A/N: So, this story has been playing in mind for a while, so here it is! This story is set ten years after the girls graduated high school and everything is canon before that point – so all the stuff that has happened in 6b and season 7 is not relevant to this story. There will of course, be plenty of angst as is a common theme in my stories but there will also be a little more romance than usual, eventually. Please, please let me know what you think in the reviews and whether this is worth continuing – I have a bunch of ideas for this and have always wanted to write an AU, older Hanna Marin, Caleb Rivers and Haleb.
All reviews will be so gratefully received as this will probably be the least darkest of my stories, so I'd love to know what people think!
"You look as good as good as the day I met you, I forget just why I left you, I was insane... stay, play that Blink 182 song that we beat to death in Tuscon, okay. I know it breaks your heart, moved to the city in a broke down car and four years no call, and now I'm looking pretty in a hotel bar and I can't stop." - The Chainsmokers & Halsey
At twenty-eight years old, Hanna Marin would have answered the question of how she felt about her life since high school with just one word – satisfactory. Maybe the sixteen year old version of herself would have hated that answer because she had expected so much more, but the eighteen year old version would have felt relieved that despite everything they had gone through and everything that had happened, things had turned out okay. She glanced down at the drink that was placed in front of her, before she looked up to thank the bartender. The free drinks she got whenever she visited Rosewood at the hotel her mother had put so much work into was the only thing that made the visit to that town worth it.
Over the past ten years, she had only been back to Rosewood a handful of times that included a total of two Christmas parties with her mom, the court appeal and subsequent death of Charlotte DiLaurentis after she threw herself from the church bell tower, Emily's fathers funeral and the birth of Aria's baby. She had successfully avoided Rosewood and the hell it brought with it as much as she possibly could, and thus, finding herself back there because of the attachments she had made to the people who had remained there. Sometimes, she wished she could have just cut them all off but the longest they had gone without talking to each other was around six months when she discovered her ex-boyfriend and her best friend were a little closer than she would have liked.
The blonde ran her fingers through her hair, before her hands moved down to pull the dress she was wearing a little further down when she saw a man approach her. "Do you mind if I sit here?" He asked, a small smirk on his face that told her everything she needed to know about him, "Yes, I do mind." She replied, lifting the drink to her lips, turning her head from him so he would get the rather obvious hint that she simply was not interested. She was in Rosewood for one reason and one reason only – a wedding. She would attend, she would smile, she would give the happy couple her gift, drink some alcohol from the free bar and sneak away when no one was watching. She loved her friends, she truly did but ten years was a long time for them to grow as individuals and thus, grow apart. With a small sigh, her eyes glanced down at her phone, quickly downing the rest of the drink when she noticed the time – the last time she had been seen in Rosewood was three years prior when Catherine was born and she could only hope she would be as lucky to have to wait another three years before she was forced to return for another event again.
Spencer and Hanna had left Rosewood behind, but five years ago, when Charlotte died, Aria had made the decision to stay in the town she had once hated as much as them in order to be with the man she still loved. Her and Ezra, after five years apart, eloped to Italy for a beautiful wedding and then, just a year later, gave birth to the most precious baby girl. Aria was the first, and at that current time, the only one of them to have a child; Spencer was involved in politics and went back to Rosewood just as often as Hanna did but after whatever had happened between her and Caleb, hers and Hanna's relationship had been strained at best, so the blonde wasn't entirely certain what was going on with her best friend and her life away from the town that had made their lives hell. Emily, similar to Aria, hadn't left after the suicide of their torturer; she had gone to finish college in Rosewood, she had taken a job in their old high school and eventually, had ended up marrying in Rosewood.
And that was how Hanna had found herself in the Radley that day, hating that her dress seemed several inches shorter than it had been when she bought it, about to attend the wedding of Emily Fields and Alison DiLaurentis, feeling wholeheartedly bitter about the entire experience. She had a good life away from the place she had grown up, and whilst she hated how much it hurt her mother to see how much Hanna loathed behind there, she couldn't help how much she missed everything that was the life she had made for herself. She was twenty-eight years old and she was on the path she never thought she would be – when she was a teenager, she had only ever imagined herself following one path and that path had involved being married to Caleb, probably having at least two children by her current age whilst she worked in the fashion industry. None of those things had come true, but then, she supposed, life didn't always go the way in which people expected or wanted. But she had a good life in Boston, but she found herself being dragged back for various reasons to the place that brought up too many bad memories.
