Author's Note: This story is based on a wonderful drawing by pencilpushingenthusiast aka CBM, which you can find on my Tumblr blog. I wrote this for my friend VoyageAsia, who recently celebrated her birthday. Here's a late present for you, sweetie. Enjoy!

Brother Love (aka Five Times Cooper Resented Blaine and One Time Blaine Resented Cooper)

by lilyvandersteen

Radio Blaine

"Look, Cooper, Blaine's smiling at you. Go on, give him a smile back."

Cooper, who'd just told his mom all about his new teacher, and how he was ecstatic that it was a MAN this year, and about the cool experiment they had done with marbles, glared at her. "Have you even heard ONE WORD of what I just said?"

Pam looked at her eldest son, quirking an eyebrow. "Of course I have! You have a new teacher, and it's a man, and he's really cool."

"Nice save, Mom. Next time, maybe try and show some enthusiasm as well when I'm talking to you, instead of being tuned to Radio Blaine 24/7, okay?"

"Don't you sass me, young man," Pam warned him.

"Don't you ignore me, then," Cooper retorted. "I'm your son too. Which you seem to have forgotten when you got this little brat. All of a sudden it's 'Blaine this' and 'Blaine that', and I've become invisible. Well, I don't care about Blaine smiling, or blowing bubbles, or doing whatever else you think is cute. He's just a dumb baby, who screams and poops and drools. Not. Interested. I want my mom back, instead of this pod person you've turned into. You never have time for me anymore. You don't listen to me anymore. You never cuddle or kiss or hug me anymore. It's always Blaine, Blaine, Blaine, and I'm SICK of it! Remember me, Mom? Remember me? I was here FIRST!"

Pam sighed. "Sheila warned me that you would be jealous. Only, I thought you'd be old enough to know better."

Cooper stomped his foot. "So I'm supposed to be okay with you pretending no-one else but Blaine exists? You thought, 'Oh, Cooper is ten, he doesn't need a mom anymore'? Well, guess what, Mom, I still need you. And I'm pretty sure I'll need you even when I'm all grown up. You can't just stop being my mom. You're supposed to stay my mom forever."

Pam's eyes softened, and she put Blaine in his bassinet and threw her arms around Cooper. "Aww, cookie bear, I'll always be your mom. And I'm sorry you haven't gotten enough cuddles lately. It's just… A baby takes up so much time."

Cooper nodded sagely. "Well, next time, remember to use protection."

Pam snorted and then shook with laughter, and she hugged Cooper a bit closer still and kissed him on the cheek. "Yes, honey, next time, we'll remember."

"And you won't forget about my birthday, will you? It's my birthday in two weeks, and you haven't even planned a party yet!"

Pam looked stricken. "You're right. Where's my phone?"

Babysitting

As Blaine grew from a baby into a toddler, he started taking up a little less of Pam's time. The upside to that was that Pam went back to cooking and baking like before, so that Cooper came home to his mom singing in the kitchen and the house smelling of cookies or lasagne. The downside was that Pam expected Cooper to start looking after Blaine, too.

"Cookie bear, I need to go to the store real quick because we're out of milk. Look after your brother, will you? He's in the living room."

Cooper, who'd been playing video games in his room, looked up at his mom, aghast.

"Oh, don't look like that, you'll be fine. Just make sure he doesn't fall. He likes to climb everything he sees."

So Cooper, with a put-upon sigh, made his way to the living room, where Blaine was indeed climbing the dresser, which was teetering already.

Cooper plucked Blaine off the dresser. "No, no, no. This is not safe to climb, okay? It will fall on you, and that will hurt, and you'll cry."

Blaine's face lit up when he saw his brother. "Coopie! Play with me?"

Blaine hugged Cooper's right leg with both arms and put his feet on his brother's, looking up at him expectantly.

Cooper, who'd been disgruntled at being recruited as a babysitter, and determined to ignore Blaine unless he was in danger, melted under the onslaught of Blaine's puppy dog eyes and grinned. "Looks like a little monkey's grabbed my leg. Now how will I get it off? Oh, I know. Tickle attack!"

And he tickled Blaine until the little boy let go in a fit of giggles.

When Pam came home, all out of breath from hurrying to the store and then all the way back, she peeked into the living room with trepidation. Was Cooper looking after his brother? Was Blaine okay?

