Broken Trust

Zebraboymom

Chapter One

Disclaimer: They do not belong to me.

Author notes: I couldn't let that look between Steve and Kono go unaddressed from the season finale. I'm glad she's not dead, but boy, what a mess to unravel. It's going to be torture waiting 3 months or more to find out some answers. In the meantime here's some Steve and Kono angst.

Steve's POV

Steve lay on his bunk staring up at the ceiling. There was no way he was going to sleep tonight, much less any night soon. He kept analyzing the look from Kono. She looked so sad and lost. He could tell she was fighting back tears as she swallowed hard. She kept her eyes on his. He couldn't seem to tear his away from hers either. Then the cameraman had told him to face forward and he looked away from her. It was almost impossible to accept that he was being booked. A mug shot would now exist of him. The governor was dead and Wo Fat had killed her. He tried to fight back the tears when he thought about going down as her murderer. He had liked her so much. She seemed so passionate about her job. He remembered her tearing up when they saved the ambassador's daughter. Now he replayed every case in his mind. Was she that way because of the case or because she knew she was secretly screwing him behind his back. What did she mean he wouldn't want to know more? Were his parents involved in this or were they killed because they knew about the corruption? I mean, my god, it went all the way to the top. Sitting in this cell all day and night was going to drive him insane. He needed answers. He needed his team. He needed to take that look in Kono's eyes away.

He had never seen her look at him in any way other than with total trust. Now he had damaged that trust. He knew he had. He was so fond of her. She had been a rookie when she joined the team a year ago and now he saw her as an equal in every way. She had made a few rookie mistakes, but every rookie does. For the most part she had handled herself better than he had expected. His thoughts began to wander. He pictured her in those hot pants when she went undercover. She instinctively knew what would get the old woman to talk. She knew it when she reached for the dog. He saw her smile when they returned all those college kids to their parents. Her smile that day lit up the room. He saw her teaching kids to surf. He loved walking into the room after she took out the lawyer who was there to kill Julie. He had run there so fast, thinking Kono was going to get killed. But Kono had taken her down and thrown her through a door. Chin told Kono, "You know there might be a few other things I could teach you, but I think you got the whole ass-kicking thing down." He lay there for another couple of hours just reminiscing about the year with his female detective. His hand went to his cheek when he remembered her soft kiss on his cheek the day she had missed graduation. They all had put on their dress uniforms and given her presents. She had leaned up at one point after she opened his gift and placed a soft kiss right there. Remembering that moment made him realize something. Somewhere along the road he had started to fall for this strong independent woman. He admired her, her trusted her and he liked being around her so much. How could he have missed that? He felt stupid lying there in the dark. It was so obvious. He was falling in love with Kono Kalakaua. So, he finally gets his head out of his…and he's in jail and likely going to prison for killing the governor. He would probably never see her again. He could get the death penalty or life in prison. He would never get to tell her how he felt. He couldn't put that on her when he would never be able to do anything about it. Besides, she hadn't shown any indication at all that she felt the same way. His misery was complete.

Kono's POV

Kono sat on the front steps of HPD. She felt lost. She had texted Danny three times and he hadn't responded. Chin's phone wasn't even on. She fought back tears as she texted Jenna asking if she could pick her up. The reply was immediate.

'Thank God you are all right. Give me ten minutes.'

The problem was Kono was anything but all right. She angrily swiped at the tears that were starting to form in her eyes. She couldn't get that look out of her mind. She had seen a lot of looks from Steve McGarrett over the last year, but she had never seen him look like that before. When their eyes locked at one point he had to look away for a second. She knew he was embarrassed and feeling guilty over her being there. They had both said so much in that look. I'm sorry. I'm worried about you. I'm innocent. I wish things were different. Was it possible I love you was in there as well? Her mind flashed through the year together. Finishing each other's sentences. His grin when she took out the fake lawyer. His surprise when she got the old lady to talk. His gratefulness when she helped him try to get the money back. His happy smile as he watched her walk among the college students and their families. His comment that he was the blonde guy in Chips when she said she thought that guy was hotter. His gentle voice as he congratulated her on graduating and gave her the gun she now cherished. It was his symbol of protection. She now knew without a doubt that the feelings she had been fighting all year were real. She had fallen head over heels in love with Steve McGarrett. She couldn't even pinpoint the date. She just knew she did with every fiber of her being. She also knew that Steve could never have done the thing he was being accused of and she was determined to fight for his freedom. She wondered if she would ever get to tell him how she felt. She realized she had been somewhat jealous of Jenna at first. Steve seemed to have a soft spot for her and they had this connection over Wo Fat. It made Kono feel a little left out, but right now she needed someone who knew what was going on and would understand her emotions. Kono looked up as Jenna swerved into the parking lot and pulled up to the front of the building. She was out of the car in an instant. Her kind face was filled with worry. Kono felt herself running down the steps and into Jenna's arms. The two women just hugged each other and cried. Kono was so glad she was there. Even though they didn't know each other very well, they knew the magnitude of what had happened today. They just stood there and hugged as police swarmed past them without a glance.

