URGENT NOTE: As you may know, the BBC starts shooting the 50th anniversary special this week. If you'd like to see a proper tribute to Sarah Jane in the special, please consider signing the petition at www dot ipetitions dot com / petition/sarah-jane-smith-dr-who-tribute (automatic link removed because we don't want to break any rules) and passing it on to any groups you belong to. If we all pass it on, we can make a difference! Time (ironically) is of the essence! Thanks!

Don't want spoilers? Start with "Unfinished Business" and work your way through "Family of Choice", "A Lot to Give Thanks For", and "Safety In Numbers" before you read this.

We'll wait.

On the other hand, if you don't mind spoilers, let us bring you up to date. For those who may have just joined us, in "Unfinished Business", Sarah Jane became a Time Lady (you'll just have to go back and read it to find out how) and after "Family of Choice" (where they get married), "A Lot To Give Thanks For" (where their first child is born) and "Safety In Numbers" (in which we have an adventure with their six Time Lord children), Sarah's pregnant with twins and just about ready to give birth. We pick up in the house the TARDIS built for them in the "Gallifrey room", a huge area meant to look like the Doctor's lost planet.

Enjoy.

"Mummy, mummy," cried Davy. "Come quick, an angel just flew into the garden."

Sarah Jane looked up as her youngest son ran into the kitchen. If he were any other child, she'd dismiss what he was shouting immediately. Because they were a family of Time Lords living in space however, she couldn't ignore him. "What do you mean an angel? What does this angel look like?"

"She's beautiful and tall. She has long curly dark hair and a white angel dress with feathers."

Sarah Jane slowly walked over to her son and took his small hand in hers. She was seventeen months pregnant with twins and moving these days was not easy for her. She looked and felt as if she were ready to explode. "Can you show me this angel of yours very quietly, Davy? So quiet that she won't be able to see or hear us? We don't want to frighten her away do we?" She would call the Doctor if the angel were real, but six-year-old Davy was well known for his active imagination.

"No, mummy, we don't." Davy smiled and led her quietly to the back yard of their Gallifreyan like home. As mother and son headed out the door, Sarah saw a woman in white bending over examining a row of blue shadow flowers. "Mummy sees the angel now, Davy," She whispered. "Could you please go inside and get daddy for me? Tell him that there's an intruder and I need him to come here. Can you do that for me please? I'll be waiting right here. "

Davy nodded and waved his cape without shouting as he "flew" back into the house.

Sarah watched the woman carefully. No use being alarmed just yet. She wasn't doing anything but smelling the flowers in her garden.

The woman stood up suddenly and spotted Sarah Jane watching her. A confused look came over her face. "Identify yourself and your house please," she said in a haughty manor.

The woman was gorgeous, but she was extremely rude, and Sarah Jane bristled at her attitude. She decided to brave this out until the Doctor showed up. After all, it wouldn't help matters if she appeared to be afraid. "I'm Sarah Jane Smith," she said standing up as tall as she could manage. "This is my home, mine and my husband's. May I ask who you are?"

"Though I sense that you are a Time Lord, I do not recognize you," she said as she began to scrutinize Sarah more closely. "Are you ill? What has happened to your body?" she asked, looking at Sarah's swollen belly. "I've never seen one of our kind afflicted the way you are."

"I'm having a baby. Two actually, we're expecting twins. And you're right, my husband and I are both Time Lords. However, you still haven't told me who you are."

"Romana!" the Doctor said, sliding to a stop. "What are you doing here?"

"I might ask the same question of you, Doctor. I came here to bring you back to Gallifrey with me, but it seems," she eyed Sarah Jane coldly. "That you're in much worse trouble than I thought."

"Trouble..." the Doctor repeated. This was Romana's third incarnation, after she travelled with him, but pre-dating the Time War. Because they were in the vortex - no where, and no when - it wasn't inconceivable for her to be here, but that kind of temporal gymnastics meant that council interference was definitely involved, and that meant... Well, it meant annoyance, was what it meant. "Well, no use standing around here," he said brightly. "Might as well come in for some tea." He took Sarah's hand. "Right, darling?"

Sarah gave his hand a squeeze. Whoever this woman was, she was sure the Doctor was not going to let him bully either of them around. She smiled at him confidently. "Right sweetheart."

