I don't own Transformers or anything like the canon characters here!

I do own Feenixfire Lockheart however, as she is my own OC.

I do not own Gearchange, Vanguard (wherever you are you git, hope your doing well), Nitro Gear, Earthshaker and Sabre, they all belong to friends and members of Transformers Galaxy Roleplay forums.

On nights like these, the dark and the stormy nights of Cybertron. I cannot sleep, I won't sleep, I only hide and cower and cover myself from the howls of the outside. They say the howls of the winds are predacon souls that are lost and wandering with no bodies, the acid rain are the tears of a snake that lost its true love to war and cries to the night.

I have never liked the rain or the winds, I used to curl up against my mother on nights like this. Or my blankets of feathers. But no longer do these things bring me such comfort, even though I am in a safe place.

On nights like these I wander the corridors of the base, the mechs around here avoid me or gape and gawk at me, like they don't know if they should be scared of me or marvel at my wildness. They are fine ones to talk, Squadron X and the Wreckers in general are a bunch of misfits, I just look the part.

They have no idea how to treat me, with kindness, fear or ignorance. Predacons like me still have a bad reputation around Cybertronians, we are still viewed as primitive, savage and wild. Primus' freaks that turned from hunting game into beasts that can walk on two legs and talk with forked tongues, ha! They are the freaks if anything.

I keep walking around the corridors of the Wrecker base, the winds still howling and getting louder, the acid rain banging against the roof. Couple that with all the little noises of air conditioning, piping and electrics and it felt like an assault of the senses.

It wasn't just the winds that kept me awake. Thoughts. Thoughts have kept me awake, troubling thoughts and feelings. Something I want to find someone to talk about, but who would understand me?

Maybe one mech would in the Primus forsaken place.

My wanderings carry me to his office door, I could hear two mechs talking over the restless night outside. I knock on the door and wait for an answer, moving the feathers that make up my helm about a bit to look, at the least, awake.

'Enter,' said the old voice.

I push open the door and see an old red and black mech speaking to a green and grey mech, both were old but the latter was the oldest by far, the wrinkles in his metal and the scars told their tales of experience. The other mech had scars but nothing to show his age, but I can tell his mind is heavy with past grief and loss, then again all wreckers have a bad past.

The red and black mech looked at me then gave a nod of goodbye to the older mech, then a nod to me in greeting as he turned and headed out. He always liked me he did, he must have seen something in me to agree to train me up, when this old mech was famous for his lack of patience in younglings like myself.

The grey mech looked at me and then gave a concerned smile, puffing away at his cy-gar. That Primus damned nasty cy-gar, what crap has he got in that? I have never seen anyone but an Elder Dragon smoke that much. He gave a cough and says in his grizzled yet kind voice, 'Miss Lockheart, on your nighttime wanderings again?'

'Yes Commander Kup,' I say, looking down as I choose not to meet his eye.

He sits back on his chair and gestures for me to sit down on the chair across from his, I comply and sat down, my claws on my knees. He puffs away on the cy-gar and looks at a file, nodding before taking out that nasty device.

'Vanguard says your training score is improving with each day that goes by, he has noticed you don't play in a team way though, is he right?'

'Yes Commander Kup.'

He narrows his optics a bit and looks me up and down a bit, before raising an optic brow and continuing with the report, 'what is this on the report saying you attacked and took a chunk out of our scientist Perceptor?'

I snarled and gave him a wild look, showing my teeth and flexing my facial muscles like a big cat, but I knew this wouldn't scare him, he was one of the handful of bots that wasn't scared of me.

'He tried to give me an injection sir, I kept saying no to it, my immune system is good enough without your strange science. So I bit his arm and ran.'

That was a lie in one sense, her immune system was good against Predacon diseases, not Cybertronian. She had been ill as of late with bad forms of normal colds and coughs as her body was getting use to living with Cybertronians and not her own species.

Kup looked over the report at me and frowned in a, I'm not amused, way. He then leans back on the chair and continued the report, 'Ultra Magnus and Springer says your Cybertronian lessons are going well, I know it's hard learning two different languages but you'll get there. Has Gearchange been helping you?'

My stomach felt sick at even the mention of Gear's name, but why? I ain't scared of him at all, if anything he is the most decent and nicest one out of this sorry bunch. He is my friend… but even saying that now sounds wrong. I have known Gearchange for 4 (earth age equivalent) years now, I have grown from adolescent to young lady, been on countless missions with him and even nearly watched him die… that's when this troubling feeling started, after he was nearly killed in battle.

As I thought about this, I must've not answered Kup, which caused him to raise an optic brow at this. He repeats the question but I refuse to answer him with anything other a nod. He narrows his optics and puts the report on the table, switching from commander to friend and confidant.

'Feenix. What's wrong youngling?'

'Nothing.'

'Quit lying to me Feenix, I think after everything we have been through, I like to think that we at least trust each other to tell the truth.'