And too many bad people, she quickly reminded herself when she looked up and her eyes met, for the first time in five years, with the man she had once sworn she would love until the day she died. She had seen him briefly, after Spencer had called to let him know that they would have to be attending the funeral of the person who haunted their nightmares, and he had come running and for the first time, it wasn't to comfort her. With a small sigh, she put her best 'work face' on and walked over to him, knowing they would be attending the same event anyway, so there was no need to prolong the awkward tension that would be between them since she had told him to get the hell out of their apartment and go travel Europe on his own, eight years before, "Caleb." She coldly greeted, ignoring the shock on his face when she had approached him for the first time.
"Hanna..." He murmured back, looking her up and down, causing her to raise a brow before her glare settled on him, "You seriously should think twice about checking me out, maybe I'll tell Spencer." There was no attempt to hide her bitterness at that, because even at twenty-eight, she wasn't able to get over the fact her best friend and her ex-boyfriend had even entertained the idea that they should be together for even a moment.
Caleb looked confused for just a second, before he spoke, "Spencer and I bro-" The woman gave him a pointed look that said she already knew exactly what happened but didn't want to discuss it. "Are you going to the wedding?" He asked, nervously scratching the top of his head as he shifted on his feet, a small frown on his face. Their eyes met once again, for just a second, only stopped by the rolling of Hanna's eyes, "No, I'm going to miss my best friends wedding." The tone of her voice was laced in sarcasm and it only caused the uncomfortable look on his face to increase. It made her feel powerful to know how much she intimidated him and it was what caused the smirk on her face before she turned on her heel and walked out of the door, without another word or another look at the man she had once imagined an entire life with.
Before she could get to the large gates, he had caught up, his hand stopping her from moving another step forward when he placed it on the gate that had been her escape route, "I'm driving... do you want a lift? I'm going anyway and we don't have to talk or even look at each other but it just seems stupid." He was nervous, she could hear it in his voice, she could see it in his eyes and it only caused the smirk on her face to deepen with every passing second. She almost felt as though she was back in work and he was the petty criminal who was terrified of every word she spoke and every movement she made. With a small shrug of her shoulders, she nodded her head, "Sure..."
He seemed satisfied with that answer, relaxing enough to give her a small smile, before he headed in the direction of his car. Hanna could only shake her head at herself, wondering if this was going to be a huge mistake because any time she spent with Caleb always ended up being a horrendous mistake. True to his word, they didn't say another word to each other when she sat in the front of his car, her eyes only remaining on the view from the window. "You still in Boston?" He spoke, and her eyebrow raised as she turned to look at him, knowing it was just ten more minutes in the car with him before they got to the DiLaurentis house where the wedding was to be held. "I thought you said this ride would be in silence," She half-teased, half-warned him before she bit down on her lip and then nodded her head; her walls were always up, especially when she was around him but she also knew he wasn't the only one to blame for their break-up or the subsequent events that followed.
"I'm still in Boston, I'm a Homicide Detective now..." She trailed off, the words still sounded foreign on her own tongue whenever she spoke to someone who knew the pre-college version of herself. When she was eighteen years old and she had made the decision to attend New York University to study Fashion Design but that had lasted a short period of time before she found herself sneaking into the back of Criminology and Psychology lectures just to try and understand what she had gone through and what she was still going through. It had just taken a month for her to change her degree, and for a while, everything had been good. Things were falling into place; Hanna had found something she was passionate about apart from what she was going to wear and what other people were going to wear. After everything that had happened to them, she supposed, in the end, she had something to thank Charlotte for.
It was during summer break before her Junior year of college that Caleb decided they should do something together, something exciting and something new that would bring them closer together. Instead of the excitement he had been anticipating, she had shot him down quickly – she had already made plans that included a volunteer scheme she had been accepted onto that would take up much of her plans for the few months he wanted to spend relaxing but Hanna had found something she was great at and she wasn't willing to give it up for a few months of fun in Europe. And thus, arguments had ensued and soon enough, he was walking out of the door and she didn't see him again until they landed in Rosewood three years later.