The three of them walked back to the house. As they drew closer to the door, six faces jumped away from the kitchen windows.

Romana stared inquisitively at the six children as she entered the kitchen. "I see that you have totally disregarded every law of time haven't you Doctor," Romana said with authority. "You must realize of course, that you have no right whatsoever to possess a loom, or to produce so many young Time Lords without the consent of the council or your house," she gestured in frustration. "I had hoped to be able to persuade the council to give you a light punishment, but in lieu of what I've seen in the past few minutes, I doubt if they would be willing to even listen to me now."

The Doctor laughed. "Well, I have no idea what I'm in trouble for this time, but actually there's one less thing for you to worry about. I do not, in fact, possess a loom. These children were all born the old fashioned way." He rubbed Sarah's stomach and leaned down to talk to it. "Isn't that right, seven and eight?"

Romana blushed and turned her head away. "Please, I must ask you not to be so vulgar in my presence, Doctor. Remember I am a Time Lady of the first order," she spat her words at him disapprovingly.

"Vulgar is it," Sarah Jane said jumping into the conversation furiously. "I'll have you know that there's nothing vulgar about loving someone. What I think is a disgrace is a whole planet of cold uncaring parents who have children on a loom and barely touch them after they do."

The Doctor stepped between Sarah and Romana quickly. "I think Romana was referring more to the actual … er …" He looked over at the children staring at them. "The … er … process of … er ... let's have some tea. Romana, you said something about trouble? What's the council on about now?"

Sarah Jane looked over at her children too. "I think DR that you and Lissie should take the rest of the children into the play room and stay there with them. Daddy and I are going to talk to our guest for a while." She gave the two oldest her no arguing look.

"Come on everyone," said Lissie shrugging. "You heard Mum, let's head into the playroom."

"Can we play Splodget Rockets?" asked Colin. "Thomas got to pick last time."

"Then yes you may Colin, but remember to take turns and when you finish the game, it's Tory's turn to pick," said Sarah Jane as she gave them all a reassuring glance.

The children broke into a run as they headed out of the kitchen. They were all shouting enthusiastically about which characters they wanted to be as they left.

Davy stepped behind the Doctor's legs, hiding shyly from Romana.

The Doctor drew him out and gave him a 'and what about you' look.

"I wanna stay," he said.

The Doctor looked over at Sarah.

"Sorry Davy," she said and mussed his hair. "Adults only, off you go."

"But I'm an adult," he said, putting his fists on his hips and pulling himself up to his full height, hoping to impress their guest. "I'm Wonder Man."

The Doctor tried not to laugh. "Well, Wonder Man, this conversation is off limits."

"No conversation is off limits to Wonder Man," Davy said, running out of the room.

The Doctor held up a finger to tell Romana and Sarah to wait, then sighed and quietly walked to the doorway. He reached his arm around the doorjamb and pulled Davy back into the room by his collar. He lifted the boy onto his hip. "If Wonder Man doesn't go to the playroom, he's not getting any dessert."

Davy sniffed the air in the kitchen. "All right, I'll go for now, but only because my super senses tell me that we're having those caramel apple cupcakes over there on the counter for afters." He jumped down and headed out of the room, sulking as he went.

The Doctor chuckled and pulled out a chair for Sarah. "Sorry about the interruption. Davy's our youngest, still a little bit of a handful."

"From the looks of him," Romana said, "he's just been … er … born."

"Actually. he was born six years ago. You see, all of our children were conceived and grew naturally in my body. They are the first Time Lords to be born from a womb and with a navel," said Sarah Jane proudly.

Romana's eyes got wide. "Conceived in … born from …" She leaned in close. "How do they get out?"

"Well, they..." the Doctor started, then blushed. "Er … Sarah?"

Sarah suddenly felt superior to the Time Lady standing before her. She may not have been born and raised Gallifreyan, or had all the knowledge this woman possessed, but she was a Time Lady nonetheless and one who was capable of bearing children, something no other Time Lady could do. She put her hand on her stomach and rubbed it. "When the twins are ready to be born, I will start to go into something called labor. I'll feel my body getting ready to deliver them. Then I'll go to a hospital and my doctor and his staff will help me express the twins from my body."

"Express them? But … how?"

