Damn these two. Damn them so much. I'm not even comfortable shipping them! (any real relationship between them would be unhealthy as heck). And yet, they're so fascinating. This was inspired by a BEAUTIFUL Shizaya video on youtube, and it sort of parallels it. I can't do links, but here's the part that comes after the slash at the end of the domain name: watch?v=cDDU6iyBDkM
Enjoy!
The Heart Between Us
The first and last emotion Shizuo sees on his brother's face is fear.
They call each other's names, but they ring out over the destruction, unheard and unheeded by the frightened villagers and the ravaging soldiers. Horses rear in fright and snap their ropes, crushing everyone underneath their stampede and running away into the hills, past the villagers attempting to do the same. Shizuo pushes his way against the crowd, sweat and soot and blood rubbing off on his arms and tunic, trying to catch a glimpse of his brother's face before it becomes lost forever. The air is heavy with stuffy smoke and the clashes of swords and the heavy thump of footsteps and crumbling buildings, but Shizuo navigates through it all, following the huddle of enemy soldiers ferreting out the young women and pulling Kasuka away by one dislocated shoulder.
Kasuka has always been the prettier one. Now, Shizuo wouldn't mind the title if it meant they'd take him instead.
o0o
He fights like he's never fought before – his muscles stretch and pull apart, fibers breaking under the strain and bones crumbling under the pressure, but still he fights to get Kasuka back. He roars—the slim, skinny frame of a young boy attempting something inhuman, and almost— almost— succeeding.
0o0
He lies on the ground, bloody and bruised and unable to move, surrounded by a massacre that smells of greed and selfishness and bleeds human lives. Not all the casualties are theirs though— around him, smashed skulls and splintered debris bear the marks of his small hands.
But it wasn't enough. Kasuka is still gone, and now Shizuo lies there, breathing through his mouth because his nose is too clogged with blood, and every time he even tries to move his body seizes and it's all he can do not to scream.
o0o
He blacks out for what he thinks is only a few seconds, but when he opens his eyes again, it is nighttime, and there are dying embers in the depths of the ruined buildings and the cackle of crows from the dark treetops.
In front of him, a vulture swoops down and pecks at an arm peeking out from a fallen beam, tearing the flesh off the bone like it's nothing more than taffy, gorging itself on the raw muscle. Shizuo tries to roll over, but his body doesn't respond and the best he can do is turn his face to one side and vomit, the acid dribbling down his chin and making him even more nauseated through the putrid smell.
It is not silent, but without Kasuka's calm, gentle voice, Shizuo feels like a gray, static-filled blanket has been thrown over his eyes and ears, and he can't move, can barely breathe, and Kasuka is gone. His brother. The only one who understood him, supported him. They are miles and miles away by now, and Shizuo will never catch up at this point.
The panic that fills him makes his heartbeat explode into a hammering tirade, and his breaths speed up until he becomes lightheaded, and then he screams. He screams out of rage and fear and self-loathing, that he couldn't save his brother— that he wasn't strong enough to. His neck stretches out in the moonlight as he raises his head and screams, the rest of him broken and unresponsive.
o0o
Make me stronger.
0o0
"Hmm? But he's just a child!"
There is a mix of disdain and curiosity in that voice, and Shizuo opens his eyes to find an upside-down face hanging above him.
"Wha—?"
The face disappears, and Shizuo scrambles up onto his feet, body moving like a broken marionette, but working at least. He clenches his teeth against the dizziness and forces his legs to stand straight, though he rather suspects they're about to collapse again. He leans back to press his calf against a fence-post behind him for support, resisting the urge to reach out a hand too.
The man in front of him is tall and slender, delicately built. His skin is pale and unblemished, seeming to glow in the twilight, and his robes are iridescent, hemmed in fur whiter than snow, and fluttering like gossamer. A golden circlet adorns his forehead, and at his fingers glimmer half a dozen rings and tinkering bangles. Despite that, there is a frigid air to him, and Shizuo feels the hairs on his arms standing on end, prickling up at the sharp smile the man gives him. His hair is cropped short and merciless, and he stands in front of Shizuo, patronizing him with the attempted pity in his smile and the glimmer of curiosity in his eyes.
"What do you want?" Shizuo spits out, voice gravelly from disuse, but still the high-pitched tone of a child's, and he knows that in this condition, there is very little he can do. He is utterly powerless.
The man—nearly a creature, for there is nothing human about him that Shizuo can sense—tsks at him and says with a lilting voice that mimics the cheerful gurgle of a stream, "Now, now, that's no way to speak to a god."
Shizuo doesn't miss a beat as he retorts with startling simplicity, "You're not my god."