With one look, her worried expression dissolved into a smile. She snapped a quick picture with her phone and she tiptoed to the kitchen to put away the groceries and start making Cooper's favourite cookies. Her eldest son more than deserved that reward. He was playing with Blaine, showing him how to make a somersault by holding on to Cooper with both hands and walking all the way up Cooper's legs and his belly until he could turn over backwards. Blaine did so again and again, giggling excitedly, and Cooper never even flinched.

Pam, now cracking eggs, smiled to herself, remembering both boys' faces scrunched up in concentration. They had never looked more like brothers than in that moment.

Attention-Stealing Brat

Blaine grew up into an adorable kid, and more and more often, Cooper, who'd been the star of all family reunions until his little brother came along, was relegated to the side-lines at birthday bashes and Christmas celebrations, everyone cooing over Blaine saying or doing the cutest thing, and paying Cooper no attention whatsoever.

It wasn't in Cooper's nature to back down without a fight, though, and he plotted to get the focus back on himself, which led to him performing a song with a dance routine he'd learnt in glee club, and even playing the piano like that cute Nate from the school band had taught him.

His eyes shone when everyone applauded and complimented him.

Blaine clapped the loudest, looking up at his big brother adoringly. "I want to dance like that. Teach me, please?"

Cooper, glowing with that praise, patiently taught Blaine the steps to the dance, and it wasn't until family members started encouraging Blaine and telling him he was doing so well that Cooper realised he'd been played by the little brat, who had everyone eating out of his hand again and ignoring his big brother.

In his bitter resentment, Cooper turned vicious, criticising Blaine's dance moves until the boy's happy expression melted away and left only tears and hurt.

Then, Cooper fled. He knew his mother would be very angry with him and would give him a firm talking-to when all the guests were gone. But he didn't care. He didn't. Blaine had deserved that. Every word of it. Sneaky attention-stealing brat! Why did he ever have to be born? Why did he have to take everything away from Cooper? It wasn't fair. It wasn't FAIR!

Cooper slammed his bedroom door as hard as he could. That made him feel slightly better, though it still didn't stop him from flopping onto his bed face first and crying until he fell asleep.

That's how Pam found him after her sister and nieces and in-laws were gone. She was disappointed in him, yes, and she'd planned on telling him so, and demanding him to stop being so hard on his brother, but one look at the tear tracks on his face made her anger melt away.

She'd been in the kitchen when the dance incident happened, and when she came back into the living room, she'd had to comfort a sobbing little boy who wanted to know why nothing he ever did was good enough for Cooper. "Why… *sniff* does he… *wet hiccup* hate me so? *sniff* He's… *gulp* my brother. He's *shuddery breath* s'pposed to… *sniff* LOVE me!"

Pam didn't know what to tell Blaine. Why did Cooper resent his little brother so? Why did he turn everything into a competition? Surely, there was enough love to go around for the both of them?

She sighed and gently brushed his bangs out of his eyes. Then, with another sigh and a kiss on his cheek, she carefully tugged his comforter out from under him and covered him up to his neck. He wiggled into the warmth and the frown on his forehead smoothed out slightly.

Pam smiled and resolved to talk to Cooper tomorrow, and to try and keep an open mind and listen to him before she spoke. The last thing she wanted was to make him resent Blaine even more.

I Wanna Play Too

In his junior year, Cooper became soccer captain. His dad clapped him on the back proudly when he heard the news, and bought him new cleats.

"You'll come to the matches, won't you?" Cooper asked over dinner.

"Sure, bud," his father promised, but his mother frowned and worried her lip.

"Mo-om! Whatever plans you have with Sheila, you can always do that on Saturday instead. I need you to cheer me on!"

"Oh, no, sweetie, it's not that. It's just… I need to find a sitter for Blaine, and on Friday night, that's not going to be easy."

"But you'll try, Mom, won't you?" Cooper insisted.

Pam nodded. "I'll try."

Friday dawned, and Cooper bounced down the stairs, all hyper and happy at the thought of his first match as a captain. When he came into the kitchen and smelled chocolate chip pancakes, he beamed and went to give his mom a kiss on the cheek. She handed him a plate with pancakes, but her smile seemed off, somehow. What could be the matter? Oh…

"You couldn't find a sitter, huh?" Cooper asked.

Pam shook her head. "I'm so sorry, cookie bear."

"Well, why don't you bring Blaine along? He's nearly six. He's not a baby anymore."

"It's past his bedtime!"