"They'll uhm, come out of an opening that's, uhm," Sarah Jane was watching the Doctor's face grow redder as he squirmed with discomfort. She realized how embarrassing this must be for him, so she leaned over and whispered the rest in Romana's ear.

Romana began to sputter. "But... that's impossible!"

"No, it's um … not impossible," the Doctor said, recovering his composure somewhat. "Sarah will go into labor and they'll er … come out."

Romana stared, flabbergasted.

"Yes," Sarah Jane continued explaining. First I'll start having what's called contractions and the contractions will be mild at first and then when," she paused a moment. She looked down and then back up. "My water's broken," she said with surprise.

"Right," the Doctor said. "Her water will break, and then it'll be time to go to the hospital."

"No, Doctor, you don't understand," said Sarah emphatically. "My water has broken."

The Doctor stared at her. "As in right now?"

"Yes," Sarah Jane laughed nervously. "As in right now."

"Right, then," the Doctor said, becoming agitated. "We need to get there right away, then. You stay here and I'll go set the coordinates." He stood up and ran out of the room.

Sarah Jane turned nervously to Romana. "Well then, it would seem that you just got an opportunity to learn about birthing babies first hand," Sarah said trying not to quote from 'Gone with the Wind' and holding back her laughter. It wasn't easy for her though, because the look on the Time Lady's face was priceless.

"Why did he leave? Are they coming out right now? What do I do?" Romana looked like she would rather have been eaten by wild andrebeasts, spit out, chewed up again, and spread on toast, than be where she was at this moment.

Sarah couldn't help herself. She roared with laughter. When she managed finally to stop long enough to talk, she put a reassuring hand on Romana's shoulder. "He'll be right back, he just went to set the co-ordinates for the hospital. I apologize for laughing," she said choking back more giggles. "It's just that you look so horrified."

Romana regained her composure and drew herself up. "I am not horrified," she said. "I was merely concerned."

Sarah Jane's eyes were twinkling as she bit her lip to keep from laughing even more. "Sure you were, and your concern is very touching." She was so amused by the pompous woman, that even though she knew she shouldn't, she couldn't help teasing her just a bit. "Would you like to feel a contraction? I'm having a pretty mild one right now."

Romana looked like she might reach out, but before she did, she pulled back. "No, I think I will hold off, thank you."

Before she could say any more, six children bounded into the room. "Mom," DR said, "can we help you up or anything?"

Sarah smiled at her brood. "No dear I'm fine, no worries." She turned to face Romana once more. "You haven't really met the children yet have you?"

"No, I haven't." She looked hard at Sarah. "Six?"

Sarah Jane smiled at her. "For now, but soon to be eight."

The Doctor came running back into the room, out of breath. "All right, we've landed at the hospital," he turned to Sarah, "and yes, I've confirmed that it is actually the hospital, but we have a problem."

"What's wrong, darling?" she asked him.

"I can't get hold of Uncle Jack to babysit."

"Oh no! Who else can we get," said Sarah with concern. "We can't leave the children alone."

"Dad," DR said, "we don't really need Uncle Jack. I'm sixteen, I can watch everyone."

Romana was about to say something when the Doctor held out a hand to stop her. "Absolutely not. We'll just have to …" He looked over at Romana and smiled. "What about you? You could do it."

Romana looked at him, then looked over at the children, then looked back at him. "You must be joking, Doctor."

"No, I'm deadly serious," he said. "Someone's got to be responsible for these children, and I'm going to be in the delivery room with Sarah Jane. That leaves you."

Romana looked back at the children once more. They were all smiling at her, but Davy was looking at her with a goofy grin of sheer adoration. She turned back to the Doctor. "Can't you take them with you?"

"Can you imagine that sort of chaos in the delivery room? Of course not." He began to help Sarah up. "So good of you to help out, Romana, I knew I could count on you. DR, get the hospital's wheelchair, I left it at the door in the console room." He began ushering Sarah out towards the door. "Children, be good, and when we come back you'll have two more siblings."

Romana turned to the children and smiled confidently at them. After all, she'd faced much worse situations than this before. "Now then, what are your names, and what would you all like to do while we're waiting for you parents to come back?"

"Please be on your best behavior children and don't give daddy's friend a hard time. Introduce yourselves to her and play nice. With any luck, maybe Uncle Jack will show up in a little while," Sarah Jane called over her shoulder. She turned to the Doctor as he wheeled her quickly out of the TARDIS and into the hospital. "I'm not sure leaving her alone with the children is a very good idea dear. I don't think she can handle it."

