Okay, so I was supposed to be working on my bit for the next story in my collaboration with Wind-In-The-Trees, but I hit a wall, so I decided to put this story to paper. It's been going around in my head for awhile now, and it'll likely continue on into a full story, but for the moment it will remain a one-shot. The italics are a separate conversation that Arizona has with her father prior to her conversation with Callie. If it's written like so "italics" than those are Arizona's words, if the words don't have quotes, than they're her father's words.
Oh, and if you wonder if any of this is possible… totally. My niece was born five days before my brother and sister-in-law's first anniversary, and a friend from college that is 21 – and her brothers are 25 and 26 – was just informed that her mother is pregnant.
A HALO jump is a type of Special Forces skydive insertion. It stands for High Altitude Low Open, basically they jump from a mile or so up with oxygen packs and they open their chutes at a few hundred feet to allow for greater stealth.
"Is it worth it? All of it? Any of it? Is any of it worth it?"
"Hey." Arizona turns from her seat to see Callie approach. She turns back to face the city skyline while the brunette hesitantly takes a seat beside the blonde.
Do you think that I regret the way that things turned out? Is that what you're really asking?
"Thanks for coming." Arizona's tone is soft, barely heard, but the silence surrounding them makes it easier.
"Do you?"
"I'll always come when you need me." Callie faces the same direction that Arizona is, waiting for the woman to speak. She can tell that whatever needs to be said will take some time, and she's willing to give the blonde whatever time she needs.
"My mom was 18 when my parents got married." Callie is shocked at the start. Arizona has never been one to give out details about her family, she's always stayed vague. Callie remains silent, not wanting to break whatever spell the blonde is under that is making her open up.
Life didn't turn out the way we'd planned when we started out…
"My dad had just made First Lieutenant; in his 16 years in the Marines, he'd been on four tours, lived in eight countries on three continents… he'd seen the world. The farthest my mother had ever been from the town she'd been born in was a county fair 50 miles away. She wanted to travel, see the world… see the world with him. They wanted to have a few years together – just the two of them – before they started a family. My parents' first anniversary was November 14th…"
"Your birthday is November 6th." Callie states, softly, hesitating to break the spell.
…but it never does.
"Yeah, my brother and I were eight days old when my parents' celebrated their first anniversary. Twins before they had been married for a full year. My younger brother and sister were born two years later, and my kid brother and sister three years after them.
Things didn't turn out the way that we planned, but life rarely does. You'll have to ask Kate what her feelings are-,
"The best laid plans…"
"I know exactly what she'll say. 'I have no regrets', 'My life was wonderful, I wouldn't change a thing'. I wouldn't get the truth, she'll never tell us anything that she feels would hurt us."
Arizona falls silent once again. Callie has moved marginally closer with every word spoken by the blonde. There's still some space between them, and Callie halts, waiting for the blonde to speak again; waiting for her to bring up the baby brother and sister that she knows Arizona has.
Truthfully? I had planned on having a few years of time just the two of us, she wanted to see the world and I had seen the world and wanted to make her happy.
"Once I found out that we were unexpected… once I found out what they wanted to do the first few years of their marriage… I thought they were missing out. I know what kind of marriage they had, it was the stuff dreams are made of, the kind of marriage that others hope they'll have one day.
Her happiness meant everything to me. When I fell in love with her… when I found out that she was in love with me… that sparkle that she would get in her eye, the absolute joy in her smile – much like yours – I wanted nothing more in life than to see that sparkle every day.
"I always wondered if they'd be happier if they'd had those few years to themselves before we arrived.
It became my mission to keep that sparkle on her face.
"When my kid brother and sister left home, they planned this big trip… a cruise around the world… all the crazy, adventures that they wanted to do but never got to.
When we found out that you and your brother were on the way, and later with the others, the sparkle was no less than when we'd go out, just the two of us and do something crazy.
"The first of many… they each had bucket lists, they decided to cross at least one off of each every year after that.
Yes, when your kid brother and sister left, we thought we'd get to do all the wild and crazy things that we wanted to do when we first got married, but the plans always change.
"Some were crazy things: Mom wanted to experience a HALO jump, Dad- dad wanted to make an award-winning jelly for the county fair. That was a regular something from Mom's life, like the HALO jump was a regular something from Dad's.
And we still got to do some crazy things, they just had to be on someone else's schedule, but that didn't lessen them any.
"They were six weeks from home on the cruise when Mom got sick. Dad thought it was food poisoning, since he got sick the first time also. But she kept throwing up, even when he got better. They had been in some fairly unsavory places, so they came to see me first thing when they got home to get checked out. I was 26, a third year resident at the time…
And we get to experience everything all over again.
"I was 26 years old when I got to tell my parents that they were expecting again." Callie chokes back a laugh, but allows a smile to fight through when she sees the small sardonic smile on the blonde's face.
It's the greatest adventure ever…
"By the time he'd retired, my dad had been on twelve tours, resided in nineteen countries on every continent but Antarctica; he'd travelled enough miles to circle the globe eight times, been shot seven times, buried more friends than I have patients, and been in the offices of five different therapists – and each of those experiences paled in comparison to the one's he'd have at home.
Parenthood…
"All those experiences and the greatest adventure he'd ever had was parenthood.
"I only recently found that out." Arizona turns to Callie, who can see the blue eyes she loves so much have sheen of tears covering them. She takes Callie's hand hesitantly, and reciprocates the action when Callie threads their fingers together.
"I can't help but picture a little girl with that smile of yours that I love so much, combined with that sparkle your eye gets whenever you're deliriously happy… I'll never be able to say no to her, a fact I'm certain that she'll use to her full advantage once she figures it out."
"No less than the girl I can't stop picturing with your eyes and dimples."
"I'm not totally certain that I'll be ready to have kids any time soon, but I want to be ready… one day. I love you and I want to see that sparkle in your eye every day that we're together. It's an adventure, and it's an adventure that I want to have with you. If… if I'm not too late."
"You'll never be too late… I think you're the only person I'd ever want to have that adventure with."
"Really?"
"Really?"
"Really."
Really.