Brains Unsuited For Shopping

Disclaimer: I make no owning here.

Summary: Jack and Ianto decide to do what any parents who are expecting a child do – go shopping. Ianto/Jack. Sixty-seventh in the "Immortal Janto" series.

I sort of touched on this one in a previous story, but I've never really shown how the boys are when they have to shop for baby clothing, especially given the fact that their first is now out of university and has a boyfriend of her own. *tee hee*

Anyways, enough of me rambling – onwards to the story!

Jack got grumpy whenever he was rushed and pregnant. Ianto distinctly remembered how he got when he was pregnant with Annabelle and he was no better this time around. In fact, he was pretty damn sure that Jack was worse this time around and that was saying something for Jack. The 51st century former con-man and ex-Time Agent could hardly keep himself in check when he was in such a state – and that pissed everyone else off enormously.

Which made the TARDIS on the whole pretty tense every now and again.

That being said, Ianto was actually looking forward to going shopping with Jack for new baby clothes.

It had been a very long time since they had had appropriate baby clothes and, even though Annabelle's baby clothing was in perfect condition, stored on the TARDIS, it had been decided that this baby would have new clothing. To top it off, Ianto hadn't gone with Jack and Donna when they had gone shopping for baby clothing for Annabelle. In retrospect, he wished that he had been a part of that, but it was too late for those types of regrets now. On the flip side though, Jack and Ianto were hell-bent on spoiling the crap out of this kid. Annabelle had gotten the best and so would her unborn sibling.

That's what led the two to go shopping in a nice, out-of-the-way store in London in 4315. The store catered to a variety of species and sexes and no one looked at Jack funny for being pregnant.

Which, as much as Ianto hated to admit it, was what Jack would have gotten, had they gone shopping in the 21st century.

In retrospect, Ianto should have brought along a camera to record this particular outing for posterity's sake – or to prove to their unborn child that Jack went on at least one warpath while pregnant with said child. Either reason would have worked really. It would have been hilarious to show to everyone back on the TARDIS, once Jack had gotten off the warpath, that is. Briefly, he considered nipping back to the TARDIS and seeing what he could scrounge up there before Jack noticed that he was gone.

However, Ianto could not dwell on that belated decision any more. Jack was currently having a rather in-depth conversation with one of the sales associates about the colors that they kept in stock for an entirely garish onesie.

Ianto groaned and rolled his eyes, walking over to intervene, if not for the sales associate's sake, then for Jacks health.

"We are not getting sparkly alcohol-themed onesies for our child, Jack," he said, very straight-faced, as he wrapped his arm around his husband's waist.

Jack looked at him and gave that sexy pout of his that Ianto very rarely said no to – and realized that this was, in fact, one of those few and far-between times when Ianto did not cave when he used that look. The pregnant man gave a hefty sigh, handing the onesie back to the sales associate, before looking back to Ianto, humor in his eyes.

"Nothing I can do to make you change your mind?" he asked.

Ianto shook his head vehemently.

"Did Annabelle have anything like that when she was a baby?" Ianto replied.

Jack chuckled at that thought. "No, but, now that you mention it, I wish that we had gotten something like that for her when she was a baby. It would have made for an excellent story and we would have so many embarrassing photographs to show to Andy."

"More than we already do?"

There was no way that Jack could argue with that point. They had an entire computer hard drive, as well as a few dozen drawers, of photographs from Annabelle's childhood and young adult period – which they were both continuing adding to, despite the fact Annabelle was an adult now.

"So we should stick with the normal baby clothing then?" Jack finally questioned, raising an eyebrow. There was a little grin on his face, one that Ianto had long ago learned to recognize for what it was. "Which color palate do you think we should pick out?"

A groan escaped his lips as they browsed through the racks and shelves of clothing.

"I thought we agreed that we were going to wait until the baby was born to find out if we're having a boy or a girl," he reminded Jack gently. Jack huffed miserably, a clear sign that something had happened. Ianto's head shot up. "Wait? You know?"

"The TARDIS slipped up one day. She's terribly excited and she accidentally let it out," Jack admitted, after a few seconds. "If it makes you feel better, she's been apologizing profusely ever since and she's offered to modify my memory so I don't remember until after the baby is born."

Ianto crossed his arms. "That's why we haven't been getting lost for the last few weeks, isn't it?" Jack nodded in confirmation. "Well, I still don't want to know until the baby arrives."

"What about me?"

Grinning, Ianto moved closer to Jack, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

"That's up to you, but, whatever you do, please don't spoil this for me, okay?"

Jack nodded.

And, hours later, when they were back on the TARDIS after a rather successful day of shopping – all in gender-neutral colors, thank you very much, and all the items purchased the equivalent of what was expected for a 21st child – Jack came bounding into their suite, a broad, bright smile on his lips. He settled down onto the loveseat next to Ianto. The Welshman set the book that he had been reading down on the side table, twisting to put an arm around his friend, lover, husband, and bearer of his children.

Jack leaned his head onto Ianto's shoulder. He sighed happily.

"I can't wait for the baby to arrive," he said, hand on his now-noticeable stomach.

"Neither can I," Ianto agreed, kissing Jack on the cheek. His voice was light and very happy.

"Think we'll settle down, like we did when Annabelle was growing up?" Jack asked, after a few seconds of silence.

Ianto paused to consider what Jack was saying.

"Probably," he replied. "We'll have to wait for the baby to be born before we can make any decisions on that front though. I'd rather not have to deal with a move when you're pregnant. You tend to be something of a nightmare when the hormones hit you."

"I do not!" Jack protested, pressing a hand to his chest, giving Ianto a very over-dramatic face. Ianto giggled at the sight. Jack sniffed. "Regardless, this child is going to have a great life."

"Boy or girl, we'll love it to bits and pieces."

A sweet, happy smile crossed Jack's lips at that little statement.

"I suppose we'll have to wait until it arrives to find out which one it is though," Jack said idly.

The sentence sunk in and Ianto held Jack a little bit tighter.

Silently, he thanked the TARDIS for what she did, glad that Jack would share the same excitement that he did, the moment when their child officially joined the universe and they found out if it was a boy or a girl. Jack wasn't a big fan of memory modifications, but Ianto knew that this was one of those rare occasions that he had made an exception for – and that made him even more proud of Jack.

"Not too much longer now," Ianto declared.

Well? What did you think of this? Like? Dislike?

Anyway, yes, I know – I was something of a tease about revealing more about the baby, but I am planning on keeping it a secret for a little bit longer. Only those lucky 23 people I told know and I thank them for keeping it silent for this long. Like I said before, not much longer until the new baby is born and then all will be revealed.

But, as I always say, I am a slave to the Muse and I will post the next story when She lets me.