listened carefully to Edgar's proposal on giving the leader of the greaser's pure hell!
Once Edgar had voiced his plan to the two of them Otto recalled that time seemed to stand still for a moment and for a second he didn't really believe what he had heard. The plan had stunned him, to the point where he wasn't even sure if he could pull it off. Clint however saw absolutely nothing wrong with it; he was the type who was all game for pretty much anything.
Just as Edgar had informed them that chances were Johnny wouldn't settle down he had done just that! He was constantly making his presence known, yelling and screaming about how he didn't belong there and that it wasn't crazy that he loved 'her'.
Their opportunity to attack finally presented itself, mere days after Edgar had suggested they even do it! The self-proclaimed greaser king had been shot up with a number of different psychiatric drugs and forced to endure, from the sound of it, a painful session of electric shock therapy.
Otto and Clint had watched from the rec room, the orderlies drag a barely conscious and nude Johnny Vincent back to his cell. They knew it would probably be several hours before he was able to even move at all so they had waited a while to get to his room.
The last few hours leading up to their assault on the greaser, Otto had found himself afraid and in a mental state of moderate disarray. He felt sick to his stomach, there was a part of him that felt like he had to go through with it but at the same time there was also a part of him that kept saying, 'don't do it!' As bad as he wanted to dabble in revenge and force the greaser to understand how he felt and the pain his friends had inflicted on him he still had to admit that this may have very well been over the top!
The time came, unexpectedly early though! They had been in the communal showers, Otto, Clint, and an already badly battered Johnny Vincent. They were the last three in there; the orderlies were too busy handling the mentally incompetent inmates to pay the three of them any mind.
Clint showered as if nothing were about to happen, but Otto had simply stood there seeming to be lost in a daze. Could he really bring himself to do this, could he live with the fact that he had caused someone the same type of pain that they had caused him?
Johnny was in bad shape, and just as Otto had he hadn't really done much showering that evening either. He was down on his knees with his forehead pressed up against the shower wall, that was the way he had been placed in the shower and that was the way he remained the entire time, he hadn't moved a single inch.
Otto and Clint had made a brief exchange of glances before Clint made his way over to Otto. Again his heart began to beat rapidly as he knew what Clint was approaching him for. Stopping mere inches away from him Clint casually leaned on his shoulder to whisper a message in his ear.
"We don't have to go all the way if you don't want to, we can just mess him up a little more than he already is!"
Otto blanched at his friend, he hadn't been expecting him to say that, he didn't expect him to suggest they do something other than what Edgar wanted them to do. His mind began to race with thoughts,
'Had Clint realized that he had been having second thoughts about going through with it? Even though he was aware of his personal grudge towards the greasers surely he didn't know about his history with them!'
Clint stared at him with a nonchalant expression on his face, he continued to lean on Otto's shoulder and at the moment neither of them were bothered by the fact that they were completely naked and so close.
Eventually it began to register somewhere in Otto's bedazzled mind that he needed to answer Clint. He blinked numerous times as he made an attempt to pull him mind together. He ended up merely shaking his head yes at Clint's suggestion partially relieved that he too was more interested in leaving out the most brutal part of their plan. Administering an ass whoopin was good enough!
Once an understanding had been established the two of them had wasted no time in jumping on the defenseless greaser. They didn't scream or taunt him like they normally would as to not draw attention to the showers, they both intended for the beating to go on as long as possible or until they got tired.
As always Otto felt a sense of relief each time he struck the greaser, he was enjoying every bit of it. Inflicting pain on someone who had caused him pain when they had no right to do so. Johnny simply laid there, he didn't even throw his arms up to try and defend himself which surprised Otto. He had at the very least expected the greaser to go on the defense but so far he hadn't, it was as if he didn't care about the fact that he was being beaten.
Several minutes into their vicious assault and an orderly had appeared at the door. Needless to say their escapade was over…
Sitting up on the edge of his bed Otto stood up at hearing an orderly open his cell door,
"Visitor." Was the man's only word,
Otto made his way to the rec room and found Edgar and Clint waiting on him. As he sat down at the table Edgar gave him a small smile.
"You two doin alright?" He questioned, checking to see if his friends were okay.
"Yeah we're fine," Otto informed him
"Good, so how'd it go?" He asked getting straight to business,
"We got caught." Clint blurted out rather nonchalantly, Otto said nothing.
"You got caught!?" Edgar exclaimed clearly surprised that things may not have gone according to plan.
"Yeah, but only after we took him down!" Clint added in, laughing a little.
Edgar seemed to relax a bit at hearing this; he leaned back in his chair while nodding his head just slightly, indicating that he understood. He glanced over at Otto,
"You alright?" He asked him in particular, sincerity in his voice. Otto's eyes widened a bit, he stared at his leader as the question, a simple one, hit him like a ton of bricks. He looked over at Clint to find that same nonchalant look on his face but somehow managing to see a different look in his eyes that said the same thing Edgar had just asked him.
"Are you okay…"
Feeling his emotions surge a slight bit, Otto did his best to maintain him composure; although it was a simple question it stirred up quite the storm in his mind. No he wasn't okay; he would never ever in his life ever again be okay. His ability to be what they called 'okay' had been stolen from him a long time ago, and despite his numerous attempts to get it back he was just now coming to the conclusion that he couldn't get it back. It was gone and there was nothing he could do about it. Bringing pain, destruction, suffering or anything else to those that had wronged him wasn't going to change anything. Sure it provided a momentary relief but that type of self-medicating was nothing short of being next to heavy drug use. It only helped while you were taking it, the minute you stopped and whatever that medication was supposed to fix always came right back, and to make matters even worse it was that sort of relapse that made one realize there was no cure for their illness. You would always be in pain, always suffer and you would always carry the burden of what happened to you on your own shoulders. Yeah you could learn to cope with it, but even then that too was just another form of self-medicating…
"Yeah…" He shook his head while struggling to hold back tears "…I'm okay…"
Author's Note: Poor Otto! Just for the record, don't take anything I said in here as being fact or anything, no matter what all you have gone through there is always the chance and hope for better days to come! Also in case anyone is wondering the two greasers mentioned in here Were Lucky and Lefty! Another thing, I will be writing a story for Johnny Vincent so you can see what all happened to him and why he was in such bad shape in the story! I will also be posting a story for Edgar as well! Thank you all for reading and I hope you all enjoyed, please feel free to tell me what you think!
-Akemat