Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I do not own Inu-Yasha. If I did, I wouldn't be on fan fic.
Cooking Session 1 - CRAP!
Seventeen-year-old Kagome grabbed her sky blue apron and tied it around her waist. She brushed her raven black hair out of her eyes and sighed. She then recalled why she was in Home Ec cooking lessons in the first place…
flashback
Kagome had been yelling at her brother, Sota, for answering the telephone when Hojo was on the other line.
"Hello?" Sota said over the cordless, black phone.
"Oh, hi," Hojo, on the other line, responded. "Is Kagome there?"
"Oh, yeah. She's right—"
Kagome jumped out and covered Sota's mouth. She scowled at him threateningly. Sota, fortunately, got the message.
"Heh…my mistake," he cowered nervously. "She's…um…at the doctor's."
Kagome clenched her fist and kicked Sota. The last thing she wanted was for Hojo to run to the doctor's office with flowers or something.
"Oh! I must go see her!" Hojo exclaimed.
Sota pretended to be polite, while Kagome was leaning her ear towards the phone to listen. "Er…no. She has the chicken pox, so you can't. It's…highly contagious."
"Poor Kagome." Hojo sounded discouraged. "Oh, well. Call me when she's feeling better, please."
Click. Sota hung up the phone, clearly relieved that Kagome didn't pound him into the ground or something. Kagome, also relieved, sighed.
BEEP! BEEP! BEEEP!
Kagome jumped, and Sota squealed.
"The smoke detector?" Kagome cried.
Then she remembered the cake she had left in the oven. UH-OH! Crap, Kagome thought. I'm dead meat!
Hurriedly, she ran to the kitchen coughing. The smoke was thick, and it smelled…well, burned. Kagome crinkled her nose and turned off the oven. She carefully pulled open the oven's door.
A lopsided cake was what she saw. It was originally meant to be a beautiful vanilla cake, but now it was black and ashy. The cake suddenly fell apart and PLOP! splattered all over the floor. Ooze came out.
"Ew!" Sota made a face. "Vanilla cake—extra crispy!"
Kagome gave him her best shut-up-or-die look. She knew that the cake would be hard to clean up and hide from her parents. Boy, if they ever found out…
All of a sudden, the door opened and in came Kagome's mother and grandfather. Her mother screamed. Kagome gulped.
end flashback
Kagome looked around. The Home Ec room was bright and cheery. People were bustling about and bickering with their odd assortment of aprons. Some aprons were black and spiky, and others were polka-dotted in the ugliest colors. Kagome was glad that her apron looked someone normal. Plain, yes—but normal.
Everyone shut up, however, when they heard a sharp yell. All eyes locked on the Home Ec teacher and a teenage boy with silver, waist-long hair and golden cat-like eyes. And…to Kagome's surprise…he had cute little puppy dog ears poking out of his hair.
"I AM NOT WEARING THAT!" the boy argued. "THERE IS NO WAY—"
The Home Ec teacher was all ready tying a pink, laced apron around his waist, to his disgust. Kagome couldn't resist a giggle. The apron was bright pink, covered in ribbons and laces, and very funny looking on the boy. And I do mean very.
A few minutes later, the Home Ec teacher got everyone sitting in a seat quietly. Several were still snickering at the unfortunate "pink apron boy", though.
"Now," the Home Ec teacher said, "I am Ms. Katreen. Welcome to my class! Please wait patiently while I pass around your cooking space number and partner."
Ms. Katreen went around to almost everybody in the whole room before she got to Kagome. She was all ready bored. Figures.
"Your name is Kagome?" Ms. Katreen finally said. "Hm…your cooking space number is eighteen. And your cooking partner is…"
There was a pause. Kagome grew impatient.
"Who?" she snapped.
"Oh, I wish good luck to you." Ms. Katreen looked at Kagome as if she was doomed. "Your partner is…the one frowning over there in the pink apron. His name is Inu-Yasha."
Kagome's jaw dropped. She suddenly got a headache and was temped to request medicine. Why him? It wasn't fair!
"There is something that may help you with him," Ms. Katreen said with much pity. "You see this necklace?"—she held up a odd looking necklace with what looked like fangs and big beads—"Put it on his neck and then say a—"
Inu-Yasha, the "pink apron boy", suddenly walked quickly over to Ms. Katreen. Ms. Katreen handed Kagome the necklace hurriedly, and Kagome hid it in her apron pocket.
"Feh," Inu-Yasha sneered. Then he walked angrily to kitchen eighteen. Kagome could've sworn she heard him mutter, "Bitch!" under his breath.
"What was I going to say?" Ms. Katreen wondered out loud. "Hm…anyway, be careful with the necklace. And be careful with Inu-Yasha. He had to take these classes as punishment for crime."