Cooper rolled his eyes. "Yeah… Tell me again who was wide awake at three in the morning yesterday? I don't think one night of staying up late is going to kill him."

Pam sighed. "I'll think about it, okay?"

That evening, when Cooper ran onto the field to loud cheering, he scanned the crowd for familiar faces. He saw his dad, and his mom next to him, barely holding on to a squirming Blaine, who seemed intent on joining his big brother on the field.

Oops, sorry, Mom!

Cooper took up his position in the goal, his eyes scanning everything happening in front of them and his body moving instinctively to block the ball whenever it came his way.

A little before the halftime break, a burly guy from the opposing team was making his way to the goal, and Cooper tensed up, all ready to jump and catch the ball, when he heard laughter from the stands.

I mustn't look. I'll let the ball in if I do.

So Cooper focussed on the guy dribbling the ball and tried to guess which way he'd shoot, anxious not to let the ball slip through. But he needn't have worried, because his opponent's face suddenly went slack-jawed, and he fumbled his shot.

Cooper easily caught the ball and shot it all the way to the other side of the field.

The laughter in the stands continued and grew louder, and now Cooper heard his mother, too. "Blaine, come BACK!"

Uh-oh, what now?

"Uhm, is that your kid, man?" the burly guy asked, pointing behind Cooper. "It's kind of dangerous for him to come so close, you know."

Cooper looked behind him, and saw Blaine climbing the net of the goal. His heart in his throat, he gestured to the referee, who nodded and blew his whistle to hold up play.

Then, Cooper hunkered down to look Blaine straight in the eye. "Hey there, squirt."

"Coopie! Look how high I can climb!"

Cooper nodded. "Very high. I'm impressed. But I'm going to pluck you off the net and bring you back to Mom now, okay? I can't play soccer while you're climbing the net, squirt. It's not safe."

Blaine pouted at his big brother, but didn't kick up a fuss when Cooper took him off the net and carried him back to the stands. When he passed the cheerleaders, they all cooed, even Aaron, Peter and Charlie, and Cooper only just managed not to roll his eyes at how Blaine had everyone wrapped around his little finger again. Still, that was Cooper the cheerleaders were making googly eyes at, so maybe he could work this to his advantage.

Cooper gently deposited Blaine on their mother's lap, told him not to venture onto the field again and jogged back to his place in the goal.

The rest of the game passed without incidents, and Cooper's team won. The crowd went wild, and the cheerleaders did a victory dance, quite a few of them trying to catch Cooper's eye.

Cooper grinned and clapped his teammates on the back. "Good work, guys!"

After showering, he hurried to his parents. Pam was holding Blaine, who by now was sleeping soundly.

"Let me," Cooper offered, and he took his little brother to carry him to the car.

While he was strapping Blaine into his car seat, the boy opened one eye drowsily, yawned and said, "Coopie?"

"Yes?"

"I wanna… *yawn* wanna play soccer too."

"Okay…"

"Teach me?"

Cooper grinned. "Okay."

Blaine beamed at him, closed his eyes again and was out like a light.

C&B

The next week, there was no match, so Friday night was just a regular practice session. Halfway through, though, the soccer coach called to Cooper, "Hey, that kid of yours is climbing the net again. Tell him to knock that off!"

Cooper turned around, and yes, Blaine was grinning at him from his position on top of the net. Pam was hurrying towards them, wringing her hands.

"Sorry, sorry! I was just answering a text and when I looked up, he'd run off again."

"What are you doing here anyway?" Cooper asked. "There's no match this week."

"Blaine wanted to come and watch. He said you'd promised to teach him how to play?"

"Well, yes, but not halfway through soccer practice!" Cooper snapped. Behind him, he heard sniggering. He balled up his fists and gritted his teeth.

Why does that brat keep embarrassing me in front of my team?

Blaine's lip trembled and protruded, and Cooper could tell he was seconds away from bawling his eyes out or having a temper tantrum. Maybe even both. He didn't want that to happen, so he hunkered down in front of Blaine and bartered with him. "Tell you what, squirt, if you let us finish our practice without bugging us, I'll teach you to dribble afterwards. How's that?"

Blaine's face lit up instantly, and he nodded and ran to the stands. Pam followed, throwing an apologetic look at Cooper over her shoulder.

"Sorry, Coach," said Cooper. "My brother's going to stay on the stands now."

Coach Williams chuckled. "Wants to learn to play too, huh? Clever kid. You can't start early enough with soccer."