I take my time to answer him, hissing to myself as I debated in my head if I should tell him, but I know he is a good friend and I know he wouldn't tell unless it was a threat to the wreckers. I sigh deeply and say, 'Gearchange is making a recovery after what happened.'

'Ai lass he is, he should be out of the medbay soon, you been visiting him?'

I give a nod to this and continue, 'yeah, I visit every day when I can. He likes it when I visit him, I miss his presence in the room.'

Kup narrows his optics at this, slowly getting what was going on here, he looks to the reports again. He read Vanguard's reports about her working in a team, a postscript was added and it said… "Feenix only seems to work together with my other student Gearchange, I have seen this in battle as well as in training. She only listens to him and they work in sync when it comes to tag team battles."

He looked at me and gave a soft smile on his old face, he then clears his throat and says, 'Feenix, what is bothering you?'

I look him in the optics and answer him, 'you promise not to go crazy?'

'Promise.'

'Alright… ever since that day… ever since Gearchange nearly died… I have felt something different about him, I don't know what it is though. I'm not angry at him, well, maybe I am a bit for being a fool hardy idiot at times, but there is another feeling.'

Kup was putting this together in his head and as he did, the smile grew warmer and more understanding, 'go on youngling.'

'I don't want him to leave me… I don't want him to die.'

'No one wishes anyone to die Feenix.'

'No no! That's not what I mean! I mean… he makes me feel happy, glad I exist. He makes me smile and feel welcome in your world, when your world despises what I am. He helps me, reminds me to keep myself clean and nice specially on days when I wonder why I even try to be like you. I feel warm around him and relaxed, I trust him and he trusts me, despite having no reason for either of us to trust each other.'

Kup lets me finish and he smiles softly with his optics, once stern, now kind and understanding. He puffs on his cy-gar and then says, 'I see, do you feel sick when you're around him or when someone asks you about him? Do you worry when he doesn't answer a comm or when he's not around?'

I give a small nod, not trusting myself to speak. Kup got up from his seat and walked over to the front of the desk, he then sits on it in front of me and takes that cy-gar out of her mouth.

'You're in love aren't you?'

I felt offended by this at once and snarl loudly at him, but that just made him chuckle and continue, 'drop the tough act Feenix, people have noticed your odd behaviour around Gear as of late. I brushed it off as rumours made by the others. But maybe they were right, maybe you ARE in love. You could do worse, way worse, but Gearchange is a good lad, a very good lad. He just has luggage like we all have wee lass.'

I frown sadly at this, he was right about what I felt, was that what love felt like? I look at him and say in a sad tone, 'but it's bad thoughts, forbidden thoughts… a predacon and a Cybertronian. It's wrong on every level of the Messengers (The Thirteen Primes) and the Creator (Primus) himself… It's an animal and civilised mech, it's wrong and damning.'

Kup looked confused at this and blinks, he knew Predacons had a high moral and spiritual code but he wasn't aware there might have been social no-goes about Cybertronians. He shakes his head and says, 'love is love Feenix, you clearly care about Gearchange and it's clear you don't know how to process your feelings for him. Why do Predacons have a no go rule on dating Cybertronians?'

'Why do you think!?'

'Calm down, I get it. We hunt you, pushed away both your kind and your prey away from your homelands and you had to live in places no Cybertronian would set up shop so to speak. But is there actually a rule against it? Or is it a social thing?'

I had to think about it for a minute, all predacons know the laws and the rules of their clan and predacon society by heart due to our honour. But I couldn't remember anything in the rules about Cybertronian/Predacon relationship, but I suspected it was to do with family honour and was a more private affair rather than actual punishment from the Elders of the Clans.

I shake my head at this and Kup puffs on his cy-gar. He puts a hand on my shoulder and says, 'then what is stopping you? If he loves you back th…'

'I don't want him to reject me,' I butt in, 'I don't want to ruin our friendship.'

'I have seen him around you, when you get hurt or you struggle in training. I have seen the look he has gave you. I think he has thought the same as you youngling, and has held back for a the same reason.'

He got up and looked out the window at the pounding rain, before continuing, 'we wreckers have a high mortality rate, we have to find happiness and joy however we can, whenever we can, no matter how small the amount. If you feel the way you do and he does too, you both should find happiness together, no matter how little or long it my last. You never know when you will see the next sunrise.'

I nod at this, I knew he was right. He was the oldest Wrecker here, and Primus knows what he has seen. Maybe he had experienced something like this but never acted on it, I don't know.

He walks behind the desk and looks at his messages and smiles, 'he's being discharged today, the medics gave him the all clear. He just needs rest and recovery now, maybe even some love and care. Don't be afraid to be honest and to ask him, sometimes we all need someone looking out and caring for us.'

I get up and bow in thanks like all Predacons do, he returns the bow and I head out to the medbay to find Gearchange.