"Nonsense," the Doctor said. "She's a Time Lady. She can handle anything."

Seven hours later, the door to the TARDIS opened and the Doctor wheeled Sarah Jane through it. She looked tired and happy, and a tiny little Time Lord lay in the crook of each arm, sleeping peacefully.

"Don't the twins look angelic right now darling," whispered Sarah Jane. "Let's enjoy this while we can. Once they wake up, our lives will never be the same."

"Definitely. We haven't tried two at once yet. Despite the hassle, I'm glad we decided on two gifts each." They'd long ago made it a tradition that the new baby leaves a gift hidden in the TARDIS for each of his or her older siblings. It worked well to ease the tensions, but with twelve gifts to hide, it had taken some doing so the children wouldn't find them before the twins arrived.

He kissed her on the forehead. "I don't hear any screaming, so either everything's gone fine, or Romana's just killed all of the children and left," he joked.

"That's not funny, Doctor." Sarah paused. "You don't think she'd really hurt them do you?"

"No," he smiled. "Of course not. I'd be more concerned about her than them." He wheeled her up the ramp they'd installed over the front steps of the house for just this purpose, and into the living room. Everything looked immaculate, and Romana was sitting on the couch, intact, a bit of dirt on the knees of her dress the only sign that she'd ever done anything but sit in council meetings all day.

"Hullo uhm, I'm sorry, I don't know what you'd like me to call you," whispered Sarah Jane.

"Romana," she said quietly.

"Well Romana, I'd really like to thank you for taking care of the children for us while we were gone," smiled Sarah. "This is Patrick and Peter, our newest additions to the family."

Romana looked at the newborns as though she hadn't realized that they were anything but objects d'art. "Those? Those are … Time Lords?"

As if on cue, one of the twins woke up and started crying softly. Hearing his cry, his brother awoke and decided to join him, wailing as loudly as he could. In a matter of seconds, both babies were trembling angrily and crying loudly. The older children, hearing them cry, all came running into the room in their pajamas, shouting excitedly about the new babies in a cacophony of excitement.

"All right, that's it!" Romana shouted above the din. "Everyone quiet, NOW!"

Everyone but Patrick and Peter fell silent. The two babies kept screaming, as though nothing had happened. Romana looked at them angrily, but when that had no effect, she screamed a primal scream, and they fell silent.

"Well I'm impressed," said Sarah Jane, stifling her amusement at Romana's outburst. "Maybe we should ask you to stay on as our live in sitter."

"Your live in …" Romana looked like her head would explode. "Do you know what I've been through in the last 7 hours, 42 minutes and 38 seconds?" She pointed to Thomas and Colin. "These two wanted to play rugby, but failed to mention that it was a contact sport." She pointed to the dirt on her dress, then to DR. "This one asked more questions about Gallifreyan law and tradition than I answered in my entire time at school. Have you taught these children nothing? And this one," she said, pointing to Elisabeth, "wanted me to arrange her hair more than seven times, while her sister-" she pointed to Victoria - "asked seemingly hundreds of questions about my time traveling with you. Finally, I agreed when they suggested that we bake a cake for the babies' birthday hoping that it would occupy them, but nobody mentioned," she said, dragging the Doctor to the kitchen door and opening it to reveal a disaster from ceiling to floor, "that they didn't know how to accomplish such a feat. I could have kept it all under control, except for the fact that that one..." She pointed to Davy (who still had a look of adoration on his face) as if he were the devil incarnate. "THAT ONE WON'T STOP STARING AT ME!"

The Doctor put an arm around her shoulder and guided her back to the couch. "Now, Romana, it's going to be all right. They're just children. Let's change the subject. You came here to bring me back to Gallifrey because I'm in some sort of trouble?"

Romana stood up and backed away from him. "Oh no. No, no, no. I am definitely not bringing you back to Gallifrey. There is nothing they can sentence you to that's worse than this!" And with that, she pulled a recall device from her pocket, pushed the button, and was gone.

The twins were sleeping again and Sarah Jane and the Doctor put them gently into their cribs. As soon as they were out of hearing distance, Sarah Jane doubled over with laughter.