"Quinn, please. Please come home. I'm sorry. I want-." Rachel stumbled over her words, her voice unsteady with emotion and multiple glasses of wine. "I need you here. Please, at least talk to me. I love you."
She hung up and dropped the phone onto the bed beside her, then sighed and fell back onto her pillow. That was the fifth message she had left since her girlfriend had grabbed her emergency bag – which was always packed since her parents had kicked her out – and left. The fight had been epic; the worst of their relationship, and Rachel had said several things she immediately regretted.
She knew Quinn would need space after such an intense argument, and had managed to wait almost thirty minutes before the first call. But three hours and half a bottle of wine had passed since then, and she was growing more desperate to see Quinn, or to hear her voice, or just receive some sign that she was safe and that their relationship was not over.
The thought of Quinn leaving her sent Rachel into another round of sobbing, but when she recovered a plan was beginning to form.
She had to find Quinn.
She wouldn't try sleeping in her car again, not after what happened last time. She was proud and stubborn, but not stupid. Finn was out, obviously, and Noah would be a last resort. Mike was visiting family in California and Kurt lived in same house as Finn, which left her three choices.
She decided to try Santana first, as she lived closest to Rachel. After several rings a voice that was definitely not Santana answered.
"Hel—mmhm." There was a muffled thump before Santana spoke.
"Not now, Rachel." The line immediately went dead.
Well, that ruled out two of her suspects, leaving only Mercedes.
Before she could really think about what she was doing, Rachel had thrown on a hoodie and was out her door. She was tipsy and desperate to see Quinn, but she was still sensible enough to not drive.
If Rachel had taken note of the short time it had taken her to reach the Jones residence, she would have been impressed with herself, but her mind was focused solely on Quinn. Quinn was in the house. She just had to knock on the door and she could see Quinn.
Rachel waited a moment for something to happen, then realized that her arms were still hanging at her sides and she hadn't actually knocked on the door. She raised her hand to correct that oversight, but paused with her fist hovering in front of the door.
What if Quinn didn't forgive her? What if she didn't want her back? Rachel's heart beat faster. She couldn't take this, she needed—the door opened.
Quinn was standing in front of her, and she looked a bit surprised. Her eyes were red from crying, and her hair looked like she had just woken up.
"Rach come in, quick! You're soaked!" She looked down at herself. Something on the periphery of her mind had told her it was pouring rain, but she hadn't realised she was drenched until Quinn pointed it out. She stepped inside and peeled the wet hood off of her head. "Have you been drinking?" Quinn's nose scrunched up adorably when she asked the question.
"No. Well yes but, I... I really need to talk to you. Apolg—a-pol-o-gize to you. I'm sorry I said those nasty things. I didn't mean them, not at all. I admire you for being strong and sticking to your beliefs, even if I don't really agree with them. You're a very caring person, and I think you would make an excellent mother, if you decide to keep her, and that is entirely your choice to make. And I know you probably don't want to see me now, or ever, but I need you to know that I love you, and that I'll do whatever you need me to do for you and the baby." Rachel stopped to take a breath, and noticed the fond smile that had settled on Quinn's face during her rant.
"Relax, Rachel. Breathe." She felt an arm wrap around her waist, and let Quinn guide her into the living room and remove her shoes and sweater before sitting her down on the couch and covering her with a blanket. "I'll be right back." Rachel heard hushed voices coming from the kitchen, then Quinn reappeared in front of her and pressed a steaming mug of tea into her hands. She sat down in a chair across from Rachel and waited a minute.
"So, you wanted to talk to me?" She opened tentatively.
Rachel nodded.
"I'm sorry, Quinn. I'm so sorry for all the things I said. I just—I love you so much, and I want everything to be perfect for you. I want you to be able to have fun and be a teenager and go to college and live your dreams." Rachel was beginning to tear up.
"But what about what you just said to me? That you thought I could do all that and keep her?" Quinn seemed to be unsure of herself.
"I still think you can do it. But it would be so hard. Even if I was there with you it wouldn't be easy." Rachel was sobbing, and Quinn leaned in to wipe the tears away. She was silent for a long time.
"I know." She spoke softly, and a small smile formed on her lips. "I've been thinking about it a lot. I don't know what I'm going to do yet. But I do know that I want you with me to face whatever happens." She kissed Rachel softly on the lips, and Rachel stared back at her with wide eyes. "I forgive you, Rach." She spoke barely above a whisper. Rachel shook her head, but Quinn continued. "I want us to make this decision together. If we keep her, she will be our daughter."
Quinn found herself being pulled out of her chair completely and into a tight hug. Eventually, Rachel released her and the shared a long, slow kiss.
"Quinn..." They both had tears in their eyes, but they were also smiling.
"I know. I love you too."
AN: Title is from the Death Cab for Cutie song Lack of Color.