"I saw him."

"Who?"

"Steve. They were booking him and taking mug shots of him. He looked devastated Jenna. I just fell apart after they took him away. I couldn't stand it if I never saw him again."

"I know. When you love someone and you are unable to help them, it's hard."

"I…I never said I was in love with Steve."

"You don't have to. It's written all over your face. In case you aren't sure, he feels the same way."

"How do you know?"

"He watches you when you aren't looking. When he does look at you his eyes never stray from your face. It's like he's trying to memorize it. That is the look of a man in love."

"You're wrong."

"I'm actually pretty good at facial expressions and micro expressions. I was trained for that. It's what I did as an agent in analyzing crime photos."

"Oh."

"Yeah. Man in love. Woman in love. You never told him how you feel?"

"Never. I just kind of realized it today."

"He never said anything either?"

"No. As far as I knew, I was just a little sister like Mary. Now I may never get to tell him. I may never see him again."

"Yes you will. We can go to his arraignment and you can visit him in lock up."

"I won't be able to be alone with him and I need to tell him this when we are alone."

"Let's go to Steve's place. Danny's setting up a command center. He said Chin promised to let him know when the arraignment is."

The two women headed for Danny's place. When they arrived he was pacing back and forth on Steve's porch yelling into the phone.

"What do you want me to do Rachel? Just abandon him? Leave him to rot in jail for something he didn't do? I do love you. I just…I have to stay here for now and help Steve. Please say you understand. He's like family to me now Rachel. Rachel, don't hang up! Rachel! Dammit!"

Danny slammed his phone shut and looked up at the tear stained faces of the two women walking up the stairs. He opened his arms.

"Bring it in."

The three of them stood like that just hugging each other and drawing comfort from each other. Finally Danny pulled them both inside and called Kamekona to bring pizza and beer. Jenna finally spoke up as they sat there looking at each other.

"Kono saw Steve being booked. He didn't look like they hurt him…yet."

"Being in lock up is not going to be a piece of cake. He's put a lot of men in there. Lots of them are still waiting trial from his busts. I wonder if any of them will get overturned because of Steve's arrest."

"Probably not now, but if Steve is convicted, they could open every one of his old cases for scrutiny."

Kono was completely silent. She was sitting in Steve's favorite chair with her legs pulled up to her chest, resting her cheek on the top of them. Danny was worried about her.

"Talk to me Kono."

"I can't Danny. It's all just too raw right now. We have to call Mary. She would want to be here."

"I don't think we want to bring her here right now. She would be too emotional and that isn't going to do Steve any good. Maybe when we know more. Right now let's focus on what we know so far."

Danny's cell phone chirped and he picked it up.

"Talk to me Chin."

"Tomorrow at nine? Okay, thanks. We'll be there. I don't know. I have to talk to the other two and see. I'll ask Kamekona too. I know Steve said he had some savings from when his parents died. I'll get power of attorney if necessary. Okay Chin. Thanks for doing what you are."

Kono's voice was suddenly filled with anger at her cousin.

"Why is he calling? Didn't he crawl back to HPD?"

Danny stilled her with a look.

"He did that so he would be on the inside and be able to keep us informed, not because he's on their side Kono."

Kono felt guilt immediately. She should have known her cousin better than that. Her emotions were getting the better of her. She stood up and walked out on the front porch. Jenna and Danny shared a knowing look.

"She's in love with him isn't she?"

"Yes, Danny."

"He feels the same way doesn't he?"

"I think so."

"I had a feeling. Should I go to her?"

"No, I think we should give her a minute to let her emotions catch up with each other."

Kamekona pulled up in Steve's driveway and saw his little cousin sitting on the bottom step weeping. He climbed out and set the pizza and beer on top of his car. He walked up to her, bent down and picked her up like a little rag doll. He held her close like he had when she was a child and patted her back softly. He knew she just needed his comfort. She had always been that way. No words were necessary, just the holding and the patting. After a while he put her down and lifted her chin to look in her eyes.

"Why so glum little chum?"

"It's…"

"Steve. I know. We have to hang in there together. It will be okay little one."

"How do you know?"

"Because the two of you need to be together. It can be no other way."

Kono threw her arms around him again and hugged him to her.

"I love you Komekona."

"I love you little sis. Now come on. Nothing helps more than pizza and beer."

They went inside and talked for several hours. Danny needed to find out how much money each one of them would be able to contribute to Steve's bail if he even made bail. Jenna surprised them with a large sum of money. Everyone started to get tired after coming down from such an emotional day. Danny took the couch and Jenna headed to the guest room. Kono wandered into Steve's room. She searched through Steve's closet and pulled out one of his t-shirts. It smelled like him. She stripped down to her underwear and pulled the huge shirt over her head. Lying in Steve's bed with his smell all around her was comforting. She pulled his pillow over and cuddled up to it. Tears slipped quietly down her cheek until she cried herself to sleep.