Author's Note: If you dislike goofy shit, don't read this.
In Skyhold's courtyard, Cole huddled beside a rain barrel watching Cassandra. She was currently engrossed in Varric's latest porn novel. She sat on a bench, occasionally standing up to walk around, her eyes never leaving the pages. She talked aloud to herself now and then in response to something that happened in the book.
"That big? Impossible!"
"What? No! How could she?"
"Gasp! So brave!"
"Oh, but what about the feathers?"
The Iron Bull heard her talking and approached. "What are you...?" He trailed off when he saw the book. Too late, Cassandra hid it behind her back.
"It's nothing, please, just...go away." She tried hard not to blush.
Bull laughed. "Come on, there's nothing to be ashamed of. Let me tell you about the time I-"
"NO!" She cut him off. "I don't want to hear it."
"But-"
"If you don't get out of here right now, I'm going to...hit you with something big!" She said awkwardly.
"Sounds like something I'd be into." Bull chuckled and took a step forward in an attempt to snatch the book.
Cassandra flung the lusty book a few feet away, grabbed the bench, and decked him over the head. The bench cracked in two and Bull fell to the ground.
"Oh!" Cassandra gasped. She meant to hit him hard, but...oh, who was she kidding? She really did mean to hit him that hard. Haha!
Bull could see stars floating in his vision. He gingerly checked his skull to see if it was bleeding. Nope.
"Uuugh, what was that for? Why am I over here? Were...were we training?" He looked at Cassandra for answers. He couldn't remember!
"Oh, oh yes. Training. We were training. Well, I think that's enough for today..."
Cole suddenly appeared and interrupted. "You were amused by Cassandra's interest in this book, although I don't understand why." He held up the sexy book for all to see.
"Now I remember!" Bull was delighted.
"Dammit, Cole!" Cassandra made the most disgusted face.
"I think it's great you are into that kind of thing." Bull said, a bit shyly.
"Nooooooooo!" Cassandra wailed and snatched the book from Cole. She ran off and hid in some bushes.
At last, she could read in peace.
THE END.