After practice, Cooper taught Blaine how to dribble. A few of his teammates hung back and cheered Blaine on. Even the coach made sure to tell the little boy that he was a natural. "Good to see that the next Anderson generation is gonna be just as great as this one."

Coach Williams clapped Cooper on the back and winked at him. "Keep up the training, both of you."

Cooper grinned at Blaine, who beamed back. "Want to see something neat?"

And Cooper started juggling the ball, on his feet, on his knees and on his head. Blaine looked on with wide eyes, and then shouted, "Teach me! Teach me!"

Cooper laughed. "Start with the basics, squirt, okay? But yes, when you get round to this, I'll teach you."

C&B

Blaine kept coming to both Cooper's matches and practice sessions, and neither threats nor promises could keep him from climbing the net of Cooper's goal every single time.

It became second nature for Cooper to gesture to the referee as soon as he heard giggles or panting behind him, and to then grab his little brother, throw him over his shoulder and bring him back to his mother in the stands.

By now, not even the opposing team quirked their eyebrows when they noticed the tiny boy on the field. They had heard all about the team's unofficial mascot, and grinned widely at sight of him.

The team had all but adopted Blaine, ruffling his curls when they passed him, helping Cooper out with Blaine's soccer training and slipping him cookies and sweets on the sly.

The cheerleaders, too, had a soft spot for Blaine, who hung around them as often as around the soccer players, and asked them no end of questions about the routines they performed. First and foremost, of course, was the question, "Teach me?", and they were only too happy to, coaching him patiently and praising him no end when he'd mastered a new move.

Early December, Cooper had found Aaron and Sophie talking to his mother after the game, asking her if she'd consent to Blaine being featured in the cheerleader's half-time performance for the next game.

Blaine had unleashed the full power of his puppy dog eyes on Pam, who'd been powerless against them, so the next cheerleader pyramid had featured a beaming curly-headed urchin on top, waving a tiny flag and – surprise, surprise! – completely stealing the show.

Yes, Cooper's little brother had successfully invaded yet another part of his life and usurped all the attention that was Cooper's due. Now, it didn't matter if he managed to stop a dozen goals in one match. All anyone could talk about was how cute his little brother was, and how talented and driven and yet so sweet…

It infuriated Cooper, but he made sure not to let it show. As long as he could keep up the loving big brother act, his dating stock was sky-high, and both boys and girls swooned around him. If tolerating Blaine and teaching him to play soccer gave Cooper his pick from the hottest juniors and seniors in school, he considered that worth it.

A bonus was that it scored him major points with his parents, who praised his maturity and finally bought him the car he'd been wanting for ages. They prolonged his curfew as well, and when prom came around, his father slipped him a pack of condoms with a wink and a "Be safe!"

Yes, Cooper guessed he owed his brother one, but that only made it rankle even more.

He had to admit that Blaine could be fun to be around, though. When he managed not to think about the little brat getting all the attention, he quite enjoyed playing with Blaine, who was eager to learn and to please, and never failed to look up at Cooper in awe and adoration.

He was loyal to a fault, too, defending his big brother when someone talked smack about Cooper, and brilliant at defusing the tension when Cooper got into trouble.

When Cooper had, one day, sent an 'I love you xoxo' text to the wrong number, both girls got into a huge fight and then started yelling at him about it. And all that just because Magali's number was right above Mandy's in Cooper's list of contacts, and he'd tapped on her name instead of his girlfriend's.

Luckily, it happened on Friday night, and Blaine was right there, as usual, looking wide-eyed at the spectacle and at Cooper's horrified and non-plussed face. And then he swooped in to the rescue, tugging at Magali's sleeve.

"I'm just saying you could have the decency of breaking up with her FIRST before… Huh? Blaine? What is it, sweetie?"

Blaine looked up at her with his most angelic expression. "I sent you that text."

"Huh?"

Mandy had noticed Blaine too, by now, and stopped yelling at Cooper to listen to the little boy.

"I borrowed Cooper's phone to send you a text," Blaine repeated. "I know my letters now, and I wanted to try. I didn't mean to make anyone angry."

Blaine's lip trembled, and he swallowed before continuing. "And I do love you, Magali."

He looked up at her, doe-eyed, and both girls melted and cooed, "Awww…"

Magali swept Blaine up into her arms and kissed him on the cheek. "I love you too, sweetie."

