Chapter 1 - La Belle
When I woke up, I couldn't see. All I could feel was my head and my neck. I couldn't move. I was breathing from a mask attached to my face. It was warm air, and felt perfect and crisp, but it did nothing to relieve the fear that had ignited in my head.
'Why can't I remember anything?!' I screamed in my head. 'Was I in an accident? A coma? Was I dead?!'
I turned my head but found it couldn't move very far - my neck was extremely stiff. Tears pooled in my eyes, but I couldn't wipe them off. They rolled down my cheeks, over my chin, and dropped onto torso.
"Paralyzed," I whispered, my throat hoarse and sore. That didn't stop the bloodcurdling scream that ripped out a moment later.
I was having a panic attack. The oxygen that I breathed in was getting shorter and shorter, and I screamed again, more tears burning my eyes.
Suddenly, I heard the door opening, and people rushed in. I heard voice after voice beg me to calm down, but their pleas only pushed me to scream again. My neck was stinging, and I started to blackout.
'Sedatives,' My mind whispered before I fell back asleep.
When I woke up, I still couldn't see, but I had been propped up. The oxygen mask was no longer on my face, however, I supposed I was still in the same room. It had the same clean, scrubbed-down smell.
But, I guess every hospital room smells the same.
This time, just after I had waken up, there was a light beep next to me. And another. And another.
'A heart monitor,' I guessed, 'It seems to be normal-'
Then I remembered my position.
The beeps sped up, and so did my breaths.
As if on que, the door flung open, but only one person entered.
"Hello. My name is Dr Ecel," A lady said in a very professional manner.
"I don't know my name," I whispered, my voice extremely hoarse from screaming earlier.
"You don't?" She asked, her strong voice wavering,"But that's to be expected. You hit your head very hard in that accident."
"I can't see," I coughed out, my breathes becoming shorter. The heart monitor beside me started to speed up.
"You'll eventually ease into your vision again, but I can't promise it'll be the same-"
"I can't move," My voice rising along with my fear.
"It was a very bad accident," Her voice was closer, "The car was completely flipped over when the ambulance arrived-"
"I can't move!" I yelled, tears starting in my eyes.
"This is very hard for me. Please-"
"I can't fucking move!" I screamed.
'Hard for her?! HARD FOR HER?! I'm paralyzed!'
"You might get feeling back into your chest and the beginning of your arms, but your spinal chord was severely broken. There's not much we can do-"
I screamed over and over. I didn't want to stop, no matter how much Dr Ecel pleaded with me. I wanted to die.
I was sedated again. I fell back asleep.
I had no life.
No name, no family, no movement in my body.
I couldn't see, and I was overly calm on the pills they had given me.
I felt like a dog that had broken all of its legs. It would just be better to put me down.
It wasn't fair. I didn't do anything. I had high grades. I always did my work. I got this off of the information Dr Ecel provided me. The woman came into my room now and then to talk. She told me about my family. They had all died in the car accident.
I envied them.
Ecel and I talked alot, but mostly her - my throat was still healing. She told me about myself. I had black hair and hazel eyes. But to her, she said, they looked more golden.
I asked about my face, and she paused, considering her answer.
"You have pale skin," She paused again, "a small nose, a nice smile."
"Average?" I asked.
"A good average." She said truthfully. I was content, for the moment. At least my face wasn't ugly.