Spandex
Chapter One: In the beginning. With Aliens.
A/N: Have you ever wondered...No? Well, jeez. I sure have.
Note: It's a sad story about a boy, and his lack of proper clothing. Okay, no, it's mostly just a story about how strange Teen Titans can be. Oh, and there's lots of Starfire and Robin bashing. It's not that I have anything against them. It's just that they're so very easy to make fun of. And I can't resist things like that.
Disclaimer: Honestly, if I owned a strangely sucessful show like TT, would I be here writing humorous fanfiction about it? No. I would be bathing in my vats of money.
Beast Boy was saddened when he realized something.
He only wore spandex.
SPANDEX!
When had this started? When had all of the group's outfit gone from relatively normal to SPANDEX? Sure, Raven had always been like that, but Raven was scary as all crap. (A/N: For my purposes, the big BB likes to curse inside his head) She sent him an evil look as if she guessed his thoughts over the tofu that he was serving the group. Or maybe it was the tofu that made her angry.
How could anybody not like tofu? Clearly, she was a mind-reader.
He examined the other members of the group as they ate. Starfire sported her usual sleek outfit of a purple spandex shirt and short skirt. With those boots. So basically she was Britney Spears, except an alien. But is Britney Spears truly human? Beast Boy played the twilight zone music in his head for the best effect and decided it was entirely possible.
He skipped over Raven. She seemed to be noticing he was staring at Star. Did that annoy her or something? As soon as he met her eyes she looked down and ate tofu. He knew she liked it.
More importantly, he noticed she was wearing a swimsuit. What the hell was a superhero doing wearing a swimsuit? Before now he had never thought of that. The cloak (spandex also) was typical Raven, but the swimsuit was most defintely not.
Damn aliens, taking over everywhere.
He examined Robin next. Heh heh. Robin. Green and red should never by put together unless it's Christmas, and even then you have to be careful.
Another thing considered about Robin's clothing: did he always keep that mask on? Was there a time that Beast Boy had seen him without it? Seen his actual eyes? He bet Star had. Muwaha.
Then he went on to Cyborg. Hm. Mostly metal. He probably had spandex somewhere. Beast Boy would search diligently.
And last came himself. He was green. He was wearing purple spandex. Whatever. He would wear jeans and a t-shirt tomorrow, and only hell freezing over would stop him.
A/N: Well I wonder where he keeps those jeans? There might be another chapter to point out the fact that they have no money. How do they have Titan tower? That too annoys me.
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