"We need to get you your own phone, squirt," Cooper laughed, "or you'll lose me my girlfriend and I won't be happy."

Mandy bit her lip. "I'm sorry, honey. I shouldn't have blown up at you like that."

"No worries, babe. There's no way you could have known. Squirt, next time you want to text a girl you love her, put your name at the end of the text, okay? Or use Mom's phone, or ask her to get you one of your own."

Pam chose that exact moment to join them, and laughed when she heard Blaine's explanation. "Okay, honey bee, I'll discuss it with your dad. You're young to be having a phone, but we can't have you using Cooper's and making everyone angry with him."

Blaine ended up getting his phone, and Cooper taught his brother how to use it, and took him the cinema that weekend to see the latest Disney film as a thank you for getting him out of this scrape.

Pam raised an eyebrow when she heard about the boys' Saturday afternoon plans, but wisely refrained from commenting. Her sons were finally learning to get along, and she'd have the afternoon free. Who cared if Blaine came home that night on a sugar high?

That Sunday, Cooper was on a date with Mandy when his phone chimed. He checked his messages and chuckled.

"What is it, honey?" Mandy asked.

He showed her the text he'd just received, and she giggled and cooed.

Cooper kissed her, and then looked at his phone again before turning it off, a soft smile playing about his lips. The text said, "I love you xoxo blaine"

Gay-Bashed

After high school, Cooper went to Carnegie Mellon University, when he'd been accepted with a scholarship, and thrived from Day One. He graduated with honours, and moved to LA to make it in the show business.

Finding work as an actor proved harder than he'd thought, and he found himself waiting tables and applying for modelling jobs and TV ads to make the rent.

And then he finally got his big break: a recurring role in a TV series. At last, people started recognising him on the street, and asking selfies and photographs. He developed quite the fan base, and they seemed to ship him with everyone under the sun. He often checked out the fanfiction about him, and though some of it scarred him forever, there was good stuff there, too.

After two years on the show, Cooper got nominated for an Emmy, and since he was single, he decided to invite his mother to go to the ceremony with him. He called her, but she seemed really distracted, and only hummed as he told her about his nomination.

"Mom, this is HUGE! Would it kill you to show some enthusiasm?"

He heard static rustling on his phone – Pam was sighing. "I'm sorry, cookie bear, it's just… Blaine…"

"Blaine? BLAINE?! This is the highlight of my career so far and as usual you're not interested because Blaine – what? Won the local science fair? Scored the lead in the school musical?" Cooper sneered.

"No." Pam's voice sounded ice-cold now. "Because your little brother just got gay-bashed at a school dance and is in hospital. In a coma. And they're not sure he's ever going to wake up. Congratulations on your nomination. You'll have to find someone else to go to the ceremony with you. I might be busy with funeral arrangements."

Cooper was stunned into silence, and before he knew it, Pam had hung up on him. His head whirling, he grabbed his laptop to book a plane ticket. He needed to get to Ohio, stat!

C&B

Later that day, Pam was sitting in yet another waiting room, as surgeons operated on Blaine. She wrung her hands and rummaged through her handbag for a tissue to mop up a fresh bout of tears, but she seemed to have used up all her supplies already.

"Here."

A hand held out a handkerchief to her. She took it gratefully and then looked up. "Cooper!"

"Yes, it's me. How's Blaine doing?"

Pam burst into tears again, and Cooper hugged her while she sobbed, gently rubbing circles on her back.

"He's… He's being… operated on… His skull…"

Pam got no further without choking and dissolving into tears once more.

Cooper sat down next to her, holding her hand.

"So Blaine is gay?" he asked conversationally.

"Yes," Pam said. "He told us earlier this year. We never thought his classmates would react this way."

"I'm surprised too. No-one ever said or did anything to me, and they all knew I swung both ways."

Pam nodded. "We're looking into of enrolling him at Dalton Academy, but he only qualifies for a partial scholarship, and Dalton is expensive."

"Don't worry about it. Have them send his school bills to me. I've got plenty of money and nothing to do with it."

Pam chuckled wetly. "You could always buy a house. And a car."

"Already got both," Cooper winked. "And money to spare."

"Richie Rich!"

"Hey, I'm way more handsome than that kid!"

"True."

Pam laid her head on Cooper's shoulder. "I'm glad you came."

"Of course. He's my brother. He's a pain in the neck most of the time, but I love him. And I want him happy and healthy and safe."