She still hated him, of that she was sure, but she had loved him at one point and that was the side of herself she would never be able to forget. She was meant to be married to him, she was meant to have had his kids, they were meant to be happy but then, she wasn't sure she would have the same life she had right then. What had started as an attempt to understand herself, had turned into something that became her entire life. Once she had graduated, she knew she had to leave the tiny apartment she had once loved so much and in turn, she had to leave New York behind – at some point, she had adored the city and all the memories she had made and was going to make there but then it was tainted with the person she had lost because her own ambition had gotten in the way.
She shook her head and took a deep breath, trying to distract herself from her own thoughts when Caleb spoke, "Wow, that's... wow." His head nodded, his eyes focused on the road and Hanna copied his movements, feeling as though she was suffocating in the awkward tension of the car. There was an overwhelming relief when he pulled up outside the house she had been seeking out with her eyes since the last word that had fallen from his lips. Hanna was entirely certain she had chased after criminals slower than the rate she had gotten out of the car, a murmured thank you falling from her lips before she lost herself in the extremely large crowd that had formed on the front yard of the DiLaurentis household. Caleb had barely gotten out of the car by the time she had pushed her way through to the front door, taking just a second to remind herself to force a huge grin on her face and pretend as though she was happy to be in Rosewood.
And then, the moment she walked into the house that looked so different now that it was a home that Alison and Emily shared, she realised everything she had missed out on. Her friends were all there, with their respective partners if they had one, and most importantly, the beautiful baby girl she had met just a handful of times but had spoken to so many times via Skype. They were laughing, and joking and for a moment, no one noticed her walking in until a happy "Aunt Hanna!" Was heard from the hyperactive toddler who ran (stumbled) towards the blonde, who outstretched her arms to greet her with a laugh when her arms finally wrapped around her, "Hi beautiful," She kissed the top of the little girls head and held her close to her as she smiled, she may have hated Rosewood but she had missed the things that remained in Rosewood more than she had ever allowed herself to admit.
With a one armed hug to all of her friends in turn, as she held the toddler on her hip, she wondered if her life surrounded by all these people all the time, would have made her life more than the satisfactory life she held in Boston. Small talk was made, and Hanna was more than happy to play babysitter to the girl she barely got to see as often as she would have liked as they waited for the wedding to start. "Hey, didn't Alison say this was going to be a small event?" She questioned, when she looked around – of course, she didn't expect anything less from the woman she had yet to see because it was bad luck for Emily to see the bride before the big moment.
Emily scoffed as she downed what was left in her champagne glass, her eyes looking around at the crowds of people that seemed to be taking over the house. The rest of them let out a laugh and nodded their own heads, none of them actually expecting Alison to have made anything less than a huge deal of her wedding day. And whilst Alison and Emily were the last two people Hanna had expected to get married, but she could just tell by the smile on her best friends face that she was beyond happy. Hanna was the last person out of the five of them that anyone would have expected to become a single, career focused woman, and she could always tell by the constant prying questions about her love life that it was the last thing anyone could have expected for the way Hanna had turned out.
The wedding was just as spectacular as Hanna had expected it would be – the sun was shining, the yard had been turned into a beautiful, flower covered and for the first time, Hanna got to witness the love between two of her best friends and she understood how she was sitting there right then when she had struggled to believe it beforehand. It wasn't until afterwards that she remembered the master manipulator that Alison had always been when her eyes settled on the names of the table she was expected to sit at – of course, as she expected, there was Aria and Ezra, Catherine, Spencer and whatever the name of her boyfriend was that Hanna had already forgotten, herself and then... Caleb.
Rosewood was her own idea of her personal hell, but as her ex-boyfriend sat down next to her with a huge smile on his face that told her just how satisfied he was that they had been stuck together, she realised just how awful her short trip was going to turn out to be. His mouth opened to talk and she turned around to settle her glare on Alison, only to be met with a knowing smirk on Emily's face who just wiggled her eyebrows. "I'm going to kill you," She mouthed, only for Emily to turn back to her wife to whisper something in her ear and Hanna had to turn back to face the people on the table she was meant to share, but who all seemed preoccupied with each other, and finally, she was forced to turn to the man who had a sparkle in his eyes and a small smirk on his face, waiting for him to say whatever the hell he had to say so she could find a way to shoot him down and ignore him for the rest of the night.
"So, did Emily and Alison tell you I'm moving to Boston?"