The man raises his eyebrows at that and starts laughing, the sound starting out as a low rumble in his throat and rising until it breaks out into a full-fledged cackle that doubles him over and forces him to rest his hands on his knees as he continues to laugh, shaking uncontrollably. The sound seems so inappropriate and tactless in this place, surrounded by bloated and burned corpses waiting only for time to lay a layer of dirt to create a proper cemetery.
When he calms down, wiping the corner of his eyes, he straightens back out and gives Shizuo a once-over. Shizuo feels like the man is trying to dig into his heart, dissect and analyze him, see past the trembling of his limbs and the voice shouting frantically in his head Find Kasuka, find him, find him, find him! Shizuo wants to listen to that voice, but something about this man, this creature, keeps him rooted to the spot, wary and ready to attack, a cat with its hackles raised.
"You're not afraid of me?"
"No." He doesn't trust him, and instinctively doesn't like him, but he's not afraid of him. He's afraid of other things—loneliness, powerlessness.
The creature tilts his head, taking a few steps closer, and he walks as if stepping on stones across a river.
"Are you saying you aren't afraid of anything?"
Shizuo scoffs, "Everyone's afraid of something," he says matter-of-factly, and the man blinks. After all, people either arrogantly claim to not be afraid of anything, or whimper out as a pathetic excuse what the child has said. This child does neither, leaving the truth uncolored by his bias.
The creature shrugs, "Truer words have never been spoken," he says, nodding to himself, then looks around, all with an air of imperiousness, satisfied with the knowledge that all is his to toy with, break and rebuild as he sees fit.
"You did quite a number on those," he says with a smirk, a lazy finger flicking towards the smashed skulls of the few soldiers Shizuo was able to get a hold of, "Impressive." Suddenly, his gaze becomes calculating, cold and cutting like a razor blade. "But not quite enough, is it?"
Shizuo grits his teeth, feels the cracks and splinters in his body and despite the sacrifice, there is still the absence of his brother, like the absence of air, choking him. "What would you know?"
A smile breaks out on the creature's face like splitting ripe fruit, "You can't hide it, you know. I heard you – I was called here by your need. In your darkest hour you called to me, and here I am, ready to lend a helping hand," he catches the look on Shizuo's face and laughs, the many chains and bangles hanging on his body jingling with his merriment, "Yes, yes, it's understandable that you're suspicious—after all, only bad things happen in this world, right? It would be just too good for a god to come out of nowhere and offer you the answer to your prayers! But you're lucky – I happened to be in the area. My work takes me far and wide, but it is destiny that we've met here. You needed me, and I am willing to answer that need!"
He twirls, and without losing momentum, comes to stand right in front of Shizuo, poking one slim, jeweled finger at Shizuo's bare chest, dragging it in a circle along the edges of the hole in Shizuo's tunic. "But I know what you want."
He smiles, and there is nothing kind in his smile.
"You want to be stronger, don't you?"
Shizuo's heart squeezes.
"I can give that to you."
The finger disappears, kissing his skin goodbye reluctantly, but it reappears instead on his head, combing through his dark brown locks, messy and coated in ashes and dirt and dried blood. His other hand reaches into his pocket and withdraws a small rabbit-skin pouch.
"It is the mineral of the gods. Wash yourself with this at the next river you come across. It will make you inhumanly strong."
Shizuo's heart flutters.
"But there is a price."
Shizuo's heart stops.
The man drags a finger, slowly, as if through sweet, sticky molasses, along a cut on his chest and Shizuo flinches, though the motion is nothing more than a grimace. His eyes stay fixed on the devil red eyes of the creature in front of him. The self-proclaimed god waits for an answer, and when none is forthcoming, places his palm flat above Shizuo's chest. Shizuo resists the urge to shudder at the cold touch and the feeling of violation that accompanies it. His instincts scream at him not to trust this creature, but at this point, what more does he have to lose? A sliver of the child that is barely as tall as a fence-post wants to hope. And after all, what price would be worth more than having Kasuka back?
"Half of your heart."
"You can have it."
The creature blinks, "Just like that?" when that steadfast gaze doesn't waver, he smirks, "Well, alright. Then the contract is sealed," he presses the pouch into Shizuo's hand, and with the other grips Shizuo's chest. Under his cold palm, Shizuo's heart beats thunderously.
"I take half of your heart in return for boundless strength."
I am so excited about this one! I have the ending and the general plot in mind, but not sure how to deal with... the particular side effects of this contract :)
By the way, this is important: is the writing style working so far? I have been very conflicted over whether to make it abstract/surreal like in the beginning paragraphs, or more detailed and concrete like when Izaya appears.