"Me too. I so hope he's going to be okay."

"He's tough, Mom. Remember when he fell off the kitchen counter that one time and had a concussion? The doctor said it would take three days until Blaine could leave his bed. But the next day, he was jumping all over the sofa already. He bounces back so fast. You'll see."

It took three and a half more hours before they got any news, and the only thing the doctors would say was that Blaine was 'stable'.

The next days passed in an exhausted blur, no-one of the family ever getting a decent night's sleep or a full meal, and their backs protesting that they'd spent more than enough time in uncomfortable plastic chairs.

But Blaine woke up, and the delight on his face when he saw that Cooper had come all the way from LA to see him was worth every minute of waiting.

Cooper felt a bit guilty that it had been so long since he'd last visited, and resolved to come to Ohio more often from now on.

"Tell him your news, cookie bear," Pam nudged him, so Cooper told Blaine about his Emmy nomination, and Blaine's eyes shone with pride.

"Come with me to the ceremony?" Cooper asked.

Blaine huffed out a laugh. "My leg is broken, Coop!"

"So use crutches. I want to show people that I'm proud to have you as a brother. That it makes no difference to me whom you love."

Blaine swallowed and nodded. "Okay."

B&C

At the award ceremony, Cooper surprised everyone by not bringing a beautiful woman as his date, but his little brother. And when he won the Emmy in his category, he gave a heart-stirring speech about Blaine.

"When I called my mom to tell her I'd been nominated for this award…" Cooper held it aloft and the crowd cheered, "… she had terrible news for me that totally overshadowed this honour. My brother Blaine had just been beaten up by a couple of his classmates for going to a school dance with a boy. Beaten up so badly that he ended up in a coma. And for what? For being different. It's insane.

So I came home, and saw him lying there in the hospital, bruised and broken, and I just did not understand how someone could do this to Blaine. You see, everyone who knows him loves him. I can't tell you how many times that made me jealous as a kid. Blaine has always had the talent of charming whomever he met in the blink of an eye. He's sweet and bright and talented, and goes out of his way to help people, and I don't think I've ever heard a bad word about him from anyone. So to have his classmates turn on him for being gay, that shook me to the core.

Those were his teammates on the soccer team. He's won them every match so far, and they voted him captain and looked up to him and listened to him. Why would all of that change because of whom he loves?

We need to stop teaching our children that there is only one right way to live. That's a lie, and a dangerous one at that. Everyone's different. That's what makes the world so wonderful and interesting. And we should celebrate that diversity, and not stifle it. You wouldn't force a vegetarian to eat meat or tell a Red Sox fan that they're only allowed to cheer on the Texas Rangers from now on. So stop telling children that there can only be love between a man and a woman and that everything else is an abomination. It's not. Love is love, and it is beautiful and precious whatever form it takes.

My best friend Jim is married to a woman, and that's okay. His sister is also married to a woman, and that's okay. I have had relationships with both men and women, and that's okay. My brother likes boys, and that's okay. Everyone deserves to love whomever they want. Without being censured or bullied for it. If you see two men or women kissing and it makes you want to hit them, YOU are the abomination. Not them.

So broaden your mind and that of your children. Be tolerant and be kind. Like my little brother."

It was silent for a beat after his speech, but when the applause started, it was deafening. Cooper looked at Blaine, who was beaming through the tears streaming down his face, and leapt off the dais to go hug his brother.

"Congratulations," said Blaine when Cooper let go.

"Good speech?" Cooper asked.

"The best!"

+ 1. Big Brother

Blaine hadn't seen his big brother in a few years, and he was okay with that, thank you very much. He did not need Cooper to come swooping in and sweeping HIS boyfriend – yes, Coop, Kurt is MY boyfriend, so BACK OFF! – off his feet.

Blaine gritted his teeth while Kurt fanboyed over Cooper. Of course he'd had the stupid jingle from Cooper's commercial as his ringtone. Of course. Wasn't that just great?

And of course Kurt thought Cooper was the most handsome man in all of North America. Of course.

Never mind that your boyfriend is standing right next to you and having to listen to your gushing. What am I? Dog food?

As if that wasn't enough, Coach Sylvester brought Cooper to the Glee club, where everyone swooned at his feet yet again.

When Cooper suggested that they sing a duet together, Blaine perked up a little and gave the performance his all, but of course, Cooper accepted all the applause as his due and had only criticism for Blaine. Of course.