Kagome nodded and gulped. She just knew Home Ec was bad news! It just couldn't end well!
She walked slowly and cautiously to kitchen eighteen and washed her hands, ignoring Inu-Yasha. She clutched the necklace in her left hand.
"So…" Inu-Yasha's voice trailed off. "This is the stupid recipe?"
"Gimme that!" Kagome snatched the recipe from Inu-Yasha's hand.
She skimmed the recipe quickly. Great. Strawberry smoothies. This would be a disaster, as she knew it.
"I'll get most of the ingredients out," Kagome ordered. "Inu-Yasha, you get the strawberries."
"I don't like strawberries," Inu-Yasha said stubbornly. He stuck out his tongue in protest.
Kagome glared. "Fine," she growled. "I'll get them myself."
She saw Inu-Yasha smirk, and she felt her temper rise. Kagome snatched the bowl of strawberries and grabbed a huge handful. She then thrust Inu-Yasha against the counter and shoved them in his mouth and down his throat. Inu-Yasha was shocked.
"Listen, 'pink apron boy', if you don't work with me and do as I say, I'm gonna make your life a living hell. I don't care if you have some dumb criminal record. You have to…"
Kagome's voice trailed off suddenly. She was staring thoughtfully at Inu-Yasha's cute, perky ears. She couldn't resist the urge to touch them…
Both of her hands gently ruffled his ears softly. Inu-Yasha's red, angry face immediately became calm and maybe…a little cute. Kagome stroked his ears slowly. They were so soft and warm…
It was then that Kagome realized what the heck she was doing. She jerked her hand away and blushed heavily. Inu-Yasha realized what had happened promptly and scowled.
"Hey, don't do that, you idiot!"
Kagome stuck out her tongue and turned away to look at the recipe in better detail. She saw Inu-Yasha bending down to pick up a strawberry off of the ground, and then she thought of that odd necklace Ms. Katreen had given her. She decided to take her chance.
As he was bending down, Kagome forced the necklace on his head and pushed it down to his neck. Inu-Yasha was startled.
"What the hell—"
As Inu-Yasha struggled to get it off, Kagome tried to remember what Ms. Katreen had told her to say when the necklace was put on him. She remembered that it was something like—
"Crap! I have to go to the bathroom!" she cried suddenly.
She just realized how long she had been holding her load in. She forgot about Inu-Yasha and rushed to the bathroom. Oddly enough, Inu-Yasha followed. His face looked pale and white like chalk.
They both ran into the bathroom—well, different bathrooms of course, but you know what I mean. Kagome felt relieved afterwards and heaved a sigh. She saw that Inu-Yasha still wasn't out of the bathroom. How weird, she thought. It was really strange how he just suddenly had to go to the bathroom like that.
Finally, ten whole minutes later, relieved Inu-Yasha walked out the bathroom door. He looked at Kagome briefly, and then he began shouting at her.
"What is this stupid necklace thing! Why won't it come off?" he shouted.
Kagome stuck out her tongue for the second time in this chapter. "Its so you'll behave. You act like a little child. If you aren't good, I'll—I'll—"
Kagome's voice trailed off. She still couldn't remember exactly what the necklace did. Inu-Yasha still glared at her. It'd be cute if he actually smiled, Kagome thought to herself.
"Well?" Inu-Yasha raised his eyebrow.
"Oh…phooey with it all. I don't know what it does, okay? So what. I'll figure it out eventually," Kagome admitted. Then she added in teasingly (to change the subject), "By the way, that was a nice little crap you had earlier. What were you doing that made you take so long? You know how much time we're wasti—"
But Inu-Yasha was running to the bathroom again. Huh! Kagome was bewildered. How many times does he have to go to the bathroom?
Ms. Katreen approached Kagome. She was a bit surprised, too.
"So you chose 'crap' as your word? Interesting…" she mumbled.
"Er…wha'? You mean every time I say 'crap', he'll have to go to the bathroom?"
Ms. Katreen nodded.
"Are you serious? Seriously serious? Whoa!" Kagome was joyous.
She now had a method of getting Inu-Yasha under control. She couldn't wait to "test it out" a few times. She grinned. She couldn't help but think, Maybe Home Ec won't be so bad after all.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is my second Inu-Yasha story, obviously a work-in-progress. It's turning out to bemostly humorous, but the promised romance will come later, trust me! And I'll enter Miroku, Shippo, Kikyo, Naroku, and Sango into the story! (So, didja like my "CRAP" twist to the "SIT" phrase? I sure had fun with it! Inu-Yasha will definitely need to go out and buy a portable, carry-around toilet or something now.)
NEXT CHAPTER: Blender Problems