They went out to lunch together, and Blaine asked his brother why he was always so hard on him, but Cooper just brushed it off with a laugh, and Blaine went back to stabbing his salad to death.

Coop taught an acting masterclass at McKinley the next day. What a joke! The advice he gave was terrible, yet everyone seemed to hang on his lips and accept his every word as gospel. Only Blaine was sceptic and not afraid to show it, but Cooper flat-out ignored him and carried on. Of course.

Two can play that game…

Only, Kurt wouldn't quite let Blaine ignore his brother, urging him to talk to Coop. Blaine promised to try, but before he knew it, he was singing out all the resentment he felt, and to his surprise, Cooper joined in.

It seemed to have been the right tactic get Cooper to talk, though. His big brother opened up to him, admitting that he'd come back to Ohio to lick his wounds after missing out on an audition he really wanted, and that the ego boost McKinley had provided him did a world of good. He also confessed that he'd never quite gotten over their sibling rivalry, and that was why he felt so threatened by Blaine's talent and kept criticising him.

Blaine, who'd bitten back harsh words so often that week any time Kurt sang Cooper's praises, could relate to that, and softened enough to offer help making an audition tape to send to the director, in the hope that Cooper would be considered for a role after all.

Afterwards, they lay on the sofa together talking and laughing. Cooper knew a lot of the big names in LA now, and Blaine wanted to hear all the gossip about them.

Somehow, that led to Cooper confessing that he felt lonely in LA. "There are no real friends there, squirt. Or at least not for me. Everyone I meet wants something from me. It feels so good to be back in Ohio and catch up with some old friends, who don't expect anything more from me than buying them a drink when they've bought me one in the previous round."

"And your love life? Don't you have anyone special?"

Cooper scoffed. "Nah. Oh, there are plenty of girls and guys that want all up on this," he pointed to his body and took on a bodybuilder pose to make Blaine laugh, "but they don't want more than a bootie call. Thing is, I would have LOVED that as a teenager. Loads of sex without strings. But now… I don't know. I come home to that big house I've bought, and when I drop my keys in the bowl on the dresser, the sound echoes. I take my shoes of and drop them on the mat, and it echoes. That's how hollow life is in LA. My house is beautiful and has tons of stuff I don't even need, but all the same, it feels empty. Because I have no-one to share it with. I'm not saying I'm ready for a spouse and two and a half kids, but I… I just want someone to say hi to late at night. Someone who'll still be there in the morning. Someone I can be myself with. No need to fake perfection every single minute of every single day. 'Cause that's exhausting."

Blaine swallowed, and tentatively reached out to hug Cooper, who eagerly returned the hug.

"And then I see you and Kurt, and you're so young, but you're so sure of each other, and I really envy that. How can you just know he's the one?"

Blaine threw his head back and smiled at the ceiling. "We just… I can't explain it, but we just clicked from the moment we met. And at first, I thought it was just friendship, you know? He became my best friend, and we could talk for hours, about all sorts of things. And he made me laugh, and he supported me even when I was being an idiot, but he wasn't afraid to call me out on my stupidity. And I got to know him more and more, and Coop, he's just so AMAZING! So brave. He gets bullied and laughed at and discriminated against, every single day, and he just powers through it with his head held high, and never even becomes bitter. He has it so much worse than the others in the Glee club, and his friends really don't get it and don't help him the way they should. But does he let that get to him? No. He's fiercely supportive of them, and he loves them with all his heart, even if they don't deserve it sometimes. And yes, that includes me. Did you know, he told me he was in love with me, and I turned him down because I didn't want to ruin our friendship? He could have completely shut me out after that, but he didn't. He stayed the amazing friend he always was. And when I finally figured out I was in love with him, he didn't tell me I'd missed my chance. He'd just patiently waited for me all that time. And that's when I knew he was the one. I really don't deserve him, but I'm so glad he chose me to share his life with."

"Wow. I want someone like that too."

Blaine stuck his tongue out at Cooper. "There's only one Kurt, and he's mine."

Cooper laughed. "Fair enough. Come visit me this summer?"

"Can I bring Kurt?"

"Sure. I love being called the most handsome man in North America."

Blaine punched Cooper in the shoulder, pouting.

Cooper wiggled his eyebrows at him and burst out laughing, so infectiously that Blaine couldn't help but join in.

That's how Pam found them when she came home from work, and she smiled.

"Lasagne for dinner, boys?"